perfect out of control

Jie Pingan loves to shoot subjects that challenge the audience’s acceptance. He likes to explore the not-so-glamorous corners of the metropolis. That dilapidated tube building.There are also some film lovers and film critics who say that as a director, he is extremely lacking in aesthetics, saying that he is keen on the mouse perspective and the underworld filter.

As soon as the news that Tan Zhen was going to shoot "Stable Structure" came out, everyone was delighted to see what Jie Ping An could do to Tan Zhen. The stubble must be kept, Lou Ying heard from Sheng Ye that Jie Pingan even thought Tan Zhen's hair was too clean on the set, so he wiped a handful of ashes on the ground and rubbed it directly on Tan Zhen's hair.Tan Zhen's assistant said that the stubble on Tan Zhen's chin had already affected his appearance, and asked to trim it, but was scolded by Jie Pingan and ran away.He just wanted to take pictures of Tan Zhen facing the sun, with sweat around his collar and oily hair. Tan Zhen wanted to wash his hands, but he stopped him from washing, and he wanted to re-tie his hair, but he stopped him from doing it.

Later, even Sheng Ye couldn't stand it, and complained to her in the video: "No wonder he wants to invite Tan Zhenge for this film, except for Tan Zhenge, a star with such a good temper who can explode, who can stand him!"

If it weren't for Tan Zhen's really handsome appearance, using the mouse perspective and the underworld filter would not be able to destroy his appearance. It is estimated that this film will be sprayed by Tan Zhen's fans as soon as it is released.

But if it weren't for Jie Pingan's strict requirements, there would be no such real Yan Fei.

Lou Ying remembers a scene where Yan Fei washes his hands. The action of washing his hands has completely disappeared from the shadow of Tan Zhen that day. There is no movement of washing his wrists. Traces of the watch.He washed quickly and vigorously, and the water splashed his chest, but he didn't realize it.

Lou Ying had only seen one movie about Jie Pingan before, and she went to see it with the sick Sheng Yanfeng. It was the "Record of the Survival of an Underground Band". One thing, it’s not like something out of nothing, most of the shooting of the film was at night, and it was about an underground band, so it really worked hard to capture the “underground” look.

But "Stable Structure" is slightly different. When the camera is full of Kong Xinghe, it is not as youthful and bright as it was shot by Jie Ping'an.Kong Xinghe is a top student, but he is very popular, he will help others cheat, and earn a little money by doing this. During the winter and summer vacations, he will give supplementary lessons to the children in the neighborhood, and he can also earn some money. Generally, he will try not to find Yan Fei for small expenses. .Kong Xinghe rides that bicycle to and from school every day, and his favorite songs are always playing in his earphones. Those songs are sandwiched in the noisy background of the city, like an invisible stream, washing away people's vision and hearing.

Lou Ying remembers the long shot of Kong Xinghe riding his bicycle for the last time, the back of the boy riding his bicycle is going away along the street under the morning glow, and the singing is still singing to the accompaniment of the banjo:

So Isneakouttothegardentoseeyou

So, I secretly went to the park to meet you

We keep quiet cause we're dead if they knew

We keep a low profile because if they find out we're dead

So close your eyes

so please close your eyes

Escape this town for a little while*

Escape from this city even if only for a short while*

……

Then there was a sudden "bang", and the singing stopped abruptly.The boy in the white shirt and the bicycle fell where they could not see, the singing was gone, and only the dead morning glow remained in the picture.

Obviously the screen image was still, but at that moment Lou Ying felt that the sky seemed to shake and the angle was reversed.

***

After Kong Xinghe's illness was diagnosed, Yan Fei quit his job in the restaurant and started to deliver food.There is a clip where Tan Zhen delivers food in a storm, but the car skids in the rain and overturns on the side of the road. The car was almost submerged in the water when it got off. Everyone in the auditorium should be as heartbroken as her. , because in the next second, I saw a large stream of red seeping from under Tan Zhen's calf trousers, and mixed into the rainwater all over the ground.Tan Zhen got up, only looked down at his injured calf and didn't care about it. He picked up the car and checked the takeaway in the back of the car. The takeaway was miraculously good, except for some oil leaking from the top box.

After the order was delivered, the customer opened it and found that there was oil leaking in the pocket and oil on the lid, so he questioned him. Tan Zhen panted and explained that the car bumped on the road, but the food was not affected, but the customer did not buy it: "Then How do I know you didn't knock it over and replay it for me? How can you make me eat like this?!"

Tan Zhen looked at the box of barbecue for a while and said, "Why don't I return this order to you."

The customer thought about it, raised his eyebrows and said, "That's fine."

When Tan Zhen took out his mobile phone, the customer turned around and brought the barbecue into the house. Tan Zhen glanced at him and said, "I want to take the barbecue away."

The customer immediately became angry: "Why did you take it away?! You sent it like this yourself, and I didn't complain to you!"

"Didn't you say that you can't eat it like this?" Tan Zhen replied calmly.

"Yes... yes!" The customer was furious, "I can't eat it, can I give it to others?!"

Tan Zhen put away his phone expressionlessly: "If you give it to others, then I won't refund the order."

The customer started yelling, took out the box of barbecue, and threw it directly at Tan Zhen: "Take it, poor man! I don't want that money anymore, I'll give it to you as a coffin book!"

He scolded so loudly that the door of the next room was opened, and a father and son poked their heads out. The adults asked impatiently what they were arguing about so late, but the boy saw Tan Zhen's leg and exclaimed: "Oh, he is bleeding !"

Only then did everyone notice the blood on the ground.

In an instant, Lou Ying seemed to understand why Jie Pingan was so obsessed with letting Tan Zhen play Yan Fei.Because only Tan Zhen plays this role, there will be such a huge and heart-wrenching contrast, which will make every audience in front of the screen sigh with emotion, why two people who are exactly the same, one is a big star in reality, and the other is lingering.

Yan Fei met the heroine Xie Li in the emergency department of the hospital that day. Xie Li was an intern nurse who shed tears while bandaging his wound. She said it was not because of Yan Fei, but because Yan Fei reminded her of Own.She said she didn't know when such a day would end.

When Yan Fei was about to leave, Xie Li told him that he still needed medicine for the wound, Yan Fei only nodded, Xie Li seemed to guess his thoughts, chased him out, called him, and said to him: "You must come back for medicine , your wound is a bit deep and needs to be treated," she said in a low voice, "come to me directly when you come, and I will help you treat the wound and bandage it without charging you."

Yan Fei's complexion was a little bad at the time, the girl's words hit his sore spot, and he said: "No need."

***

Kong Xinghe saw Yan Fei's situation, he told Yan Fei that he didn't want to go to school, but Yan Fei didn't agree.Kong Xinghe, who didn’t even shed a tear when he heard the bad news in the hospital, completely collapsed that night. He shouted: “What’s the point of me going to school now! Maybe sometime I won’t be able to move my hands.” , I can’t even walk my legs!”

Yan Fei held his shoulder and said: "Nothing is meaningful, Kong Xinghe, but your life can't stop here. The doctor said that if you are lucky, you can live for five years, six years, seven or eight years." It’s not impossible,” he said, “I’ll leave you alone at home right now, and you’ll start thinking about it, and it’ll make no sense. What’s the point of going to school, I don’t know, but you can Walk, still run, still have time, what they are all going through, do you want to let it stop here? Do you want to give up the college entrance examination, give up saving money with me to buy a new house?"

Kong Xinghe, who was sitting by the bed, buried his head and choked with sobs, his back curled up like a shrunken and crumpled dress: "I don't even dare to think about these..."

"You can," Yan Fei said in a deep voice, "this disease does not deprive you of the right to dream."

Kong Xinghe shook his head, weeping uncontrollably: "But I can't achieve any of them..."

"It's not impossible, it's just a bit difficult," Yan Fei said, "but dreams are like this." He knelt down and looked up at the crying boy, "Just like me, when I was young, I also dreamed that one day my mother would come Find me, take me away, I thought about becoming rich, I thought about having a happy family, I thought about these things, I don’t care if it can be realized, I also want to think about it, is your dream better than mine? Is it more difficult to achieve?"

Kong Xinghe raised his head, with tears streaming down his face, he looked at the brother born to the same mother, this might be the best gift his mother inadvertently left him in this world.

"I'm so scared," he said, his lips trembling, "I'm so scared, bro..."

Yan Fei leaned over, leaned his forehead on Kong Xinghe's forehead, and said in a low voice: "Don't be afraid, brother is here."

"I'm afraid I'll drag you down, I'm afraid you'll dislike me..."

"No, no Kong Xinghe, you trust me."

They leaned together, skin to skin, breathing entangled, something was about to come out in the camera, but everyone was immersed in sadness, and everyone chose to turn a blind eye.

Residents of Tongzilou waited several more seasons, but the house was still not ready for demolition. Kong Xinghe’s condition worsened after nearly two years of persistence. His legs could no longer walk and he had to rely on a wheelchair.

Yan Fei would sometimes help him when getting in and out of the wheelchair. Lou Ying saw those scenes of Sheng Ye being hugged by Tan Zhen, in the early morning, at night, in heavy snow, in hot summer, separated by each other's warm clothes, or hot skin against each other.At first they would talk, joke, and joke, and then both of them stopped talking. Such scenes are always silent and slow, but persistent and repeated.

In fact, something had warned her by this time, but she still convinced herself that this is Kong Xinghe and Yan Fei, this is a movie, and the director wants them to act like this, but she let go of the flash in her mind some idea of.

Xie Li replaced Kong Xinghe before she got sick and became the warm color in this movie.Kong Xinghe can no longer ride a bicycle, his world is still, he observes his brother in this still world, and also observes the girl who walked into Yan Fei's life.His utterances dwindled, but his unspoken words rose like a sea.Every inner monologue is a blessing to my brother and Xie Li, but every sentence is sad.

One morning Kong Xinghe woke up alone, Yan Fei and Xie Li went to the outskirts of the city to buy goods, and he was the only one in the room.The movie was shot very vaguely, and some shots were vaguely cut out, but everyone in the theater could tell that Kong Xinghe had morning boobs, and he was sitting on the bed, unable to go anywhere, most of his legs were numb, and there was There is a reaction.In the camera, he sat alone on the bed for a long time, bowing his head and weeping. It was obviously such an unsuitable scene, but because it might be the last time in his life, the auditorium was filled with low-pitched crying.

Lou Ying also cried, she also cried when watching Sheng Ye's drama, but Tan Zhen was right, the camera language of the movie gave her a completely different experience, she was very sad, sad for Kong Xinghe, sad for Yan Fei , I feel sad for Sheng Ye, and also for Tan Zhen. No wonder it's hard for Sheng Ye to come out. Even she can hardly tell the difference between reality and fantasy.