Red dust kills beauty

23. Mother liquor ②

I've been dreaming a lot lately.

In the dream, I seemed to be a teenager, because my vision was a little lower, my wrists and ankles were too thin, and I didn't feel like I had grown up at all.

The "I" in the dream walks alone on a barren snow field most of the time.The sky is high and the earth is far away, and there is no one in the wilderness. In the silent and barren world, only the sound of snow falling can be heard.

"I" is full of confusion and helplessness - who is "I"? Where does "I" come from?Where are you going again?

The loneliness and desolation in my heart is exactly the same as that of me many years ago.I used to wake up in the battlefield, confused and at a loss, and I also looked half-dead.

The battlefield is a place where all human emotions are magnified and swallowed up.Whether it is gunpowder smoke, shrapnel, explosions, fly ash, or dirty blood, wounds, wailing, and death, they are all dirty, like the grease on the range hood, which cannot be wiped clean.Later, I became so lively, like colorful colors, and like to express my emotions exaggeratedly. I think it all has something to do with who I was at the time.

It really took me many years and Fu Baixue's company all the way to become what I am today.But the "I" in the dream doesn't have Fu Baixue, so it's no wonder that I have no words or intentions, and I look like an idiot who doesn't understand anything.

Every time I wake up from this kind of scene, I feel very annoyed because I think of bad memories every time.

There's something else besides this scene that keeps repeating and repeating itself.

Some are "I" with an uncle.That uncle can't see clearly his figure and appearance, but I always vaguely feel that he is a little familiar.

The "I" in the dream is very close and admires each other.There is a recurring scene where he and I are in a cabin, drinking beetroot soup while warming up around the fireplace.The orange-red, warm firelight, sweet and sour food, and "us" talking and laughing happily.

He should be a very, very important person, right?But every time I wake up after dreaming of this scene, the feeling left in my heart is endless grievance and sorrow.

In the dream, I dreamed of this person repeatedly, and the seemingly endless falling snow. These are the two scenes that I remember most clearly.

But of course there are others.For example, a tall, rebellious young man, a young man who looks a bit like me in fancy clothes, and a man with a light breath on his thumb all the year round.

Their faces and figures also seemed to be covered in frosted glass, so I couldn't see them clearly.

Sometimes I can vaguely detect that "I" is happy when I am with them.But that happiness is also very shallow and light, because many feelings "I" neither understand nor experience.The feeling after waking up was even more excruciating. The feeling of being lost, as if being stabbed into the chest from the back, was still lingering in my heart for a long time. Kelian, as if she lost even the desire to raise her arms and get up from the bed.

The world is hard, I don't want to live anymore.jpg

Getting up from the bed again, I stood in front of the sink, lowered my whole head and flushed cold water into the water pipe, trying to wake myself up and separate dreams from reality.

The feelings in the dream really affected me. I felt that I was quite numb in the past, but I didn’t expect that the me in the dream was even more numb and lacking in love. I lived like a marionette. It's a typical example of Pidianpidian selling himself out—fuck, thinking about it this way, I thank Fu Baixue from the bottom of my heart.

Fortunately, he appeared in my life early and picked me up when I was still a fool. Otherwise, the ghost knows what I am now, and whether I will also meet a bad old man with malicious intentions and give me to me. scam.

And I always feel that these dreams are allegorical, or I suspect that they are things that I have experienced in the past.

By the way, did I really not know Fu Baixue before, let alone the other two people - a peacock with peacock hair and a irascible brother, I don't have such a character around me (although peacock with peacock has a sense of déjà vu) - But even though the man with the thumb ring doesn't know what he looks like, his aura is really similar to Fu Baixue's!

I couldn't help thinking, if I knew him before, why didn't he recognize me?

As a result, Fu Baixue denied it, which immediately made me very confused.

"Why did you suddenly think of this?" He asked me strangely.

I slowly got up from the desk, and fell back on the back of the seat after not sitting upright for two seconds: "I dreamed of a man, and I thought it was you—if only it was you."

"..." He didn't speak for a long time.

Noticing that his silence was unusual, I turned around and saw his slightly troubled yet slightly happy expression.

"?"

He probably stretched out his hand to touch me, but he stopped halfway and retracted it.He said helplessly: "Since you already have Xiaoshang, don't say such irresponsible words to others."

"!" I was shocked.

I was shocked not because I just thought of the question of avoiding suspicion, because—how should I put it, everyone is male, and the world is still so chaotic. If you use the moral standards hundreds of years ago to demand yourself, is Fu Baixue too saintly? a little.

What I said is not to excuse myself, but how could one set of rules be used in troubled times and peaceful times.Besides, no matter how nicely we say it, what we do is a business of licking blood with a knife head. We can't use other violent means to release our nature like Yu Jingchun, because the purpose of the Self-Defense Forces is to protect—sex is almost the only way to vent way.

As for when we were mercenaries, it was even more confusing.

So I don't have any concept of keeping chastity for the witch merchant, let alone I regard him as a younger brother (although this statement is a bit bitch), and I haven't had a serious relationship with him now-and I don't think the word "shou chastity" , is it ridiculous for a powerhouse of our level?

Fu Baixue, as the love rival of the witch merchant, told me that what you said was irresponsible, which shocked me for a whole year.

I blinked incomprehensibly, and said in astonishment: "This is why you have been so alienated from me recently?"

You may not believe me, but in fact, Fu Baixue and I were very close before.

I often lean on his shoulder, sit back to back with him, lie on his lap, hooking my fingers with his; and he likes to stroke my hair, and gently fiddle with my eyelashes after I fall asleep, Or the occasional pinch of my wrist.

But all these actions suddenly became much less after Zhaoyao and witch merchants appeared in our lives.Before, I only thought that he was alienating me, but I didn't understand why he was alienating me, but it turned out to be because of this.

I wonder if there is something wrong with this Beta - I suspect that Lao Bai has been dead for a long time, and I am serious.

Although I didn't say it, the suspicion in my eyes was probably already obvious. Fu Baixue rarely showed an angry expression, and pressed my head hard on his shoulder: "I'm thinking about something messy... Very good!"

I rolled in his arms, laughing hey.

"Everyone is a person who has today but no tomorrow. What are you thinking about so much?"

Fu Baixue sighed, and closed the loose skirts for me.

The doubts in my heart have not been answered, and I am still daydreaming.Until one day, a witch merchant returned from a trip and handed me a bottle of strange liquid.This thing is packed in a 500ml reagent bottle. The liquid in the glass bottle is light red and viscous.

"What is this?" I asked, frowning.

He smiled and said: "Mother's liquor. I helped someone a little, this is a thank you gift from the other party."

The witch merchant is neither a petty love hidden by my golden house, nor sold to the Self-Defense Forces. He has his own affairs to be busy.But as soon as the Self-Defense Forces sealed the cave, there was mother liquor flowing out of it, so it was obvious that someone from the Self-Defense Forces was guarding and stealing.

In the face of the great enemy, this group of people are still doing this kind of deception. It's really annoying.

"Is this the mother liquor?"

To hide the unhappiness in my heart, I leaned over and looked up and down curiously. Just as I was about to unplug the plug and smell the smell, I was blocked by the witch merchant.

"Don't be dead, have you forgotten that this thing is a special attack on spiritual power users?"

I retorted, "But it's only a vial! And that's just our guesswork."

Although the situation of the three of us was serious at the time, Lao Bai was not affected at all. He is also a psychic, so I don't think this assumption is valid.

"I am more inclined to have a problem with Mr. Fu, he is too mysterious."

Hearing what he meant, I was even more upset.

Why does everyone come up to me and say that Lao Bai has a problem.I know Fu Baixue's secrets better than any of you, and I don't mind why you bother so much.

I curled my lips and raised my hands sullenly: "Shut up, I just don't touch it."

Probably seeing my depression, the witch merchant pinched my fingers, and changed the subject half-coaxingly, "Speaking of it, I always feel like I've seen this before."

I'm getting some interest.

He pretended to think: "It seems that when I was very young, my biological father took me to do experiments...then...then what happened?...I forgot."

"..." Is this person cheating on me?

The witch merchant raised his head in shock: "—I actually forgot."

He was so distressed that he felt sincerely: "It's strange... When did it happen? I have an impression of this thing. I must have faced it before, but I just can't remember..."

In fact, I can understand his shock.

The witch merchant is that kind of very, very rare genius, probably due to the influence of mental power. His memory is surprisingly good, and he can be called a photographic memory. He once told me that everything that happened from childhood to adulthood, he remember.

So now he actually has a fragmented memory, which is very strange.

Could it be related to something evil like mother liquor?Does it affect human memory?If this is the case, it can also explain why I lost my memory before, and why I keep dreaming now.

After the witch merchant fell asleep in the middle of the night, I put on my clothes and got up, went to the locker where the bottle of mother liquor was placed, stared at the small bottle of light red liquid, and meditated with my hands behind my back.

Does it really carry my memory?What do I have to do to get them back?

As soon as I stuck my fingers out, I heard a voice from upstairs: "Brother, what are you doing?"

I withdrew my hand, and the person who rushed back showed a smile: "Azhao, why are you up?"

After he protested fiercely against the nickname Zhao Zhao, I took the next best thing and started calling him Ah Zhao.

Zhaoyao rubbed her eyes childishly, she probably slept soundly just now, his neck and forehead were sweaty, very cute.

"Get up to go to the bathroom, and feel the smell of you downstairs, so come and have a look."

Once again, I sigh with emotion that this is the big Alpha of the future. They can't smell anything, and their instincts make them pay attention to the movements of the prey on the territory-although this prey is much stronger than him.

I originally wanted to say a few perfunctory words to tell him to go back, but suddenly I remembered a certain scene in my dream and asked: "Zhao Zhao, when you grow up, will you want to wear leather clothes, ride a motorcycle and wear earrings?"

"...?" Zhaoyao froze for a moment, then said foolishly, "I haven't thought about it."

I waved my hand and was about to chase him away, but I heard him hesitate again: "But... I think that kind of dress seems to be not bad?"

Originally it was just a trivial matter, but two weeks later, on the day Zhaoyao turned twelve, I was preparing food with Lao Bai in the kitchen, and the witch merchant came back with Zhaoyao.

I noticed that the boy had a pierced right ear with a diamond embedded in it.

"..." I stared at his attire without speaking.

He felt uncomfortably stared at by me, touched his red and swollen earlobe: "What's wrong?"

"Why did you suddenly think of piercing your ears?" I asked.

His eyes dodged a little, and he asked me shyly and in a low voice: "...don't you like it?"

Next chapter: Mother Liquor③

Rather than thinking of the scenes in the dream as the past, I think it is more appropriate to say that they are the future.

Then a very interesting question arises, whether the present choice makes the future, or does the future make the present choice?

The author says:

In the foreshadowing & excessive chapter, Aning is going to recover his memory, and Lao Bai pretending to be B will also be caught.

In the previous chapters, some readers said that Ah Ning put all of Gongquan under the same roof, because he didn't think there was any problem with it at all, and he had no concept of chastity.

My roommate said that I have to be kind to readers, let me write early, and don't let the cuties stay up late.I'm trying to do it now.