mistakenly compared you to a star

Facing Yan Ke who was extremely astonished, Chu Chen said slowly: "You probably don't know, I was suffering from dissociative disorder when I was about four or five years old. Since then, Zichen has been with me. I’m sorry, I didn’t have the courage to tell you about Zichen’s existence, because I didn’t know what happened to me then.”

Chu Chen looked into the distance, his eyes were filled with tenderness unknowingly: "He is so sunny and simple, unlike me, he is such a cute kid. Whenever I can't help because of illness and pessimism, When dealing with real-life situations, he was the one who came out to block for me and healed a lot of damage for me."

"In the dead of night, he also accompanied me, encouraged me, and made fun of me. It can be said that since I fell ill, he has been my only sunshine and my dearest person."

"I don't understand what you're talking about..." Yan Ke's breathing became disordered, "You treat Zichen...? Are you taking revenge on me because I chose Zichen? But my feelings for you at that time were not false... ...Ah Chen, what is our past?"

"It seems that you didn't notice it at all." Chu Chen shook his head indifferently, with a sarcastic smile on his face, "If it wasn't for Zichen, our fates wouldn't be entangled."

"Wait! What are you talking about? Because of Zichen?"

Yan Ke suddenly opened his eyes wide as if he had just woken up from a dream. He seemed to feel something faintly, and his heart was stubbornly hovering in a daze, as if he would be swallowed by the light if he took another step forward.

"Yes." Chu Chen said, "Maybe because Zichen is a sub-personality, his own memory is not coherent enough, and he can't remember many long-term things clearly. After returning to the inner world, nourished by the peaceful atmosphere there, he became more and more More memories started to come up, and he told me everything he remembered."

"He told me that the first time he met you at the small store he opened at home, he was attracted by your vigor that wanted to split the night, so he didn't hesitate to give you his favorite new umbrella."

"He told me that when he pulled you up from the stinky ditch that night when he was being bullied by seniors, he saw how clear your eyes were, and suddenly had the urge to drag you out into the sun."

"He also told me that when you told him how you blamed yourself when you saw your dog being beaten, he was deeply touched by your rare opening of your heart. Since then, he forgave your shadyness and accepted your paranoia, because He believes that your heart is as soft as anyone else's."

"His words made me understand that in the story of the three of us, I was the one who accompanied the runner, and it was the souls of the two of you that really attracted each other." Chu Chen smiled bitterly.

"But do you know, when Zichen recalled these things, he still couldn't believe that this was the past between him and you, and he came to carefully test me, for fear that he would occupy the magpie's nest."

"So Yan Ke, now you understand that when you went to Washi, the reason why Zichen had impressions of the past was because those were his memories. And did you misunderstand something? Think he is gradually Instead of me, and then insulting him?"

"Don't say any more... Ah Chen, please don't say any more..." Every time Chu Chen asked, Yan Ke would collapse and take a step back, wishing to run away, but his body refused to obey.

"I don't believe it... Ah Chen, did you say that on purpose to make me regret it?" He had a severe headache and could only refute mechanically, even though he knew the truth very well in his heart.

Chu Chen looked down at him, with a little sadness and pity: "If you don't believe me, then you might as well recall what pattern was on the umbrella he gave you on the rainy day you met?"

Yan Ke was stunned, and the pictures of the past emerged little by little in front of his eyes - the pattern on the umbrella was white and soft, which used to be hazy, but now it is getting clearer...

It's the lamb, and that's Zichen's umbrella.

Could it be that Zichen was the first person he met and fell in love with...

Is it wrong to persist for so many years?joke! !His pursuit over the years is like a joke.

I thought I was protecting the white moonlight in my heart, but in fact the person I liked was right in front of me, but I didn't cherish it, and even hurt him time and time again...

What a joke God made with him...

Yan Ke sat paralyzed on the ground, his body trembling uncontrollably, but he wanted to cry but had no tears.He hated himself, hated fate, what a beautiful reunion that should have been, was ruined like this by his own hands.

At this time, Chu Chen's usual cold voice sounded again: "As for between us, you have put a lot of fantasies on me. After that incident, you are driven by guilt, so you are so persistent to me."

So what I want to tell you is that you may still be doing the same thing now, and you want to save Zichen out of guilt and regret, and want to redeem him.If so, please be sober and don't let this absurd drama continue. "

Yan Ke was stunned for a long time. Facing Chu Chen's ruthless questioning, he felt a little uncertain for a while. After all, he really didn't want to hurt anyone anymore.

However, he at least wanted to express that the reason why he kept following in Zichen's footsteps was not just out of guilt and regret...

"Achen, thank you for telling me this. I admit that I am not a person who understands love, but I can learn."

"I thought my dream was always high and far away, but now... Zichen is my dream." Yan Ke's voice was hoarse and emotional, "I won't give up."

The expected answer... Chu Chen closed his eyes and sighed softly.

"Okay, Yan Ke, I see your determination. Although Zichen very much hopes that I will persuade you to leave, I can see that he has not let you go completely in his heart. What I want is his whole heart, but It's not like it is now, it can only be his habitat when he is hurt. So, I won't interfere with the things between you."

"I hope you can be as magnanimous and give Zichen the right to choose, and let him make the choice that makes him the happiest. If your words and deeds put pressure on him afterwards, I, as the body's Master personality, there is a way to prevent you from seeing him at any time, understand?"

Yan Ke was stunned at first, then suddenly understood what Chu Chen meant - as long as he could make Zichen happy, Chu Chen would not object to being together with Zichen.

Yan Ke immediately regained his energy and straightened his body again. After all, it was the first time he had received a certain sense of affirmation for his hard work and persistence for so long. "I really didn't expect that one day we would have this kind of relationship, but Ah Chen, your style still impresses me as always."

Chu Chen was noncommittal, and shook his head with a smile.look to the sky.An unknown white bird flew across the sky there, and Yan Ke followed his line of sight, but saw nothing.

It seemed that all the intersections of the past were taken away lightly by a bird, and there was a colorless and tasteless silence between the two.Finally, it was Chu Chen who spoke:

"There is one last sentence, I always wanted to say it to you personally... At that time, you killed that person instead of me, thank you."

Hearing that secretive matter was suddenly brought up, Yan Ke's expression froze.

Chu Chen continued: "If you hadn't stopped me at that time, Zichen and I wouldn't have the life we ​​have today. At that time, I blamed you for arbitrariness and cruelly abandoned you. I'm sorry. But now I have completely thought about it. gone."

"So, you don't have to feel guilty about me anymore, let alone be bound by the past, just do what you want."

Yan Ke's thoughts suddenly went back to the rainy night when he and Chu Chen broke up many years ago.The steps in front of Chu Chen's house were extraordinarily wet and cold, so cold that it almost penetrated into his bones.

That chill had been accumulating in his heart for many years, and it was only now that he was pulled into the sunlight. Unexpectedly, it disappeared so easily.

He breathed a sigh of relief, his body seemed to be so light that he could float up at any time.He finally understood that what he had been waiting for for so many years was just an understanding.

"...I finally did the right thing for you, didn't I?" Yan Ke asked softly.

"Everyone has their own right and wrong. With me, you are."

"Thank you..." Yan Ke's eyes were red, "Thank you for telling me this."

"You have worked hard all these years." Chu Chen raised his head and looked at him with a calm smile in his eyes, "Let's hug one last time as a farewell, Yan Ke. It would be best if we don't need to meet again in the future."

"Well. I won't let you down." Yan Ke stepped forward and hugged Chu Chen vigorously.

"Then, goodbye, Chen."

"Goodbye, Yan Ke."

--------------------

Suspected to hit a ghost tonight, my heart...*%#￥*(&#*

See you tomorrow QAQ