it's dark, coax me

Zhou Xing looked at Gu Xiu intently, and continued: "I don't know how to describe what you mean to me. I owe Xie Jie a favor, but it's not because of this that I promised to take care of you. It's the kind of fans who see celebrities. Feeling, you should understand, right?"

"But using this kind of relationship to describe how I feel about you may not be appropriate. I am not young enough to be able to cheer for someone like a fan. I was just thinking that if I had the opportunity to meet you, I would It’s great, if you can help, that’s even better.”

"So you really don't have to worry that you will cause me trouble if you stay here. To be honest, I'm actually quite honored that you are here."

Zhou Xing usually doesn't talk much, but it's not easy for him to say so much like today.

He didn't know if what he said was useful to Gu Xiu, and he didn't know if he had clearly stated what he wanted to express, but he still hoped that what he said could somewhat touch Gu Xiu.

At least, let him stop thinking that he will cause trouble to others all the time.

Gu Xiu stared at Zhou Xing in a daze. He didn't expect that Zhou Xing had read his book and could even remember the sentences in the book.

That book was his first published book, and also his first completed book in the true sense. It was actually a bit immature both in terms of writing and storyline.

The only good thing about that book is probably its sincerity.

At that time, he thought that he had finally overcome depression and everything was fine. He thought that he had finally passed the long night and ushered in the sunrise. He wrote every word of this book with this mood.

Who would have thought that he had never been able to get out of the gray fog, it was just his self-righteousness.

Gu Xiu smiled wryly, "You're disappointed, right? You probably wouldn't have thought that I would be such a person. I haven't even had a good life myself, but I'm still encouraging others."

"No, I just want to tell you that without you, I might not be where I am now, so I really want to thank you and hope to do something for you."

Zhou Xing's tone was a little gentle, "You are always talking about your bad parts, maybe you should face yourself, no one is perfect, you may think that you are not good enough, but in my eyes, you are already very good .”

Gu Xiu seldom heard such positive, positive, and powerful comments from people. He asked back, "You really think so?"

When he said this, he looked straight at Zhou Xing, as if he was probing the expression in his eyes.

Zhou Xing could feel that Gu Xiu was denying himself again and again.

Although he knew that this might be due to his illness, he didn't want to see Gu Xiu like this.

At this moment, Gu Xiu was restless as if he was waiting for the trial.

Zhou Xing smiled and took Gu Xiu's hand and placed it on his chest, "I promise, what I said is true."

Under the palm was Zhou Xing's powerful heartbeat, and Gu Xiu only felt that his own heart seemed to come to life slowly, beating along with Zhou Xing's heart.

Zhou Xing asked with a smile, "Did you feel it?"

Gu Xiu responded slightly uncomfortably, and withdrew his hand.

After a while, the corners of his mouth raised slightly unconsciously.

The previous low mood seemed to dissipate so silently all of a sudden.

After Zhou walked, Gu Xiu sat alone in the room and lost his mind. He had fantasized many times before. When he was sick and in pain, it would be great if someone could be by his side, if someone could save him. Now , this person seems to have really appeared.

Thinking of Zhou Xing, he also thought of Zhou Xing knocking on his car window in the heavy rain and taking him home from the muddy path.

Thinking of Zhou Xing finding him after he fell down the mountain, picking him up, carrying him all the way up the steep slope, and sending him to the hospital.

Thinking of the meticulous care he has taken for him these days.

Thinking of how on the way back, Zhou Xing put his clothes on him and gave him a warm hug.

Thinking of what he said just now...

Zhou Xing is like a savior who belongs to him alone, always appearing silently when he is embarrassed and in pain, and then pulls him out of the abyss of pain.

Zhou Xing is a person who is too warm, so he can't help but want to get closer and closer, as if in this way, he can absorb more warmth from him, as if in this way he can melt away the toughness in himself. ice.

After Zhou Xing returned to his room, he couldn't calm down for a while.

He was sitting at the table, and suddenly saw a brooch with a yellow smiling face on the table shelf.

This is the first trophy he got when the army participated in a certain activity. Of course, this is not the main reward, it should be regarded as a bonus.

Looking at this cheerful smiling face at this moment, Zhou Xing suddenly thought of Gu Xiu.

Gu Xiu actually looks pretty when he smiles, but he seldom smiles, most of the time his eyes are somewhat gloomy.

He should smile more.

After Gu Xiu got up early the next morning, he was in a much better state.

When he arrived at the living room, he saw Zhou Xing sitting on the sofa.

Gu Xiu greeted Zhou Xing with a smile, Zhou Xing carefully observed Gu Xiu's expression, and asked, "Do you feel better?"

"Feeling better, sorry for yesterday."

"It's okay, speaking of it, I was the one who urged you to drink yesterday."

Zhou Xing hoped that Gu Xiu would be happier by doing what he wanted to do.

After breakfast, Zhou Xing put the brooch into Gu Xiu's palm.

Gu Xiu looked at the thing in his hand in surprise and asked, "This is?"

"For you, I hope you can smile more."

Gu Xiu felt that under normal circumstances, this kind of thing seemed to be worn only by children, but he still took the brooch away.

While the two were talking, Gu Xiu's cell phone rang. He picked up the cell phone and glanced at it, and only after returning to his room did he answer the call.

The call was from Gu Xiu's psychiatrist, Qin Cheng.

After Gu Xiu connected the phone, a gentle voice came from the other side, "How are you feeling recently?"

Gu Xiu pointed at the small brooch with his finger, and said, "It's pretty good."

"You should still come to the hospital. You need stable psychological counseling in your current situation."

"I have received psychological counseling too many times before, and I don't think it has much effect on me. You know the specific situation of my consultation."

Qin Cheng did know that he was Gu Xiu's attending doctor, and he had taken over Gu Xiu's care since he was a sophomore in high school. He was very clear about Gu Xiu's entire illness and treatment process.

Gu Xiu's acceptance of psychological counseling is indeed not very high, but after all, psychological treatment has been scientifically tested and can play a certain role. This can also help doctors understand the patient's situation more accurately.

"It is still recommended that you come to the hospital for psychological counseling once a week. Although I can also chat on the phone to understand your general situation, but in non-face-to-face situations, there may be some details, and I will make some judgments. Mistakes."

"And if you come to the hospital, you can also do some tests to understand your condition more specifically."

Gu Xiu responded, the other party is nearly fifty this year, he is his elder, and one of the few people who has always been patient with him and cared about him, Gu Xiu did not want to refute the other party, but regarding receiving weekly psychological treatment However, he couldn't arouse too much interest in it.

Gu Xiu changed the subject and said, "Wait until I go back, I'm not in City C right now."

"Are you participating in a new book sale in another city?"

"No, I'm traveling."

Qin Cheng smiled and said, "Traveling is also a good way to relieve emotions. Have you fallen ill again recently?"

The call was very long this time, and Gu Xiu didn't hang up until more than 40 minutes later.

After hanging up the phone, he went to the balcony and lit a cigarette.

He held the yellow brooch in his hand all the time, and he looked at it over and over for a long time, maybe he should really smile more, after this relapse, he was indeed a bit too decadent.

Relapses of depression are a very common occurrence.

If so many people can come out of a relapse, why can't he?

Isn't he much better now than before?

At least he still has Xie Jie, the doctor, a few friends, and Zhou Xing.

And compared to when he had no money to go to the hospital for treatment and no money to prescribe medicine, at least now he has enough money and no need to worry about any treatment costs.

He has overcome it before, and now, it may be time for him to muster up the courage to start fighting again.

He thought of what Qin Cheng said on the phone just now, "Just taking medicine is not enough, you also need to have a good attitude towards life."

Gu Xiu pinned the brooch on his clothes, put out the cigarette in his hand, and called Xie Jie.

Xie Jie answered the phone and asked with a smile, "How do you feel these days?"

"Yesterday I went to the picking garden with Zhou Xing and stayed for a whole day. I felt very happy. Recently, I was so full of mushrooms that I was recovering from my injuries."

You must know that it is very rare to hear the word happy from the mouth of a depression patient. In fact, even when Gu Xiu’s condition has not relapsed, Xie Jie rarely heard him say that he felt very happy about something. .

Hearing what Gu Xiu said at this moment, he relaxed a little, and said with a smile, "It's as long as you feel happy, and Zhou Xingduo can take you out for a walk later."

"It's been a troublesome time for Zhou Xing. I want to do something for him. Do you have any suggestions for this?"

Gu Xiu asked this question really suddenly, which also stumped Xie Jie.

Zhou Xing is a very righteous person. When he told Zhou Xing about this before, he didn't think too much about it. We are all good buddies, so don't be too polite.

But when he heard Gu Xiu's question, he didn't know what to do on Gu Xiu's side.

He was just about to ask if you could give Zhou Xing a set of your autographed books, or just give him whatever he likes, when Gu Xiu asked, "I think his side of the farmhouse seems a little too deserted." , what do you think if I ask someone to help promote it?"

Xie Jie couldn't laugh or cry when he heard the words. After he knew about Gu Xiu's condition and Gu Xiu's plan to travel alone, he felt very uneasy.

He tried to stop him before, but failed, and he also thought about finding an excuse to go out with Gu Xiu, but he refused.

Later, he also consulted with a doctor. The doctor said that going out for a walk is good for his mood recovery. He also said that moderate depression is actually not a particularly serious condition. In particular, Gu Xiu has no suicidal thoughts so far. Treatment, don't worry too much.

It was under such circumstances that he made such an arrangement.

He has been to Zhou Xing's place before, it is sparsely populated, it is more suitable for relaxing, and it is relatively not easy to irritate Gu Xiu.

Moreover, Zhou Xing has a good temper, has served in the army, is vigilant, and has good skills. If Gu Xiu falls ill, he will not be hurt. He can help take care of Gu Xiu at ordinary times.

Zhou Xing himself was also a reader of Gu Xiu, and he also agreed with this arrangement, so the matter was settled.

But he couldn't explain the specific reasons to Gu Xiu in detail at that time, so he didn't tell Gu Xiu about Zhou Xing's situation in detail, he only said that he helped him choose a place to travel.

In fact, he didn't specifically say anything about farmhouses. Gu Xiu subconsciously felt that the hotels he opened in the countryside were all farmhouses, so he subconsciously took Zhou Xing's place as a farmhouse. This was actually a misunderstanding.

But now this misunderstanding is a bit difficult to explain, so he just said: "He probably doesn't like many people to disturb him, and his main business is not this. I think you thank him, but you don't have to start from this aspect..."

Xie Jie was rambling over there trying to get this matter over with, but Gu Xiu's attention had already begun to wander.

He thought of the Picking Garden. He had learned something from the conversations of several people before, and knew that the Picking Garden should be Zhou Xing's main source of income.

Judging from Zhang Hui's previous words, the situation in the picking garden is very good, and it seems that they don't need help.

As for Zhou Xing's hobbies...

Zhou Xingtao, what do you like?