Beauty has a lot of bad thoughts

The more Chris Maeda talked, the sadder he became, and the more he cried, the sadder he became.He covered the frozen goldfish bowl with both hands, and the temperature of his palms melted the ice inside.Water drops trickled down his fingers and fell to the ground with his tears.

"It's not your fault, Chris." Xue Dingbang was afraid of freezing Maeda's hands, so he took the goldfish bowl and put it aside. "You are a good boy, very good and obedient. If you want to know who your father is, I can help you."

Chris Maeda suddenly opened his eyes wide and looked at Xue Dingbang expectantly: "Really? Dingbangsang knows who my father is?"

"Well, I probably know something." Xue Dingbang gently wiped the tears from Chris Maeda's face, kissed his forehead lightly, and held him tightly in his arms. "But I can't be sure, and I don't know where he is now. If Chris wants to know your life experience, I can accompany you to find your relatives. You will not be a child without a home and relatives. If you want , I can also be your relative."

"Don't be relatives, don't be relatives!" Maeda Chris jumped up and stepped on Xue Dingbang's insteps with bare feet, "I don't want to be Dingbangsang's relatives! I want to be your boyfriend, your kitten , your lover! If you were your relative, you wouldn’t hug me anymore. I want Dingbangsang to hug me...gentle, cruel, rough...to satisfy your fantasies, even if you abuse me, it doesn’t matter of!"

"I didn't mean that." Xue Dingbang smiled slightly, grabbed his armpit and lifted him to the ground, "I had some evil thoughts, but I never thought of hurting you from the beginning. Okay, let's not talk about it." Here, you go and put on your shoes, I'll be right over."

Maeda Chris bit the inside of his lip secretly, nodded and left obediently.

Xue Dingbang glanced at Yusuke who was placed on the table, it was completely frozen, like a work of art.

Art at the cost of life.

"I'm sorry, Yusuke." Xue Dingbang wiped off the water droplets on the outer wall of the bathtub, and put Yusuke in a relatively warm place, "If we meet again in the next life, I will take good care of you. Take care of you for the rest of your life."

"Dingbangsang, Dingbangsang!" Maeda Chris stepped on his slippers, and the sound of pattering footsteps gradually approached, "Look—these goldfish in the freezing water are still alive and well! They Swimming! The frog is frozen into ice, as long as it melts, it will come back to life! Shall we thaw Yusuke? Maybe it just fell asleep?! Dingbangsang, Yusuke will come back to life, right?"

Xue Dingbang didn't think that Yusuke had any hope of surviving, but if Maeda Chris was not allowed to try, maybe he would not be at ease for a long time.

"Okay." Xue Dingbang replied with a smile, and together with Chris Maeda put Yusuke in the room temperature water.

The water was seven degrees Celsius and it took some time to melt the ice.Chris Maeda was not in the mood to enjoy the snow anymore, nor did he want to lie down.So he chose to do some lighter housework, came over from time to time to see how Yusuke was thawing, and then ran to report to Xue Dingbang who was chopping firewood.

By afternoon, the water had completely thawed.In the clear liquid water, Yusuke slowly turned his belly.

Chris Maeda was so anxious that he poked Yusuke's head with his finger: "Yusuke, wake up! Little slob, don't sleep, okay? Wake up..."

Yusuke still turned its belly and did not move, Maeda Chris pushed his finger behind its small tail, and while pushing, he kept yelling: "Swim, swim! Yusuke, hurry up and swim!"

Yusuke's small body was pushed forward by Chris Maeda and slid forward for a while.It looks like it is really swimming.Chris Maeda was overjoyed, thinking that Yusuke had really come back to life, but as soon as he stopped, Yusuke rolled over again.

"Hungry, you're hungry, right?" Maeda Chris patted his head, took some food and sprinkled it down, "Yusuke, your favorite food. It's super delicious, don't lose your temper, hurry up Let's eat. Get up!"

Yusuke did not eat fish food.

Maeda Chris directly picked up one and stuffed it into Yusuke's small mouth: "Eat it! Dad bought it for you, eat it quickly, it's delicious!"

The fish food was only stuck in Yusuke's mouth, and he could never swallow it.

"Yusuke, don't be angry! I'll give you a lot of delicious food!" Maeda Chris cried and scooped up the fish feed one after another, but Yusuke still turned his stomach and didn't even move.Maeda Chris, who was sure that Yusuke really couldn't be saved, wiped away the tears on his face, and poured half a can of food into it, "Yusuke, I'll give you whatever you like! Wake up..."

Crucian carp living in nature can of course survive the winter in this way.But Yusuke, the pet goldfish, was too weak to survive.Xue Dingbang was full of guilt, and touched Chris Maeda's hair to show comfort.

Maeda Chris threw himself into Xue Dingbang's arms, and rubbed his crying face on Xue Dingbang's clothes for a while: "You are lying! Yusuke, how could Yusuke die? The fish in the river were frozen, and they didn't care. They will die! The next spring, when the snow melts, they will be alive and kicking."

"I'm sorry, Chris. Don't be sad. This is my mistake. You shouldn't feel sorry for other people's mistakes." Xue Dingbang hugged Chris Maeda with such strength that he seemed to be rubbing him into his arms, " Let's bury Yusuke together. Just bury it under the persimmon tree, together with its favorite feed."

"It's gone...it's all gone..." Maeda Chris just cried, crying so hard.He hugged Xue Dingbang's body, like a drowning person hugging a piece of driftwood, holding on tightly and refusing to let go.

Xue Dingbang comforted him, patted Chris Maeda on the back, and shared the pain of losing Yusuke with him.

This is just a vent. To Chris Maeda, there are indeed many cold facts in this world.He was treated unfairly when he was born.Life stripped him of the few things he had, piece by piece.Only in front of Xue Dingbang will his instinctive spikes that are almost defensive be restrained.

The current Maeda Chris is just a soft little thing.He lives in this world, the only person he can cuddle up to, the only person he can rely on.

Chris Maeda cried for a long time, and a large area of ​​Xue Dingbang's chest was wet.He was so sad, so sad, even when he heard the news of his grandfather's death and returned to the country for the funeral, he was not so sad.At most, he would hide under the blanket and cry, and he would not cry like this because of death.

"Put...that...unopened..." Maeda Chris was sobbing and speaking intermittently, but when he looked up at Xue Dingbang, he had stopped crying, with a strong and calm expression, "Other foods that Yusuke likes, bury them together go in."

Over the past year, Maeda Chris has suffered a lot of grievances.Whether it's at Grandpa's place or in the United States.He had no one to confide in, and he had no way to confide in it.He buried everything in his heart, even to Xue Dingbang, he would not complain.Even though his only relative, grandpa, died, Chris Maeda still pretended to be strong.As if he could live without anyone.

Yusuke's death was an outlet for Chris Maeda's emotions, allowing Chris Maeda to vent all the pain of loss.

Xue Dingbang didn't stop him from crying, and he didn't stop him from spilling a lot of fodder on Yusuke.

All food belongs to the goldfish.

"Yusuke will be very happy." Xue Dingbang closed the soil, picked up two branches, tied them with thread to form a small cross, and stuck it on Yusuke's grave. "With so much to eat, Yusuke won't go hungry in heaven. He can have enough to eat and swim happily in the Milky Way."

"Thank you, Yusuke." Chris Maeda clasped his hands together and prayed sincerely, "Accompany me on the coldest and loneliest day. You must become a Buddha well, and don't come back to trouble Dingbangsang! He didn't mean it! If you are looking for it, come to me, everything is caused by my willfulness! Please remember, Yusuke."

Xue Dingbang softened his eyebrows and hugged Chris Maeda.

"Yusuke won't come back for revenge." Xue Dingbang, who is a materialist, said, "When he was with you, Yusuke was also very happy. Let's raise goldfish in the future." Xue Dingbang looked up at the lead cloud in the sky, Maybe it will snow and cool down tomorrow in the future, "when the weather gets warmer."

"No, I won't raise goldfish anymore." Chris Maeda stood up with his hands on his knees, and smiled sweetly at Xue Dingbang. "But we can have a new Yusuke, Yusuke II!"

Chris Maeda didn't go to work for a few days. He was worried that he would lose his job because of this, and he was anxious to continue his performance work in the bar.Xue Dingbang couldn't help him, so he could only agree.

It snowed heavily for several days, and the car was completely buried in the snow.It took Xue Dingbang and Maeda Chris a lot of effort to pull out the car that had been wrapped into a big fortune.Neither of them had time to eat dinner, so they drove directly to the town, Chris Maeda went to work, and Xue Dingbang drove to refuel.

Chris Maeda gave Xue Dingbang all the money in his pocket, and said: "Dingbangsang can go buy what you like, and when I earn a tip today, I will use all my money for you."

Xue Dingbang rubbed the corners of Chris Maeda's eyes that were swollen from crying, and showed him a tender smile: "Okay."

"It's okay to buy something to 'torture' me." Maeda Chris blinked mischievously, with the tip of his tongue looming across his white teeth, "When there is an intermission, shall we have dinner together?"

Xue Dingbang smiled helplessly, and it was indeed a little bad to say something hidden deep in his heart: "I don't need it now, I'll go cheer up first. Can I come to the bar to find you later?"

Maeda Chris curled his lips indifferently: "I will look forward to everything that Dingbangsang buys me. As long as you want me, everything in Dingbangsang is the best. I will accept everything from you, everything. "

"Then you can continue to look forward to it." Xue Dingbang pinched his cheek, "Not today."

After refueling and then parked the car, it was almost dark.Xue Dingbang smoked a cigarette in the car, adjusted his emotions, and walked into the place where Maeda Chris worked.

There, Xue Dingbang saw the familiar and unfamiliar Maeda Chris.