bad derailment

Strictly speaking, this is the second time Gu Mingsheng and I have kissed.

Ten years apart, it seems that everything is different, but the overwhelming throbbing in my heart is still so real, no matter it is ten years ago or ten years later.

For a moment, I even thought that Gu Mingsheng liked me.

I almost laughed out loud when the thought came to me, how is this possible?

Perhaps ten years ago, when I was a kid, Gu Mingsheng responded to me with such a gesture, which would have made me so excited that I couldn't tell the difference between east, west, and north, and I surrendered directly to express my heart, without caring about the consequences.

But now, I have changed from a young boy to an adult who has to worry about all aspects.The status of emotion has plummeted, replaced by rationality, consequences, and inexplicable pros and cons...Once there are more things to consider, love is no longer pure and joyful, but it makes me feel a little scared , apprehensive.

Whether it's cowardly or escaping, I didn't send any more messages to Gu Mingsheng, just like unilaterally erasing the memory of that night, and I hope that Gu Mingsheng will not say a word about it.

Although this expectation is not pure, and it is mixed with some emotions that I don't understand, but I think it is the best choice to let this matter stop here.

But Gu Mingsheng lost the tacit understanding with me for the first time, and did not follow the routine.

He sent a text message the next day with only three words: Sorry.

He didn't pretend to be amnesia after drinking, and he didn't pretend to be a joke. He sent this apology in a serious tone that I am most unaccustomed to.

For his loss of control last night, and for the kiss after the loss of control.

When I received this text message, my eyes went blank for a few seconds.Afterwards, he wanted to open Gu Mingsheng's mind to see if there was something wrong with it, or if he hadn't fully sobered up from the wine.It wasn't until Zhao Quan called out to remind me that I didn't realize that the phone screen had been automatically blacked out after a long time.

I didn't turn it on again, put the phone aside, and chose to pretend that I didn't see anything.

This is not good when two people get too close.

I'm already used to Gu Mingsheng's nonchalant and frivolous attitude, and I'm also used to his usual flirtatious behavior.I attributed all these to his personality and pranks, but when he really chose to make the ambiguity real, I didn't know how to face it.

Zhao Quan saw that I was in a low mood, so he left space, and discussed the New Year's Eve activities with his colleagues in the past, and the atmosphere was very lively.

Even after the old year is over, the remaining problems will still carry over to the new year.Everything will not pass away easily because of time. I understand this truth, but I still choose the most shameful escape.

Gu Mingsheng didn't insist on asking me for an answer anymore, and this matter seemed to be gradually shelved as it appeared on the surface.

The day before New Year's Eve, I received a text message from He Jin.

Before I opened it, I could vaguely guess what was inside.Sure enough, He Jin wanted to invite a few friends to hold a New Year's Eve party together, sing songs and watch movies until the early morning, and asked if I would like to come together.

The first thing I thought of was whether there was Ren Han on this trip, and after considering it, I politely refused him, and He Jin didn't force it.

For these activities, I have never been interested in actively participating.Although I can be regarded as a half-young man, since I was a child, I have been told that Old Chen is used to it. Over time, I am also used to such an ordinary life style, but Chen Feng is an accident.

He likes this emerging festival, and he would talk to me about it every day.On anniversaries similar to Valentine's Day, he would also send flowers and gifts like ordinary boyfriends, or take me out on dates.

No one doesn't like romance, although I'm not keen on it, but I also like to see the look in his eyes full of anticipation when he gives me a gift. I find him more interesting than the gift.

It's just that I don't have a good memory, and every time I return a gift, I only remember it when Chen Feng pesters me.He would be very happy no matter what he gave, he said ugly but turned around and put it away quietly, duplicity.

Whenever I see Chen Feng like this, I will secretly swear that I will give him a better gift next time, but every time the next time comes, I will forget it again.

Over time, over and over again.

He can be with me like this for five years, and sometimes I admire him very much.

On New Year's Eve night, the temperature dropped below zero.Under Chen Feng's repeated requests, I had no choice but to get up and change clothes, and reluctantly accompanied him out.

In my opinion, this kind of weather is most suitable for lying in bed, reading a book and watching TV.Facing the cold wind outside, even listening to Chen Feng whispering in his ear about the appointment process waiting for the meeting, he felt a little bit of interest.

I'm an old man, what's a good date?I can only slander this sentence silently in my heart.

Chen Feng's temper looked cold and hard, but there was a little girl's vigor in his bones.Whatever I say, he can answer three sentences, and as time goes by, I don't bother to express my opinions anymore, just let him be happy.

"Did you hear what I just said?"

Chen Fengyin's unpleasant words sounded in my ears, and I shuddered and recovered from my fugue, "What? Say it again, I'm sure to listen well this time."

His temper is always easy to figure out, and he will put everything on his face, leaving nothing behind.

After hearing what I said, Chen Feng slightly loosened his frowning eyebrows, "I just asked where you want to go for dinner? It's a bit cold, so it's better to have something hot for dinner."

"You also know that it's cold today?" I whispered before saying, "I want to eat hot pot."

Chen Feng also knew that he was in the wrong, so he put aside his face and replied a short 'yes'.

The streets tonight are full of couples and happy shops. Everyone has a smile on their faces and the joy of entering the new year.Such emotions infected me unconsciously, and my mood did not start to complain like that.

A hand suddenly wrapped around my shoulder, I looked at Chen Feng who was not looking sideways, pretended not to notice the tension on his face, and said jokingly: "Just walk, don't move your hands or feet."

But after finishing speaking, he didn't shake off his hand.

Chen Feng snorted softly, his pitch-black pupils were like thick ink that couldn't be melted, and under the gaze at this moment, he let out a rare tenderness, but he still said reluctantly: "I can't even hug my boyfriend. Yet?"

The inexplicable look in his eyes made me flustered, maybe the love inside was too strong, a throbbing warm current spread from the limbs eroded by the cold air, it was so hot that I wanted to escape, but I couldn't resist this tempting temptation no matter what. gentle.

I think I don't love Chen Feng, but when a person bears such a clear and heavy preference from another person, maybe no one can be indifferent.

That trace of shallow liking hidden in the depths spread to the maximum under the catalysis of tonight.

At least at this moment, I don't want to think about those miscellaneous relationships and past events, I just want to spend the night with Chen Feng well, and bid farewell to this not-so-bad old year when I wake up.

Only at this moment, I will really fall into the love weaved by Chen Feng, as if I and him are really lovers who have been in love for many years, there is no gap, and we depend on each other.

When I came out of the hot pot restaurant, it was already dark all night.The street was still bustling, and Chen Feng's hand on my shoulder shifted down unknowingly, and instead held my palm, and then interlocked his fingers.

Maybe it was because after eating and drinking, I was too lazy to move, I only made a symbolic move, and then I was pulled even tighter by Chen Feng.

"Don't make trouble."

"There's going to be trouble."

I couldn't help laughing.

Passers-by looked over frequently, but most of them were friendly or curious.I pretended not to see it, and was dragged into a movie theater by Chen Feng. The hall was full of young people who came to celebrate the new year, and the sweet smell of popcorn filled the air.

I shook Chen Feng's hand and asked him, "Can you buy tickets for so many people?"

Chen Feng raised his eyebrows, and his tone was a little smug, "Who is as unprepared as you, I have already bought tickets online."

I saw Chen Feng's childish expression begging for compliments, and couldn't resist reaching out to touch his buttocks.His hair grew quickly, and within a month it became fluffy again, and it was very comfortable to hold in the palm of his hand, like smoothing the hair of some kind of large dog.

"Okay, you are the most thoughtful, go get the tickets first, what time does the movie start?"

"There are still ten minutes..."

Before he could finish speaking, an unexpected and familiar male voice suddenly interspersed in his ear: "Lin Yao?"

I turned back together with Chen Feng, my eyes flicked across the sullen Ren Han like an electric shock, and I shuddered slightly.

Bad thoughts floated up and down, and my erratic eyes finally stayed on He Jin's face full of surprise. After hesitating for a few seconds, I still put on a smile.

"...What a coincidence."

How so unfortunate.