Peacock

When I woke up I found myself on the couch.

As if my whole body was filled with lead, I opened a slit and saw the closed bedroom door.

I even touched my butt hypocritically, hoping that something had happened, but the fact is that Tang Ling threw me on the sofa to fend for myself after I passed out.

I feel so cold, and more importantly, the box on the wooden shelf next to it seems to be a large intestine. I woke up and it woke up, and I could hear the sound of it rustling in the box.

Reluctant to give up, I knelt down and looked in again, but I met it's eyes: it was spitting snake letters at me.

I was so frightened that I took half a step back, my heart froze, and I rushed into Tangling's room.

He didn't seem to be asleep, and he looked over the moment I opened the door rashly.

"Cold." I said casually again: "My house is so far away, the morning bus will take a while to arrive, and I will leave at 07:30."

Tang Ling lifted half of the quilt, seeing that I hadn't responded for a long time, he said, "Isn't it cold?"

Every time he speaks, my well-developed neural lobes will automatically play the BGM, and now I feel like I heard the Manh? de Carnaval played by the six-line alto viol.

I buried myself in his thick quilt very peacefully, only showing a pair of eyes.I saw a burnt yellow circle on the gray-blue quilt cover, and I guessed that he might have fallen asleep while smoking a cigarette.

"Is that appropriate yesterday?"

He probably thought I was referring to my Spring Dream Night, so he squinted his eyes.

In the end, I said again: "I mean, Sister Xiaowei. Why don't you make it clear what misunderstandings you have, because if you do this, she will misunderstand and be sad."

Sure enough, people learned to walk upright in the process of being a bitch and erecting a memorial archway.I squeezed the corner of the quilt and wanted to slap myself. I'm not kind. In fact, it has nothing to do with me whether she is hurt or not.

"Whether she hurts or not is none of my business."

As a result, Tang Ling also said the same.

So badass, but so handsome.Although I still don't understand the ins and outs of this matter.

Just when I was about to ask something again, Tang Ling suddenly said, "It's dawn."

The bright red sunlight burned on Tang Ling's side face, and also dyed his frizzy light-colored hair brightly, creating some inexplicable sense of transparency, like glass.

We were separated by ten centimeters, and I wanted to touch him, but when I was awake, I didn't have the guts.

Finally I turned myself face-on, and whispered, a little resentfully, "The sun is just a big blind light bulb."

Tang Ling was silent for a moment, then stared out of the window and said, "Where's the moon?"

I didn't think much of it: "The moon is a timid giant mirror."

I explained, "Because I feel like every night I'm so stupid, so ugly, so useless."

Tangling just said, "I don't think you thought so last night."

I blushed, and said sophistry: "...it rained last night, and there was no moon."

There is a small globe on his window sill, and when the wind blows, it looks a little frail and crumbling.I'm addicted to bad words: "The earth is a garbage dump that can never be cleaned up."

Then Tang Ling turned to look at me, there was no smile on the corner of his mouth, but his eyes were crescent-shaped, and he said, "Everyone is trash."

I don't know whether this is a rhetorical question or a statement, and his tone is always vague.

My eyes fluttered uncomfortably, and I said again: "You, you are different."

"it's the same."

"Different!" I said, "You're a beautiful Lesbian with recycling value."

Tang Ling didn't speak, probably because she was tired of this neurotic kindergarten dialogue.

In the end the two of us just lay there, like a married couple who hadn't had sex in 20 years.

"You don't have to go to school?" he asked.

"You don't have to go to school?" I asked.

"I didn't go to school." I answered first.

"Well, me too." Then he replied.

He stared at me thoughtfully, "You came to Baima to go to school?"

"Shaolin Temple." I said, "I was banned from eating meat three months ago. Now I am a lay disciple."

Gathering up my courage, I shrugged against the quilt to his chest, and reached out to touch the upward arc of his lips, not to let the smile fall back.

"Smile more, it looks good."

He raised his eyebrows, and scratched my neck with his fingers teasingly, "You really care a lot, little monk."

After contacting his previous conversation with Chen Wumian, I think that Tang Ling’s love story may not be the usual ups and downs, which makes him occasionally reveal the kind of heroine who insists on not having an abortion and giving birth to a child in the literature of youth pain temperament.

I raised my hand to pull down the quilt, but Tang Ling thought I was going to make trouble again, so she grabbed my wrist with her big hand.

As if he had found something, he gently stroked my palm again, then pulled out the four fingers of my left hand except the thumb, and said like a child catching an insect: "There are cocoons."

"How can there be no cocoons in boxing!"

"You Shaolin boxing only uses the left hand?"

"The world is so big."

Tang Ling smiled, didn't look at me again, and said after a while, "You're quite interesting."

My head became a little dizzy: "I'm very interesting."

I was suddenly saddened by the brief lingering peppermint scent of his beginnings.I stood up yesterday just thinking that it would be just one night after all, and I would just try it if I tried, it doesn't really matter if it succeeds or not.Only now did I realize that it wasn't all a behavior controlled by hormones, and I never thought it would be so over the top.If I had known that it was like this, I would definitely not have taken that step, at least I would not have woken up and ran to him.Because I clearly understand that there will be nothing in the future.

He doesn't even know my name.

"What are you crying for?"

I heard him speak hoarsely.

I didn't react, and in a blink of an eye, I realized that my cheeks were already wet.

Clutching my wrist, he supported me, his affectionate but indifferent eyes lingered on my embarrassed face, as if he wanted to find out the root of the sadness.

"Little novice, don't cry."

I cried and said, "I'm not a little monk..."

In the third month of coming to Baima, this was the first time I cried.

In fact, I'm really scared, I'm afraid that something happened to me with a complete stranger, and I will be forced to experience what it means to be short-lived.I also feel cowardly, and I almost can't remember why I came to Baima in the first place, the one thing I should have done when I first arrived.

I think of the shadowy limousines, the broken road barriers, the broken baroque bows, the cries of women and the groans of men.Tang Ling's embrace is much warmer than his own. I would have liked Tang Ling to be my brother, uncle, or even father.I have nothing since I was a child, and I think it would be great if he had nothing since he was a child. We can always embrace each other like this, because we only have each other.

Lying on his shoulder, I cried for a long time, sometimes almost wailing, and my tears became an infinite and out-of-control tide during the typhoon season.

I felt like I was dying, he seemed to be a little flustered and asked me if I had a drink of water.

While he turned to go to the kitchen to pour water, I tried my best to look at him through the blurred window of tears, without leaving any words, and then I ran out of his house like a madman.