La Ronde

I just regret knowing you.

Under the effect of the sedative, Conrad quickly fell asleep.Valentino didn't close his eyes for two days, but he couldn't calm down for a while.

After Dr. Gooden left, he sat on the edge of the bed, staring at Conrad's peaceful sleeping face, and gently stroking his blond hair.

He knew that Conrad must have had a hard time accepting the truth, that students and workers had taken to the streets to bring down privilege and erase class, but he used the privilege of the aristocracy to forcibly interrupt his struggle.

But even if it is not today, Conrad will still have to face this reality in the future.The French Communist Party is dominated by Stalinist supporters, and the Trotskyites who support real workers' democracy are not popular.Without the right leaders, workers' revolutions will most likely fail.

Valentino sighed. He knew what it was like to have a young flame snuffed out.Conrad was different from him. Although he also participated in demonstrations and riots, he always held a cautious attitude towards it in his heart.Although Conrad initially seemed to have little interest in the revolution, after Kurt's arrest, he devoted himself to the cause without reservation.Maybe he didn't understand the meaning of those philosophers' sentences on the wall, but he realized how the privileged existence could cause innocent individuals misfortune.

Valentino thought about how to explain all this to Conrad as gently as possible, and after thinking about it, he lay down on Conrad's bedside and fell asleep.

When he woke up again, it was already dark.Before he could move his sore neck, he looked up and saw Conrad leaning soberly on the head of the bed.Conrad's face was calm, neither mournful nor angry to see him awake.Valentino noticed with heartache that Conrad's eyes had lost their usual brilliance, and he asked, "Is there something wrong with you?"

Conrad licked his chapped lips, his eyes were still blank: "I'm fine, sir. Without your help, I'm still tossing and falling asleep on the floor of the detention center. I really don't know what to do. Thank you, Prince Valentino."

"Conrad!" Valentino raised his voice.Conrad was still calm, and he suddenly remembered that Valentino said that he had a dog that was a bit stupid.Maybe that's the same tone he used to call the dog when it made him angry.

He has forgotten why he was so sure that a nobleman would be friends with him?

Valentino walked over and closed the curtains, and his mood seemed to stabilize again.He clearly stated to Conrad: "Listen to me, the French Communist Party will compromise with the government recently and discuss how to improve the conditions of workers. The revolution will end here, and you don't need to suffer..."

Conrad sneered uncharacteristically: "You are worthy of reading so many books, they guide you to recognize the situation in the first place..."

Valentino said nothing, he was afraid that he would say something irreversible on the spur of the moment.So he just gets a glass of water, puts it on the bedside table, and pushes it over to Conrad, hoping he'll moisten his lips.

Conrad didn't take the glass of water.He laughed until he even had some desolate meaning: "Valentino, you are an aristocrat, and you are also an intellectual. The success or failure of the revolution will not affect you in any way. But what about me? What about Kurt? Those What about the workers and students who bet their future on this..."

Conrad's bloodless lips trembled, and there was a strange brilliance in his eyes: "If we don't succeed, we still have to live in fear every day, worrying that one day we will be arrested by the guards for our workers. Worrying about one day If the salary is not paid, life is difficult. Valentino, I know I don't blame you. On the contrary, I should thank you, you have worked hard these days. I just regret knowing you, art, study tour, castle ...this is your world, and mine is a struggle for survival. We have nothing to talk about."

Valentino felt that someone was stabbing him in the heart with a knife, and he would rather Conrad scold him.He almost begged and said: "But my world is boring, it lacks you. After May, you can go back to Milan with me, go to Milan, I promise I won't let you live that kind of dreadful life again..."

Conrad's fingers twitched slightly under the covers, but finally he didn't reach out.

He looked at the other party's neatly groomed brown hair messily scattered on the side of the face, and said softly as if falling into a dream: "Valentino, do you remember, when I first came here to look for you, you and I Said what? You said you wanted to live in the real. I don't know what kind of real you're talking about. But even if I haven't read anything, I know that real can't be like this - with status and status Build a solid case for yourself, and your favorite toys."

Speaking of this, he became sincerely sad, and he turned back to that straightforward child, with emotion in his blue eyes: "You told me the examples of cufflinks and paintings at that time, how well you said that. The pursuit Where did you go, free and true?"

"No, I was wrong at that time..." Valentino supported Conrad's shoulders and looked at him seriously: "I, and those students, the truth and freedom we want are all specific ideologies Don’t those young people in Prague want authenticity and freedom? But under totalitarianism, the freedom they want is precisely the freedom of the consumer society we want to abandon.”

"And we, we demand the freedom not to consume precisely because we have the freedom to consume. People always struggle repeatedly and fall into the same predicament. This pursuit must eventually go to the other extreme. At that time, people will miss Freedom of consumption..." After Valentino finished speaking, seeing Conrad's eyes were a little confused, the two seemed to have returned to the previous time.At this time, he should explain in simple words or give some examples.

But he didn't continue to explain what he just said. He just looked at Conrad and said word by word: "But there is only one kind of freedom I want now, and that is the freedom to be with you."

After speaking, Valentino's face was pressed down, and Conrad looked at his dark eyes, thinking about what he just said, and his heart became more and more confused.In the end, he still didn't refuse, and passively accepted the passionate kiss.

***

De Ville's article appeared in the newspapers, and Valentino's return gift had been sent to his residence, and everything was as he expected.

That impassioned article won him the goodwill of many on the left, and some even offered to visit him.Of course, he doesn't really have much to talk about with those young students with utopian ideals.Although he can handle it well, for him, it's just a waste of time.

Today's guest is different.Devillers thought this while looking in the mirror.He carefully checked his clothes for any creases, and there was no room for error in this meeting.

After tidying himself up decently, he went out.He passed by the wall outside the school and saw that people had put on new slogans. The bright red paint hurt people's eyes in the sun: Prohibition "Prohibition"!

He thought it was funny, but he didn't shrug his shoulders or grimace, as young people his age are used to.He still maintained a dignified and elegant posture, and marched towards his destination with firm and powerful steps.

Prohibition and prohibition means that everything should be allowed, and people want an omnipotent world.Do I need to ask others for this?De Ville thought.At least he doesn't have to, he has already achieved his own omnipotence.

His eyes swept over the angry young people on the street, and those who recognized him greeted him with surprised expressions.While he returned a charming smile, he couldn't help thinking with some secret pleasure that if these people knew whose appointment he was going to, they might pry up the few remaining paving stones and smash him to death, and then use his Blood wrote new slogans on the white walls.

He forced himself to forget about these distractions, concentrating on recalling the prepared speech and reminding himself of the details to pay attention to—he now needs to play a moderate leftist of the center, the kind who is happy to do something to reconcile the contradictions between left and right.

Finally, he saw the majestic Bourbon Palace.

He slowed down his pace and climbed up the long ladder step by step.Walking to the towering colonnade, he felt so small.But when he looked back and saw the bustling people with blurred faces in the distance under the stairs, he didn't think so again.He straightened his suit again, and then walked into the gate of the Bourbon Palace.This time, like the first time he left the town of his birth, he didn't look back.

***

The next day, Valentino woke up first.He took into account that Conrad was injured last night, and the two of them didn't make it to the last step.But it was obvious that Conrad was still tired, and his eyes were slightly blue.Valentino kissed his eyes and forehead respectively, and was ready to get up and take a shower.

When he was ready to take care of himself, the waiter just brought up breakfast, and Conrad also woke up at this time.Valentino asked him to lie down and rest for a while, and turned on the radio in the room by the way, listening to it while eating:

"...Today, General de Gaulle visited Romania. Prime Minister Pompidou and Minister of the Interior Jacques Chirac made a request for negotiations with the labor side on his behalf...Segui, the secretary of the French Federation of Trade Unions, publicly stated that if the government and management recognize the power of the Federation of Trade Unions, they are willing Agree to negotiate with it..."

Valentino stopped the knife and fork in his hand. He was not surprised by this result, but he didn't expect the Federation of Trade Unions to raise the white flag so soon. At this time, he was more worried about Conrad.

He looked over and saw that Conrad had closed his eyes again. He clenched his teeth and made no sound, but the tears still oozed quietly, crawled over the corners of his eyes, and flowed down two winding trails, until they sank into the pale blond hair. .

Perhaps from the beginning to the end, neither the French Communist Party nor the trade unions seriously considered revolution.

The streets are still so noisy, the pavement is still without paving stones, and the young people are still shouting for the power of the imagination.But soon all this will be forgotten.People will listen to chanson, drink coffee, or dance a dance as before, and accept the rule of power in a peaceful and pleasant atmosphere.The struggle is over, Utopia disappears again, and people wait for the siren's song to sound again, so that they can go to a grand festival dance together. The word "revolution" has finally returned to its original meaning - repeated rotation. *1

*1 revolution (revolution), re=again, volut=rotate