When I woke up, I lost my memory

Consciousness sinks, like floating in the deep sea, the warm coolness drags him up, and the fall will never end.

It would be great if he could sleep like this forever, he thought, never wake up again, and forget everything forever.

But this is just a moment.

Que Yun slowly opened his eyes. The surrounding light was dim, and his head suddenly ached, as if it was about to split open.

"woke up?"

A slightly tired voice.

In the blurred vision, a middle-aged woman was sitting by the bed, looking at him nervously.

It was the aunt who had worked in Que's family since Que Yun was young, her surname was Wu.

Que Yun parted his lips slightly, and called out, "Aunt Wu—"

The sound stopped abruptly.

A hoarse voice came out of his mouth, and Que Yun was startled.He seemed to have yelled loudly, his throat was dry, as if a short thorn had been inserted, and there was a dull pain.

My mind is also blank, I can't think of anything.

"What time is it?" Que Yun said softly, "Why didn't you draw the curtains?"

Aunt Wu helped Que Yun to sit up, put the water glass in his hand and stood up: "It's four o'clock in the afternoon."

Then she went to the bed.

The heavy curtains were drawn open, and sunlight streamed in through the floor-to-ceiling windows, illuminating the entire room.

Only then did Que Yun's vision become clear.

Decorated in a classical style, simple and elegant, this is his room.He has lived here for 19 years.

After drawing the curtains, Aunt Wu opened the door, and when Que Yun was drinking water, she said something to the outside.

Immediately, a woman with glasses walked in.

"You're awake." The woman walked to his bed with a gentle voice: "Remember me?"

"... Nangong?" Que Yun looked at his childhood sweetheart: "Are you wearing a wig?"

In my memory, Nangong Nian had shoulder-length short hair and was carefree, but Nangong in front of me had long hair reaching her waist, wearing a smart suit jacket and glasses that didn't match her at all, as if she was playing a game of pretending to be an office worker.

Nangong Niantong exchanged glances with Aunt Wu, and sat down on the chair beside the bed: "This is real hair. Que Yun, I am your attending doctor, Nangong Nian."

Que Yun's brows twitched, and he gave a strange smile: "Are you kidding me?"

"Don't worry, you just received treatment, it's normal that you can't remember it for a while." The childhood sweetheart was as usual, with a flat tone.

However, the application is serious.

The Nangong family has practiced medicine for generations, and Que Yun knew that Nangong Nian would definitely become a doctor at a very young age.

"I remember very clearly that your father forbade you to play rock and roll, and you had a big fight with him..." Que Yun raised his hand to hold his head: "Where do I have amnesia?"

He still remembered that Nangong said that she printed out the report card with all A's and threw it in her father's face.She said that she had never seen her father show such an expression, and Que Yun said that she drew the scene in her head.

The stars were very bright that night, the two of them were sitting in Que Yun's dormitory, and outside the spacious floor-to-ceiling windows were stars covered by city lights.

"There was indeed such a thing." The childhood sweetheart seemed to be recalling: "However, I still need to ask you a few questions, and I will explain to you after confirming how much you remember, is that okay?"

Que Yun nodded slowly.

Maybe it wasn't a game, but he was weak all over, as if he was starving and had no strength to fight Nangong Nian.

Aunt Wu picked up the empty water glass and walked out the door.

"Aunt Wu, I want to eat something." Que Yun called out to her, "Snacks are fine."

Aunt Wu responded, and quickly brought tea, and Que Yun stuffed half a croissant in one gulp.

Nangong Nian put a recording pen on the bedside table and asked the first question: "What is your name?"

"Que Yun."

"gender?"

...Is it necessary to confirm?

Que Yun paused, and said, "Male?"

Nangong Nian smiled, "Age?"

"Nineteen." After he finished speaking, Aunt Wu seemed to sigh softly.

Just as Que Yun was about to look sideways, Nangong Nian asked again: "How are you feeling now?"

"That's it, it's no different from usual." Que Yun swallowed the other half of the croissant: "You know I'm impatient."

It means to ask Nangong Nian to ask any questions quickly.

"Then," Nangong said calmly, "do you remember the last time you felt sad?"

sad?Que Yun shook his head: "I have no impression."

"When was the last time you felt happy?"

Que Yun turned his head to look at the window: "When the light falls in."

"Tell me about your family."

"What's the problem?" Que Yun frowned and looked towards the window.

There is a garden under the window, and there is a swing in the garden, which was set up by his father himself when he was three years old.Whenever his mother was walking on the lawn or drinking afternoon tea, he would swing on the swing and wave to his mother from a distance.

That was a long time ago. He left home to study at the age of 14, and he studied for five years.

On the eve of his undergraduate graduation, he learned that his father's company had gone bankrupt, and after that...

Que Yun frowned.

Mom and Dad are coming to his graduation, but there is a car accident on the way to the airport.

On the day he returned here, there was heavy rain in the sky, and he remembered standing in front of the grave, crying hoarsely in the rain.

His whole body was icy cold, bitingly cold.

But he knew clearly that this was not a dream, but reality.

Que Yun clenched his hands tightly, feeling tight in his chest: "Did I pass out at the funeral?"

Nangong Nian probably understood what he still remembered.

"My question is over." Nangong Nian said, "Que Yun, you have undergone MECT, electroshock therapy. Amnesia is one of the side effects of the treatment."

Que Yun: "..."

electrotherapy?If he remembers correctly, electrotherapy is only needed for mental illnesses.

"You have had five electrotherapy sessions, and today is the last one. How do you feel now, do you have any thoughts of hurting yourself?"

five times?hurt oneself?

Que Yun shook his head in disbelief.

"You have suffered from severe depression." Nangong continued, "You even forgot about it this time, but maybe it's a good thing."

Que Yun was stunned for a moment, then subconsciously raised his hand.

He rolled up the sleeves on both sides, and the wrists of his left and right hands were carved with light scars, which did not disappear.

Light and shadow and pain flashed through my mind.

He seemed to have some impressions, just as Nangong Nian said, he did something that hurt himself, but——

"My hands are for playing the violin. No matter how sad I am, I won't be able to move my hands!" Que Yun unconsciously raised his voice.

"Ayun, you haven't played the piano for a long time." Aunt Wu pursed her lips and said, "You said you never want to play the piano again..."

Que Yun looked at Aunt Wu and was stunned.

He gave up on himself so much that he never wanted to touch the piano again? !

"How long have I forgotten?" He looked at Nangong Nian: "How long have I been depressed, how long has it been since my parents' funeral?"

Nan Gongnian: "It's been a year since you were diagnosed with depression, and nearly two years have passed since the funeral."

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