round spring

The turbulent Spring Festival and birthdays press down on the little wishes of young people, and I am that little boy.

——An Yuan's Diary

Every word of gossip fell into An Yuan's ears.

He and Lin Hao walked slowly behind those gossiping adults, Lin Hao also heard it, and kept looking for something to divert An Yuan's attention.

"Xiao Yuan'er will sit and eat with me later?"

An Yuan shook his head dully after a while, "I'm with my brother."

Lin Hao pulled his arm, but Anyuan's chest kept jumping wildly, walking slower and slower.

The few people were still discussing in low voices, but a cold male voice suddenly interrupted them, "What is the righteous way? What is the crooked way? What is abnormal?"

Those who were talking about it just now all shut up. Seeing that it was Shen Xingchun, the adults didn't say anything, and changed the topic.

An Yuan recognized that it was Shen Xingchun's voice, his beating heart seemed to have finally found a place to rest, he took away Lin Hao's hand holding his arm, walked around the people in front of him, ran to Shen Xingchun's side, and held him hand, wrapped his whole hand in Shen Xingchun's palm.

"Brother, you are back."

Shen Xingchun felt the cold temperature in the palm of his hand, gently rubbed Anyuan's fingers with his fingertips, and pulled him to turn around, "Cold, your hands are so cold."

An Yuan raised his voice and said: "It was very cold just now, but it's not cold anymore, brother, have you seen Brother Shan Bao?"

"He was not found."

"Maybe, he's somewhere else."

An Yuan thought that the person named Liu Shanbao might not have been locked up by his parents. Grandma said yesterday that he has a good relationship with his brother, and that a person who has a good relationship with his brother cannot be a bad person, let alone a pervert.

Although An Yuan had never met Liu Shanbao, he firmly believed in Shen Xingchun.

The house of Liu Shanming's house is bigger than grandma's house, there are eight tables in the main room and the side room, and An Yuan and Shen Xingchun sat at a table near the corner during the wedding banquet at noon.

Shen Xingchun was called away by some children halfway, and An Yuan couldn't find him when he wanted to go to the toilet. He knew the location of the toilet and went out by himself.

Walking to the back of the room, he saw two small rooms, which were apparently hastily built later, much lower and simpler than the tile-roofed house with banquets in front.

A heavy, rusted iron lock was dropped outside the door of the hut. There were two small windows on the wall that did not face the sun, and a few wooden sticks were nailed to the outside of the windows.

An Yuan glanced into the window through the gap of the wooden stick. He felt that there was someone inside, and the people inside were also looking at him. He guessed it was Liu Shanbao.

The lunatics in those populations.

Sure enough, a figure slowly moved to the window under An Yuan's gaze. There was a thick layer of frost on the glass window, and the light in the room was dim. very thin.

Although the person inside cannot be seen clearly, the voice inside can be heard. When the person inside speaks, the voice is as if it has been repeatedly and roughly polished by sandpaper. It was as if he was making a human voice with all his strength, and he was panting heavily.

"Child, whose family are you from?"

An Yuan stood where he was, and replied, "I am Shen Xingchun's younger brother."

"Dachun's younger brother?" Liu Shanbao asked.

"Ah."

"Aren't you Shen Rui? I remember how old Shen Rui is. When did Dachun have a younger brother?"

"A few days ago," An Yuan introduced himself, "My name is An Yuan."

"An Yuan, that's a nice name, how old are you?"

"I'm 12, and I'm going to be 13 in two days. How about you? What's your name?"

"My name is Liu Shanbao. I am much older than you. I am 26 years old."

……

The two were chatting sentence by sentence, when An Yuan heard Shen Xingchun calling him from the front, "Xiao Yuan'er, Xiao Yuan'er..."

An Yuan responded loudly in the direction of the voice: "Brother, I'm behind the house."

Shen Xingchun ran over and walked to his side, "Why did you run out by yourself? Why didn't you eat inside?"

"I just want to go to the toilet," An Yuan said, pointing to the window of the hut, "The person inside is brother Shanbao."

Shen Xingchun followed An Yuan's fingers and saw Liu Shanbao standing behind the window. He took An Yuan's hand and walked two steps towards the window, "Brother Shanbao, you are inside. I knocked on the door just now. Didn't you?" see you."

When he got close, An Yuan saw clearly that Liu Shanbao was indeed very thin, skin-to-bone skinny, his cheeks were deeply sunken, his face was as white as snow, whiter than snow, pale, and his eyes were pale. Hollow, with obvious blue veins on the neck.

"I was sleeping just now, so I didn't hear you." Liu Shanbao said.

Shen Xingchun knew that this was a prevarication, so he didn't ask any more questions. He chatted with Liu Shanbao and asked about his current situation. They talked about very common topics.

Talk about the cold weather and today's wedding banquet.

Shen Xingchun saw that Liu Shanbao was in a normal state, and was a little puzzled: "Brother Shanbao is fine now, why are your parents still locking you in?"

Liu Shanbao behind the window twitched the corners of his mouth indifferently, and said: "They are afraid that I will suddenly get sick, so it's fine to lock me up. Today is Shanming's happy event, so there can be no mistakes. I'm fine here, and I'm clean. "

"Has Brother Shan Bao eaten?"

"Eat, my mother brought it to me just now," Liu Shanbao looked at An Yuan: "Your brother?"

Shen Xingchun gave a "hmm", "my brother."

"The kid is not afraid of me at all."

An Yuan answered: "Because you are brother's friend, brother's friend, don't be afraid."

Shen Xingchun smiled and hugged Anyuan's shoulders, and said to Liu Shanbao, "Brother Shanbao is not a bad person, so what are you afraid of?"

Liu Shanbao was silent for a while, his eyes suddenly lost focus, and there was a deep black tone in his pupils, he began to talk to himself intermittently.

"I'm not a bad person, but I'm crazy and everyone else is afraid of me."

"I know I'm abnormal most of the time. In fact, I prefer the unconscious state. Only when I'm unconscious can I see him. In this dark hut, I know he's always by my side. I……"

"I feel sober right now, and I don't like being sober right now."

"What's wrong with liking someone? Besides, he's dead and I'm still alive. It's painful."

"I'm not a pervert, nor a lunatic..."

"There's nothing wrong with liking someone."

……

When Shen Xingchun brought An Yuan back for dinner, An Yuan was absent-minded all the time, he kept thinking about Liu Shanbao.

Thinking about it, I got a little thirsty. I didn't even look at it. I took the cup in front of me, raised my head and took a big sip. After he swallowed it, he realized that what he was drinking was wine. The pungent alcohol burned from the tip of his tongue to his stomach. Inside, the hot wine was churning in his stomach.

He put down the water glass, only to realize that it was not the glass he just used, but the wine glass of the man sitting next to him just now, but he didn't know where he went now, and the water glass was placed by An Yuan's hand.

An Yuan stuck out his tongue and vomited for a long time. The woman sitting opposite him watched him drink and laughed a few times, "Look, Dachun, your brother drank the wine like water."

Shen Xingchun looked at An Yuan's little face flushed red from the alcohol, and passed his own cup, "Hurry up and drink some water, little fool, why are you still drinking?"

An Yuan drank a full glass of boiled water to dilute the taste of alcohol in his mouth, but his stomach still felt like it was on fire.

In the end he was still drunk, and Shen Xingchun went back with him behind his back.

An Yuan lay on Shen Xingchun's back, laughing and laughing for a while, and Shen Xingchun asked him what he was enjoying, and he said that lying on his brother's back felt very comfortable.

After he finished the music, he cried again, crying about Liu Shanbao, about the wine on the wine table, about Shen Xingchun's unsteady feet just now, and the dissatisfaction that the two of them almost slipped and fell.

In the end, An Yuan didn't remember how she got home, or how she fell asleep.

Before dawn the next day, he was awakened by a knock on the door with howls.

Outside the door was a woman's heart-piercing cry: "Uncle Shen, please open the door quickly, go and see my Shanbao, Shanbao has hanged himself, my Shanbao has hanged himself, Uncle Shen, please go and save him, I When I found out this morning, his body was already cold. If I had known, I would not have objected. My Shanbao is dead now. Uncle Shen, go and see my Shanbao..."

The woman's cry floated into the room softly and heavily.

Grandpa Shen and Grandma Shen quickly got up and put on their clothes.

Grandma Shen's hands were shaking when she put on clothes, "The old man is outside Shanbao's mother, what did she just say?"

Grandpa Shen heard it clearly, "She said Shanbao hanged himself."

Grandma Shen's eyes became dark for a while, her feet were soft, "Oh my god, I told Shanbao's mother yesterday when I was cooking, she said that Shanbao's illness is getting less and less, and she also said Shan Bao may be getting better soon, so why, why..."

Grandpa Shen put on his clothes and helped Grandma Shen get off the kang, "Let's go and have a look, I guess..."

Grandpa Shen said half of what he said, but Grandma Shen had already guessed, her body was cold, how could she be saved.

The Liu family had just finished their wedding and funeral. It snowed all night, and the red firecracker debris on the street turned white overnight.

Shen Xingchun and An Yuan also heard it, and they were quiet for a long time.

An Yuan thought of Liu Shanbao who was like a dead branch yesterday, and thought of what he said yesterday, with continuous puzzlement and sadness in his throat, "Brother, why are you crazy and dead when you like someone?"

Shen Xingchun's mind was still blank, he felt a little regretful, what Liu Shanbao said yesterday was a little abnormal, if he was more sensitive, remind his parents, maybe...

But there was no longer a possibility, and it took him a long time to speak.

"There's nothing wrong with liking someone, you won't be crazy, and you won't die."

But this sentence does not seem to be convincing at the moment.

Liu Shanbao liked a person, and in the end he went crazy, and now he is dead.

No matter how heavy the mourning snow was, it still stopped on the morning of the New Year's Eve.

After An Yuan woke up, before he had time to feel sorry for this too turbulent Spring Festival for him, he heard Shen Xingchun's first words to him. The turmoil in his heart had not even started yet, but it had already been suppressed to a smooth level. .

With his eyes still closed, Shen Xingchun heard the sound of turning over beside him, and pinched An Yuan's face in the dark, "Happy birthday, Xiao Yuaner, one year older, that's great."

"Thank you brother, happy new year brother, you are also one year older, and I am thirteen."

"I am seventeen."

"Seventeen is great." An Yuan said.

"Thirteen is fine," Shen Xingchun said, "Does Xiaoyuan have any birthday wishes?"

An Yuan nodded, "Yes, there are many, but I can't be too greedy, three is enough."

"Which three, tell brother?"

"The first wish is that my father can come back soon, the second wish is that everyone around me is safe and sound, father, grandpa, grandma, and brother, and the third wish is..."

When An Yuan said this, he paused for a moment, and did not continue.

Shen Xingchun asked him: "What is the third wish?"

"I said the third one, don't laugh at me."

Shen Xingchun probably guessed that the third wish was for a little boy, with the little care of a boy, he said seriously: "I won't make fun of you."

Only then did An Yuan speak: "My third wish is that if I have someone I like in the future, I won't make him crazy, and I won't be crazy either."