all i want is a man

Regarding Kang Yun, things have just begun.

Whether it's pity or liking, Xia Xuechen and Xiao Chuan are starting to get tired of being together again, and it's a bit like being in love with each other.

On a gloomy afternoon, Xiao Chuan received a call from a stranger.

"Xiao Chuan, is that you?" The voice seemed familiar, unfamiliar yet familiar.

"It's me. You are?" Doubt, suspicion.

"Kang Yun." Straight to the point.

"~~"

Kang, cloud.Yes, Kang Yun.Slightly unreal and dizzy.Two familiar and unfamiliar words.

"I'll be waiting for you at ××× tea restaurant." Xiao Chuan was invited.

"~~"

At two o'clock in the afternoon, those who took a nap have not yet woken up, those who have classes have already arrived in the classroom, and those who have nothing to do continue to play their lives, and the lazy Y City seems lifeless.The tea restaurant is located in a side street of the business district of Y city, with classical folk music playing, and the waiters in Chinese-style costumes are friendly and generous.

Kang Yun has a face similar to Xiao Chuan, looking at Kang Yun, Xiao Chuan has the illusion of looking in a mirror in a trance, and he sees himself 20 years later.Kang Yun, the man named Papa in this impression, appeared in front of him very realistically at this moment.There is no imagined vicissitudes and decadence, unlike the rumored promise, black stand-up collar jacket, dark red knitted sweater, dark blue straight jeans, brown nubuck leather shoes, casual, simple, clean and neat.

"Xiao Chuan! It's really you! Xiao Chuan, Dad misses you so much. Not bad~~ so good~~" As soon as we met, Kang Yun went up and down, back and forth, left and right, earnestly and carefully Xiao Chuan read it a lot, and praised his masterpiece from time to time.

"Why do you have my mobile phone number?" Be vigilant like Xiao Chuan.

"Don't be angry, Xiao Chuan. I saw it on a missing person notice. At that time, I saw someone looking for me. The contact person on it was Mr. Xiao, and the phone number belonged to City Y. I guessed that this The person must be you." Kang Yun answered seriously with satisfaction, just like a serious and obedient student answering the teacher's question with satisfaction and enthusiasm.

Looking at the man in front of him, thinking about what Liu Yun said, Xiao Chuan still wanted to confirm it.

"Why did you leave that year?"

"Xiao Chuan, don't get angry, just listen to me." Kang Yun took a sip of Ceylon black tea.

"Back then, a woman named Liu Yun lied to me that she was pregnant with my child and even lost her job. Considering that she had no fixed place to live and didn't even have a job, I wanted to take responsibility for myself. Xiao Chuan, you Don't blame Dad. I also hate you and your mother. However, your mother's job is fairly stable, and she has a house, so she can be considered well-fed. When you grow up, she will have someone to rely on, so you won't have to live without someone to take care of you At that time, I felt that Liu Yun needed me more than you. As a man, I cannot be irresponsible."

Kang Yun didn't continue, and that's all he said, his tone was calm, but tears were silently gathering.

"and then?"

"The later story is too ridiculous." Kang Yun blinked his eyes to calm down his emotions.

"Later, I accidentally learned that Liu Yun was not pregnant at all. She was lying to me! This vicious woman! At that time, I had completely separated from you. I knew that I would have no face to return to you. However, if I want to live with a liar with a vicious heart, I absolutely can’t do it! On the night when I learned the truth, I resolutely moved out of Liu Yun’s house. That’s No. 20 when I left you and my mother God." A bitter smile flickered across the corner of Kang Yun's mouth.

"and after?"

"On the second day after I left Liu Yun, I mustered up the courage to go back to the home that I miss deeply. I remember very clearly that day was July [-], [-]. It was a cloudy day, and your mother was haggard. I still remember the face. She blocked me from the door and denounced my crime hoarsely. I knelt outside the house and begged her to let me come back to you. I saw blood and tears in her eyes. But she still refused Killed me." Kang Yun broke down in tears.

Xiao Chuan said nothing for a long time, and stopped sobbing. Kang Yun continued to whisper: "Later, I was outside alone, wandering alone. I have been to many places, changed many jobs, met many people, and encountered many things. But , in my heart, I think about you and my mother all the time, and I don’t want to go back to you all the time. I blame myself every day and work hard. I only hope that one day I can return to my hometown and return to you, and ask for your forgiveness. Although, I know that I am delusional. Every time I dream back in the middle of the night, I can hear you behind me, chasing me, calling my father. Xiao Chuan, father is sorry for you. I am sorry for you and mother. I am sorry~~I am sorry~~I Not a good dad. I deserve it~~"

"One thing, I have to tell you clearly. At first, Liu Yun lied to you. But later, she was really pregnant. Your child is Xiaoxue. I still have something to do, you can do it yourself." Xiao Chuan said The tone is cold.

Pain is never cold.

From seeing Kang Yun to now, Xiao Chuan's indifference and calmness have made Kang Yun intimidated.

Halt a taxi and do a quick flash in.Xiao Chuan's vision became blurred.The tears were dripping down, and they couldn't stop, they couldn't stop at all.He thought he wouldn't cry, he thought he was indifferent enough.However, he knew that he needed a father.

Every time he wakes up in the middle of the night, how much he hopes that the man called Dad can appear beside him in time, defend him, encourage him, give him strength, and teach him to be brave.

In this world, there is no child who does not wish to have a father.Even though he may have all kinds of bad habits and problems, even though he may be just one of thousands of ordinary fathers who can no longer be ordinary, even though he may have never done a decent thing , even though he always likes to control, nag, and even beat and scold.However, even if it is restraint, even nagging, even beating and scolding, it is full of love. The person called Dad can't learn to be tricky, but he is always willing to give everything he can All given unselfishly.

It is true that Xiao Chuan also thought about concealing the fact that Liu Yun was pregnant and let Kang Yun return to him.

In the past 12 years, Xiao Ping suppressed his longing, and never showed his nostalgia and longing for Kang Yun in front of Xiao Chuan. However, the cabinet in the study room at home was full of memories of her and this man named Kang Yun.For his mother, for himself, and for his family, Xiao Chuan wished so much that he was ruthless and unintentional.

However, he still chose to speak out.I need a father, and so does Xiaoxue.Happiness cannot be bought by force, and concealment will only speed up the rupture.If you don't say it, one day, when Kang Yun learns that Liu Yun is pregnant, he may still fearlessly shoulder his responsibilities as he did 12 years ago.The pain of gaining and losing is far greater than the hopelessness of not getting it.

It's good to say it out loud, frankly.So, what about that guy?Maybe, he should be told.

Sometimes in life, you need to be brave, to love bravely, to hate bravely, and then, to forget bravely and move forward bravely.

- Yibei

The author has something to say: I have been working part-time recently, and the writing is not very regular~~~