From Pokfulam to Central

Qu Zhi leaned his back on the chair weakly, and half his face was hidden in the darkness, "Later, under my mother's painstaking efforts, that person took away 10,000+ yuan deposits back and forth and was temporarily dismissed. But my voluntary Already handed in, although the second choice is still a few parallels in architecture, but the first choice has been handed over to the law.

"The rest of the process went smoothly. Reviewing, exams, and scoring. The teacher looked at my estimated score and told me that as long as the gap between the estimated score and the actual score was not too big, my first choice should be stable. I didn't have to worry about it. But you know I am What do you think? I regret it. As a college entrance examination candidate, I sincerely pray every day that my first choice will fail, because only in this way can I have the opportunity to enter the second round.

"But the admission results came out within a few days. I will never forget that afternoon curled up on the sofa with my computer in my arms, and the moment I found out the admission results on the Internet. That feeling was like the feeling that my heart had been crushed by someone. I punched hard, and the feeling of suffocation began to spread in my chest. At the same time, my mother started calling relatives and friends. Their congratulatory words poured out of the receiver, and every word pierced like a needle. to my eardrums.

"But all I can do is pretend that I am the happiest one, and then thank my uncles and aunts in a sensible way. I feel that I am a big joke. That is the first time I discovered that people The fate of my life is not in my own hands. I feel like a train roaring away. No matter how fast it runs and how many people are left behind, the track has already been set. And this direction will always be It's not going to lead to where I want to go."

Even if I recall it now, this experience is still not a "past" thing for Qu Zhi.After a long silence, he came out of the shadows and returned to the place of light, and smiled again: "This is my story."

Zhou Mi didn't know why he felt so uncomfortable in his heart, it was obvious that this didn't happen to him, and it was obvious that the person involved could calmly and completely tell the whole story.Zhou Mi watched Qu Zhi maintain the most appropriate state in front of him, looked at his turbulent deep sea hidden under the light wind and calm clouds, and felt his powerlessness and anxiety wrapped in a strong shell.The more Qu Zhi is like this, the more Zhou Mi can't bear it.

He hugged him, rather than wanting to comfort the other party, he hoped that he would comfort himself.

Qu Zhi doesn't like to report his worries in front of his friends, because he is most afraid that the other party will show sympathy or even pity in person after learning about his troubles, no matter how big or small.So when Qu Zhi finished his narration, he was very afraid that Zhou Mi would also reveal those emotions that would make him feel embarrassed, never thought that Zhou Mi would be like this.

Qu Zhi was in a trance, in such a quiet late night, he thought he was dreaming, but the secret trembling from his shoulders actually existed.Zhou Mi looked as if he was the one who was more wronged, but Qu Zhi's heart found a suitable place to rest. He didn't push him away, but put his hands on his shoulders.

"It's because I don't know the depth," Zhou Mi said with a heavy tone, "Qu Zhi, I'm sorry."

Qu Zhi patted Zhou Mi's back jerky, and coaxed him embarrassingly, "You don't need to say sorry, I wanted to say it myself, and you didn't force me to tell you."

Zhou Mi really wanted to just hold him like this and not let go, "I'm sorry then."

But in the end, Qu Zhi gently pushed him away, because he wanted to look into Zhou Mi's eyes.Zhou Mi's eyes were red, but he didn't cry, just like his previous self.

"Actually, later on, I also began to wonder," Qu Zhi said slowly, letting go of Zhou Mi's shoulders, "whether all this is really a predestined arrangement that cannot be escaped.

"At the beginning, I thought about repeating the exam, but I shrank because I expected the opposition from my family. After I entered the university, I considered the possibility of changing my major, but I put it on hold because the school didn't have a bachelor's degree in architecture. The most recent time It was a year ago when I was applying for a master's school. I knew that this might be the last chance in my life to set things right. I weighed it over and over for a long time, but finally gave up.

"At that time, I felt that I had studied law for four years, put in time and energy, and had achieved some results. It would be an unwise choice to abandon everything I had acquired and start over from scratch at this time. And changing majors is not everyone's choice. It is so simple to think, especially it is difficult to transfer from liberal arts to engineering, because it means that the things I learned in the four years of undergraduate will become useless. If I insist on switching to architecture, then I will not study for a master’s degree. It's a second bachelor's degree, and another four years. I can't afford that time.

"At that time, I firmly believed that no matter who it is, as long as he has walked along a straight track for a long time, then inertia will make it difficult for him to turn, let alone turn around. But recently, I have begun to doubt the current result. Whether it is actually caused by my own personality, I began to re-examine the cause and effect of all this, just after I met you."

Zhou Mi thought he heard it wrong, and said blankly, "Me?"

Qu Zhi stared at Zhou Mi's face seriously, then smiled suddenly, "Yes, it's you."

"I have to admit," Qu Zhi sat up straight, his black eyes shining inexplicably in the night, "You have already begun to have an impact on me, especially your attitude towards this world."

manner?Zhou Mi doesn’t feel that he has any special attitude towards the world.

Qu Zhi himself continued: "If you say that I am a pessimist who is negative, cowardly, and believes that everything in the world has its own destiny and cannot be changed by manpower, then you are an active, fearless, gambler Use all your strength to touch all possible people in this world.

"When you told me that you won the opportunity to take the make-up exam from Teacher Qian, I felt unprecedented joy, not only for you, but also for myself. Because you used this incident to show me that there is still a A possibility that is completely opposite to my outlook on life. I admire you, envy you, I want to be close to you, I want to learn from you."

The half-bright and half-dark nightlight cast a fluffy yellow light on Qu Zhi's face, giving a rare warmth to this wet and cold southern night.

After washing the dishes, Qu Zhi went back to the room and lay down. He suddenly wanted to give himself a vacation tonight.For a long time, Qu Zhi has been used to forcing himself to do some things hard, because he felt that the weight of life was too heavy, so he had to use all his strength to carry it.But after tonight, when a secret was shared, its original weight was halved.Qu Zhi found that although there were no fewer things waiting for him to do, he seemed to be able to face life with a more relaxed attitude.

At the same time, Zhou Mi in the other room is doomed to sleepless tonight.

In fact, as early as the last time he visited Liu Jie, Zhou Mi already had a vague premonition that Qu Zhi might have grown up in a single-parent family.What he didn't expect was that such a family would have such a difficult life.

Qu Zhi is right, he was indeed a fearless optimist before, believing that as long as a person is willing to give everything for his goal, he will eventually achieve his wish.He calls it "life plasticity," but tonight, something he's always believed in was shaken.

Zhou Mi discovered that his so-called belief was just because he had never experienced any real ordeal.He was born in a wealthy family. Even if the family inevitably stumbles, their hearts are always tied together.In the past 20 years, although he could not be said to be carefree, at least it went smoothly. Even if the things he wanted were not handed to him, he could at least reach them on tiptoes and stretched out his hands. setbacks.

Zhou Mi discovered that his so-called belief was not based on how strong he was, but he was lucky enough to have the innate starting point and capital endowed by his native family, so he was able to avoid all the difficulties in this world. In order to avoid all the regrets that cannot be expected.

Zhou Mi asked himself, if he was put in the position of Qu Zhi, would he be able to do as well as him?

He couldn't answer.

Zhou Mi only knows that in this world, not everyone is lucky enough to hold the lead that controls the kite of their own life. It turns out that for some people, life is full of many wishes that cannot be fulfilled even if they work hard.

Zhou Mi was in his room, silently looking in Qu Zhi's direction.

If you say that you let Qu Zhi see a possibility that you have never seen before, then at the same time, Qu Zhi also made yourself aware of the real wind and rain that has been kept out by parents and elders for a long time.

So, Qu Zhi, you are not cowardly.