Cheng Ergongzi

Before, I didn't know my surname was Cheng.

I have always lived in the country with my grandmother, and my mother only came to visit once a month.

Every time she came, she dropped some money and couldn't wait to leave.

I was the proof that she had made ridiculous mistakes, and then became an obstacle for her to climb high and marry into a wealthy family.

She originally thought that being pregnant with a child would pave the way for her to enter the Cheng family, and fly to the sky from then on, but the reality disappointed her.That man has long been engaged to the eldest lady of a powerful family, and he is in the right family, and there is no place for her at all.

The baby in her womb quickly became embarrassing.

At that time, she was young and beautiful, and she took risks and criticisms to have children out of wedlock, not for nothing in the end.

But in the end nothing came of it.

My mother always tried her best to avoid my existence, so I took my grandmother's surname, and my name was also given by my grandmother.

She never left her contact information, nor did she let her grandmother call her.Every time she appeared, she always wore exquisite makeup and long hair that was permed just right, and came and went in a hurry.

I know that my mother doesn't like me, but I have been looking forward to her coming, and once she comes, I will carefully please her.

There is nothing in the countryside, and the night is pitch black, and you can hear the crowing of frogs in the distant pond.

I stepped on the muddy ground after the rain, tried my best to catch a small frog, covered it under a plastic basin and raised it carefully, and held it in the palm of my hand for her to see on the day she came.

She screamed and waved away, with an angry face, and immediately lost her temper at her grandmother, scolding her for raising a wild child.

I carried the frog back into the pond, my knees and elbows ached from trying to catch it.

Mother came less and less.

Sometimes it doesn't show up for months.

Grandma said she was getting married soon.

The mother finally got her wish, married into a rich family, and lived the life of a wealthy young lady.It took several years, countless twists and turns, and countless humiliations, which now seem insignificant.

She doesn't come back at all.

Perhaps there is a rush to get rid of everything related to the past.

The last time it appeared, she left more money than ever.

In addition to living expenses, it also includes the cost of sealing.

That day, she hugged me and cried, her face was covered in makeup.

Not because of sadness, but after a lot of hardships, the world finally went as she wished.

My grandmother and I stood outside the dilapidated house and watched my mother leave.

Grandma said, "Little Jane, from now on there will only be the two of us."

Life in the country is plain and boring. As a child, there is really no entertainment, and there is a long way to go to school.

But most importantly, no money.

Grandma suffers from chronic diseases and has fixed medical expenses every month.

She's been on medication that looks weird and smells weird.There are not only western medicines, but also strange Chinese medicinal materials, which have been boiled in enamel pots for a long time, giving off a disgusting smell.

I don't like the smell, it gets on my clothes and I get laughed at at school.

Fortunately, the schools in the countryside are not very pleasant to everyone, and I have not been bullied too badly because of this.

I always thought that what my grandma was suffering from was just an ordinary chronic disease. Although it would last her whole life, it would not cause any serious problems.

At that time, I didn't know that diabetes could cause hand and foot ulcers.

The diet at home is always very light, with very little oil and salt, and sugar is even more impossible.In order to match my grandmother's diet, I can eat very little.For a child, this is certainly unbearable.

I protested many times, arguing endlessly with my grandma over eating meat.

And when I get into trouble, I'm always very good at it.

Often toss for hours.

Grandma had no choice but to take the bus for a long time and went to the city to buy a KFC.

For the first time, I knew there was such a delicious thing.

Although by the time she came back, the chicken would have been completely cold.

Grandma re-steamed the chicken nuggets and hamburgers in a pan. The chicken skin on the outside was no longer crispy, and the bread collapsed into a wet ball, but I ate it with relish.

And I will never forget it for a long time afterwards.

I once told Shi Fan that the most delicious food in the world is KFC.

Shi Fan couldn't understand.

Of course he can't.

I remember very clearly the look on his face when he said in disgust why are you eating junk food again.

Grandma's illness is getting worse day by day, and I often need to take care of her.

At the age of eleven or twelve, he already knew how to use a needle to inject insulin.

She showed me her swollen legs, which were a deep pit when pressed down.

I was terrified and tried not to look at her hands and legs.

Home is a scary place, filled with strong drug smells and lingering gloom.

I like school more than home.At least there, I can still live like a normal person.

The junior high school I attended was public, and the tuition and miscellaneous fees added up to only a few hundred yuan.There are also many children around who study hard to find a way out, but I can take home the certificate every year.

Grandma said that Jane is so good at studying, she will definitely be able to go to university in the future.

But I couldn't read it in the end.

With daily medication and strict control of diet, I still watched my grandma deteriorate day by day.

Eventually had to be hospitalized.

Study at school during the day and stay in bed in the hospital at night.I have always lived with my grandmother and no one else.

Money is never enough.

If she has enough money, she can go to a better hospital, hire enough nurses, and get better care.

Bedridden for a long time, bed sores inevitably developed on her back. Large and small sores were embedded in the skin, and the rotten places were filled with pus, which made her unable to sleep all night.

I couldn't relieve her pain one iota.

As a teenager, there are almost zero ways to get money.Seeing that the numbers on the passbook are getting smaller and smaller, I have nowhere to go.

Standing outside the iron gate of the rich family my mother married into was almost frozen until a servant ran out: The hostess said she didn’t know you.

I bowed my head and walked out for a long time on the street where there are big and small villas, my lips were purple.

When someone slapped her on the back, she didn't feel like turning her head back.

The mother huddled in a dark fur coat, holding a sleeping baby in her arms, with a ruddy and fair face.She quickly delivered an envelope, and whispered, "I only have this little cash."

I took it in a daze.

She followed up: "Don't come again."

She didn't care if I came or not, what she was afraid of was being seen coming.

Mother hurried back to the villa along the original road, opened the hidden side door, and quickly disappeared behind the low bushes.

I squeezed the envelope in my hand, my brain was still too frozen to think.

On the day I got the money, I didn't even attend class, and hurried to the hospital to pay the fee.Because the arrears were too long, the faces of the medical staff were already very ugly.

The moment I got the payment slip, I finally let go of my long-hanging heart. I went to the ward and asked my grandma what she wanted to eat. I can buy it if I have money.

Grandma said she had no appetite, and I held her hand until night, sleeping on the couch next to her.

In the early hours of the morning, grandma woke up in pain and said she was uncomfortable.

I said you haven't eaten all day, would you like me to get you some.

Grandma said she wanted porridge.

I immediately put on my clothes, took the stainless steel lunch box and went to the cafeteria.It was too early, it was still dark, and the cafeteria was not open.

Waiting in the cold wind until 05:30 in the morning, as soon as the cafeteria opened, I rushed in to make porridge.

When she returned to the ward, grandma fell on the bed, with one arm hanging outside the bed, her pupils had already dilated.

She died unaccompanied and still in pain, doctors said.

I returned to the countryside with my grandmother's ashes.

There were no next of kin to notify and no condolence service.

When people have no money, there are even fewer options for burial.

I almost didn't graduate from high school because of so many missed classes.

A few months later, the subordinates sent by President Cheng got the news from nowhere and came to this remote area to look for me.

But they came too late.

I don't need money anymore.

I hated my mother, and I hated my father, even though they didn't last long in my life.

I also hate the whole Cheng family.

I realized I was a tragedy about to happen.