docile pet

"why?"

Fang Pei's voice is very deep, and usually he is very angry when he speaks in this tone.

"What why?" Fang Mian closed the door and bent over to change his shoes, and asked nonchalantly, "Will you take a shower first or should I wash first?"

"Why do you say that I don't have a partner? Why do you agree to help her? Why don't you answer my question?"

Every time Fang Pei asked a question, he took a step closer to Fang Mian. Three questions and three steps were enough for him to block Fang Mian in the narrow entrance.

Fang Mian clenched his fists, his nails dug into his palms, only the tingling pain could keep him calm.

"Ah, you said Ding Qiaoqiao, did you hear it just now?" Fang Mian forced himself to show an indifferent smile, "I lied to her, if she doesn't agree, she will definitely make a fuss for a long time. Why stand in here, Don’t you still want to watch a movie later? Go find the resources first.”

"Isn't it easier to tell her that I have a partner? She will never look for you again." Fang Pei's tall figure completely enveloped Fang Mian, blocking all his escape routes.

Fang forced a smile: "I said it casually, I didn't think that much."

The hair on Fang Pei's forehead grew a little longer, hanging down in curls, covering his eyes messily. He stood there, silent for a few seconds before asking: "Fang Mian, do you think I'm stupid? What did you say?" I will believe it?"

Fang Mian choked, lowered his head and retorted palely: "No."

"Fang Mian, what am I to you? Am I just a pet that can be replaced at any time?"

"..."

Tears rolled in the eyes, but Fang Peiqiang held them back and didn't let them flow out: "Why don't you talk? Are you even willing to lie to me now? I don't understand, Fang Mian, I don't understand, don't you like me? ?Aren't we lovers? Why don't you talk?"

Fang Mian bit the corner of his mouth tightly, he heard himself say in a cold voice: "What's the point of asking these..."

"what?"

Fang Mian raised his head abruptly, and repeated loudly: "What's the point of asking these, can you live with me for the rest of your life?"

"Why not?! How long can an ordinary dog ​​accompany you? Can it be 20 years? I can accompany you for 80 years and 100 years and die with you! I have said it many times, why don't you believe me?" Fang Pei couldn't bear it anymore, tears fell in strings like raindrops, he wiped it over and over with the back of his hand, but couldn't finish it no matter what.

Fang Mian laughed with the corners of his mouth pulled, but his eyes were so sad that he seemed to be crying: "Fang Pei, you are not even human, why do you make promises? Why should I trust you?"

Fang Pei froze in place.

"Don't ask, Fang Pei, isn't it good for us to live like this now? I don't know you monsters very well, and it seems that you don't know much about yourself. But I know one thing very well. It is definitely not good for you to follow me. You I don’t think about it now, but I will slowly figure it out in the future. So we don’t have any burdens, if one day you want to leave, just tell me, I will never pester you.”

Yes, Fang Pei is sticky and coquettish in Fang Mian's ear almost every day, saying that he likes Fang Mian and that he will be with Fang Mian forever, but what kind of "like" does he like?How many days can the "forever" in his mouth last?

Fang Mian didn't think about anything, when Fang Pei hugged him and kissed him affectionately, he would often have some unrealistic visions suddenly.

Since Fang Pei can live with him for one month, one year, and ten years, isn't life just a copy of countless yesterdays?That life seemed to pass quickly.

But such longings are nothing but soap bubbles blown by children. The sun makes them colorful, but it only takes two or three seconds to shatter.

Fang Mian has heard too many promises and had various expectations, but reality is reality and will not change because of Fang Mian's expectations.

His junior high school grades are very good, and he ranks third in the city in the senior high school entrance examination. He dreams of going to the city's No. [-] Middle School to study, but what happened?

In his third year of junior high school, he had the opportunity to get a place to go abroad as an exchange student. He dreamed of going to a foreign art academy for further study. What happened?

He met his first love in high school and walked with him through the abyss of pain. He fantasized about spending the rest of his life with his first love, but what happened?

He loves art. He started drawing from the moment he picked up a pen when he was a child. He fantasized about becoming a cartoonist. What happened?

So why expect anything?Why fantasize?The future is so long, there are countless forks in the road that are visible to the naked eye at the foot, at the moment, and in the present. Who will guarantee that tomorrow will not be the last day?Who can guarantee that Fang Pei will stay with him for the rest of his life?

Moreover, Fang Mian is very self-aware.

He has an ordinary appearance, a dull and cowardly personality, no money, no talent, Fang Pei will only fall in love with him because of the fledgling plot, because Fang Mian is the first human being he has come into contact with deeply, and he has not had the opportunity to see the whole world yet. When he meets more people and encounters more things, he will find that he still has many choices, and Fang Mian is only the worst and worst of those choices.

So Fang Mian chose not to ask, he didn't want to.

Only the food you eat is your own, only every second you have spent is real, and only the happiness in front of you is happiness.

Is it not good to live a day like this?

"not good!"

Fang Pei's voice became hoarse.

"Fang Mian, I can't tell! I don't want to be a pet that can be replaced. I want to be your lover, your husband, and your wife. Any unique identity must belong to me! I won't leave, I'm not going anywhere! Don't try to drive me away!"

Fang Mian stared at Fang Pei's teary eyes, wanted to raise his hand several times to wipe them clean, but held back.

"I won't drive away your Fang Pei, but today I want to make it clear, and I want to apologize to you. It's because I didn't teach you well that I made you feel wrong."

"Your concept of the word 'like' was wrong from the very beginning. I said it to you when I first heard it, right? 'Pei Pei is so cute, I like you, how can I like you so much?' Yes Right? I might say this word twenty or thirty times a day, so you remember it, so the first word you said to me was 'like' when you obviously didn't understand human language. But Fang Pei, I was right at that time Your love is for an ordinary puppy, I will hug you, kiss you and sleep with you, but that's all, I don't want to fall in love with you, who would fall in love with a pet?"

Fang Pei was stunned, he opened his big eyes, innocent, naive, sad and painful.

Fang Mian felt that he might really be crazy, his soul seemed to be split into two halves, one half was hysterical with anger, and the other half was begging sadly to stop.

Why is he arguing with Fang Pei about this?If Fang Pei understood what he said, would he leave soon?

He should stop and give Fang Pei whatever he wants, so that Fang Pei will continue to stay by his side, continue to like him, continue to cling to him, and they can still live carefree as before.

But why can't he stop?

"Now do you understand Fang Pei? The 'like' you learned from me was not a 'like' between lovers in the first place, but because we live together, only with each other, you will feel that we are inseparable , Actually not. Fang Pei, now you change back into a puppy, walk out of this house, bark twice cutely at the gate of the community, and you will immediately get countless likes..."

Fang Mian didn't know what his expression was like now, but he guessed it must be hideous, because Fang Pei was crying.

Fang Pei had never cried so sadly before.

He stood in front of Fang Mian with his head bowed deeply, his shoulders shrunk, his body trembling, and an uncontrollable whimper leaked from his lips, like an abandoned stray dog.

But Fang Mian didn't stop.

"Can you tell Fang Pei apart? Is your liking love, or novelty, lust, or possessiveness?"

The last fluffy seed of a dandelion is crumbling.

As if his soul had left his body, Fang Mian's consciousness floated above his head, and he heard himself say coldly:

"So you don't really love me, and we're not lovers."