Absurd Comedy ABO

10. Dreamland

They eventually broke up and never explored the subject again.To be precise, he has been hiding, and Lin is so smart, so naturally he will not force him.The topic of surgery was also dropped, and he guessed that Lin would not go without his support.He also wasn't sure why he was so confident, who he was, and how he could influence Lin's decision.But he also felt that Lin probably didn't have the courage to make such a decision. After all, surgery was still risky. If he couldn't get the support of his only ally, how could he muster up the courage.Of course, Lin can also find some other allies, new allies, who can support him.But now besides him, Lin really has nothing else to rely on.They are dependent on each other in a real sense, how can Lin not care about him.

He could just let it go, pretend he didn't know, and when Lin's courage wore off they could be together forever.But if one day Lin figured it out on his own, he would still leave, and it would definitely be more thorough.If he took the initiative to encourage Lin, there might be a chance, and he could see that Lin was really disappointed.

His absent-mindedness has returned, and he always thinks of Lin, more of the past.Of course I miss it very much, but at the same time, I still have a little dissatisfaction, or fear.Lin would never have known him if this hadn't happened.After surgery, everything goes back to normal.But if he cut off Lin's opportunity because of his own selfish desires, he would also feel guilty.

At such moments, he had a dream, which helped him.

It was an ordinary dream, an ordinary sight.He dreamed he was in high school?Maybe college, after all no one wears uniforms.He's in a place like a school, an auditorium, he's in the auditorium.This is a very classic scene, and most of Lin's memories are about it.He was alone in the auditorium, and when he looked up, it was Lin.But he couldn't hear what Lin was saying, as if the sound was on mute, he could only watch.But everything is like a movie scene. When the light hits Lin, he shines, like the leading actor, like Gatsby, but lacks a background of fireworks.

In the next second, there was no one in the auditorium, and he was the only one left.He waited for a while, but there was no change, and Lin didn't come back.He had no choice but to stand up, and then walked out the door following the memory.But outside the door is not the campus scene, but the next scene.It was a ball hall, he remembered, a Christmas ball, and there was a Christmas tree in the corner.Everyone is holding small cakes or wine glasses, and someone is waltzing in the middle of the dance floor.He can be sure that it is a university, and this kind of dance is only held by a university.

He's on the edge, and he's always been the one on the edge.Then he saw the crowd disperse, this time the dream had voices.He didn't understand what happened, he wanted to ask someone, but he didn't know how to ask.Then he saw Lin in the middle of the dance floor, with someone in his arms.He wanted to leave, but also wanted to take a closer look.But he still got closer, and then he saw that the person in Lin Huai was him.

He has never had such an honor, even in his dream, this is the first time.Everything seemed to be in slow motion, and he watched the two of them spin, still waltz.But all he could think of at the time was that he couldn't dance.There was probably only time for one dance, or none at all, and he woke up.

He seemed to be crying, but he didn't seem to, it was early autumn but he was awakened by the heat.He felt sweaty and his heart was beating fast like he had a nightmare.I don't know if I should say nervous or sad.He lay down slowly against the wall again, took a few deep breaths to calm himself down, and at the same time recalled the dream again.

He remembered the dance again, in the dream he was a third person.But recalling it now, he seemed to be in Lin's arms. Maybe it was because they danced together, or waltz. Although they didn't dance often, they still had some impressions.But Lin in this memory is not as shining as in the dream, but blind and lame, and even tripped by himself.

Now he started crying, this time for sure.He twitched at first, and then his voice gradually became louder, and it would not be too abrupt to be buried under the quilt.He cried for a while, and finally made up his mind for Lin and himself.Lin should still shine like before, be a leading actor, not what he is now.

He stayed up all night and found Lin early the next day.Even at the time of breakfast, I was anxious and restless.He waited a long time before Lin put down his spoon and pushed the plate away.He spoke almost immediately.

I've thought about it, about what happened before.He said.

Lin obviously hadn't reacted yet. He paused for a moment before continuing to ask questions about what was going on.

It was about the surgery.he said, but very quietly.

Oh, Lin seemed a little unexpected and paused again.In fact, I have a new idea, Lin said, I think the previous decision was too hasty, let's wait and see.

So you're going to forego surgery?he asks.

Lin nodded.

He should have felt happy, at least he didn't have to worry about it anymore, Lin had already made his choice.Ironically, he didn't feel relaxed at all, but felt that his ambiguous attitude had drained Lin's courage.

Why do you think that, he asked.

That operation is too dangerous, and the success rate is not high, I don't need to take this risk.Lin said, his tone was flat, but he could hear a feeling of resignation.And it's not entirely unacceptable now that, despite its flaws, it's always more important to be alive.Lin paused when he said this, but I also plan to reduce your workload.

Before he could say anything, Lin continued.Don't be nervous, Lin said, don't be nervous, it's not against you, but it's time for me to learn to rely on myself.It’s always more reliable to be yourself, at least not worrying about what it’s like to be left behind.

Looking at Lin's expression, his heart almost broke.He wants to say that he will never abandon Lin, as long as Lin does not abandon him, then he will always be here.But the words are so pale, how can he convince Lin that he has indeed loved him for many years and will never leave?Thinking about it the other way around, if Lin confessed to him affectionately, would he believe it?He can only prove it with actions, at least make Lin healthy first.How can a person who is full of obstacles not depend on others?Even frequent replacement of nurses only speeds up the cycle and does not change the fact that he was left behind.Lin was left behind, alone in a foreign country, without relatives or even friends, and had to rely on nurses to take care of her.He loves Lin very much, but what's the use of that?Lin can't rely on his love to get healthy, return to the center of the stage, and find all his relatives and friends. What is his love, it's just moving himself.

I think you should do the cleaning.He finally said it, and everything after the first sentence was much simpler. He never thought that he could talk about how much he liked Lin and hoped that Lin would get better so calmly.He even memorized those hard-to-pronounce medical words and numbers. He said he wanted Lin to get better, and he analyzed the success rate with reason. He had never been so smart.

do you really think soIt took Lin a long time to speak, but his voice sounded very excited.

He might still want to have surgery, he thought, and said yes again.

let me think again.Lin said.The voice is much more cheerful.He can almost guess the ending, and Rin goes back for surgery, hoping he will recover.Then Lin would leave him.

His depressed thoughts were interrupted by a kiss, and Lin took his hand in the wheelchair and kissed the back of his hand.She took his hand again and made him squat down, kissing his forehead.

Thank you, Lin said, I love you.It wasn't loud, but he could hear it clearly.

Now he also somehow kindled a little hope, maybe Lin won't leave, he thought.Maybe this time the dream will come true.