The selfish gene

Driving Zheng Jieyuan's car back to Flying City, no one said a word all the way.

I can feel that my spirit is getting more and more tense, and every second is closer to the limit than the last.The shoulders fluctuated with the breathing and brought the pain to all parts of the body. The air conditioner was blowing the slightly damp clothes, and the body was getting colder and colder. As soon as I got back to Ji Chenfeng's house, I couldn't wait to rush into the bathroom.

After taking off his clothes, the mirror reflected the hideous brand on his body.

It may be due to soaking in water, the wound is more red and swollen than when it was just scalded, and the normal skin squeezes the damaged skin, making the hexagram pattern no longer clear.

so ugly.

Those scars on my back are hard for me to see on weekdays. As long as others don't mention them, I won't always think of their existence.But this brand is different, it is too conspicuous.

Maybe this is Shi Hao's purpose, every time I see it, I think of the humiliation I received today.

The nails dug into the skin, scratching the red and swollen wound.I can't find a more convenient tool, so I can only use such a simple and crude way to destroy the pattern I just branded.

I didn't stop sweating until the brand mark became bloody.

Anyway, not so ugly.Looking at the wound that looked more and more miserable in the mirror, I thought with the spirit of Ah Q.

Since the wound hurts when it comes into contact with hot water, I almost finished the shower with cold water.This also caused the body not only to not heat up after taking a bath, but to become colder.

Under the continuous washing of cold water, the wound quickly lost its color.I didn't dry off, put on my clothes wet, and left the bathroom. I crawled into my bed exhausted, wrapped my body completely in a blanket, and didn't even expose my head.

The sound of the microwave oven was heard from the kitchen. After a while, the small room was filled with the smell of food, which smelled like instant noodles.

Ji Chenfeng doesn't have the habit of eating late at night, so this should be his first meal tonight.

Zheng Jieyuan, although he was sincere enough to treat his friends, he was not careful in his actions.In the afternoon, the two of them were at the pet hospital. Ji Chenfeng knew best if he had eaten or not, so couldn't he buy something to cushion his stomach on the way?

Whether it is the pain in the body or what happened tonight, it is destined to be a sleepless night.I covered my head and lay on my side. It looked like I was asleep, but I was actually paying attention to the movement of Ji Chenfeng behind me.

From the kitchen into the bedroom, from the bedroom into the bathroom.After half an hour, he came out of the bathroom with a burst of soapy hot air.

I thought he was going back to the bedroom to sleep, but he stopped right behind me.

He is looking at me.

"I know you're not asleep."

I opened my eyes, and a faint light came in from the gap in the blanket, and the cocoon-like space was dim and stuffy.

"Sang Nian, I don't want to continue like this. You can move out tomorrow."

Pulling down the blanket, I blinked blankly at the wall in front of me, and it took me a long time to find my voice.

"...But, I haven't found a house yet."

"You can stay in a hotel first, or live with Zheng Jieyuan."

He didn't want to give me another chance.

From the moment he allowed me to live in his house, I knew he was loose.They clearly agreed to only stay for one night, but they didn't chase me away the next day when I didn't leave, and they said they could let me stay until I found a house.

How can I find a house if I don't give me the key or let me go out?

When Meng Xueyan said that he could introduce cheap houses to me, he didn't respond, as if he completely forgot that the "friend" I was renting was himself.When I saw Zheng Jieyuan, I didn't even remember the lie I had told about "I have no friends anymore".

Just like this, he acquiesced in allowing me to live under the same roof with him, hating me, but at the same time couldn't help being soft-hearted towards me.

I know all this.

But now he says he doesn't want to continue like this.

He didn't want to convince himself to forgive me anymore, he didn't want to judge whether my words could be trusted, and he didn't want to have any contact with me anymore.

Because I'm angry with him?

Because I made him angry?

"...Okay." I said calmly, "I will move out tomorrow."

After receiving my clear answer, Ji Chenfeng didn't say anything more. After a while, the living room lights dimmed and the bedroom door closed gently.

I looked at the darkness in front of me, and felt that the darkness was bottomless, like an invisible big mouth, which would swallow me in the next second.

He wrapped himself even tighter in the blanket and curled up his knees. It was clear that it was scorching hot, but his body felt cold for no reason.

I thought I would not be able to fall asleep, but then my body gradually heated up, and my consciousness became less clear.

Accidentally spilled food on the ground.

"Tsk." The woman who couldn't see her face walked against the light and pulled me off the chair.

Slapping my body hard, she forced me to kneel before the spilled food.

"Eat all the ones that fall on the ground, or I will make you look good!"

I bit my lip, picked up a piece of pumpkin and stuffed it into my mouth. The woman slapped me on the back of the head again, and my whole body fell to the ground due to inertia.

"Who told you to use your hands? Lick like a dog!"

Tears pooled in his eyes, crumbling.But because I was too scared, afraid that my random actions would cause more beatings and scolding, so even crying was trembling and I didn't dare to speak loudly.

He bent down and licked the ground like a puppy, not daring to stop when he couldn't eat.

The woman walked away temporarily, and I breathed a sigh of relief, but the matter was far from over.

Maybe children have poor muscle control, or I really ate too much, I choked up, my stomach was overwhelmed, and I actually vomited out what I just ate.

The stomach was still twitching, and a deeper fear had already hit my heart.

I hurriedly went to see the woman, only to find that she was walking towards me angrily.

"I was wrong..." I cried and begged for mercy, picked up the food on the ground and stuffed it into my mouth, "Mom, don't be angry... Mom, don't be angry..."

"Who is your mother? You dead child, you find me something to do every day."

She cursed and grabbed my arm and pushed me down on the chair.

Premonitioning what was about to happen, I struggled violently and begged for mercy even harder: "I was wrong...it was all my fault...I'm sorry...I will never do this again..."

The clothes on my back were lifted up, and the sharp heat fell on my waist. I screamed, and tears fell on the floor one by one.

In addition to the nanny, there are also cooks and gardeners in the family, but the woman is very smart and never lays hands on me when there are other people.

It is useless to beg, and no one listens to help.

I knew the pain and the fear, but I didn't know it was "abuse".After all, my life has been like this since I became conscious.

Xu Xi noticed it because it was too hot that time, on my buttocks. She came to see me and found that my walking posture was very strange, and I was still unwilling to sit down.The woman told her that I was too naughty to jump down the stairs and accidentally hurt my leg.Xu Xi was only a 15-year-old girl back then, so she believed it was true and didn't pursue it further.

It was spring at that time, and the flowers in the garden were in full bloom.Xu Xi led me to the garden alone to enjoy the flowers, but the woman didn't follow.

When admiring a peach blossom that was in full bloom, Xu Xi wanted to hug me up and take a closer look, but as soon as he hugged me, I avoided it.

"pain."

Xu Xi looked at my leg with some concern, and asked, "Where did you fall, have you seen a doctor?"

I shook my head and pointed to my butt: "It hurts here."

Although Xu Xi is young, he already has the self-awareness of an elder. Hearing this, he would take my pants off regardless of whether it was in broad daylight or not.

When the hideous wound was exposed in front of her eyes, the woman's crimes that had not been exposed for several years were revealed to the world.

Xu Xi said that I am well-behaved and brave because when I face pain, I don't make noise, cry, or feel wronged.But she doesn't know, I have cried, quarreled, and wronged a long time ago, but... no one cares.

Tears are the most useless.I have understood this truth since I was a child.It cannot be my weapon, it cannot be my shield, and it cannot be cherished by anyone.

It hurts so bad I can't sleep...

What time does it light up?Is dad coming back tomorrow?With him around, "Mom" wouldn't hit me.

"Sang Nian... Sang Nian..."

I don't know if it's dry water or sweat on my body. It's humid and hot, and even my eyelashes seem to be covered with drops of water.

I blinked, the picture in front of me was hazy and broken, only a vague figure could be seen.

"I'm in so much pain..."

Deja vu... It seemed to be the same last time, being discovered by this person and hugged by this person.

Just hold him and all pain will disappear and every tear will be answered.

That was the first time anyone heard my cries for help.

"Where does it hurt?"

My palm caressed my sweaty cheek and neck, as if I wanted to tear off my tightly wrapped quilt to examine carefully, but I grabbed my hand and firmly pressed it back to my cheek.

"It hurts everywhere..." Half of my lips were imprinted on Ji Chenfeng's palm, I breathed hotly, and liquid kept leaking from my eyes, "I'm dying of pain."

Everything in front of me seemed to be spinning, and my mind became muddled. I could only close my eyes and hold his hand even tighter.

A sigh came from next to my ear: "I can't move with you like this, let me go first." Maybe seeing that I didn't cooperate, his voice became softer, "Hey, don't cry, I won't leave."

Although the consciousness is blurred, the trust in him is deeply rooted in my heart.I made a vague "hmm", loosened my hand a little bit, and moved it to the pillow. I obediently did not make any resistance.

The blanket on his body was gently lifted, and suddenly, the other party's movements froze, and he couldn't even hear the sound of breathing.A few seconds later, he quickly unbuttoned me, as if he was eager to find out some answer, but when he opened the clothes on his chest, he became cautious again.Be careful, like a dangerous wasp on my lapel.

The wound was glued to the material of the clothing, and it hurt so much that he had to peel it off very hard.Because almost as soon as he exerted force, I would tremble uncontrollably and let out suppressed sobs from my throat.

"Why didn't you tell me when you were hurt?" Finally seeing my wound clearly, he wiped away the tears from the corners of my eyes with his thumb, his tone was as gentle as a snowflake - when it fell on my heart, there would be a moment of coolness and refreshment, but waiting for you I want to go back and treasure it, but I can no longer find traces of his gentleness.

When was the last time I heard him talk to me like that?

Feeling that Ji Chenfeng got up and left me, I opened my eyes suddenly, trying to reach for his clothes, but I couldn't.

With his back to me, he rummaged through the drawers of the living room cabinet, and finally found a red emergency medical kit.

"It might hurt a little."

Breaking off a povidone iodine cotton swab, he gently pressed it on my wound when one end was filled with reddish-brown liquid.

It was really painful, so painful that I started to hide subconsciously.

Ji Chenfeng quickly put his other hand on my shoulder, and comforted me: "It will be fine soon, just keep going..."

Blowing on the wound, he treated the wound for me in a very professional and quick way.

Putting on sterile gauze, he touched my forehead, turned around and poured a glass of water back.Let me sit in his arms, he gave me a capsule first, and asked me to take it: "It reduces inflammation and fever, your fever is a bit severe." After I took it, he quickly fed me a few sips of water.

The clothes on my body were all soaked, and the blanket couldn't cover me, so he simply picked me up and moved me to his bedroom inside.

As soon as the floor after sleeping for a long time touched the soft mattress, the sore bones seemed to be comforted and became less uncomfortable.

Stripped off my clothes, stuffed me into a thin quilt, and wrapped me up tightly.After doing all this, Ji Chenfeng turned around and wanted to leave, but this time I was finally caught.

"Don't drive me away..." I held his hand, completely showing weakness, "I will never quarrel with you again... Lock me up, put me in shackles, treat me whatever you want... I As long as you are enough...as long as you are alone..."

If you haven't been cherished by others, you won't know how bad your life is; if you haven't been warmed by others, you won't be greedy for the other person's temperature.

I don't want to do this anymore, I can't take it anymore.How could this person cut off our connection so ruthlessly after treating me so tenderly?