bad derailment

When I got home, it was already a whole hour longer than the original 'two 10 minutes'.

I changed into my slippers and put Ganmao Ling on the coffee table.Chen Feng was curled up on the sofa with his back facing the door, I went over and squatted down, shook his shoulders, and was stunned by the scorching skin of my palm through the thin fabric, before I remembered to make a sound.

"Chen Feng, wake up."

His sleep has always been light, and he opened his eyes almost the second I bumped into him.The black and white eyeballs revealed a rare fragility and sleepiness, and the hoarse voice was nasal, "...Didn't you say 10 minutes?"

"I've been waiting for you for a long time."

I suddenly felt guilty, and after a moment of silence, I explained softly.

"Sorry, I was delayed by something on the road. I bought medicine and a thermometer. You sit up and take your temperature first."

Chen Feng lowered his eyes and emphasized in a muffled voice: "I'm not sick."

I ignored the resistance, put the thermometer into his mouth, and said half coaxingly: "I didn't say you were sick, just measure it just in case, keep it in your mouth and don't drop it."

He didn't seem to react. He sat up listlessly holding the thermometer in his mouth, shaking his head little by little.This look of drooping head is much cuter than usual.

A few minutes later, I looked up to read the number on the thermometer, and sighed as I expected.

"You have a fever."

Chen Feng was sick, and once a person who never got sick fell down, he had a fever of 39 degrees.

I vaguely guessed the reason, "Did you fall asleep on the sofa again last night?"

"Ah."

Chen Feng answered frankly and confidently.I didn't know how to speak, so I could only tell him to remember to go back to the room and sleep for the first time.

He responded in a low voice, not knowing if he listened or not.

The cold medicine I bought didn't help, so I rummaged through boxes and cabinets and finally found a box of antipyretics.Chen Feng's spirit relaxed, and he was slowly burning up. I poured a glass of water and helped him into the bedroom. As soon as I was about to get up, he tightly held onto the hem of his clothes, and he refused to let go no matter what.

"Don't go."

He was lying on the bed, holding me stubbornly with one hand.His voice was hoarse, and he repeated two words from his throat: "Don't go."

Like a wolf cub who is afraid of being abandoned by his master.This metaphor popped out of my mind somehow.

"Okay, I won't go, you take the medicine first."

I could only sit back and put the fever-reducing medicine into Feng Chen's mouth.He frowned in resistance, and spat out the medicine, which happened three times in a row. I was a little impatient, and couldn't help but increase my tone.

"Be obedient, take medicine to get better, if you vomit again, I will..."

I couldn't think of a reason why the threatening voice stopped here.Unexpectedly, Chen Feng repeated his old tricks and resisted weakly, "It's so bitter, I won't eat it."

There was a trace of grievance in the words that he didn't realize.

Facing Chen Feng like this, it was hard for me to become aggressive again. After struggling for a while, I resigned myself to taking a sip of water, then quickly stuffed the pill into Chen Feng's mouth, squeezed his chin and forced myself to cross the water.

The lips, hot with the fever, seemed softer.He swallowed the pill without any resistance, and stared at me blankly. I seemed to be fascinated by a ghost, and after a brief separation, I lowered my head and kissed him on the lips.

"..."

"Xiao Yao, I want more."

Chen Feng paused for a few seconds before he realized it. He raised his neck and continued to kiss him while speaking.I turned away shyly, and the kiss landed on my cheek, but soon he shifted his target, bit my lips accurately, and poked his tongue in again.

I hesitated for a while, but still didn't reach out and push it away.

Compared to Chen Feng's usual forceful kisses without explanation, I like his cautious and tentative appearance better, even his heart beats a few beats faster.By the time I realized it, I was already half-sitting on his lap, and both breaths were kissing disorderly.

He looked at me, his flushed cheeks didn't know whether it was from the burn or something else.

I scolded myself for being able to handle even an unconscious patient.Then he pretended to be calm and got off Chen Feng, took a chair and sat beside the bed.He was a few seconds late before he quickly grabbed my wrist and squeezed it hard, as if he was afraid that I would run away.

"Don't you kiss?"

Chen Feng was probably confused, he looked at me helplessly, he didn't know what he was talking about, and there was even a trace of disappointment in his tone.

I almost couldn't maintain the composure on my face, "We'll talk about it when you recover."

He couldn't wait to answer: "I'm ready."

"Does your head still hurt?"

"pain."

"Is it still hot?"

"hot."

I ruthlessly denied him, "That's not good, keep lying down."

Chen Feng blinked, gave a low 'oh', and then really took a break, lying motionless on the bed and looking at me.After a few minutes like this, I finally couldn't help but speak.

"What are you staring at me for?"

Chen Feng paused for a moment, and then said slowly: "Because I don't have the chance to look at you like this usually."

I was taken aback, not quite understanding, "What?"

These two words seemed to have opened Chen Feng's vent. He looked into my eyes and said word by word: "You come back very late every day, either working overtime or having dinner with colleagues, every time I want to talk to you You don't even talk to me. I know you're busy, but I just want you to spare a little time with me, just a little bit, it's so difficult."

I opened my mouth, but didn't know what to say.

"We don't have much time to be together, and you have to go out to accompany others to have dinner for birthday. If you don't reply to the message or answer the phone, I can't even compare to a colleague in your heart. You are just... Don't care about me."

The more Chen Feng said, the more wronged he became, his voice trembled.I was afraid of his complaints, so I quickly comforted him, "Don't think about it, of course I care about you. I will pay attention to what you said in the future, okay?"

"Xiao Yao, are you tired of being with me?"

"No, how is it possible..."

But it was already too late, Chen Feng's tears flowed down the red eye sockets onto the pillow, making my whole heart wet. After sighing, I stretched out my hand to gently wipe it off for him.

The lethality of any weapon is not as great as this drop of tears. I only know that Chen Feng is almost paranoid and wants to control me, but I never thought that he would also have such a wronged and fragile mood.

He said a lot more, mostly secrets that I didn't even know.Soon, the voice of confiding gradually died down, and the sound of even breathing covered the silence of the room.Looking at Chen Feng's profile, I realized that I hadn't looked at him like this for a long time.

Even the only time he could remember was the night five years ago, when Chen Feng was lying weakly on the hospital bed like this, talking nonsense.I stood where I was and watched him being wheeled into the operating room.The red light came on, and loud noises accompanied by a few blurred ghost images twisted and rotated in front of my eyes.Leaning against the white wall of the hospital, I wiped my face slowly, only to realize that tears were streaming down my face at some point.

Those were the longest eight hours of my life.I don't know how I got through it, and how I went back in a daze.Awakened countless times in my dream, I stood next to Chen Feng's fallen body, almost losing the consciousness of being a human being.The blinding red reminds me of what happened, and I'd rather be deaf and dumb and not see it.

"Will he die?"

The doctor said: "No, the operation is considered a success. If there is no accident, the patient will wake up soon, but regarding his left leg, you have to be mentally prepared."

I found myself starting to get confused, "...what left leg?"

"The patient's left knee was stabbed and his thigh was also stabbed twice. When he was sent here, he had lost too much blood and was almost in shock. We tried our best to keep that leg, but we will still be disabled. You can no longer do strenuous exercise."

There was buzzing in my ears, as if I was listening to the most obscure language in the world.

"Disability," I heard myself almost crying, "is there no hope at all?"

The doctor shook his head, "Sorry, we did our best."

I stood at the door of Chen Feng's ward for a long time that day.I think of the day when the accident happened, he squeezed my hand hard, repeated a sentence all the way in half-consciousness, until now I can clearly recall his voice and breathing rhythm, everything, I remember.

"Xiao Yao, don't be afraid."

He looked at me deeply, every word was weak but firm.

"I will protect you."

"I will protect you."

"I will protect you."

......

I shook my head, only to realize that I did not know when to describe Chen Feng's facial features.The medicine worked, and he slept soundly.I somehow recalled such a long time ago, but suddenly realized that it seems that I have never given him a definite answer.

I moved the corner of my mouth helplessly, and sighed in a low voice: "Fool, who wants you to protect me?"