Prisoner direction

After closing the door, Wen Langxi leaned against the door panel and breathed tremblingly.

What did he do just now, he let Fu Guan go.

Fu Guan's face just now has always been in his mind, the black hair that was neat in the past has become messy, his face is pale, his lips are trembling, and there are tears in those beautiful eyes...

"Snapped!"

Wen Langxi slapped herself hard.

I am crazy.

It turned out to be fierce Fuguan.

"Snapped!"

Another slap, merciless.

After these two slaps, he sat down on the ground as if venting his strength, watching the floor remain motionless.

It took a long time before he stood up, and slowly walked to the black wooden table in the room, which was neatly covered with cigarette packs, picked up a pack, and leaned against the wall beside the table.

Remorse, shame, guilt...

Wen Langxi was tortured by these, and he became more and more painful and tormented.

How to punish himself, how to get out, how to make up for the crime he committed.

Wen Langxi looked at the cigarette case in his hand, took out one without hesitation, and lit it skillfully.

As the flames flickered, he exhaled the pungent smell of tobacco.

He knows what to do, and knowing what to do can wash away his guilt and free him from shame and self-blame...

Looking at the flickering cigarette butts, the whole person was suddenly very relaxed.

Rolling up the sleeves, revealing a scarred arm, including knife wounds, burns, and cigarette scars one after another.

Without any hesitation, he pressed the burning cigarette butt to his arm.

Pain with relief.

……

Fu Guan cooks very quickly, and in a short while the meal and soup are ready. After putting these things into the incubator, he is ready to go upstairs to find Wen Langxi.

Just like before, Fu Guan yelled several times outside the door, but there was no movement inside, the silence was terrifying.

It's not that Wen Langxi doesn't want to see Fu Guan, he really wants to see that person, touch his smooth black hair, and hug him without any gaps.

But now I can't, I have done something wrong to Fu Guan just now, how should I face him?In what capacity should I meet him?

Wen Langxi leaned on the table, holding a cigarette, and rolled up his sleeves. There was a burn mark the size of a corn kernel on his left arm. The wound was slightly sunken and red.

While listening to a soft voice mixed with the coldness outside the door, he smoked a cigarette silently, the smoke was lingering, and he didn't say a word.

The knocking on the door finally disappeared, and Wen Langxi heaved a sigh of relief, but at the same time, he felt an indescribable sense of depression.

Just as he was about to smoke another one, his window rang. After hearing the sound, he saw that Fu Guan downstairs had already set up the ladder and was holding the incubator and was about to climb up.

Wen Langxi was in a hurry, it was too dangerous, he didn't know if the ladder was stable, and the other party was still carrying such a heavy incubator, if he fell halfway, he would have to jump down.

Quickly opened the window and shouted to Fu Guan who was about to climb the ladder: "Stop! Open the door for you, don't do this!"

Hearing this, Fu Guan raised his head and glanced at Wen Langxi, his eyes were bent, he made an OK gesture to him, turned and left.

Seeing that someone was about to come up, Wen Langxi quickly opened the room to force the ventilation to expel the smell of smoke from the room, and at the same time pulled down his sleeves, not wanting the other party to see his arms.

After the smell of smoke in the room has almost dissipated and the heating is exhausted, I quickly turn on the air conditioner and turn on the highest temperature to warm the room quickly.

At this moment, Fu Guan called Langxi softly outside the door.

There was no further delay this time, and the door was opened soon.

The eyes of the two immediately met, Wen Langxi was a little afraid to look at Fu Guan's clear eyes, and said in a low voice: "Why don't you go downstairs to eat, my room is not suitable."

Fu Guan didn't move, he looked at Wen Langxi without blinking, and said after a while, "Don't you like eating in the bedroom with me?"

"No." Wen Langxi replied without thinking.

After finishing speaking, she felt that it was too straightforward, and said again: "I'm afraid that the smell of smoke inside will suffocate you."

"I don't dislike it."

Having said all this, Wen Langxi didn't stop him any more, turned sideways, and let Fu close the door.

As soon as Fu Guan entered, he smelled a faint smell of smoke, it was still the low-quality smoke from last time.

At the same time, I felt that it was a bit cold inside, but I didn't delve into it. I walked to the table naturally, looked at the cigarettes on the table and whispered: "These..."

While talking, he pointed to the table.

Wen Langxi immediately came to his senses. He was about to tidy up, but stopped again, and said, "Can I go to your room? It's too..."

"I want to eat here."

Wen Langxi didn't answer any more, and threw all the cigarettes worth a few dollars into a box, then wiped the table with a wet towel, then took the insulated box from Fu Guan, and put all the food inside on the box. on black wooden table.

The color of the food is very beautiful, instantly reflecting the colorful colors on the originally dark table.

"Eat, I made these."

After these words, the two of them didn't speak any more, and finished the meal quietly.

No blame, no apology.

After eating this meal for a long time, the two seemed to be enjoying this quiet and peaceful time, tacitly understanding each other, and did not mention what happened a few hours ago.

At nine o'clock in the evening, Wen Langxi's door rang again.

It's Fu Guan.

"Langxi, I want to come in and talk to you, is it convenient?"

The reason why Fu Guan chooses to talk to people at night is that the time of night will make people more emotional. Emotions that would not be expressed during the day will be expressed at night.

The door opened slowly, and Wen Langxi was wearing a black bathrobe, standing inside the door and staring at Fu Guan.

Fu Guan was a little stunned. Under the slightly opened collar, he could see the man's plump chest muscles, coupled with his dark skin, it completely gave people a visual impact.

The two stood at the door like this, one looking at the other, without speaking for a long time.

It was Wen Langxi who broke the silence first, "Come in?"

"Ah."

He led someone in, closed the door, and said, "Sit anywhere, even on the bed."

Hearing this, Fu Guan immediately sat down on the wooden chair where the two had dinner in the afternoon, and said calmly, "It doesn't matter, it's fine here."

The corner of Wen Langxi's mouth curled up, but he didn't speak. He leaned against the wall opposite Fu Guan, and the two of them could be five meters apart.

Fu Guan: "..."

"What are you doing standing so far, why don't you sit down?"

Wen Langxi said in a low voice, "I'm afraid you will feel uncomfortable."

Feeling warm in his heart, a smile appeared on Fu Guan's face: "I'm not uncomfortable, just sit here."

Wen Langxi did as he did, and sat down in the bedside area designated by Fu Guan, and the two of them were now only one meter apart.

Before Fu Guan could speak, Wen Langxi looked at Fu Guan seriously, and said solemnly, "I'm sorry during the day, it's my fault."

Hearing this, Fu Guan's eyes behind the glasses softened a lot, "It's okay, I know you didn't mean it."

He wanted to change the subject, and continued, "I have something to ask you."

"Ah."

"What kind of cigarettes are you smoking?"

Wen Langxi looked at Fu Guan and said nothing.

"Lack of money?"

"No shortage."

The two looked at each other for a long time, and Fu Guan said again: "Do you want to redeem your sins in this way?"

After hearing this, Wen Langxi had no expression on his face, and said indifferently: "I just want to smoke."

Fu Guan was silent.

Wen Langxi looked at Fu Guan, and his mind wandered as he watched.

This person is wearing the same black as him today. His is a bathrobe, and the other is pajamas. The neckline of the pajamas is not low, but wide, so that the delicate collarbone can be fully displayed in front of his eyes.

The collarbone is straight, clear and fair, and looking up, it is the man's Adam's apple, protruding but not sharp, smooth and delicate.

Wen Langxi's Adam's apple rolled, and he had to admit that at this moment his heart was moved, he wanted to touch this person, he wanted to draw the perfect arc with his hands, he wanted to bite this person, he wanted to carve himself on this flawless body imprint.

"Brother Fu."

"Huh? Why..." Fu Guan was frightened by this man's fiery eyes, and the feeling from that day came back again. He felt that this man was about to pounce on him, and if he didn't resist, he would definitely bite him like a wolf.

Fu Guanyin resisted the urge to run away, smiled stiffly at Wen Langxi, and didn't say any more.

Wen Langxi also smiled at Fu Guan, and said slowly in that hoarse voice: "You are afraid of me, aren't you?"

Quick answer, "No."

"Then why are you clenching your hands so tightly?"

Fu Guan quickly let go of his hand again, looked at Wen Langxi, and asked, "What are you thinking?"

"Want to know?"

nodded.

"I'm thinking... how can I get you to sit next to me."

"Why do you want me to sit next to you?"

Wen Langxi twitched the corner of his mouth, with a smile in his eyes, "I want to kiss you."

……

These five words made the air between the two freeze.

No matter what, Fu Guan would never have imagined that the person across from him was actually thinking about such a thing in such a situation.

"What are you playing..."

"No kidding."

The air was quiet again.

He obviously came to have a heart-to-heart talk with this person this night, why did the topic suddenly change like this?

"I'm a man, not a woman..."

"I know." After a short pause, he continued, "What about a man or a woman? I think you can be a man or a woman."

"Wen Langxi!"

"Well, what's the matter, am I wrong? Gender is just a name. If a person thinks he is a man, he is a man, and if he wants to be a woman, he is a woman. It all depends on himself, right? Just like when we were just born, who knows Whether you are a man or a woman, if the person who named the gender at the beginning called the current man a woman, then we are all women now. In the same way, we can also be men, it’s just a title, it’s no big deal.”

Fu Guan listened quietly to this person's cognition of gender, and immediately realized that this is a phenomenon of identity disorder, unclear self-image, and distorted cognition of gender. This is a problem that often occurs in BPD patients .

Seeing that Fu Guan was silent, Wen Langxi said again: "Do you think what I said is wrong? Or, how about I ask you a question?"

"Okay, you ask."

"Can you wear lipstick?"

Fu Guan frowned slightly, and said lightly, "Impossible."

"Then can you wear lipstick?"

Before Fu Guan could answer, Wen Langxi said, "Of course you can, but why don't you put on lipstick? Are you afraid that people will laugh at you? Are you afraid that they will criticize you? So you follow them and think you can't wear lipstick, right?"

After a pause, he said again: "Actually, it's possible, everything is possible, but there are too many rules in this society. They divide men and women too clearly, and divide Yin and Yang too clearly. The world of Chu, He and Han, this world is nothing but They divided it for rights, and there is no such boundary on the real land."

"So it's their rule that men can't be with men, isn't it? But why should we listen to them? Who are they?"