eat, dance, love

After Pei Yanya gave birth to Zheng Xing and Zheng Hao, and before she passed away, there was a time when she seemed to be in a good mood.

Relying on her experience in raising me, she summed up and optimized with great interest, and formulated a growth education plan for the two children.However, before the plan could be seriously implemented, she collapsed.

One day, the two children cried at the same time. She coaxed them patiently at first, but soon followed suit.I was at the side, helpless and embarrassed, and asked her dryly why she was crying too.She raised her hand to wipe her tears, but the tears were like beads with a broken thread, falling down endlessly.

In the end, between the child and her, I don't remember who stopped first.I just remember that the weather outside was clear and sunny, and she said to me: "Xu'er, the weather may change tomorrow."

I didn't look like it no matter what, and I didn't want to refute her who cried bitterly just now, so I could only ask, "Why?"

"I feel like ... I've felt that way a few times these days," she said.

It sounds like an absurd basis, and even in that situation, I couldn't sincerely convince her.So, I didn't take this matter to heart at all, and it didn't rain the next day.

However, the third day came.

She saw it and was very happy. She even pulled me over and said, "Look, the things I have felt over and over again are indeed true."

After that day, the days when she seemed to be in a good mood were over.Until she passed away, she was in a kind of stagnant silence. For a long time, she didn't speak, and she didn't care about anything.

So every time I think about her life, that conversation about the weather comes to mind.It is becoming more and more inexplicable and inconsistent, and at the same time it is becoming more and more impressive.

As a result, the phrase "Things that have feelings over and over again are really true" has become my Murphy's law, and it has been fulfilled in an extremely mysterious way.

——When I met Guan Yan downstairs at Gu Yu's house, I immediately remembered this past event in my mind.

In fact, on the day Guan Yan appeared, Gu Yu hadn't been home for almost a week.

To be precise, from the second day I came here, he basically stayed in the program group.The recording of the program entered the most intense and intensive stage, so he had to rest in the nearest hotel near the studio.

Our contact is even less than when most of China is separated.Perhaps because the physical distance is closer, there are fewer online chats.He replied a lot lazier and shorter than before, and the most he said was "wait for me to go home".

But he never came home.

Originally, we agreed that I was not in a hurry to work, and would play with me first when he was free, but I couldn't wait.

After staying alone for three or four days, I was so bored that I fixed all his rose vines with a small wire, and then I went to work in a western restaurant recommended by my friend.

For this reason, Boss Gu Yu was not happy, complained for a while, and didn't answer the phone for a day.

I went back to the building in Yimingyuan late at night, looked up at the ninth floor, and saw a little light, so I called him immediately.He answered, his voice was a little tired, and he gave a sleepy "Hello".

"Are you home?" I asked.

He paused, his tone slightly hesitant: "Are you back?"

"Yeah, are you home?"

Before he could answer, I saw Guan Yan waiting in the corridor.

I recognized him very smoothly, only a short recognition process, so short that it can be ignored.

Although the 16 years have left many traces on him, turning him from a handsome young talent into a middle-aged man who looks much more mediocre, there is still something unforgettable between his eyebrows and eyes.

That kind of thing makes recognition extremely easy.

Pei Yanya's words flashed in my mind, and the things I doubted more than once - Gu Yu knew who I was a long time ago, and also flashed a moment of bewilderment and regret for not confessing earlier.

In my vision, no matter what, I should tell him first, goodbye to the person I have to see.

"Brother Xu, you...wait for me, I'll go down immediately." Gu Yu's voice pulled my thoughts back, and I subconsciously discerned his state and mood when he said this, but I couldn't be sure what the truth was.

And Guan Yan was standing in front of me, from the way he looked at me, he didn't recognize me.

Of course.There is a huge difference between the eight-year-old me and the 24-year-old me—but, if Gu Yu had recognized me long ago, why should he?

"Okay." I decided to hand over the scene to Gu Yu.

After hanging up the phone, I didn't move forward, nor did I show any strange emotions towards Guan Yan.We were separated by a distance of two or three meters, and we were all waiting for the same person.

Soon, Gu Yu came down.He was wearing a very loose long sweater, which almost reached his knees, and the hat covered his head, as if his whole body was wrapped in that dress.

His appearance reminds me of those celebrities who were secretly photographed.He really looks like a star, too.

"Xiao Yu!" Seeing him open the door, Guan Yan immediately greeted him with a very earnest attitude.

Gu Yu only nodded slightly, and then looked at me with unclear meaning.I hesitated for a moment whether to go over, he paused in the light of the porch, and then came over on his own initiative, so close that a faint scent of herbal perfume penetrated into my nostrils.

"Brother Xu." He lightly touched me with his elbow, hesitant to speak.

I met his eyes and was instantly sure - he really knew.

I looked at him complicatedly, not knowing what to say.

He also looked at me as if he was waiting for me with an attitude.

We stared at each other, as if we should know each other, but in fact we were all at a loss.

——I have always been concerned about whether he knows who I am, and hesitated when to confess, but he already knows, and now I finally know that he knows, so I hold back my stomach full of "When did I know", "How did I know?" ", "How do you feel when you know it", "What do you think of me"... But there is no way to ask immediately.

And he was different from the one I imagined he should be angry and questioned.Instead, it seemed that I was afraid that I would be angry, and was waiting for me to question something.

Among them, there must be places where our information is not equal.

Although, it is not equal.

After looking at each other like this for a while, I glanced at Guan Yan who was hesitating over there from the corner of my eye.He was treated so indifferently by Gu Yu just now, but he still had an earnest face. Seeing Gu Yu walking towards me, he didn't dare to ask more questions—he was like a second father who couldn't please his children.

"He didn't recognize me." I quickly whispered to Gu Yu.

"Oh." He sighed softly, pursed the corners of his lips, then pulled out his arms from his pockets and took me in his arms. He walked to the corridor, still indifferent, and said slowly to Guan Yan, "My boyfriend, surnamed Zheng .”

Hearing this, Guan Yan was a little surprised, looked me up and down, and said with a smile on his face: "The young man is quite handsome, very handsome."

Probably to please Gu Yu, he looked at me with eyes full of approval, and I vaguely remembered the way he praised me when he was a child.Compared to Pei Yanya's dislike for my dancing talent, he is very tolerant of my playful nature and often plays the role of a loving father.

"You also saw me and my boyfriend, don't you worry?" Gu Yu said.

"Don't worry, I'm much more at ease." Guan Yan nodded, clasped his hands, and rubbed them together, "That's fine, I won't bother you anymore, go back and do business for your mother, she will be happy."

"Don't, she'll go to hell if she's happy, I remember when she was going to smash me to death with a mirror." Gu Yu said coolly, swiped his card, and planned to go in.

Guan Yan was still courteous: "She will figure it out, I'll help you persuade her."

Gu Yu chuckled lightly, didn't say anything, and pulled me in.

If it weren't for his arm holding me, and the slight tremor coming through the clothes, I would have thought that he was really tugging like his tone and expression.Turning a corner and entering the elevator room, he let out a soft breath.

"Brother Xu," he turned his head to look at me with uneasy eyes, "that... you, Dad..."

"When did you know?" I asked him pretending to be calm, breaking through his entanglement of not knowing where to start.

It's not really my state of mind, but I tend to be more faux when it comes to people who are more flustered than I am.If he is calm at this moment, then I will reveal my true colors.

"It's early...probably when you've been staying in other stores all day to avoid me." The elevator came and we entered, he continued, staring up at the floor indicator.

"I got to know your family well. After playing with her for a long time, the more I look at her, the more I feel that she looks familiar. In addition, she said that your mother is a dancer, so I figured it out. I will pick it up when you are not around." After school, she chatted with her dance teacher... For an artist like Teacher Pei, who doesn't have a deep memory of teaching in Haibao? So, if you ask a little bit, you will know everything."

I am speechless.It was a lot earlier than I thought, and I felt like an idiot while being relieved.

"Then why didn't you ask me about it?"

"At that time, I didn't know that you knew that I was your younger brother. How could I know what you thought? If you don't want to confront me about these things at all, I'll ask, isn't it to expose your scars?"

Speaking of his position, he regained his confidence and turned his head to give me a look: "Think about it for yourself, in your peaceful life, a stranger from other places suddenly came to sleep with you, and this person is your younger brother. Panicked?"

...That's right.

I said, "You found out that I was your brother, and you still continue to flirt with me?"

He replied: "Don't you know that I am your younger brother and come back with me?"

I am speechless.At this time, the elevator reached the ninth floor. He walked out quickly, then opened the door, and dragged me in with his backhand.

We were face to face, he looked at me, his eyes were different from the usual smiling look, and also different from the seasoned look when he teased me.There was only seriousness in his eyes.

"Because I like you." He took off his hat, spoke slowly and with a strong aura, and said word by word, "I don't care who you are, even if you are my own brother, if I like you, I will never let you go .”

I have to admit, his words made my blood boil.I suddenly understood what he said, as long as I have any other purpose, he will hate me.

——He didn't think too well of my intentions, but he hoped that I had no other intentions.

"I came back with you not only because I like you too." I hugged him, the sweater on his body was too loose, which made his whole body softer, "I love you, and I have loved you for a long, long time."