After raising the emperor, he always wanted to marry me

"I'm a man! I'm a man! I can work for you! I can work for you! I beg you! Don't sell me out!" The thin boy knelt on the ground and clutched a pair of gray trouser legs tightly, his nose mixed with With tears streaming down his mouth.

The owner of the gray trouser legs picked up the boy's collar and swung his rough palm twice. Two slap marks quickly appeared on the boy's pale and thin face. Being pulled, two drops of blood snaked down.After two slaps, the little boy, who hadn't had a good meal for several days, was so slapped that his eyes turned white and he almost fainted.

"Fucking little bastard!" The ferocious man cursed angrily, let go and threw the boy to the ground, pulled off the riding whip pinned to his waist, and lashed the boy's back fiercely: "All day long, I pretend to be dead." Life, what a bad luck! I'll let you play dead again! I'll let you play dead again!"

"I dare not... Grandpa, I dare not... Grandpa..." The boy was whipped so badly that he cried and howled, rolling back and forth on the ground with his head in his arms, trying to avoid the whips that were chasing his soul: "I dare not, I I dare not, I dare not again..."

He murmured the broken words of forgiveness, and suddenly woke up from the nightmare.

What caught the eye was the bright yellow brocade bead curtain, and the comfortable feather satin Su embroidery under her body, and lying beside her was the most powerful man in the world today.

"Little thing, what did you dream about? Are you so scared?" King Gu Hong stretched out his hand to wipe off the fine beads of sweat on Nan Xi's forehead, and his broad arms easily embraced that thin and small body.

Nan Xi raised her head, her Adam's apple twitched slightly, her eyes blurred like a well-behaved lazy white cat: "Your Majesty, what do you think? You almost killed this servant just now, and this servant fell asleep and was still panicking."

"What a bold little slave, do you dare to say that I am a fool who only knows about sensuality?" Gu Hong tightened his arms, and covered the lively and moist mouth in his arms with his lips, as if chasing a deer in the world.

"Ah... um..." The weak young man was instantly suffocated, struggling slightly in his arms: "Your Majesty... Your Majesty, spare me... I dare not... I will never dare again..."

These tactful whispers cleverly covered up the shocking past in Nan Xi's nightmare.

***

Nan Xi's real name is not Nan Xi, and his surname is not even Nan.

He was born in a small town on the border of Dazhou, and his father was a small Serbian soldier guarding the border.

Due to the poverty of the family, his father married his mother when he was 25 years old and had his first child three years later.

His mother's health was not good, and his body was also weak. Since he was a child, his arms and legs were thin like a little girl.

Fortunately, the relationship between the father and the mother is very good. As long as he has this child, the father will be satisfied.

Nan Xi was the happiest child in the village where he was born.

Although, his father was just a low-level soldier, with only eight taels of silver for food and four shi of millet a year.But the team his father was in was exactly the direct descendant of the Yun family army that all the soldiers and warriors yearned for the most.

Because Yun Lie, the head of the Yun family, is an extremely rare good general who loves his soldiers like his son.Those who were on duty there always received many extra rations and rewards.

His mother is also very good at housekeeping, often doing needlework for the neighbors in exchange for some expensive flour and meat for him.

At that time, there were still a few chickens and ducks at home, and meat was often seen on the dinner table.

As long as he can remember, he rarely sees his father in the army, but every time his father comes back, he will bring him things in big and small bags.

Sometimes it was the bacon and jerky that he could not bear to eat in the army, sometimes it was the wooden toy carved by himself, sometimes it was small clothes and shoes brought back from the city by asking his superiors, and pearls for his mother. Chai and so on.

At that time, every time my father came back with good things, he would stand mysteriously in the yard with his hands behind his back to call him over, and then he would pierce his tender face twice with his full beard, like a magic trick. Throwing the good things behind his back into his arms at once.

He would happily run to the house with the big bundle in his hands to find his mother, and then foolishly wait for his mother to unpack the bundle for him and hand him the contents to eat or play with.

until the last time.

It was an extremely cold winter, and as the New Year was approaching, my mother bought a large piece of pork liver and a large piece of mutton and buried them in a large vat in the yard.

Regardless of the cold weather, he insisted on squatting in the yard every day waiting for his father to come back.

Because as long as his father came back, his mother would stew pork liver and mutton for him.

He waited and waited, through one snowstorm after another.

In the end, all he could see was his father's frost-covered face and cold body.

The person who came to report said that it was Yun Lie, the general of Fuguo, who had embezzled the cotton clothes and military pay allocated by the court, which caused a large number of frontier soldiers like his father to die of cold and hunger.

The mother looked at his father's body, hugged him and cried loudly.

He didn't cry, he just stared blankly at his livid father lying in the yard.

He didn't believe it, he didn't believe that his tall and stalwart father died like this.

He even didn't believe that the general who his father said loved soldiers like sons, that general Yun who would rather eat millet and wheat bran himself than give food to his soldiers would do such a thing.

After his father died, his mother, who had always been weak, couldn't afford it.

In order to ask a doctor to take medicine, the chickens and ducks at home and all the things that can be sold for money have been pawned, and even eating has become a problem.

At this moment, someone came to the door to force the foreign debts that my father owed last year to repair the house.

The sick mother was naturally unable to repay, so she could only kneel on the ground and kowtow to them.

The leader kicked his mother's stomach. He saw his mother spit out blood, whimpered and stopped moving.

He called his mother hoarsely, and before he could cry again, the fierce man grabbed his arm and pulled him up.

"Damn it, such a boy is worth two silver! Let's go!"

After all, the man carried him on his shoulders and didn't know where he was going to take him all the way.

***

At that time, he was less than nine years old.

He is short and weak, and people who want to work despise him for being small.But people who want to buy a son think that he is too old, and he may not be raised like his own.

In order to let him get rid of it as soon as possible, the creditor even found a female skirt, put some rouge and gouache on him, and dumped him to the old bustard in the Goulan courtyard for 30 taels of silver.

The man took the silver and ran away without a trace. The innocent little boy knelt down in front of the bustard, wiped the rouge off his face indiscriminately, and begged in a low voice: "Bodhisattva lady, Bodhisattva lady, I am not a daughter, please Let me go!"

"Let you go?" The bustard pinched her chin and laughed tremblingly: "That countryman is ignorant, and thinks that we only want a daughter here. Don't you know that a good-looking man here is worth more than a daughter."

After the bustard finished speaking, she immediately called two or three people to hold his hands and feet, peeled him clean from the inside out, threw him into the scalding hot water, and scrubbed him back and forth. The extremely high temperature scalded his whole body. Red, he overturned the barrel to escape, but was caught and hung on the beam for two days and two nights.

Until he lost all feeling in his arms, his lips were dried out due to long-term lack of water, and his whole body was frozen blue and white. Someone finally took him off the beam.

Due to prolonged hunger, he didn't even have the strength to open his eyes, so he could only curl up weakly on the ground.

"How is it? Have you thought about it? Will you still run away from now on?" Bustard half-knelt down, pinching his chin and smiling lightly.

With the last of his strength, he shook his head slowly.

"That's it." Although the old bustard's words were affirmative, his tone was clearly dissatisfied: "However, since you escaped once, I have to be more cautious."

From that day on, he only had one meal a day.

There is only a bowl of thin rice soup and a bowl of cold salt water for each meal, and there is not even a little dry food.

If he dared to cry, someone would tie his hands and hang him high on the roof of the beam, and starve him for two more days.

After more than a month, when he was tortured by the daily rice soup and salt water and was about to go crazy, the old man brought him a bowl of white rice.

He immediately rushed towards the rice like a mangy dog.

The old bustard raised her hand to touch his forehead, holding the white rice and placing it close to him, once again, "From now on, will you be obedient?"

He nodded hurriedly, swallowing hard.

He was like a hawk that had finally been tamed and no longer had the desire to struggle to escape.

In order to maintain a delicate skin, the bustard first took a thin bamboo stick to break the original oily skin on his body, then applied the medicine powder mixed with fine salt to the broken skin, wrapped it with a soft cloth, and finally used A rag gags his mouth to keep him from moaning!He groaned and waited until the skin and flesh healed, then repeated it again.

After three or five times, his skin finally became fragile.Just a little scraping with your nails can leave a red finger mark.

In order to be able to practice a soft enough waist, he was often hung in the air, wrapped in silk, and pulled repeatedly until his waist could swing freely like a spirit snake.

In order to be able to memorize the rhythm and memorize the composition, he will be whipped three times for one wrong beat, and stripped for three wrong notes, and sent to the front hall to be molested by those drunken drunkards .

At an age when other children are studying, at an age when other children are dependent on their parents, he is learning how to please men.

How to cry, how to laugh, how to talk.

How to walk, how to act like a spoiled child, how to scream pain, how to entertain customers, how to make customers throw money at you for a long time, how to make a man fall in love with you with just one look.

In the Goulan courtyard, he never had a full stomach, let alone a little bit of fish and meat. He was really exhausted and could only eat a little more fruit and drink a mouthful or two of astragalus for nourishing his body.

When he was unbearably hungry, he would still think of his parents.

I think of the scallion pancakes made by my mother, which are fragrant, crispy and delicious.His father always pretended to compete with him, and finally gave him alone.

What a happy child he used to be, but now his happiness is gone, and he doesn't even have anyone to resent.

***

The winter day of the 11th year of Yongxi.

He met Zhao Mingqi, the governor of Yinzhou, at an accidental banquet.

When the man saw him, his eyes immediately lit up.

He redeemed his body for him, brought him back to the mansion to take good care of him, and gave him a fresh and refined name: Nanxi.

Meaning: Qing Yun Yu Yu Yao Chen Xi.

He was grateful to Dade for holding the name, and he was glad that he finally didn't have to be beaten and scolded anymore, and finally didn't have to worry about it anymore.

He willingly dedicated himself to that person, desperately displaying all the advantages of his body.

He cooks tea and wine for him, plays the piano and paints for him, as long as he can get a smiling face, he will give it his life.

In the 12th year of Yongxi, on the eve of the Mid-Autumn Festival.

Zhao Mingqi held his small face and kissed him: "What a sweet baby, His Majesty will definitely like you when he sees you."

"Your Majesty... Your Majesty." He looked at Zhao Mingqi tentatively: "How could Your Majesty see me?"

"Of course I sent you into the palace." Zhao Mingqi said without hesitation: "What kind of place is the palace? Wouldn't it be better for you to live there than follow me?"

Zhao Mingqi told him straightforwardly in a seemingly tactful way that he wanted him to serve the old emperor who was as old as his father and had gray hair.

Make a beautiful and unique gift, make a gift that can be exchanged for a career agent for him.

Before leaving, Zhao Mingqi gave Nan Xi a box of fragrant medicine. It is said that with the box of fragrant medicine, he can keep the emperor's favor for a long time.

So, carrying the qin that he had cherished for a long time on his back, he walked into the palace wall as a former imperial qin master, and met the Supreme Emperor who had ruined his life.

Gu Hong, who is over forty years old, is extremely heroic, and his years of self-discipline have allowed the king to still maintain the domineering arrogance of looking at the world and planning strategies.

He was looked up and down, and his cheeks blushed immediately, showing a timid look.

"I'm just looking at you, why are you blushing?"

"Your Majesty was born too handsome, and my servant is shy." He lowered his head pitifully, and was suddenly pulled into a firm embrace by a pair of big hands.

"What did you say?" The king raised his chin.

"No... I don't know... The servant doesn't know..." Leaning in the king's arms, he closed his eyes delicately, but he hoped that the emperor was really the bad old man he imagined.

On the night of the Mid-Autumn Festival, he and the king had a happy meeting for the first time.

When Gu Hong kissed him, the fine stubble pierced his smooth little face, the touch was very much like his father who came back with a gift when he was a child.

I heard that if the eldest son of the king lived to this day, he should be as old as him.

After a while of secret pleasure, he immediately trampled on all his expectations of the king, and only respected him as an emperor.

Because he needs to live, and only by treating the emperor as the emperor can he survive.

After entering the palace, Nan Xi has been conscientiously accompanying King Gu Hong, being a beautiful and secular male favorite, enjoying everything he has given him.

Until one day, on the day of the Empress Dowager Cizhuang's birthday, after the sacrifice, the king was very sad and missed him, so he had to drink to relieve his sorrow.

When the king was very drunk, he hugged Nan Xi tightly and murmured to himself, telling the truth about the [-] frontier soldiers who died of cold and hunger.

From this, Nan Xi thought of the cause of her father's death, as if enlightened.

It turned out that his parents died because of him.

The general of the Yun family had never touched those military salaries at all. The military salaries were withheld by him in order to frame the prestigious Yun clan and consolidate the imperial power in his hands.

The emperor did not hesitate to sacrifice the lives of 3 people without even blinking an eye.

Over the years, Nan Xi always remembered the tragic death of her parents and the suffering he had suffered.

Who gave him this suffering?It is this headstrong, selfish and hypocritical emperor.

This emperor, who was obsessed with pleasure and did not think about making progress, regarded human life as dust and the people as worthless.

He was in a hurry, but there was nothing he could do.

He is just an inconspicuous male favorite, and he has no ability to kill the king of a country.

If you don't kill him, where will he vent his hatred.

He thought about it for a long time.

After thinking about it, he still thought of Zhao Mingqi.

That month, he wrote to ask him to prepare special products from his hometown. Zhao Mingqi, who was promoted, got rich, married a wife and had children, knew his current status, so naturally he didn't dare to neglect him, and quickly arranged everything he wanted.

On the eve of entering the palace, he remixed a little veratrum into the addictive spices that Zhao Mingqi gave him.

Veratrum can repel mosquitoes and flies and prevent pests. It is an excellent medicinal material.

One of the two things is under the jurisdiction of Yuxuan Palace, and the other is under the jurisdiction of the Department of Internal Affairs.

It has been tested by the imperial hospital, both are non-toxic and harmless.

After these two medicines collide, the onset of effect is slow, the effect is minimal, and it is extremely difficult to detect.

Even if someone notices it, it can be pushed openly to the innocence of the ignorant.

Therefore, until the death of the king, the real cause of the disease was not found out, and in the end it could only be attributed to overwork.

***

The Mid-Autumn Festival of that year was the first time I entered the palace to see you, the first time I climbed on your bed, you said you liked me, you said that I was the most heartfelt gift you received on your birthday this year.

But I know that if you don't love me, you will never love me.

To you, I'm just a fluffy, talking, pleasing bird.

I am greedy for the golden cage you gave me, and the corn and golden rice you gave me as alms. I wagged my tail and tried my best to please you, just to keep your eyes on me for a while.

I look at you with reverence all the time, and regard you as an unparalleled hero in the world.

You take it for granted that I love you so much that you saved me.

As everyone knows, the person who hurt me the most and the most is you.

If it weren't for you, I would go to the old gentleman's house in the village to study like all schoolchildren of the right age. I can read, and maybe I can get a job in the exam.

Without you, I would marry a wife and have children like a normal man.My wife will be as gentle as my mother.

Without you, I could have spent my life doing nothing and living peacefully.

But it was fate in this life that I became an accidental victim when you consolidated your imperial power.

Just like an ant trampled to death by a horse's hoof when charging forward.

Although I hate you, I have to admit that I also fell in love with you at a certain moment in the past ten years.

The favor of a king like a tide is too tempting. I am a secular person, how can I not be tempted?

Countless times, I want to let go of this, and enjoy everything that I should enjoy most as an emperor's favorite.

Fortunately, I have seen all kinds of men, and they all have more or less affectionate style.

I think you are no exception.

In order not to make myself too miserable, I chose to avoid it.

On the rainy night you left, I laughed for a long time.

Because you died at the hands of me, the most humble male favorite, and I told you all the words I kept in my heart before you left.

Your eyes are full of shock, astonishment, and inconceivability, but there is no guilt.

As an emperor, have you ever thought about how many miserable mes will be created by the [-] innocent lives killed by you?

Under the permanent shrine in the palace, you may be able to hold back so many innocent souls?

On the rainy night you left, I also left.

I knew I could have gotten away with it and lived whatever life I wanted.

But with you gone, I, a plaything born of you, has no point in continuing to live.

Everyone regarded me as a martyr to die, so I got a thick coffin, and there were incense candles in front of my soul.

Everyone says: Those who live together and die together will surely be able to continue their relationship in the next life.

But I don't want to be with you anymore.

You owed too many people in your previous life, and there will be a long line of people looking for you to collect debts in your next life, so I won't go to collect them.

You and I are cleared up.