Time makes you fall

◎Hate◎

When that familiar voice sounded from a distance, Zhu Yao was startled, and dodged to hide in a dark corner by the flower bed.

"Is it this way? There are signs here."

"Ah yes yes yes."

"Hurry up, it's so cold, it's so cold even though it hasn't snowed."

The rustling footsteps of a group of people made Zhu Yao hide a little deeper in the darkness, with his fingers grabbing a belt hanging from the hem of the down jacket.

She watched Shang Xiaoran, Tang Nuo, and three or four friends of Shang Xiaoran walking over together.

Walking through the flower beds, through the fountains that do not spray water in winter, through the exotic floor tiles, to the front of Qu Qingcheng's house.

Ring the doorbell.

There were few people in the community during the New Year's Day holiday, but now it was almost twelve o'clock in the middle of the night, and the winter night was cold, and there were not many people walking around in the community.

Of course, Shang Xiaoran and the others did not expect that there was someone hiding in the corner of the flower bed. Zhu Yao stood quietly and was able to look at Shang Xiaoran's back without any restraint.

Shang Xiaoran is wearing a pink and purple down jacket today, which is a bit like the dress that Zhu Yinglan bought her for the New Year. Of course, there are no exaggerated puff sleeves and collar frills. The simple style conceals part of the childishness of the color.

The slightly curly maroon ponytail swayed behind her head, shining brightly in the dark night.

Zhu Yao guessed right, Shang Xiaoran can control the color of pink and purple, it doesn't look abrupt on her body at all, on the contrary, it looks more cute and cute, and the beaming look is very suitable for the New Year.

Unlike Zhu Yao himself, who is always wrapped in a black bread down jacket, hiding in a dark corner for fear that people will see him, like an unpleasant moldy bread.

Soon the door of Qu Qingcheng's house opened.

Shang Xiaoran and the others greeted with a smile: "Teacher Qu!" "Hello, Teacher Qu!"

Qu Qingcheng also smiled: "Is the journey safe? Have you greeted your parents before going out?"

"Oh, Teacher Qu, why does your teacher always think that we are in the second grade of elementary school instead of the second grade of high school?"

Qu Qingcheng said: "After all, it's very late now, because it's the New Year's Day holiday, I made an exception to let you play so late. It's only this time. You can't usually do it. Do your homework early and go to bed!"

"I know Mr. Qu, didn't you call us to come to your house because you were afraid that it would be unsafe for us to go to a place with many other people to watch the fireworks?" Shang Xiaoran grinned.

"Alright, don't stand and talk at the door." Qu Qingcheng let the door open: "Is it cold outside? Come in."

Then, there was a squeak.

The door of Qu Qingcheng's house was closed forever to Zhu Yao who was hiding by the dark flower bed.

The only warm yellow light in the boundless dark night disappeared forever before Zhu Yao's eyes.

What was that feeling like?Like on a remote mountain, the human team going to hunt down the ancient dragon held the torch in their hands and yelled in a low voice to cheer themselves up.

No matter how uneasy and fearful you are about the future, you can always hold on tightly to the bright and warm torch in your hand.But at this time, a strong wind blew from nowhere, and the torches in everyone's hands were extinguished at the same time.

The only hope left in my heart was gone.

Zhu Yao took a deep breath, feeling that the cold air was like an invisible big hand, clutching her heart achingly.

She took out her phone, looked at it, and then looked again.

Not a single message, not a single phone call.

Qu Qingcheng did not call Zhu Yao, and came to her house to watch the fireworks tonight.

They called Shang Xiaoran, Tang Nuo, and several other girls.

But he didn't call Zhu Yao.

Zhu Yao stuffed the phone back into his pocket.

Why did she feel that she was the most special student to Qu Qingcheng?

Just because Qu Qingcheng remembered the color of her homework, but not Shang Xiaoran's?

But ah.

The more cheerful, cuter, and lovable ones are of course Shang Xiaoran.

Those who are more gloomy, irritable, and unpredictable are those like Zhu Yao.

It is said that when faced with the situation of how many children there are in the family, it is impossible for parents to be completely level. The same is true for teachers, right?With so many students in a class, it is clear at a glance who is more lovable and who is not so cute.

If Zhu Yao stood on the podium by himself, he would prefer Shang Xiaoran's type over his own.

Even if Zhu Yinglan played tricks on Qu Qingcheng's side, Qu Qingcheng only paid so much attention to herself.

Give yourself a lipstick, and after you lose your temper for no reason, you will lose the patience to invite yourself to watch the fireworks at home.

Cranky, anxious, cloudy child.Not cute kids at all.

Zhu Yao sniffed and was about to go back to the captain's house. She wanted to tell Zhou Ang that she was a little unwell and had to leave first, when suddenly the phone in her pocket vibrated.

Zhu Yao was taken aback - Qu Qingcheng couldn't be the one who asked her to go to his house to watch the fireworks right now, right?

When I took it out, it wasn't Qu Qingcheng, but Zhu Yinglan.

"Hey?"

"Has Qi Shengjun, the one who kills thousands of swords, told you anything recently?"

Zhu Yinglan should still be abroad, the signal is a bit bad, so Zhu Yao was baffled by asking all the questions.

"No."

"This heartless..."

Zhu Yinglan cursed and hung up the phone directly.

Zhu Yao held the phone in front of her eyes - there are still 23 minutes before the New Year.

If Zhu Yinglan is still in Thailand, then on her side, there is still one hour and 23 minutes before the New Year.

But when she called, she didn't even remember to say "Happy New Year" to her only daughter, and she didn't give Zhu Yao a chance to say "Happy New Year" to her.

Zhu Yao blinked his eyes in the dark night, and the fireworks lit up in the sky.

A loud "bang" resounded in Zhu Yao's ears, but Zhu Yao felt that the sound was far away.

It seems that the whole body is covered with a membrane, forming a bubble, wrapping myself in it.

There was movement from the small open-air balcony of Qu Qingcheng's house - Qu Qingcheng took Shang Xiaoran and the others upstairs: "Be careful of the steps."

"Is it cold? You have all your clothes pulled up."

"I don't know if the snacks I prepared are what you like." What are you preparing, potato chips, is there any coke.

Zhu Yao put his hand in the pocket of the down jacket, and crushed the fireworks stick that he planned to release with Qu Qingcheng bit by bit.

Now she is standing here, against the background of fireworks, looking up at Qu Qingcheng, she also feels like she is separated by a layer of membrane.

It turned out that everything special was just her own illusion.

Losing Qu Qingcheng's special attention, the carriage turned back into a pumpkin, the glass slipper disappeared, and he was still the gloomy, taciturn and unpleasant self hiding in a dark corner.

Those who thought that the appearance of Qu Qingcheng would bring about changes did not appear at all.

Zhu Yao took one last look and prepared to leave.

At this time, there was another sound of footsteps in the darkness, and Zhu Yao temporarily stood still.

The rustling rhythm of the heels of the boots hitting the ground reminded Zhu Yao of someone, and sure enough, a charming figure in leather clothes appeared in the night.

It's Yang Shenghan.

Always dressed in black leather, with curly long hair draped over one shoulder, as if never afraid of the cold.

Zhu Yao hid in the darkness, watching Yang Shenghan rang the doorbell of Qu Qingcheng's house,

Qu Qingcheng's figure quickly disappeared from the balcony and appeared at the door.

Yang Shenghan smiled and said, "I want to chat with you."

Zhu Yao looked up at the balcony, wondering what Qu Qingcheng told Shang Xiaoran and the others, Shang Xiaoran and the others were not lying on the balcony railing and looking downstairs.

Shang Xiaoran's strong interest in Yang Shenghan that Zhu Yao imagined did not appear.

Qu Qingcheng nodded, and followed Yang Shenghan out.

Yang Shenghan took Qu Qingcheng to a more remote corner, lowered his voice and said something, and Qu Qingcheng seemed to respond to something.

Because of the distance, Zhu Yao could only hear Qu Qingcheng's voice, which seemed to be as gentle as usual. As for what was said, Zhu Yao could not hear it.

She could only stand where she was, her whole body was cold, looking at Yang Shenghan's back, and Qu Qingcheng's figure facing her through the evergreen shrubs in winter.

Because of the distance, Qu Qingcheng's little fair face became more and more blurred.

Zhu Yao saw the next movement very clearly.

She laughed silently in the dark night——

It was a hug between Yang Shenghan and Qu Qingcheng.

For a moment, Zhu Yao felt that all his previous stupid behaviors had turned into a joke.

For example, deliberately getting close to Zhou Ang, for example telling Shang Xiaoran that he likes Zhou Ang, for example refusing Qu Qingcheng's lead role in the play.

She wanted to protect Qu Qingcheng, just like in the "Christmas War" at Christmas, she held a jackhammer to protect Qu Qingcheng.

But does Qu Qingcheng need her protection?She simply forgot to ask.

Even Shang Xiaoran didn't show any excessive interest in Yang Shenghan, everything was just Zhu Yao's imagination.

Everything is just a one-man show directed and acted by Zhu Yao, but she even mistaken the role of the leading role. After acting again and again, it turns out that she is the only one on the stage, wearing a ridiculous clown mask.

She didn't know why she kept smiling, maybe it was the kind of smile condensed on the clown's mask. Seeing Yang Shenghan and Qu Qingcheng quietly separated, Yang Shenghan said something short and left.

Qu Qingcheng, alone with his arms folded, silently walked towards home.

As Qu Qingcheng got closer, her small and fair face became more and more clear in Zhu Yao's sight.But now she looked at Qu Qingcheng through a layer of film, vaguely, and couldn't understand the meaning of the silent expression on Qu Qingcheng's face.

She lost her comprehension.

Originally, she just wanted to hide in the darkness like this, and then walk away quietly after Qu Qingcheng opened the door to go home and his figure disappeared, and never said a word to Qu Qingcheng from then on.

From then on, Qu Qingcheng was just an ordinary teacher, no different from Lao Fang, Lao Zhang and Lao Wang.

From then on, Zhu Yao was just an ordinary student, no different from A, B, C, Ding with vague faces.

but.

Zhu Yao never expected that Zhou Ang would come out to find her.

The flower bed where Zhu Yao is hiding can't be seen from Qu Qingcheng's house, but can be seen from the captain's house.

There were no lights in the neighborhood, Zhou Ang didn't notice Qu Qingcheng's figure who was walking quietly, and shouted to Zhu Yao who was beside the flower bed, "What are you doing, Zhu Yao? Didn't you say you want to watch the fireworks?"

Qu Qingcheng, who was walking slowly with arms folded, raised his head.

Zhu Yao couldn't hide anymore and walked out from the dark corner.

"Zhu Yao?" Qu Qingcheng walked towards Zhu Yao: "Why are you here?"

******

Zhu Yao put his hands in the pockets of his down jacket and looked at Qu Qingcheng opposite.

Qu Qingcheng had a gentle smile on his face, just like usual, looking at you with that smile, as if you were really her most special student.

Zhu Yao bit her lip hard, but she didn't show anything on the outside.

With a cold face, it was still the usual gloomy and reticent Zhu Yao who looked like a gray-black shadow.

"Teacher Qu?" On the contrary, Zhou Ang beside Zhu Yao was very lively: "Why are you here?"

"My home is here."

"Such a coincidence?" Zhou Ang laughed, "Why haven't I heard our captain mention it?"

Qu Qingcheng also laughed: "Oh, you are meeting at Chen Ye's house today, right?"

"Yes, yes, Mr. Qu, do you want to come?"

"I can't, there is a party at my house, and several students have come." Qu Qingcheng looked at Zhu Yao: "Zhu Yao, you..."

Zhu Yao looked down at the floor, the exotic tiles with a black seam in the middle.

"I want to give you a lip balm." Qu Qingcheng said calmly, "But it was accidentally broken yesterday, so I went to buy another one today and give it to you, okay?"

Zhu Yao stared at the black seam. In fact, if you look closely, it is not so straight. It bends a little to the left and a little to the right, like a naturally formed scar, meandering and crawling on a person's heart.

Zhu Yao lowered his head and didn't speak, but Zhou Ang said livelyly: "Wow, Zhu Yao, your teacher is so good, you actually have a New Year's gift, and me, Mr. Qu, do I have any?"

Qu Qingcheng smiled: "Look for your class teacher to take you there."

"why is it like this……"

"No need." Zhu Yao said suddenly.

Qu Qingcheng and Zhou Ang looked at her together.

Zhu Yao suddenly took Zhou Ang's arm: "Teacher Qu, do you know why I broke the lipstick you want to give me yesterday?"

"Well, why?"

Zhu Yao showed the same calm face as Qu Qingcheng just now: "Because I hate you."

Qu Qingcheng looked at her.

Zhu Yao let go of Zhou Ang's arm: "Zhou Ang, please go in first, I have something to say to Teacher Qu."

"Okay, okay." Zhou Ang quickly slipped away.

After a short interval, the sky full of fireworks was set off again, one by one blooming in the dark sky, grand and decisive, like there is no tomorrow.

The fireworks illuminated half of Qu Qingcheng's face, and Qu Qingcheng asked Zhu Yao with fireworks on his hair, his voice seemed far away amidst the banging of the fireworks: "Zhu Yao, you kid..."

"What did you say?"

"You heard me, I hate you." Zhu Yao said, "You actually like women, I... hate you very much."

The romantic and beautiful fireworks enshrine people's pious wishes for the New Year.Zhu Yao doesn't know what time it is, whether the people in the house are starting to count down to the New Year's Eve, whether the host on TV put on a warm smile and starts counting down the seconds, or the moment the hour hand crosses zero. What wishes do people make.

But she has no wishes.

Now, Qu Qingcheng has really become the last person she sees this year, and may also be the first person she sees in the new year.

However, she stood here and said disgusting words to Qu Qingcheng.

There was faint cheers from inside the room, and the fireworks illuminated Qu Qingcheng's astonished and injured face. Zhu Yao's heart twitched, and his fingers tightened around the straps hanging from the hem of the down jacket, picking them back and forth.

In the end, Qu Qingcheng's face returned to calm.

"I see," she said.

"Teacher Qu! Happy New Year!" Shang Xiaoran and the others shouted from the small balcony upstairs, "Why don't you come up?"

Qu Qingcheng turned his head and smiled gently at the upstairs, leaving Zhu Yao with an overly beautiful half of his face.

"Happy New Year." She said to Shang Xiaoran and the others.

"Zhu Yao?" Finally, Shang Xiaoran, who was lying on the railing of the small balcony, saw Zhu Yao: "Why are you here?"

Zhu Yao pointed behind him: "I went to Chen Ye's house with Zhou Ang for a party."

"That……"

"I'm leaving now."

Shang Xiaoran looked down at Zhu Yao condescendingly: "Aren't you going to go with Zhou Ang?"

Zhu Yao silently shook his head.

She won't say a word to Qu Qingcheng in the future, so she doesn't need to continue the play with Zhou Ang.

Zhu Yao put his hands in his pockets and turned to leave. Qu Qingcheng behind him didn't say a word, only the sound of light footsteps.

Qu Qingcheng also left.

******

Until the sound of Qu Qingcheng's footsteps disappeared, Zhu Yao walked quickly in the direction of leaving the community, taking his hands out of the down jacket pocket while walking.

A small wound on the finger.

It's not big, but it's a little deep, and there are bursts of pain in the cold air of winter nights.

In front of Qu Qingcheng just now, Zhu Yao put his hands in his pockets too hastily, feeling a sense of panic as if the army was completely defeated.She completely forgot that there was still a firework stick in her pocket that she wanted to set off with Qu Qingcheng, and she picked it up in a mess by herself.

The originally round tip of the firework stick sharpened, and when Zhu Yao's finger in his pocket was swiped, there was such a wound.

After walking out of the community quickly, Zhu Yao found a trash can on the side of the road, took out the fireworks sticks in his pocket and threw them in.

Suddenly there was a warm touch on the back of the leg.

If you wear thinner pants in spring and autumn, you should still have a fluffy feeling.

Zhu Yao bowed his head.

It was indeed a cat.

A khaki Chinese pastoral cat, wearing a bright pink collar.

Zhu Yao recognized it as the cat raised by the beef noodle shop.

Zhu Yuan took a long look. The door of the beef noodle shop was closed. I don't know where the cat slipped out. It should have its own way.

Zhu Yao whispered, "I'm sorry, I didn't bring anything to eat."

But thinking about it, there is no shortage of cats, showing off at the beef noodle shop during the day, and I don’t know how many people feed it.

At this time, he came to rub Zhu Yao's legs, probably because he felt lonely at night and wanted to find someone to play with him.

Really not afraid of people at all.

Zhu Yao bent down and moved his hand down another centimeter, and he could touch the cat's head.

She suddenly withdrew her hand.

Stand up and walk away.

The cat that Qu Qingcheng may have patted on the head was left in place by her with a dazed expression.

******

Zhu Yao put his hands in the pockets of his down jacket and walked slowly along the road.

There was no one on the road, and the only group of young people passing by sang "Happy New Year" under the dim street lights, and smiled drunkenly at Zhu Yao.

Zhu Yao dodged.

Probably people are either at home or in bars for the New Year's Eve, and they haven't left yet, but there are quite a few empty taxis on the road.

But Zhu Yao didn't intend to take a taxi, and walked along the sidewalk along the road.

The laces of the white sneakers were untied and hung limply. Zhu Yao didn't bother to tie them, so he took a step and stepped on them.The toes rubbed against the ground and kicked a small stone, and when kicked, Gululu rolled forward a few times and jumped twice.

Sometimes the strength is not well controlled, and the small stone will roll too far or deviate from the direction. Zhu Yao will hook it back with the tip of his toe.

Just kicked all the way.

Zhou Ang called her: "Where have you been?"

"Go home first."

"Why didn't you say anything..." Zhou Ang stopped talking, and only said: "Then you pay attention to safety."

"Ah."

Zhu Yao hung up her cell phone, and the warm yellow street light shone on her back, like sunlight in a dark night, but it didn't warm the cold feeling all over her body.

so cold.Zhu Yao shrank his shoulders.

Is it very cold today?But she saw a group of young people walking towards them, their faces reddened by alcohol, even their down jackets were open, and they didn't look cold at all.

Zhu Yao avoided the group of young people again and kicked his own pebbles.

How did things get to this point, she wondered?

Maybe it was because of the lipstick that Qu Qingcheng handed her last night, casually revealing that she had a connection with Zhu Yinglan.

Maybe it's because Shang Xiaoran's cheerful smiling face appeared on the balcony of Qu Qingcheng's house, but Zhu Yao was the one who was forgotten.

Maybe it was because of Yang Shenghan who suddenly appeared on New Year's Eve, and the hug she had with Qu Qingcheng in the corner.

Perhaps it was because Qu Qingcheng calmly said that he bought her another lip balm in the face of Zhu Yao who suddenly appeared, so calm that Zhu Yao's inexplicable rage last night seemed irrational and ridiculous.

Perhaps, it's all of these superimposed.

In the end, it was condensed into one sentence - "I hate you".

******

Years later, when they reunited after a long absence, the relationship between Zhu Yao and Qu Qingcheng changed.

It was probably on a spring morning, at the end of spring and near summer, when the legs stretched out from the quilt, they would not feel the coolness anymore.

Qu Qingcheng and Zhu Yao nestled together, applying nail polish to each other's toes.

"Don't move around." Qu Qingcheng stretched out his index finger and tapped Zhu Yao's white instep.

"I know, I know, Teacher Qu." Zhu Yao leaned against the head of the bed, her long hair hanging down, and answered lazily.

She looked at Qu Qingcheng with her head lowered, pinned her drooping hair behind her ears, and concentrated on dealing with her shell-like toenails.

"Do you know?" Zhu Yao talked about the past in the calmest voice he could, pretending to be nonchalant.

Finally she concluded: "So we've been lost for so many years."

Qu Qingcheng smiled, did not speak, and lowered his head to apply nail polish.

"What are you laughing at?" Zhu Yao leaned over, pressing his forehead against Qu Qingcheng's chin: "Aren't you sorry?"

"Don't move around." Qu Qingcheng pushed Zhu Yao: "The nail polish is going to be rubbed off."

Zhu Yao, the international actress who was later said to be too airy, faced her teacher Qu's "rebuke" at this moment, and put her feet outside the quilt obediently, but put her hands on Qu Qingcheng's shoulders.

"Ask you, what are you laughing at?"

"Laugh at you for being stupid." Qu Qingcheng blew on Zhu Yao's toes, as if he thought Zhu Yao was too noisy and wanted the nail polish to dry faster.

"Where are you stupid?"

"It was New Year's Eve that year..." Qu Qingcheng said, "It's not that I didn't call you."

"Where did you call me?"

"I asked Shang Xiaoran to call you."

"..." Zhu Yao was a little speechless: "Why did you think of asking Shang Xiaoran to call me? She didn't tell me at all."

"Because you were very angry with me the night before, I'm afraid I'll call you myself, so you don't want to come." Qu Qingcheng leaned on Zhu Yao's shoulder: "I was already 24 years old at that time, how could I know that you were more than ten years old? These twists and turns between young girls."

"And that hug between me and Yang Shenghan..."

Zhu Yao hugged Qu Qingcheng a little tighter: "Stop talking, I know."

After she knew about Qu Qingcheng's past and what kind of person Qu Qingcheng was, she already understood what happened to that hug at that time.

It was just Qu Qingcheng's exploration of his own sexuality, and a reconciliation and farewell to Yang Shenghan.

"So stupid." Zhu Yao said to herself.

"Yes." Qu Qingcheng said.

The author says:

感谢在2021-10-0314:15:48~2021-10-0412:45:54期间为我投出霸王票或灌溉营养液的小天使哦~

Thanks to the little angel who cast the rocket launcher: 1 Huosen;

Thanks to the little angel who threw the landmine: 22320650, child, Mu Chenyan, 1 year old;

Thank you very much for your support, I will continue to work hard!