Complete Guidebook

Shen Yayu is a selfish person.So he actually hates Lu Zhe saying the word about death... Obviously, as a doctor, he should understand the value of life better, right?

Because he didn't want Lu Zhe to die, so he hated it.

In fact, it's not that he doesn't want to be honest, it's just that he can't be honest with himself.He didn't know how to face Lu Zhe... Originally, he wanted to paint him black, but he was merciful everywhere.But let go...but I can't do it myself.

At the beginning, I was moved by the slightest warmth.He is a person who will not suppress himself, since the little white rabbit bumped into him, there is no reason not to drag it away.Afterwards, Lu Zhe's every move also made him very concerned. Whether it was the entanglement during the day or the interest at night, it proved that he cared a lot.

Soon, Lu Zhe ran away.It's just that he didn't run very far and was caught again... He felt that he appreciated it, after all, he also tried his best to escape from those people back then.But in his heart, there was some anger and disappointment... Angry at Lu Zhe's misbehavior, he wanted to leave him in a vain way. He thought that Lu Zhe could be regarded as his own.

But he was a little disappointed that he was captured so easily without any challenge... When the warmth on his body gradually disappeared, the hatred that replaced it didn't seem to have much explosive power.

So, he decided to punish him.I made a decision during the day, and I won't be merciful anymore... So I want to lock him in a cage, and even brand him.If you don't listen, throw it away...

But then, one thing after another, it was like a train derailed.There is no warning, but there are traces to follow.

This confused him, but before he had time to figure it out, he saw a side of Lu Zhe that he had never shown before...wildness and passion.

I always felt that he was too soft before, and sometimes gentleness is not all a good thing.But it turns out that he not only has the advantage of being warm and gentle...he can also endure, explode, fight, and bite like a wild beast to vent his anger and unwillingness.

But the sudden confession turned into a lonely beast that could only be forced to lick its wounds alone.Self-willed, yet humble.

Unknowingly, I was drawn by one thread after another, and then followed.Just fell in love like that... So I couldn't bear it, I wanted to let go, but I couldn't bear it.

It made him painful, yet unnaturally excited.

Because he knew that he was not worthy, because he knew that he was longing...so after turning into self-torture to himself, he added it to Lu Zhe.As long as he thought that maybe he was in the same pain as himself, he couldn't help but tremble with excitement.

But it was also because of him that the daytime him and the nighttime him gradually began to merge.Gradually less madness and more rationality.Gradually, there is less rationality and more madness.

Because you understand, let go.Because I understand, I am even more reluctant to let go.

Selfishly entangled, enjoying it like a pervert... Sometimes I even think, it's okay to go on like this.

But Lu Zhe will not give him another chance to escape.

Lu Zhe's face was a little distorted, and he grabbed Shen Yayu's wrist stubbornly and asked for an answer: "Say it! Why can't you tell me! Why! Why do you always choose for me, why...why do you..."

Maybe Lu Zhe himself realized the ridiculousness of his question, and his voice gradually dropped.Then he clenched his fingers slightly, and let them go silently.

Shen Yayu was actually quite entangled and tormented in his heart, so after Lu Zhe let go, he was a little startled for a while, then turned his head slightly and looked at Lu Zhe in a daze.

Lu Zhe suddenly smiled.

There is a warm dimple hanging from the corner of the mouth, and the curved arc is as warm as ever.It's just that those eyes that should have been brighter and warmer, but there is a strong sadness in them.

He was obviously smiling, but because of the uncontrollable tears falling down, he was a little colder and colder, like a drowned rat who had been bullied miserably, pitiful, I don't know why he was pitiful.

"Forget it, you won't answer if I ask you. It's good... Anyway, my injury is almost healed, it's time to leave, and I will move out tomorrow." Lu Zhe twitched the corners of his mouth again, but his face was because of The cold wind was blowing and it was a little stiff.

This time, it was his turn to turn around and leave.

The momentary pull when turning around made Lu Zhe laugh at Shen Yayu's naivety, but the smile at the corner of his mouth was unspeakably bitter.

Shen Yayu's feelings for Lu Zhe were very entangled, and his hand that was tightly holding Lu Zhe's arm trembled a little.He wanted to try to be honest... wanted to tell Lu Zhe... but he was a little uncertain, not sure whether he could really peel himself off in front of Lu Zhe... Moreover, he was not sure After Lu Zhe found out, would he kill him...

In fact, his past is not a secret.Anyone with a little bit of power can find out something and then speculate.And what things, for the current self, can't be used as weapons.

It's just that there is a knot in my heart, an endless knot.

The people of those days have already been tortured and killed by him one by one now. I don't know if there are any bones that have been reduced to the lips of stray dogs.But besides the pleasure of sadism, there is endless emptiness... Confusion...

It seems that there is a huge black hole in my heart, which is constantly swallowing and spinning.

Therefore, another self was born without him knowing, and since then he has separated himself and drawn a clear boundary.

There is no past that he is afraid to face, but the darkness accumulated in his heart over the years made him subconsciously escape.Because it is clear that it is a beast that can devour human nature.

"If you really want to know that much...I'll tell you." Shen Yayu's voice was a little hoarse, because he knew what kind of morbid darkness he was about to reveal.

Clear, yet inexplicable.

When Shen Yayu spoke, Lu Zhe keenly noticed that Shen Yayu exuded a black and negative aura... This feeling is very bad.Just like my downturned negative energy some time ago, that kind of dark feeling is something that people can't avoid.

But Lu Zhe could only endure it... not only for the mission, but also because of his heartache.Otherwise, he wouldn't be doing over and over again temptations that are irrelevant to the task, and actions that evoke memories.

Lu Zhe is not a psychiatrist, he is not of such a high level, but due to the large number of psychological books he has read in the space before, plus his learning speed has always been not bad and he has some systematic assistance.At least, he knew how to give some psychological hints... Although the beginning of his study was actually to better complete the task in the future.

After hearing that Shen Yayu was willing to be honest, it was almost a conditioned reflex.Lu Zhe quickly held Shen Yayu's hand without the slightest distrust or questioning or questioning again.Instead, he led Shen Yayu to lean on the roof in the most relaxed posture, and looked at Shen Yayu with a look of concentration and trust.

When Shen Yayu felt the natural breeze blowing over his face, he felt a little relieved.He also wished that he could speak in a more calm and peaceful way, instead of the stupid look of being plunged into a dark swamp and unable to extricate himself.

Maybe it was because of the environment, maybe it was because he had suppressed it for too long, or maybe it was because Lu Zhe was focused and slightly nervous... He felt a kind of relaxation, as if he could breathe out slightly with the breath he held.

Faced with the darkness and the negative emotions in my heart, it seems that it is not so difficult to express or vent.

Under Lu Zhe's meticulous and fluent guidance, Shen Yayu only spoke, and the rest was revealed naturally without Lu Zhe pulling too much.

Following Shen Yayu's words spoken in a calm tone, Lu Zhe could not help but substitute himself.

Although Shen Yayu felt comfortable after saying it... But Lu Zhe didn't feel so comfortable.

As a mentor, sometimes you have to face not only the negativity unilaterally vented, but also the malice contained in the subjective emotions of the parties involved.

Although Shen Yayu spoke calmly in a relatively peaceful tone, in a narrative and on the sidelines tone.

However, Lu Zhe, who directly faced these negative darkness directly, was able to suppress his choked up voice with tears streaming down his face, almost with a relatively strong mental strength.Because he didn't want to disturb Shen Yayu's rare release and rare peace.

Shen Yayu actually simplifies his experience quite a bit, most of which are briefly mentioned.It cannot be denied that after speaking out, my emotions have stabilized a lot, and the black hole in my heart seems to have shrunk to an insignificant position.I finally took a breath and spit it out...

Looking at the sky in the dark night, the twinkling stars actually calmed him down.Shen Yayu breathed a sigh of relief, but after turning her head to look at Lu Zhe who was holding her hands tightly, her pupils shrank again.

At this moment, Lu Zhe's thin pajama collar was completely wet because of the tears falling down, his eyes and nose were unbearably red, his lips were bitten red because of enduring the physical choking sound, and his whole body was bruised. It seems to be suppressing something, a small-scale twitch...that small-scale twitch, Shen Yayu didn't even notice it when he was confiding.

Seeing that Shen Yayu finally vented, Lu Zhe burst into tears immediately with a "wow", and then threw himself on Shen Yayu and hugged him. After being firmly caught by Shen Yayu, he cried and hiccupped at the same time, pitiful and ridiculous.

And Shen Yayu was also taken aback by Lu Zhe's state, quickly caught Lu Zhe who was rushing over, and patted Lu Zhe's back forcefully, trying to soothe and appease his unnatural twitching.

Lu Zhe buried his head in Shen Yayu's arms, almost enduring the pain of cutting his throat with a knife. His voice was so hoarse that he said "I'm sorry."

As soon as Lu Zhe's voice came out, Shen Yayu felt a little silly...how did he become so dumb, his vocal cords seemed to be completely worn out.So he was anxious and didn't care too much, he quickly hugged Lu Zhe and walked towards the hall, telling the doctor to come home quickly.

After being embraced by the princess by Shen Yayu, Lu Zhe also curled up in Lu Zhe's arms obediently, but his back still trembled from time to time and hiccupped.Fortunately, the tears had stopped, otherwise Lu Zhe suspected that he would lose his eyesight.

In fact, Lu Zhe had already made mental preparations when he was channeling Shen Yayu's thoughts again... After all, Shen Yayu's character and perverted hobbies could not have been formed overnight.It's not that he didn't guess Shen Yayu's suffering when he was abandoned when he was young, traveling to so many places...

But when Shen Yayu said it, Lu Zhe realized...he still thought too little, too simple.

When Shen Yayu was abandoned on the street by his family back then, because of his rare Asian face, the oppression he suffered while wandering was already unbearable, but what happened next was the beginning of the nightmare.Later, he was caught and sent to the police station because he was stealing bread, and then he was sent to an orphanage.

At that time, the orphanages in foreign countries were not as beautiful and stable as the current society. At that time, the children in the orphanages had nothing to do but be sold as prostitutes or some high-end places for the upper class to play.As for adoptions by well-meaning people, in the early days of frequent incidents and turmoil, there were very few of them...

Shen Yayu was born beautiful and had an extremely rare Asian face. She was sent out of the orphanage within a week after entering the orphanage.However, because of his stubbornness, and it happened that the man was extremely patient... he sharpened his claws for quite a long time.

However, Shen Yayu also had a lucky time, and there was such a short period of beauty in the whole miserable childhood.It was an old lady... At that time, he rescued Shen Yayu, who was covered in bruises and was running around and passed out.

But happiness is always short-lived. The old lady has sustenance for Shen Yayu because he has a son.But his son is an out-and-out bastard. Not to mention placing his mother in a slum, he also beats the old man from time to time.And the grandma really cared for Shen Yayu with all her heart, every time she calculated the time to drive Shen Yayu out to find something to eat...

But once, the estimate was wrong...

That time, when Shen Yayu returned to the small house with the bread he had scrambled for, he saw a man and an old man lying motionless on the ground.

The man is a scumbag. After getting rid of the old man who dragged the oil bottle, he saw the boy's Shen, and he had evil thoughts in his heart.That time, Shen Yayu used the knife she carried with her to severely smash the man's eyeball.Then he started to run away with scars all over his body...

After that, it just kept tossing and turning, and then fled...

During this period, I saw too much of the darkest side of the bottom of the society, and I also had to swallow my breath in order to survive.

Constantly being betrayed, tortured, and then running away... Finally, after seeing the opportunity and escaping to China, I felt relieved.With some belongings that he stole, he lived in a relatively traditional and strictly controlled home country.

The previous experience created the desire for life.The resilience of not being suppressed is also destined to be extraordinary.

So Shen Yayu succeeded, stood on the territory of China, and embarked on another flight towards the place he had tried to leave.

But this time, he was strong enough.So he began to start from scratch again, and the difficulties encountered this time were not considered difficult in front of Shen Yayu... He has already been through the flames of hell many times, so how could he be afraid of those little ghosts and monsters.

As for those who made him grow up, he will thank them all in his own way.

The author has something to say: >/////

In fact, entering v is very disturbing. . .Dreaming that the collection dropped to 100...