summer passerby

In the dimly lit room, Zhuang Gaoyang looked awkwardly at Jiang Xindong who was half leaning on the window sill.

Just now he had a conversation with He Ting, and Jiang Xindong heard everything.

It's all his fault, after getting along with him this year, he felt that He Ting was a very emotional person.

When Jiang Xindong said the reason for the breakup, he didn't believe it, so he smartly made this phone call for confirmation.

Unexpectedly, the result was more tragic than he thought...

He Ting was less human than he thought...

The window was opened a little, Jiang Xindong put one hand in his pocket, the collar of his shirt was casually opened, his head was always facing outward, looking at the dark night outside expressionlessly.The wind messed up the fine hair on his forehead, revealing slightly tired eyes. The glass window reflected half of his deep side face, and some stubble on his chin protruded, adding a bit of sternness to his normally energetic facial features. .

Zhuang Gaoyang was stunned for two seconds. One was that he had never seen Jiang Xindong look so slovenly, and the other was that Jiang Xindong was handsome even though he was slovenly.

After regaining his strength, he coughed twice: "Why do you have to hang yourself on a tree..."

"I'm fine," Jiang Xindong interrupted him, his voice was low and hoarse, like sand in his mouth, "you go back."

Zhuang Gaoyang hesitated, thinking to himself, judging from the situation these few days, how can you look okay?

I don't know how hurt your expression was just now, go look in the mirror!

"Shall I play games with you?" He still couldn't let go.

Jiang Xindong frowned: "I want to be alone for a while."

Zhuang Gaoyang inadvertently caught a glimpse of the red circles under his eyes, and didn't know what to say, so he slowly retreated to the door: "Don't come to the rehearsal for a few days, eat well, and Auntie will worry again if you faint again."

"Ah."

The day before going abroad, He Ting and Ye Zhiming met in a cafe.

Ye Zhiming handed He Ting a bank card: "I know that you secretly paid my tuition fees for me. These are the money I earned from part-time jobs during the summer vacation. It's not much. I'll pay you back slowly in the future."

He Ting pursed his lips: "It's not me, I never helped you pay your tuition."

Ye Zhiming was stunned: "How about the money in the meal card?"

"I recharged it, but that's all I did. The rest was handed in by Xu Ming. Maybe he didn't want you to be pressured, so he never told you." He Ting pushed back the bank card on the table, and by the way Give all the printed Sanya ticket stubs to Ye Zhiming, "He booked the air ticket and hotel ticket to Sanya in April. He originally booked it for you as a birthday present for three people. Now that he's gone, I also want to buy it." I can’t go anymore, if you go, send me a picture.”

Ye Zhiming's eyes were quickly covered with mist, he shook his head in a daze, and didn't speak for a long time.

He Ting stuffed the ticket stub into his hand, and said with a smile: "Why didn't he book the ticket for June? Now it's a good thing, he can't even go."

Ye Zhiming stirred the spoon in the coffee cup and murmured softly: "Did he really leave?"

"Let's go," He Ting sighed, "You two should make it clear if you have an idea, it's not like you will never come back after going abroad."

"It's not clear, we are not from the same world, I am not good enough for him," Ye Zhiming covered his eyes, and liquid continued to flow from his fingers, "And he deleted my WeChat, because he really doesn't want to Get involved with me."

He Ting choked up and couldn't speak.

He understood this feeling, because on the night Zhuang Gaoyang called him, Jiang Xindong also deleted his WeChat.

I was really disappointed, and I didn't want to have any more entanglements, so I completely erased a person from the contact list.

He can no longer see Jiang Xindong's circle of friends, and can only get news from the Internet like many fans.

On the day he boarded the plane, Jiang Xindong's fans exceeded one million.

From then on, he is no longer Jiang Xindong's only one, but just one of millions of fans, becoming a dispensable denominator.

The plane was flying in the blue sky, and he watched a red sun rising from the clouds in the sky. City B gradually shrank in his field of vision, and finally shrank to the size of a thumb.

What used to be real, can no longer be grasped.

People who once dreamed of going to the end of time are gone now.

There are some things he chooses to rot in his heart, and he will leave alone in the future.

Do you regret it?Can't tell.Life is so boring, meeting Jiang Xindong is already the happiest and brightest thing in his ordinary life.

It can only be said to be a pity, a pity that you are young and absurd, and you are beyond your power.After all, I failed to walk through the autumn wind and spring moon with the amazingly youthful person, and walk to the snow and white head together.

As the plane continued to go up, the stewardess came over and asked He Ting to turn off the sun visor.

When closed, nothing can be seen.

He Ting closed his eyes silently, thinking that it would be good if he couldn't see.

After all, what you can't take away at an altitude of 18 meters is not only the city where you have lived for [-] years, but also the people you have loved hard.

After coming to America, He Ting fell in love with watching the sun rise and set.The time difference between New York and domestic time is 12 hours.

The sun rises here and the sun sets, and the day and night are completely reversed.

Many times, although He Ting lives at night, what he thinks about is the daytime on the other side of the ocean.

He likes to watch and think about what Jiang Xindong on the other side of the world is doing.

He watched the sunset 29 times in a row, and at the 30th time, he couldn't help calling Jiang Xindong an overseas call.

New York time is 6:45 p.m., domestic time is 6:45 a.m.

Jiang Xindong, who was still asleep, answered the phone and gave a vague "Hello".

No one spoke, and the sound of each other's breathing on the phone was entangled. After a while, he called out tentatively: "He Ting?"

He Ting hadn't heard this voice for a long time, tears flowed down his face.

"Is it you?" Jiang Xindong's vocal cords were loose, mixed with a bit of laziness in sleep, and he didn't know whether he was awake or not.

He Ting's heart was pounding in his throat, he was stunned and didn't know what to say.

Soon the person on the other end coughed, breathing from light to heavy, and laughed like a self-deprecating: "No."

Then there was only the "beep" sound of the phone hanging up.

He Wenbin entrusted someone to handle the US mobile phone card. On the same day, He Ting received a call from his father, asking him if he had contacted Jiang Xindong again, and issued an ultimatum.

He Ting was so angry that he smashed his phone, and immediately applied for a new phone card with Zong Gu's name, but he never dared to call Jiang Xindong again.

A month later, Chen Linxi told him in WeChat that she had changed jobs.

He Ting replied lightly, "Okay".

Chen Linxi said a lot later, and even sent him a long email.

He Ting only read the beginning, because he was really not in the mood.

He always wanted to wait until the day when he was in a better mood to read it, but his mental state was getting worse and worse, so he never clicked on it again.

After coming to the United States for half a year, He Ting was unexpectedly popular, and he was confessed to several times, but he didn't have the heart to refuse them all.

The funny thing is, every time he rejects others, he thinks of Jiang Xindong, wondering if he would feel guilty when rejecting others before?Will it be confessed by many people now?

But no chance to ask.

Later, Jiang Xindong signed with an economic company and officially debuted. His popularity gradually grew, and the songs he wrote appeared on major charts.

He occasionally participates in several variety shows, but he always looks indifferent and alienated.

Once in a talk show, the host asked him if he had ever had an unforgettable love.

He thought for a long time and said, "Yes."

The host was puzzled: "If there is, there is, why add the word 'bar'."

He thought for a moment: "Because it is true for me, but it may not be true for the other party."

The host was quite surprised: "There are still people you can't take down! Then do you still like him?"

He smiled lightly: "I forgot."

When He Ting saw this sentence, he turned off the video, dragged his classmates to nightclubs for three days, but still felt empty in his heart, as if he had lost a large piece of meat, and occasionally covered it with his hands, causing intense and sharp pain.

He tried to fall in love with a boy who had been chasing him for a long time, but the more he met, the more he felt guilty. In the end, the relationship ended without a problem before it even started.

Gradually, He Ting felt that he was sick.

He seems to have been living in the past, always watching the reality, unmoved.

He has eaten a lot of Michelin stars, but he always misses the food stalls he and Jiang Xindong go to the most; he travels to different cities, but he only misses the winding and remote alleys of City B.

He finds everything boring and tiring.

Classes are tiring, talking is tiring, eating is tiring, and even breathing is tiring.

It's tiring to live.

He was diagnosed with major depressive disorder that year.

Self-harm and thoughts of suicide.

Wearing earphones on the windowsill to feel the spring breeze, I want to jump down, but I can't bear the familiar magnetic sound from the earphones.

Jiang Xindong will release new songs again, and now he can’t hear them after jumping down——with this in mind, he walked back to the bedroom from the window sill.

Maybe it's out of self-help, maybe it's because there is still a glimmer of hope in life-whether He Chenxing's existence or Jiang Xindong's singing voice.

In short, He Ting began to try to adapt to the new environment.With the help of Zonggu and the psychiatrist, life began to have some improvement and hope.

When I won the first international photography award, my first reaction was to tell Jiang Xindong that I just saw you win the award before, but now I am so good that I can win the award.

But when he picked up the phone, he suddenly realized that that person was no longer in the correspondent list.

At that moment, he suddenly realized that they had really broken up.