Infatuation is the most boring

I heard the roar of the train passing by, sharp and piercing, followed by a brief blank, I couldn't see, hear, or feel anything, and then I didn't know how long after that, I heard the sound of my own skull breaking.

The life that belonged to Xu Jiayang came to an end.

The wheel of time is still turning, my world is a blank, everything no longer exists, like an illusion, there is nothing, nothing can be grasped.

After an unknown amount of time, I suddenly heard the noise of the crowd.

My body was hanging above the railway tracks, and I saw many people, the crowd watching, interviewing reporters, photographers, and the red-eyed Fatty Wang.

Before I committed suicide, I sent a message to Fatty Wang, just telling him my bank card password. Although there were only a few thousand dollars in it, it was my last wish for this only friend.

I suddenly wanted to walk towards Fatty Wang, only to find myself floating between the sky and the earth. Only then did I realize that I was dead.

That's right, I, Xu Jiayang, are dead.

He died on the railroad track leading to Liucheng.

Grind your own body to pieces, thinking about saving the trouble behind you.

I am alone in this world, and I have a nominal father who wished for me to die. I guess he will be very happy when he hears the news that Xu Jiayang committed suicide by lying on the rails. After all, he has been looking forward to it for so many years.I don't have any friends. The last three years of my life were all given to Zhou Mingkai. I don't have my own social circle. The only friend I have is Fatty Wang. He may feel sorry for me for a while, and then mention a fool named Xu Jiayang in the future. Will sigh for a while, nothing more.

That is what I thought.

I don't know why my soul is still conscious. It turns out that there are such strange things in this world, and those who have died have the right to speak.

I looked at the railroad track, and I couldn't even see the blood stains. Once the high-pressure water gun was flushed, the residue was cleaned up. It was hard to see that a life was buried in this place a few hours ago.

I slowly approached the ground, after all, it was a strange feeling to be floating in the air all the time.

I don't know where I should go, I don't even know how to go to heaven or hell, and I don't know if there is such a thing as reincarnation. I only know that I am a ghost who is a little confused now.

I looked at those reporters, thinking that there would probably be a news about a mentally handicapped young man dying on the railway track tomorrow, and there would probably be many people commenting on the poor psychological endurance of contemporary young people.

I don't know where I should go, I only know Fatty Wang in the crowd.

I couldn't bear to watch him look like he was about to cry or not, but he suddenly ran over and knelt by the railroad tracks, crying and cursing.

"Xu Jiayang, you fucking coward! Is it worth it for Zhou Mingkai?"

"Is my father short of your thousands of dollars?"

"Why don't you die in another way, save some organs to save some people?"

"Why... just..."

"..."

Fatty Wang's words woke me up, yes, since I'm going to die, wouldn't it be good to save some organs to save some people?It's just that at that time, I only thought about dying, but I didn't think about the way to die.

Sure enough, such things as suicide must be considered carefully.

I watched Fatty Wang cry like this, approached him, looked at the top of his head that was not far from bald, and thought, fortunately, Fatty Wang has a very bad memory, given him time, he will forget this coward named Xu Jiayang.

I watched Fatty Wang leave the train station until evening.

I know it's not very authentic to follow my only friend as a ghost, but I really couldn't find a place to go, so I had to follow Fatty Wang back to his house.

As soon as he got home, he took out the wine from the refrigerator, and while drinking, wept and scolded me, no matter how unpleasant it was, he never thought about the fact that the dead are the greatest.

I, who was scolded, didn't say anything, but he cried by himself.

I watched Fatty Wang fall asleep with the wine bottle in his arms. I looked at the wine bottles on the ground in every possible way bored, and wanted to move him to the bed, but when I touched his body, I passed straight through.

Look, I am a person who does not have the self-cultivation of a ghost, and still wants to take care of others. Now I am like this, I can't even touch it.

The world became so clean, and I suddenly thought that I was really dead.

I'm dead, that's how I die.

I was suddenly curious about what kind of expression Zhou Mingkai would show when he heard the news of my death.For him, I can't even guess the general emotional range of whether he will be sad or happy.

Thinking of this, I came out from Fatty Wang's house, and drifted to Zhou Mingkai's house according to my memory.

I know, at present, only Fatty Wang should know the news of my death. I'm going to Zhou Mingkai's side, and wait until Fatty Wang sobers up to tell the world about my death, and then spread it to Zhou Mingkai's ears How would he react.

I saw that the light in Zhou Mingkai's apartment was still on, yes, that workaholic, it's only eleven o'clock now, how could he rest.

I went directly into the house. This is the place where I have lived for a year. I am familiar with every decoration and furniture, and most of them I chose by myself.

But now, it has nothing to do with me.

I saw Zhou Mingkai in the study, looking very seriously at the data on the computer.

Zhou Mingkai wore gold-rimmed glasses and was very elegant. The black shirt fit him very well. I recognized the cufflinks on the table. I bought them.He thought the color was too light at the time, but he still wore it later, and he often wore it. This incident kept me warm for a long time.

I sat directly on his desk and performed a few moves to beat him up.

I used to be very jealous of Zhou Mingkai's computer, he spent more time with the computer than with me, but now I see him still putting energy into the computer, but I laugh.

Zhou Mingkai, before we quarreled, I said, you will spend your life with the computer in the future, I don't want you anymore.

Now, I don't know if he will spend his life with the computer.

But, I really don't want him anymore.

No no.

I can't afford it.

I love him. In this life, I love Zhou Mingkai more than myself.For a selfish man like me, but looking at another person wholeheartedly, sometimes I don't believe it, but it is the truth.If possible, I would give everything in exchange for falling in love with Zhou Mingkai until I grow old.

Now it seems that I am indeed a foolish dream.

Zhou Mingkai finally turned off the computer and went to the bedroom, took a pajamas and went to the bathroom, I just stared at the bathroom door, thinking how great it would be if I could appear in the bathroom mirror like in a horror movie.

scare him to death!

But that mirror never reflected my face again.

The author has something to say:

I saw the claws