[Zhongyingmei] The clown is actually me

Batman is gone.

Jack sighed, and glanced at the place he had pointed to Batman.

"I'm sorry, he's always been so impersonal, like a wall, between me and ordinary people." The clown's signature strange tone, "Now that I think about it, he is really ruthless to me, he hates me, It is inevitable to empathize with you, but I hope you don't blame him."

There was no one around, and Harry was still awake.Jack's eyes moved down, and the clown—the hallucination of the clown, was sitting on the sofa not far away, humming a song, and he was wearing a purple tuxedo with strange taste.His green hair was disheveled like withered grass, and his pale skin was like lifeless dead bark, tightly attached to a layer of bulging muscles. Under the light, it was frighteningly bright, as if emitting milky white fluorescence.There are not many pieces of flesh on the man's body, and the outline of raised bones can be seen in some places. There are only a few ribs, making one wonder whether the skin is directly attached to the bones.

"Are you my fantasy?"

"I am your fantasy? No, no, honey, it doesn't matter which of us is who. Do you think about the chicken or the egg? We are each other's fantasy, and we have never sinned in our lives. A normal person who used to be a normal person occasionally fantasizes that he is a super criminal, as if this is so powerful, the delusion of a lunatic is that he thinks he is a normal person.” The clown approached and pointed his forehead with a pale finger, “Then, Who are you? Are you an unlucky soul who was haplessly stuffed into my body? Or is it another me who has been drugged and lost part of my past memory? Or are you just a sudden birth Personality, my sick brain was severed left and right, so now there are two people in this body?"

Jack closed his eyes and chose to remain silent.

"Oh, dear dear dear, don't be like this, open your eyes and look at me." The clown begged pretendingly, "I can give you something you like! Just like your props..."

The heavy texture of the handcuffs suddenly disappeared, and Jack felt someone holding his hand in the dark, and he was led to walk forward. At the same time, the peculiar disinfectant smell of the infirmary disappeared, and was replaced by a characteristic smell of chemicals. pungent taste.

He opened his eyes and looked around. This was not the infirmary of the Arkham Asylum. He was standing on the crude high-altitude path paved with iron nets. Under his feet were many huge chemical buckets. Huge bubbles one after another, heat waves in the air, mixed with a strong pungent smell of chemicals, almost made Jack burst into tears.He took a few steps forward and saw a man standing not far away.

The man was wearing a black suit, like a head waiter of a high-end restaurant, and what was even more striking was that he had a red hood on his head, which looked like an enlarged half of a pill.

Red Hood!

The origin of the clown described in the well-known comic "Deadly Joke", the clown was originally an unpopular comedian who participated in a robbery in order to support his pregnant wife, but was told that his wife had died due to an electrical leakage from the furniture before the operation began.Unable to quit the crime, he is forced to act as Red Hood, the leader of the Red Hood Gang.When confronted by Batman, he panicked, stepped on the ground, and fell into a vat of chemicals.The strong corrosiveness of the chemicals made his skin pale and his body hair green. In desperation, this ordinary man fell into madness, and finally became the most terrifying criminal clown in Gotham City.

Jack's heart trembled, and he hurried forward a few steps. The news alarmed Red Hood, whose accomplice was shot dead by the police from the ACE Chemical Factory. He was so frightened that even the slightest movement made his hair stand on end.Jack knew what was going to happen next, and he didn't dare to approach, but shouted loudly: "Get out of there, the railing there is not stable!"

"What are you talking about...don't arrest me! Wait a minute! I'm innocent, really, I didn't expect to follow them to kill, I can prove that I'm not..." The red hood spoke incoherently, stepping back step by step, the metal hood Restricting his vision, everything he saw was bright red, which aggravated his fear.The later clown is just an ordinary person here, his tone is extremely timid, and the ending is trembling: "Please stay away from me, I was just forced by them, if you don't believe me, I can prove it..."

As he spoke, he went to take off the metal cover on his head. Jack secretly thought that it was not good. The place where the red hood was located was corroded by the poisonous gas evaporated from chemicals. It seemed that it might collapse at any time, so he rushed forward , hoping to catch Red Hood before something unfortunate happens.However, no one expected how deadly this move would be. Red Hood screamed loudly, and rushed to the side to avoid him. The rickety railing obviously couldn't bear the weight of a grown man. Jack heard a toothache The sound of metal breaking.

He stretched out his hand, but he couldn't catch the red hood. Their fingertips brushed against each other. In mid-air, the sound of a heavy object falling into a liquid was so soft, like a spring breeze blowing a flower to the ground.

Jack leaned against the dilapidated railing and looked down, hoping to see the figure of the red hood soaked in the liquid, but there was nothing, only bubbles constantly bubbling on the surface of the boiling chemical waste liquid.

He suddenly woke up, and the clown stood behind him, like the cross carried by Jesus.

"No one can see foresight," the clown laughed softly and coldly, "fools and wise men are equally behind-the-sighted."

The golden-red chemical waste liquid was boiling hot, and the sunset-like light illuminated the faces of all the people present, two identical faces.

"Is this your memory?" Jack said blankly. "Are you asking me to read this because you want me to pity you? Let me know that you've had such a bad day that it's reasonable for you to go crazy?"

He stood up, faced the clown, and faced the man who was laughing maniacally and hideously like a ghost. It was like facing a mirror. The flames flickered on and off, reflecting the two people like two ghosts facing each other: "The clown , there are many people in this world, they have a very bad past like you, and they are crushed physically and mentally by fate like you, but they will never be depraved like you, madness is by no means human nature, it is to control your madness .”

The clown was not angry. Instead, he licked the corner of his mouth and said with a sneer: "Honey, you don't understand, you still don't understand. You have never experienced anything, and your soul is as pure as a piece of white paper, so you are high above but you've been through it all, you're the uncorrupted part of me, and your presence fascinates me. I don't blame you, but I have to correct you, I never needed anyone to pity me, Whoever pities me will look down on me!"

The clown opened his hands, and under the dim light, he looked like a dark, slender cross. He was very proud, and hummed an unknown tune. He kicked the heeled shoes on the floor, dancing, like an LSD addict. of mentally ill patients.The sound of the tumbling liquid was worse than the devil's murmur, and the lights were flickering to hide it. Jack saw many pairs of eyes in the gap between opening and closing his eyes, eyes of old people, children, girls, women... countless The eyes stared at him layer upon layer, the dilated pupils seemed to have everything and nothing at all.Life and death are intertwined, from light to darkness, it turns out to be blank.

"You think I hate Batman? Hate him for not catching me? Hate him for not saving me? No no no, I'm grateful to him, I'm very, very grateful to him. He made me—not all of me. He made me I saw another possibility: Is it possible that the first 20 years of your life were meaningless? When you were born, God only brought your body into the world, and there was never a soul in this body?" The clown relied on On the railing of the chemical factory, the tone of voice is like singing, "This is what I am, I finally understand, I have been wasting my life for 28 years. I know that day I fell into the chemical pool, and the chemical liquid wrapped me like a mother. The amniotic fluid in my stomach, from where my soul was born! The feeling of being truly alive is better than all the lives I have experienced before. I tell you, I hate no one, I only hate myself, why am I deserted The first half of my life?! Why didn't I go crazy earlier?!"

"You..." Jack stared at him, "You're completely crazy."

The clown looked back at him, his green pupils were hollow and smooth, without love or hatred.

"I'm not crazy, I'm sane. I don't know if you have the feeling that your boring life exists for a moment, and God says 'Let there be light!' and He is the light that shines on you. When When you met him, you felt that your life was lit up, and your life was full of meaning from then on. You suddenly changed from an ordinary person to a philosopher, and you discussed with him day and night, in order to prove yourself to each other. Fighting life and death, an ancient sage in the East once said, 'If you hear the truth in the morning, you will die in the evening'." The clown is still eloquent.

"You mean Batman?"

The clown suddenly stopped his long speech, he looked at Jack absent-mindedly, there was nothing in his sour green eyes, but he seemed to have everything.Affection, pain, sorrow, hatred, anger, pity... all kinds of emotions flashed in his eyes one by one, at this moment he suddenly became more sensitive than everyone else, more emotional than the best artist in the world , that horrible and strange face even shone with the radiance of the kindness of Heavenly Father or Jesus.

"No, it's you."

Jack's eyes widened.

"Because you think I'm you?"

"You think you are me?"

The clown lowered his head, his bony shoulder blades shrugged, and he started laughing again, louder and louder, until the roof was about to fall off, Jack's words were like the funniest joke he had ever heard in his life, he laughed so hard Rolling all over the floor.There is no pride and joy in the laughter, it is sharp and cold, and there is no emotion that human beings should have. It is the laughter of the devil in hell, like the brimstone fire that destroys the world.

"Honey, darling, darling! How can you be me? I'm just crazy, and you're not, and you can't be even if you want to be! If you were, there would be no point in the story, and nothing to look forward to. Don't listen to their bullshit, you're not mentally ill, you're normal, you're a normal person. You were never me!" The clown growled, his voice hoarse.

Jack was suddenly blessed, and stepped forward to embrace him. The man was standing by the railing, staggering. He was afraid that he would fall into the chemical pool again if he stumbled: "Are you the one who believes that I will change my mind and stop doing evil?"

"it's me."

"why?"

"You only matter if you're not me. This story only matters."

Jack was silent: "Whether I am meaningful or not is not defined in this way."

"You are still too young, but I have seen your fate, just like that unfortunate bat. The world is always similar, and fate never favors anyone because of their kindness. On the contrary, they are favored by their noble character Take on more." The clown hugged Jack tightly, just like the grief-stricken Apollo embraced him and turned into Laurel's lover, "Jack, how can I save you? How can I save you from the blame of fate, I really want you to escape from here, but you will come back. Gotham is a bad mother, she will not allow her children to leave her. If you can't take it one day, just run away to me, and I will help you deal with everything .”

"Why?" Jack asked again.

"Why are there always so many reasons? Because I love you, no matter what you are, whether it's a ghost or a personality, even if you're just my fantasy, a dream I have before going to bed, a bubble that can be popped... What I'm saying is, whatever you are, I love you dearly. I just want you to see, to make you understand that there are only two roads ahead of you from the beginning to the end. One of them leads to me and the other. "

It was unbelievable, the hug was so sincere and so full of emotion, Jack faced the burning love surging inside him, it was like holding the sun in his arms.And the man who hugged him once slaughtered wantonly in Gotham City, laughed wildly and played with his vicious plan, and did things that even the devil would be willing to bow down to, but when he came before him, he suddenly showed the mercy of a saint, and he could even Fall in love with a dead leaf on the side of the road.

"—leads to death."

The clown hugged him tightly, turned his body sideways, and the two fell down together. The narrow chemical plant suddenly turned into an endless abyss. During the endless fall, the voice in Jack's throat became the sound of wind: "Joker, you what do you want?"

"What do I want? I don't know, maybe I want you to go to hell with me." The clown giggled, "Maybe I just want to dance with you."