halfway friend

A hundred days are like an instant.At the end of May, we moved out of the campus one after another with big bags and small bags. My parents had already booked a hotel next to the exam room for two days of the exam.

Everyone in the dormitory was busy with their own work, full of self-mockery of "packing up and leaving" and emotion at the time of graduation.After tidying up, Xin came over and chatted nonsense with me, saying that they would walk out of the school together to commemorate this moment.

"Has everyone cleaned up? Then I'll call the housekeeper to check!"

"Okay, okay, check it out and leave early."

As the head of the dormitory, I ran out to find the housekeeper who was busy on several floors to complete the final mission.However, the whereabouts of these three or four aunts are really uncertain. Every dormitory I asked said: "She seems to be in the X building..."

When I came back sweating profusely, I said helplessly, "I can't find anyone, my God, when will we...be able to leave."

The last few words were spoken almost silently, because I felt the silence in the dormitory, which was indescribably strange.

"What's wrong? Suddenly so serious."

Zheng Xin raised her eyes and said, "Ah, I'm idle anyway, so I'll help you find it, and you can rest for a while."

An hour later, we finished the school-leaving procedures and walked out of the bright school gate.The stone tablet engraved with the school motto is still solemn in the middle of the pool, and the sound of the water is rushing, wanting to say goodbye.It is a pity that I felt no reluctance or melancholy when I was under pressure, and all my delicate emotions were suppressed by my heavy nerves.Subconsciously, I took another look at the classroom in the first year of high school.Its curtains are tightly closed, seemingly airtight, separating me forever.

Separated from Xin, dragged the heavy package and walked towards Dad's car.It seems to be the regression of the journey and the return of the plot, but I am already standing at the next node of my life.

At the beginning of June, the unified examination was carried out in an orderly manner.After three days of high concentration in my life, I have no energy to think about the result. I just want to find a place to relax, or an empty room, or a quiet bookstore... Ah!anywhere is fine!

When I was about to get home, I received a call from Lin Xiru. This prodigal son who has been in Lingqiong for three years must have something to share with me.Listening to her wild and unconstrained description, my head is getting bigger and bigger, so I have to be courteous: "Miss, your dream of Zhejiang University will come true. Maybe you will pay off Huabei University! Send you auspicious words, please forgive me..."

"Damn Chen Su, are you going to sleep again? You know how to sleep when you sleep, just like a pig!"

With tears in my eyes, I pressed the phone with the mentality of being generous and ready to die, and who knew that another call came in...

It was Zheng Xin, she was surprised by my tired voice.

"What's wrong? Did you not go well with the exam?"

"No...it's just that my brain is swollen and tired."

There was silence for a while, and just as I was about to say goodbye after listening to her comforting words, she said, "Come out, the old place of the city library... I have something for you."

Under the strange eyes of my parents, I took a few banknotes and went to the library with my mobile phone.

Coming out of the elevator door on the sixth floor, I saw Zheng Xin sitting on a chair outside the reading room, wearing a denim dress, it seemed that he had also returned home.

"Go in and find a place, there was no space just now."

I followed her, walking slowly.For no reason, the footsteps were unusually heavy.

We ended up finding an out-of-the-way sofa to sit down—not reading a book anyway.

She turned her head to pick up something, although her long hair was tied up, there was still a light fragrance tickling at the tip of my nose.

"Ouyang gave it to you, the day you pack it up and go home."

Holding the ordinary khaki envelope with both hands, I suddenly felt a little timid.

"I didn't give it to you, and I asked your roommate to keep it a secret... because the exam is coming soon, I'm afraid you will be affected... I made my own decision, I'm sorry."

I didn't interrupt her explanation, saw the broken seal, and asked her, "Have you read it?"

This is clearly not her style.In the silence, in the midst of suspicion and anxiety, I unfolded the letter.

"Chen Su, I'm Ouyang. I haven't written a letter before, so you can just take care of it. Actually, I don't know if this form is right, I just know that I want to write it like this, and then let others bring it to you. I know you don't want to see me either. You hate embarrassment, I know it. If I don't write it, you'll never hear it.

Chen Su, unexpectedly, I have gotten used to being apart from you for more than a year.This is also very good, because I have to leave after the exam in June, and go to a farther place, so I will feel easier.

Chen Su, if I hadn't said so capriciously to let us be together, what would it be like now?Maybe I shouldn't have been so impulsive at the beginning, but I really couldn't look at you without saying those words.It's a good feeling to be a good friend for a lifetime, don't you think?

I want to say, I like you.Because I like you, I want to hide some things. I don't want to tell you about my mother. I hide it from you. I'm afraid that you will get angry, or that you will say that I am selfish or something.I feel shameful too, really, so shameful... I hope your family will not be disturbed by the outside world anymore, everything you care about will be fine, I should no longer be involved, and should not destroy what you have beautiful things.

So I made my own decisions, like a shadowy manipulator.I saw everything I expected, the results I wanted.Let you know at this time, just because I don't want you to blame yourself anymore.I know your weaknesses, your limits, and I don't want to be your new weaknesses, your obstacles.

Before it was completely out of control between us, I wanted to let go and let everything go back to square one.

Please forget me this weirdo!You are still the one who didn't meet Ouyang Ye, and you will no longer experience encounters that have nothing to do with you. "

Holding this unformatted letter paper that I wanted to refute almost every word, my hands trembled slightly.I suppressed my crying, the small voice was still amplified in such an occasion.

Xin was at a loss at the side, mumbling: "I just knew..."

I wiped my tears with difficulty and said, let's go.

Passing by her house, the two stood downstairs in embarrassment.

"I... I don't know why I opened it, I know it's wrong." There was a bitter smile on her pretty mouth.

"Maybe I'm too impatient."

"Irritable?" I looked up, and there was an unexpected warm touch on my face.

Like the corner of a delicate handkerchief, the fingertips gently touched the corners of my red eyes.When she was in a trance, she actually came closer again and kissed me on the left half of my cheek.

Against the summer light, I can still clearly see her sparse and slender eyelashes and misty pupils.

"Happy graduation," she said shyly, "come to me when you're bored."

After a long silence, I gently shook my head and said to her, "Ah Xin, some things may not be what you imagined."

She shook her head at me too, smiled and walked in the door.

We were all too young to think that was love.When it really turned into love, I started to be afraid again.

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