Fall Mu

Lin Mu's diary started from the time he lost his parents. He didn't write it every day, but when there were emotions or important things, he would make two more entries here.

[Today is 56 days since my parents left. Their insurance money has not been paid yet. I have no money to pay the rent and was kicked out by the landlord. I took some important belongings and now I am with beggars under the overpass. It stinks and makes me feel like throwing up.But in two days, maybe the smell on my body will make others feel sick.I was very scared, so I kept writing, as if if I wrote more words, I would not be eaten by monsters.I don't know if I will die in a few days, but I don't want to die.The irony is that I have become a tramp before I have become a tramp painter. 】

There is a picture below, which is a Q-version child with big rabbit ears, squatting on the ground with his ears curled up under the bridge.

[I hope that like in the comics, an angel descends from the sky and takes me away from this dirty place.I am willing to give my body.

The accompanying picture is an angel with wings, stretching out its hand like a little rabbit on the ground. 】

[Today is the vernal equinox, but there is no spring in my life anymore.I was wrong, I don't want to be a wandering painter, I just want to have a home.Even if it's just a shelter from the wind and rain.But I don't think there will be an angel to save me.No one cares about my life or death. 】No picture.

[It's been ten days, my already dirty parents can't recognize me, I'm already dirtier than that beggar, with my body, no one would want me even if I promised myself, right?Those beggars bathe with the water in the moat, but I dare not.

It would be great if I couldn't wake up again when I fell asleep next time, then I would be really relieved. 】

The accompanying picture is of a sleeping rabbit, not a child with bunny ears.

【My angel has appeared! ! ! 】

The accompanying picture is a little angel quickly outlined with a few lines.

[I was so happy a few days ago that I was so immersed in happiness that I didn't have time to record it.These days, unknowingly, recording life has become a habit, it has nothing to do, and I will keep recording when I have time.Talk about the angel who picked me up from hell a few days ago.

His name is Shu Yang, and he was my childhood playmate.He went to a big city to study when he was very young, but he would come back to me every winter and summer vacation.I'm a relatively rough person, I can play with anyone, and I didn't deliberately remember it.Now it’s not winter and summer vacation, but he came back and found me. He took me back to his home, turned on warm hot water to bathe me, cut my hair, shaved my beard, and I finally washed and smelled delicious , also have a place to sleep, I am no longer a beggar.

Shu Yang's parents also work in big cities and rarely come back. The two of us are relatively free.I asked him why he came back suddenly, but he smiled and didn't answer, maybe he came back on purpose after hearing about me.But no matter whether it is deliberate or not, it is my benefactor.When I wanted to give up living, he warmed my heart like a ray of sunshine in the morning. 】

The accompanying picture is a picture of a sunrise.

Even if it's just a pencil drawing, a master like Gu Mingxuan who is used to admiring famous paintings can still feel the warmth in it.Every picture of Lin Mu has a soul, and even when despair reaches the bottom, there is still an energy of not admitting defeat.Gu Mingxuan gave this sunrise picture a name called Salvation.He knew that Lin Mu would not choose to die because of staying under the overpass for a few more days, but he would be unforgettable because of this early rescue.It is an indescribable feeling.Gu Mingxuan suddenly became angry with Shu Yang. At least Shu Yang was the one who gave Lin Mu sunshine. He suddenly wanted to see the future development without any emotion. As a bystander, he just wanted to know.

[I got my parents' insurance money, although it is pitifully small, but I am lucky to be able to get the money alive.I was not willing to spend casually, but I took out some to treat Shu Yang to a good meal.Afterwards he scolded me and told me not to spend money indiscriminately.Recently, I asked him many times why he didn't go back to school, but he kept hemming and evading his words. I thought there must be something wrong with me, maybe I was too narcissistic. 】

The accompanying picture is a shy rabbit covering its face, its big ears drooping in front of its face, covering its eyes.

[I don't know if I'm too sensitive, but I always feel that Shu Yang looks at me strangely, his eyes are deep and hot, like looking at a long-lost lover, but I'm not a little girl, I'm probably too narcissistic. 】

【God, gosh, oh, mygod, Shu Yang actually confessed his love to me. He said he liked me since he was a child. He forgot how young he was. Anyway, do you still like me even though I am a man?What should I do, should I run?But he couldn't leave him. 】

[I haven't talked to him for two days. It's not that I don't want to talk to him, but I really don't know what to do.I always thought I liked girls. 】

【Shu Yang suddenly told me that he was going back to school. When he turned around, I was reluctant and held him back. As a result, he turned around and kissed me. His lips were warm and sweet.Before I could react, he panicked and started apologizing to me, looking like he was about to kneel down for me.I actually thought he was a little cute, so I wanted to tease him.I asked him that both of us are men, so whoever gets on and who gets off.Unexpectedly, he misunderstood that I agreed, saying that he was the one below, and hoped that someone would love him, and then he limply leaned against my arms.I was a little scared, so I pushed him away suddenly, and said something to make me think again.Now that I think about it, I don't know if that push broke his heart.I care about him very much, very much, and I don't want to lose him.But although I'm stupid and don't understand anything, I know that I don't have a heart for him, and I never will, but I have a strong heartache and soft heart.I gave him my first kiss, should I promise him? 】

[Xiao Shuyang was very courageous, and even attacked my lips while I was sleeping. I was in a daze, but unexpectedly turned over and pressed on him, restraining his hands and pressing them on top of my head, giving him a mess Kissing, the saliva of both of them mixed together, feeling dirty, he wanted to do anything else, but I stopped him because I was fully awake.I feel that he is like a frightened rabbit, with red eyes, looking at me pitifully, his eyes full of indelible love.Um?What did I just say?like?How old am I, how do I know about love and love, I must be talking nonsense.In fact, I just want to live a good life.For him, he is more like a relative, especially during the time when my parents passed away, the warmth he gave me is irreplaceable.No blood is better than blood. 】