I Can't Be This Protagonist

It was snowing heavily outside the window.

Inside the window, the cold atmosphere between the two became warmer because of the snow. Ji Yao sat by the bed, gently stroking Yan Shuang's face with his fingers.

Yan Shuang asked calmly, "Where have you been for the past half month?"

"Take care of something."

"How long are you going to keep me locked up?"

Ji Yao stopped touching his cheek, looked down at the soft outline of Yan Shuang's side face in the dark, and said after a moment of silence: "Forever."

Yan Shuang smiled, "A lifetime is so long, you must have talked too much."

"I said for a lifetime, for a lifetime."

"why?"

Ji Yao is also asking himself: Why?Why do you have to hold on to this person?

The answer is looming, like a layer of fog, thick and dark fog, maybe you can lift it with your hand, maybe you can never get out.

"do not know."

The atmosphere in the room seemed to turn cold again because of these three words.

Yan Shuang turned his face away, avoiding Ji Yao's fingers, retracted his head into the bed, and buried himself in it.

Ji Yao sat by the bed for a while, seeing Yan Shuang wrapped in the quilt without moving, he stretched out his hand to pull the quilt, wanting him to come out for some air, but Yan Shuang grabbed the quilt and refused to let go, the more Ji Yao pulled him The quilt, he wrapped it tighter and harder.

After the last bit of quilt in his palm was also torn away, Ji Yao glanced at his empty palm, closed his palm into a fist, and stood up after lightly thumping his knee. As soon as he got up, Yan Shuang, who was hiding under the quilt, said sullenly : "Are you leaving again?"

Ji Yao stood beside the bed without saying a word.

He didn't mean not to answer Yan Shuang, he was just thinking about it.

While he was meditating, Yan Shuang lifted the quilt. The "tug of war" just now made his hair a little messy, and his eyes were still surprisingly bright in the dark, "You want to torture me to death, don't you?"

Ji Yao was slapped with such a big hat by him, and his brows were slightly furrowed, "What nonsense."

"In such a big house, I am the only living person in the whole building. Don't mention those servants to me. They are all like ghosts, haunting and haunting. Even if they meet each other, they are all dumb. Seeing me is like seeing me." Like a ghost, I can hide as far as I can, for the past half month, I don't even have anyone to talk to!"

The more Yan Shuang talked, the more excited he got, he stood up straight from the bed, leaned over and grabbed Ji Yao by the collar, his eyes stared at Ji Yao like a hungry wolf, and his indifferent appearance in the hot spring swimming pool in the evening finally dissipated in the night Without a trace, "I understand, you want me to only talk to you and see you alone, you pervert! Crazy! Ji Yao! I'll fuck your eight generations of ancestors!"

After he finished cursing, he lowered his head and kissed Ji Yao's lips fiercely.

It's a kiss, it's more like a beast-like gnawing.

He bit Ji Yao's lips hard, sucking the blood and smell on Ji Yao's lips like a vampire.

With his hands behind his back, Ji Yao suddenly realized what he had done to Yan Shuang.

If a person is locked up in a building for a long time, he will go crazy.

Several overlapping images flashed in my mind, pills, blades, confusion and hysterical cries.

There was a tingling flicker at the nerve endings, and at the same time another of his nerves flickered with excitement.

Ji Yao frowned slightly, and then returned to his usual appearance.

Ji Yao put his arms around Yan Shuang, stroked his back gently, and sprayed his breath warmly on Yan Shuang's face. He stood quietly and let Yan Shuang tear his lips until Yan Shuang had vented enough, he said: " Sorry, I didn't mean to."

The thin body half knelt and leaned against him.

Ji Yao felt a little heat flow down his neck into his shirt.

"Don't go..." Yan Shuang's voice became weak, "Hold me..."

Ji Yao has not seen Yan Shuang so helpless for a long time. He lowered his eyelashes and looked at the person leaning on his shoulders. Yan Shuang was holding his collar and looking up at him, his eyes and expression were pitiful Seeing Ji Yao looking at him, he moved his lips closer, lightly pecked and kissed Ji Yao's blood-stained lips, and whispered, "Does it hurt?"

Ji Yao looked at him quietly, with a dim and inexplicable light shining in his eyes.

Seeing that he was indifferent, Yan Shuang's eyes filled with mist, like a small animal, and even kissed his chin with some flattery, "Don't leave tonight, okay?"

The Adam's apple rolled up and down, Ji Yao hugged him with one arm, and laid him flat on the bed, Yan's arms were tightly wrapped around his arms, begging: "Don't go, stay with me."

"I do not go."

The affirmative answer made Yan Shuang relax a little.

Next, Ji Yao did as he said and lay beside Yan Shuang. He put him in his arms and gently stroked Yan Shuang's black hair, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to leave you alone."

Yan Shuang huddled in his arms, her body trembling slightly.

"Are you leaving tomorrow?"

"Don't go."

"What about the day after tomorrow?"

"Not going either."

"..."

Ji Yao kept his promise. In the next few days, he and Yan Shuang will be almost inseparable. No matter what he does, he will remain in Yan Shuang's sight. How can I live?"

Until the seventh day, Ji Yao disappeared again.

Yan Shuang: The scumbag is gone, he has a showdown, he will stop pretending, and he will come to a beautiful solitary life!

Yan Shuang continued to eat and drink every day in the small villa, watched TV and played games, pretended to be autistic by the way, and occasionally dropped something to get crazy.

He guessed that the camera in this villa was more thoughtful than Wei Yichen.

However, he basically plays in his true colors, and there is not much pressure.

Rounding up, isn't this equivalent to retirement?

Yan Shuang once again praised his decision to arrange Ji Yao at the end.

He is so wise!

After more than ten days of "retirement" life, Ji Yao finally reappeared in the evening.

This time, Yan Shuang didn't even "pretend" to be calm and breezy, and rushed downstairs, pounced on Ji Yao the moment he opened the car door.

The warm body rushed into his arms, Ji Yao hugged the person with one hand, and said softly: "Why did you run out with so little clothes on?"

Yan Shuang didn't say a word, but hugged him more tightly with both hands. He was tightly wrapped around him, like a dodder wrapped around a parasitic plant.

Ji Yao picked him up by the waist, and entered the small villa facing the snowflakes.

This time Yan Shuang's reaction was stronger than the first time.

He clung to Ji Yao, without saying a word, and refused to leave him for a moment, with his cheek pressed against Ji Yao's shirt, and the tip of his nose greedily sniffing his scent.

Ji Yao hugged him and sat down by the fireplace, stroking his back tenderly, "What's wrong?"

Yan Shuang didn't speak, but stuck to him tightly.

The firelight in the fireplace danced, stretching the shadows of the two people for a long and weird time. Ji Yao's fair face was half-bright in the firelight, and he didn't speak anymore. Back... like comforting a lost child.

After a long time, Yan Shuang seemed to finally calm down in his embrace. He grabbed Ji Yao's shirt, raised his head, and said with a pitiful expression, "You lied to me, you said you wouldn't leave."

"It happened suddenly," Ji Yao said lightly, "I need to deal with it myself."

"...then let me go..."

Ji Yao caressed his hair lightly, trying to push him away and get up, Yan Shuang immediately hugged him tightly, as if trying to embed himself into his flesh and blood, "Don't go, don't go..."

Ji Yao didn't leave.

Yan Shuang couldn't do without him.

The line of sight is not enough either.

He would hold his hand even when taking a bath, staring at him cautiously and cautiously with eyes that were afraid that he would run away, as if he was extremely precious to him.

Because of that look, Ji Yao couldn't help kissing Yan Shuang.

Yan Shuang huddled in the bathtub, his body was snow-white and his hair was black. Ji Yao looked at his wet eyes and thought: He really looks like a little mermaid who was forced to go ashore.

Ji Yao stayed with Yan Shuang for another week. One night, after feeding Yan Shuang the milk to help him sleep, he repeated his old tricks and disappeared again.

In fact, he was just another spare house in the woods, only three or ten minutes' drive from the villa.

But for Yan Shuang, as long as he wants to step out of the villa, there will be bodyguards leading the hounds to persuade him to leave immediately.

Ji Yao sat in the spare room and drank.

There are two shotguns hanging on the wall, interlaced to form an X shape.

While drinking, he looked at the two shotguns.

The alcohol heats up his body and brings out more of his buried thoughts.

"You really don't look like me."

Strangely enough, both his parents said this to him.

Before committing suicide, his mother invited him to die with him, and when he refused, she said that in disappointment.

His dad repeated that phrase every moment he was growing up.

So... who is he like?

Under the shotgun is a huge screen. On the screen, a thin man is sitting in front of the TV and staring blankly at the screen, holding the remote control in his palm. He has been watching it for almost an hour without moving, and his expression is not so much Concentration, rather than sluggishness.

Ji Yao's heart felt a strange pleasure amidst a strange pain.

He is trying to control a person.

It's sinful.

...but he won't stop.

Yan Shuang watched "Postpartum Care of Sows" for two hours.

Very insightful.

He is confident that he can be a qualified farmer!

Ji Yao has disappeared for more than half a month this time, and if he doesn't come back, he should watch the crop hybridization series.

Both agriculture and animal husbandry, he is invincible.

Ji Yao stayed in the spare room for a full month, and he was the same every day. Except for work, he hardly talked to anyone, but just faced the screen and looked at Yan Shuang quietly.

Sometimes he also wonders whether he is controlling Yan Shuang or Yan Shuang is controlling him.

He recalled the days when he met Yan Shuang, and came to the conclusion objectively——Yan Shuang had already tried to control him.

It was too late for him to wake up.

Ever since the first snowfall on the mountain, the snow has never stopped. Against the heavy snow in the evening, Ji Yao drove an off-road vehicle through the forest. The closer he got to the villa, the faster his heart beat.

Something he had always loathed was waking up in his blood.

He exhausted all his will to resist, but was still lured to the opposite of what he wanted.

White snow surrounded his car and sent him to his destination.

When the small villa appeared in sight, the door had already been pushed open.

Yan Shuang ran out of the villa barefoot.

The bodyguards led the hounds to stop him, so like a poor prey, he was surrounded by several hounds, hugged his shoulders, and stretched out his hand helplessly in the direction of Ji Yao's vehicle with tears in his eyes.

Look, how easy it is to control a person, there seems to be a contemptuous and proud voice in his ears.

Much like his father's voice.

Ji Yao got out of the car and walked towards Yan Shuang who was squatting and crying.

It's pathetic, but that's the cutest thing about him, isn't it?

Ji Yao walked over and stretched out his arm to Yan Shuang. Ji Yao embraced Yan Shuang and closed his eyes deeply.

——It turned out...it was his own voice.