bad derailment

This farce did not come to an end after Chen Feng left.

Jiang Qiushi no longer cared about the water-dropped hair, stared at me calmly, and opened his lips after the silence: "Does he often come to you recently?"

This question didn't imply any blame, but it made it hard for me to breathe, and I didn't dare to meet his eyes.

"He only came a few times, but I stopped him all of them. This time it was an accident."

Even I can hardly believe this far-fetched rhetoric, let alone Jiang Qiushi, who has always been able to see people's hearts.

He nodded lightly, lowering his eyes as if he understood something.When he looked at me again, he restrained his fluctuations, and said softly, "I see, don't open the door again next time, he seems emotionally unstable, and I'm worried that he might hurt you."

"......it is good."

I replied hesitantly, waiting in fear for Jiang Qiushi's next question.But he seemed to have finished asking all he wanted to say, and raised his hand to wipe his wet hair again.

Seeing that I was still in a daze, Jiang Qiushi turned his head and smiled faintly, "I didn't find the hair dryer just now, do you know where it is?"

He naturally changed the topic, as if he had withdrawn his thoughts from the dramatic scene just now.I followed his words in a daze and took out the hair dryer until I lay down on the bed after taking a shower, Jiang Qiushi didn't ask any more questions about Chen Feng.

Is it because you already guessed it, or because you don't care?

I tossed and turned, these two reasons were actually a bit unacceptable, I felt an unreal feeling of tightness in my chest, and I couldn't explain why.After the lights went down, Jiang Qiushi's steady breathing fluctuated in the darkness, but I knew he wasn't asleep, just like me, fell into a struggling and silent situation.

He can always hide his emotions very well, but I can't hide it.

"Don't you have anything to ask about the matter just now?"

After a long time, maybe just a few minutes, I heard my own voice ringing in my ears, slightly muffled against the pillow.

The people around him moved, and this slight movement could not help expanding and vivid in the darkness.I froze for a moment, and Jiang Qiushi's temperature came from behind, with the same shower gel fragrance as mine, a nice mint scent.

"Lin Yao, I believe in you."

His voice was not heavy, and he breathed lightly and hotly on the side of his neck.

This sentence broke into my ears as if it weighed a thousand catties, and it weighed heavily on my heart, and I couldn't breathe for a while.

I am glad that when my back is facing Jiang Qiu at this moment, I can have enough time to suppress the leaked embarrassment.He shouldn't have noticed anything strange, he was silent for a moment, and his voice was mixed with an inaudible sigh, full of depression.

"Actually, what Chen Feng said is not wrong. I did do something wrong, and I don't deserve to be a teacher."

"He said all angry words," I retorted without thinking, my chest throbbed, "Chen Feng doesn't understand you at all, so don't take his words to heart."

"I know," Jiang Qiushi said, and was quiet for a few seconds, "I just suddenly remembered that someone once said similar things to me."

"Who?"

"my parents."

"them......"

I paused just in time, the things I wanted to ask seemed inappropriate to speak.In the end, it was replaced by a sentence full of comfort: "It's all over."

Such words are a little weak.Jiang Qiushi's breath brushed his earlobe numbly, and said softly: "You don't have to worry anymore, I'm not as fragile as you think, you can ask if you want."

I moved my lips, hesitated for a few seconds and said, "Your parents, don't they support you as a teacher?"

Jiang Qiushi calmed down, maybe he was organizing his words, and when he spoke again, he spoke with subtle heaviness: "Well, they have always hoped that I can study abroad, get a diploma that is shining in the eyes of outsiders, and get a high-paying job. Such a life Only then can it be considered successful and perfect. So after the college entrance examination, they tampered with my volunteers privately, and threatened with a cold war in a familiar way, and in the end, I chose to compromise."

I was a little speechless, maybe it was because he was too close, and I almost felt an empathetic pain stuck in my chest.

"and after?"

"After I returned to China, they hoped that I could apply for the company according to the original plan. But fortunately, my father was diagnosed with advanced liver cancer at that time, and the doctor said he would not live for a few years."

Jiang Qiushi narrated in a calm voice, and there was an unreasonable coldness in the darkness.I trembled subconsciously, he seemed to have sensed something, he surrounded my body from behind, and played a soft voice against his ear, as if he had changed back to the indifferent Jiang Qiushi.

"I fulfilled my duty as a child by giving him the best medicine and hiring the most expensive nurses. It was because his life was not good enough that he left after half a year. I didn't see him again until he passed away. One glance."

The chest pressed against the back conveyed warm breath, but the breath sprinkled on the side of the neck was unusually cold.

"Lin Yao, do you think I'm cruel?" Jiang Qiushi's breathing was slightly tight, as if he was struggling uncontrollably, "Actually, I am very grateful for the disease. It took away my father and gave me freedom. Even a very short period of freedom was enough for me at that time."

"No, it's not your fault, you didn't do anything wrong."

I held his hand, turned around and met Jiang Qiushi's eyes that were sunken in the darkness, the rhythm was rarely out of sync, watching me trembling unceasingly.A part of my heart softened, and I lowered my voice: "You have done a good job. No one can handle these things as well as you do. You have said it yourself, all these things are in the past. Yes, I will still be by your side for a long time to come."

Maybe it was a certain word in this sentence that touched Jiang Qiu, he slowly tightened his grip on my palm, with the same heavy and depressing tone at the moment: "If one day, I do something that will never be forgiven What about the matter?"

I didn't quite understand, so I subconsciously asked, "What kind of thing?"

He was silent for a long time, his lips moved slightly, and he uttered a sentence: "I'm just making a hypothesis. Lin Yao, if there is such a day, will you choose to forgive me?"

Jiang Qiushi never makes meaningless assumptions.He habitually takes all aspects of things into consideration, as if out of psychological obsessive-compulsive disorder, he does not allow anyone to tell him what to do, and he will not jump out of the frame beyond reality and cross the boundaries he set for himself.

I hesitated for a moment, but in this short silence, the light in Jiang Qiushi's eyes flickered, as if there were countless words on the verge of coming out, but they were restrained and hidden in the silent darkness.

He lowered his eyes, and his calm voice had returned to normal: "Sorry, I shouldn't have asked that question."

For a moment, I realized that I didn't understand Jiang Qiushi, just like I never understood anyone.

He said something more, his voice gradually lowered.I didn't listen to it, and his assumption just now echoed in my mind-if one day, Jiang Qiushi really did something that touched the bottom line, what would I do?

I don't know what this 'bottom line' refers to, and why Jiang Qiushi did this, suddenly bursts of panic and fear almost swallowed me up.I was full of confusion and tried hard to think about countermeasures, but fell into a deep dream in this confusion.

The scene in the dream was bizarre, strange and familiar, it seemed to flash across Chen Feng's slumped face before he left, and Jiang Qiushi's soft words beside him.His lips opened and closed, not knowing what he was saying to me, I reached out to grab him, but the dream woke me up.

Jiang Qiushi was sleeping peacefully beside me, his chest heaving and breathing steadily, conveying a distinct temperature and existence within my reach.

I looked at his slightly tired sleeping face, suppressed the strange palpitations, and couldn't sleep again in the second half of the night.