"Comprehensive" I want to return to the source

My name is Fengya, isn't it a nice name?Do you think my parents love me very much, and I am the crystallization of their love?

Since I was in my mother's warm little house, I have been thinking about who am I?Why did I become like this?Where am I?A series of questions no one can answer me.

Maybe I was not completely reincarnated, and I don't know why I used the phrase 'not completely reincarnated' to describe this situation.

When I was born, I always felt a little weird when I saw the affectionate look of my parents.But I still think our family is the happiest family in the world. Since I can remember, my father and mother never quarreled. At that time, I really thought that our family would live happily ever after, but I didn’t know that It's just my own fantasy, just like a fairy tale, it's just a flash in the pan.

Kindergarten was late that day, and my mother didn't pick me up on time as usual. I felt uncomfortable for a while, and I was very irritable, as if I wanted to vent something but couldn't vent it. Is this the feeling of sulking?

This is a novel feeling for me, to classify this emotion as a category of dislike.

All the children around were picked up by their families, and only two or three were left wandering around the kindergarten like him, waiting for familiar adults to pick them up.

Waist-length hair with big waves, a white long-sleeved shirt and black suit trousers. She is tall and slender. She should be convex and concave. It is outrageous. No one would think that such a beautiful woman is actually married. The woman is a mother, and she is wearing ten-centimeter-high black high-heeled shoes. She smells like a child elite and a strong woman. She is talking on the phone at this time, her cheeks are flushed with rouge, and she looks like spring has come.

I was sulking, and with my eyes wandering, I saw the beautiful woman waving to her at the door. No matter what emotions I had before, they disappeared, and I flew over, thinking that my mother would come to pick me up, and picked me up.

But it was all in front of my mother, and my mother didn't stretch out her arms, and was still talking on her phone.It sounds like a male voice, but I'm sure it's not Dad!

I had a vague feeling that something was going to happen.

Sure enough, I couldn't sleep that night, I went to the bathroom and passed by Mom and Dad's room, the light ran out from the crack in the door, and the sound of conversation came into my ears, she said: Sorry, let's get a divorce.

He agreed without asking why.

She said that I am sorry that you have troubled you for so many years, but... please forgive my selfishness for the last time, and help me take care of Fengya, please, she pleaded bitterly.

This time he was silent.

For a long time, my legs standing at the door of the room were so numb that they didn't feel like my own.

I can't promise you this...

I didn't listen to the next words, and slowly moved back to my room, as long as I know that I will become an orphan, that's enough.

Although I kept saying: It’s okay, it’s okay, I still have myself... to comfort myself, but there is obviously no rain in this room, why is my face so obvious?Some water stains flowed to the corner of the mouth, and I licked it with my tongue. It was... salty...

The next day I was eating a tasteless breakfast in a bowl, listening to my parents discussing who I belonged to like goods in name.Just when I couldn't help but say that I don't want to be with either of them, as long as they give me enough support on time, a strong old man broke in - my grandma, the mother of my nominal father.

Holding the crutches and leaning on the ground, he said energetically, "The old woman still has several years to live, you don't want a little girl, I want an old woman! If you don't want to raise her, I will!" Such a sentence.

At that time, what I thought was: Did you see, Fengya, you are not a child who is abandoned by everyone, someone still wants you, Fengya...

When the two of them left, they only took their own clothes and personal belongings with them, and kept everything else including the small bungalow on the second floor, such as the desktop computer and laptop computer lying quietly in the study room.That's right, how could they pay attention to these extraneous things to them who are not cheap?It's better to leave some of the so-called face things they insist on.

In this way, my grandma and I depended on each other.

Every month, considerable living expenses and education expenses are charged into my card, this is what my grandma told me.But I gave the card to my grandma in the name of keeping it for me, otherwise this stubborn old man would not accept it.

Five years, maybe God gave this late old man the last deadline——

When I was nine years old, my grandma became very seriously ill. I don’t know how serious it was, but I only knew that it could take the life of my only relative.She didn't want to go to the hospital, she said: "It's a place where you can eat money, my old lady, maybe tomorrow will be fine."

That stubborn old man...

Just dragging on like this, holding my hand at the last moment, the wrinkled chrysanthemum face was full of reluctance for himself: "Nizi... the old lady Qian in this card... didn't move a single point... ...The thing that worries me the most is..." The unfinished words will always accompany the stubborn old man into the grave.

"grandmother……"

May you all be well in heaven...

The sky is still as blue as ever...

Wind, can you take my wishes to heaven to that stubborn old man, her little girl Feng can take good care of herself when she grows up...

※※※※※※※※※

Maybe God couldn't bear me to be alone in the end, so he sent me a younger brother—Hua Luo in another strange way.

my brother.

It was when I was ten years old, I can't remember clearly——

Luo Luo appeared out of thin air. Although I was very scared, my instinct told me that Hua Luo would not harm me. What's more, apart from the money left by my grandma when she passed away, there was nothing left for me to complete my studies. Isn't it.

Luo Luo can live very well without eating. I don’t know what he insists on. He has always kept the habits that humans should have. I guess maybe Hua Luo was a human in his previous life.

I remember the first time Luo Luo ate the breakfast I made, the entanglement on his face can still be clearly played back in his mind, probably because he has never seen a person who eats so seriously, in fact, that is also my grandma It's not like eating so seriously for the first time after that.

A taste of home...

But, I'm leaving now...

lolo...lolo...

The moment I closed my eyes, I finally realized the mood of that strong and stubborn old man when he left with a 'ruthless heart' -

Deep reluctance, what if I am not by your side and no one takes care of you?

——Lolo

—My brother... I'm sorry...

——If there is a future... I will cook you home-style meals in the future, okay...

——the afterlife...

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☆, Origin of Craftsman God