my zepple

The things I have seen are absolutely unbelievable to you humans

I've seen warships ablaze on the tip of Orion

I watched the C-rays flicker in the dark near Tannhauser's Gate

All these moments will pass in time

---

Then there is the long intensive training, entrance exam, and school exam that every art student has to go through.

The old man in the studio strongly recommended Tong Yu to a studio next to the Academy of Fine Arts, and Tong Yu went to Shanghai alone with heavy luggage.Ms. Xu You also contacted Song Rou in Beijing for tutoring in a music classroom and a familiar professor.

The two of them didn't meet each other when they returned to C City for the entrance exam at the end of the year. When they met again, it was already in the spring of 2015. The school opened a special culture class for art students who returned to school to supplement their culture.

Tong Yu actually never thought that Song Rou would also come to the cultural class. After all, he has a good cultural background, and it would be more efficient to find a tutor for targeted tutoring.But Song Rou said that the pace of review at school would be better.

So Song Rou took the book and sat next to him again.

But this spring Tongyu's state is very bad.The entrance exam and school exam took up most of the time of each art student, leaving very little time for the culture class to sprint.He became very agitated because of it.

Tong Yu really wanted to prepare for the exam, but this obsession made his dyslexia come back, and he began to fail to understand the questions again.Even if there is no problem with the English vocabulary, he has no way to connect English words into sentences.

The most hopeless thing about mental illness is that sometimes it can become a curse that you know will happen, but you can't get rid of it with all your strength.

Simply put, the more you try to do something, the less you can do it.

Tong Yu didn't know why, once he wanted to do something well, his body would reflexively resist.

For example, when he starts to pay attention to the way he breathes, he will forget how to breathe, and then he will be out of breath.Another example is that if he wants to read a book seriously, he will find that he can't concentrate no matter what.

It usually started when he couldn't read, and he would habitually read entire sentences in one breath to force his attention.But at the same time, the breathing disorder after the breath-holding will also attract his attention, and then he will fall into hyperventilation out of control.

He had to open his mouth and nose to compete for air, and his lungs became a shameless bottomless pit.At this time, he may fall to the ground in embarrassment, like a dying fat fish left on the shore with its gills glued together.

Song Rou saved him several times.

He reacted quickly and put a plastic bag over Tong Yu's mouth and nose, which can increase the dead space of the respiratory tract and reduce the loss of exhaled carbon dioxide.Just like the old man in the studio did.

Tong Yu would close his eyes and wait for the spasm of the airway to stop, and then his breathing would gradually subside in the plastic bag.

He would open his eyes to look at Song Rou one second before everything subsides, his eyes filled with physiological tears.

At that moment, he could clearly feel the boiling in his blood, the joy that could not find its source, the helpless pain, and the embarrassment that could not be shaken off.

Song Rou also asked him: "You are not in a good condition recently, have you been to the hospital?"

Tong Yu only nodded and said, "The doctor said that the college entrance examination is too stressful."

"Gome's cultural score requirements are not high."

At this time, he would shake his head again, take out the new English weekly newspaper from the hole in the table and start writing.Then it was inevitable to fall back into that nightmare cycle again.

One morning Song Rou dragged him to skip class, he smiled and said, "Combine work with rest, I'll take you to a place."

Then they went to the high-speed rail station to buy tickets, and took the high-speed rail for an hour to the city Y next door.

After getting off the high-speed rail, Song Rou and Tong Yu shuttled through the streets of City Y with ease.Finally took him to a private art gallery.

Tong Yu saw Song Rou standing at the door and making a phone call, and after a while a girl in her 20s came to open the door.

"Xiao Rou? Why are you here?"

"My dad said that you guys are making weather plans recently, so take my classmates to have a look."

Song Rou followed the girl into the hall of the art gallery with her pockets in her pocket. He introduced to Tong Yu, "My cousin, Song Zhi."

The hall of the exhibition hall is a bit dark, with only some faint guiding lights.Song Zhi told them, "Wait a minute, I'll turn on the electricity."

After a while they saw the end of the hall suddenly lit up, a red sun hanging above, and a fine mist gradually rising around it.

"I only have lemon juice here, my sister doesn't want to mop the floor, so don't spill it on the floor."

Song Zhi handed the two glasses to Song Rou, and she couldn't help pinching Tong Yu's face: "Kids are having fun, call me sister if you have anything to do."

Tong Yu nodded blankly, Song Rou patted Song Zhi's hand off: "Go to work."

Song Zhi withdrew his hand with a smile, and went to take the elevator with his skirt.

Tong Yu was still in a daze, he looked up at the top of his head, there were shadows of him and Song Rou in the distance, it was a huge mirror.

Song Rou walked up to him and explained: "The weather project, the weather project. The weather project that Eliasson exhibited at London's Tate Modern in 2003. Recently they moved this project to City Y, and it will officially open to the public tomorrow."

"The sun is actually a semi-disk composed of more than 200 low-sodium single-frequency lamps. The ceiling is covered with mirror foil, and the semicircle is reflected by the mirror foil to form a perfect circle."

Song Rou pointed to the red sun at the end and said.

"What are these smogs?" Tong Yu looked at the smog that could not find its source and asked doubts.

"It's clouds, dusk simulated by water mist. Do you smell it?"

Tong Yu took a slow breath, then rolled his eyes, and asked loudly, "Is it sweet?"

Then Tong Yu saw Song Rou's lips slightly raised in the twilight, "Yes."

He raised his head in the clouds and said to Tong Yu: "Dusk is a mixture of pure water and sucrose."

Then Tong Yu saw Song Rou's slender legs step forward, spread her arms, the pair of white Converse canvas shoes lightly spun on the ground, and then fell backwards.

"Hello!" Tong Yu ran forward to catch him, panting.

Song Rou was lying on the ground with a sullen smile. The loose plaid shirt was messily opened, and the light blue jeans made her legs slender. He bent one long leg and stepped on the ground casually, patting the ground beside him lazily and saying : "You come too"

Tong Yu put the water glass by his feet, and lay down carefully.

Song Rou asked him, "Have you seen Blade Runner?"

"Seen."

Tong Yu folded her hands obediently on her stomach.

"I feel that the set in the movie is very similar to this place."

Song Rou nodded: "The weather plan is indeed the source of inspiration for some scenes of Blade Runner."

Tong Yu then asked: "Then... do you think those replicants are a pity?"

Ive seen things you people wouldn't believe.

Attack on fire off the shoulder of Orion.

Ivewatchedc-beamsglitterinthedarkneartheTannhauserGate.

All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

"You remember, what the last replicant said before he died."

Song Rou paused while speaking.

"Existence itself has meaning."

"It's the same with people."

"Instead of suffering and chasing some meaningless meaning for not fitting in. Let's bask in the sun, as we're doing now."

The red sun in the distance seemed to be really emitting heat, and the two of them felt warm.The air is dank and sweet, drowsy.

Tong Yu looked at the mirror foil on the top of the hall, the two people stretched out their limbs.Described to Song Rou: "We are like two twins in an oven."

Song Rou was amused again, he rubbed Tong Yu's head, it was really round.

Tong Yu's whole body's attention was focused on the scalp, and he only relaxed when Song Rou withdrew her hand.

He was a little lost: "Song Rou."

"Ok?"

"Will you be a singer in the future?"

"Maybe, but my hobby is composition."

"Maybe I'll form a band, maybe I'll write songs for others, maybe I'll sing them myself...whatever."

Then Song Rou looked at them on the mirror and asked Tong Yu: "What about you? Great painter?"

Tong Yu turned his head to the side, and he saw Song Rou's side face facing the blurred clouds, with thick and upturned eyelashes, a straight bridge of nose, and a sharp nose.

"I do not know."

Looking at Song Rou, Tong Yu always felt that this person looked good no matter what he looked at, so he continued, "I used to,"

He then sniffed and his voice became very low, "I used to think, maybe I can live to be 25 years old."

Song Rou turned her head slowly and asked him, "Why are you 25 years old?"

"do not know."

"It may also be because others say that a long life is considered complete. I think...at least a quarter of a circle. It probably only looks like a circle."

Tong Yu used his finger to draw an invisible circle in front of Song Rou's eyes following the red sun in the distance.

Song Rou grabbed his arm and was about to say something when she heard Tong Yu hiss and gasped.

Just as Tong Yu was about to pull out his arm, Song Rou quickly rolled up his sleeve, leaving cut marks on his exposed left arm.Song Rou's eyes darkened, and she turned sharply from the ground, kneeling on both sides of Tong Yu's body.

Song Rou put his hands together and rolled up his sleeves respectively.Sure enough, the two pure white arms were covered with cut marks, densely extending to the elbows.

Song Rou's voice became hoarse: "Did you cut it yourself?"

Tong Yu tried to twitch his arms, he closed his eyes, as if he didn't dare to look at Song Rou.Then he nodded: "When I'm reading, it's hard to concentrate."

As if afraid of Song Rou's troubles, he added: "It has been treated with alcohol."

Song Rou gently rolled down his sleeves and asked him: "Your academic performance is very good, why are you suddenly so nervous?"

Tong Yu withdrew his arm and moved his wrist.Song Rou's approaching posture made him a little shy, and he covered his eyes with the back of his hand.

After a while he said softly: "Song Rou."

"Ok?"

"Our country has never been beautiful, only the oil painting department of T University."

Tong Yu's heart was in his throat, he was afraid that Song Rou would be found out.

"First place in the entrance exam, did Gome pass?"

Song Rou spoke slowly, as if she was thinking about something.

Tong Yu quickly added: "On the day of the school exam, I had a fever."

Then there was silence.

In the end he heard Song Rou laugh, her tone relaxed: "That's not right, it's the same school again."

Tong Yu breathed a sigh of relief.

Then Song Rou asked again: "So you are worried about cultural achievements?"

Tong Yu withdrew the back of his hand, "Well, T University's cultural achievement requirements are much higher than Gome's."

Song Rou supported the ground with both hands, and got up from Tong Yu, "Your cultural foundation is not bad, but you are too nervous."

Tong Yu murmured, "I'm just afraid..."

Then he opened his mouth and couldn't continue talking.

Song Rou bent down, "What are you afraid of? It's not just one chance."

Tong Yu pursed his lips.

Song Rou stretched out her hand to him again, and said, "I'll be waiting for you at T University."

"As long as you think, this year, next year and the year after that."

"Any year will do."

The lines before the chapter are quoted from the movie Blade Runner 2019

The weather plan was used as inspiration for Blade Runner 2049, and here I wrote the first Blade Runner 2019 for the plot.

The weather plan device is real and should be available online.The picture is @饼厂 on Weibo, and you can find it by clicking the photo album.