rumor

What was left to Jiang Ruo was a longer and quieter silence.

Xi Yufeng's expression was almost blank, as if he heard some obscure language.

But the subconscious reaction couldn't be faked. Jiang Ruo didn't see even a little bit of surprise in his eyes, which proved that he was not unaware of this matter.

Jiang Ruo's feelings for Xi Yufeng are far beyond the reasonable range.

However, there is still a huge difference between knowing it well and hearing it with your own ears.

Xi Yufeng's thin lips were tightly pursed, and the eyes staring at Jiang Ruo became chaotic, and something incomprehensible was brewing in it.

After a long time, he opened his lips: "There is no absolute fairness in this world."

"I know." Jiang Ruo took a deep breath, suppressing tears, "But she can't tolerate me, and I can't tolerate her either."

"You can't give me what I want."

After saying this, Jiang Ruo felt extremely tired, as if all the strength in his body had been drained.

In fact, he was indeed empty, he cut open his heart, spread it out in front of Xi Yufeng, and said the words that should be hidden deeply and never mentioned, he admitted that he had a sliver of expectation in spite of his impulsiveness at that time.

A hint of the humble, the shameful, perhaps expecting the same response.

People really can't take chances, Jiang Ruo thought, now that even the last dignity has been lost, Xi Yufeng's calm and almost cold-blooded reaction is the greatest retribution.

The silence continued, and Jiang Ruo couldn't wait any longer.

With the last of his strength, he said, "Let me go."

Hearing this, Xi Yufeng felt disobedient and offended. He took a step forward and stopped Jiang Ruo: "Where are you going?"

"Anywhere, as long as it's not here."

"I'll find another place for you."

"……don't want."

"What do you want?"

Xi Yufeng felt irritated by being manipulated and coerced, and he had never retreated and accommodated anyone like this before.

But Jiang Ruo is always so ignorant, always misbehaved, and always makes him more angry.

Jiang Ruo looked at him with calm eyes, as if after saying that word just now, his heart also died.

"I want to leave you," he said, "to a place where I'll never see you again."

Not long after, Xi Yufeng knew that the feeling of being tightened in the heart at this moment was called fear.

But at the moment, he only felt that his heart was on fire, and he even felt betrayed. His brain automatically skipped rational analysis, and his body went first, raising his hand to grab Jiang Ruo's wrist.

"No." Xi Yufeng said in an undeniable tone, "I won't allow it."

Probably not expecting Xi Yufeng's reaction like this, Jiang Ruo was stunned for a moment: "But we have agreed that once you enter into a marriage relationship with someone else, the agreement will become invalid."

"Invalidation?" Xi Yufeng snorted softly, "Don't you know that clauses that are not stamped do not count?"

His head exploded, and Jiang Ruo opened his mouth, unable to speak for a while.

The grasped hand couldn't be freed, the more he retreated, the tighter the seat and the wind clenched, Jiang Ruo felt that his heart, which had sunk to the bottom of the valley, was submerged in ice water again, getting colder and colder bit by bit.

"Why?" he heard himself ask, "Don't you want me to get hurt, why don't you let me go?"

"It was an accident last time." Xi Yufeng said, "I will not put you in danger again."

Jiang Ruo shook his head: "You let me go, just let me go, I don't need you to—"

The words "no need" made Xi Yufeng's eyes darken, his face was as cold as his voice: "I'll film for you and make you famous, you don't need it after you use it up, just want to run away?"

Jiang Ruo thought that there would be nothing more painful than having his heart cut open, so Xi Yufeng's "use" gave him another blow, telling him to put himself in the right position and tell him how insignificant the so-called sincerity is in this relationship. worth mentioning.

The last lingering temperature also dissipated completely, Jiang Ruo gave up struggling dejectedly: "What do you want? What do I need to do to let me go?"

The situation turned around silently, every time Xi Yufeng heard the word "go", the sense of haste that he was about to lose something increased.

He was like a person walking in the dark, waving his hands in the air indiscriminately, his hands were cut into countless wounds by the branches on both sides of the road, but he still couldn't catch anything.

He didn't even know what he was trying to catch.

Only the unreasonable anger kept rising, and finally swallowed all reason.

Xi Yufeng heard himself say: "Lick, you can leave only when you make me happy."

Also as a man, it is impossible for Jiang Ruo not to know the meaning of "licking". It's not that he didn't think about doing this for Xi Yufeng when the love was strong before, but Xi Yufeng disagreed.

Although he didn't explain the reason at the time, Jiang Ruo knew that he thought it was a kind of contempt, a unilateral flattery from one person to another, and he didn't want to make himself feel uncomfortable.

And being willing and being ordered are two different things after all.

Jiang Ruo's face was pale, and the huge sense of shame made his squatting movements slow. When his eyes were level with the opponent's waist, and his trembling hands were about to touch the belt buckle, his wrist was grabbed again.

This time, Xi Yufeng directly pulled Jiang Ruo up from the ground and dragged him out.

When he was thrown onto the big bed in the master bedroom, Jiang Ruo had the illusion that all his bones were smashed to pieces.

Xi Yufeng quickly pressed up and leaned on him, his face was stern, his voice was low and almost fierce: "Is that why you want to leave?"

A physical tear came out of the corner of his eye, and Jiang Ruo nodded with difficulty under the strong shackles: "If you want to go, let me... go."

What responded to him was Xi Yufeng's rough movements.

First, the jacket was torn off and thrown under the bed. The sweater inside was not easy to take off, so the thread was simply torn off, and with a sting, the upper body was completely exposed in the air.

Next is the pants.Jiang Ruo reached out to push, but Xi Yufeng grabbed both wrists with one hand and pressed them over his head.

"Don't you like to climb on rich people's beds?" Xi Yufeng asked him, "Who are you pretending to be?"

The disparity in strength made Jiang Ruo unable to move, so he could only turn his face away and close his eyes, thinking it was the retribution of greed.

Who made their start so dirty, so disgusting.

But Xi Yufeng still didn't let him go, pinching his chin hard to force him to turn his head.

"When you were raped by Zhang Shaoyuan, did you have this expression?" Xi Yufeng returned to the high altar, looking down at Jiang Ruo condescendingly, "Or, I didn't give you enough?"

Later, Jiang Ruo understood that Xi Yufeng's anger was because he was disobedient, and because he repeatedly challenged his bottom line as a superior.

Xi Yufeng is still the tyrant who engraved his strength in his bones and blood. Even if this relationship has come to an end, he should control it and declare it to be terminated.

Jiang Ruo was pressed face down in the pillow, and suffered wave after wave of impacts, gasping for breath intermittently in pain. He didn't expect that he still had the strength to provoke.

"Xi, Mr. Xi is very elegant. For a broken shoe that you can wear with money, the overlord is not afraid, not afraid to spread the word, and be... er, laughed at."

It's a pity that this level of provocation is just a drizzle that doesn't hurt or itch to Yu Xi and Feng.

He sneered: "My birth was a joke, what is there to be afraid of?"

Later, after all, there have been so many physical interactions, it is inevitable to show some warmth to cover up those uncontrollable indiscretions.

Xi Yufeng turned Jiang Ruo over, leaned over and hugged him, and asked in a voice that was almost broken: "Didn't you say you love me, why did you leave?"

And Jiang Ruo was speechless, and his vision was so blurred that he couldn't see the faces so close.

Hearing no answer, Xi Yufeng asked again: "Is this your love?"

The word "love" was very unfamiliar to him, and the only relevant content in his memory was the almost crazy and suffocating control his mother had over his father.

I still remember that when he was 19 years old, he rushed back to see his mother for the last time, and the mother on the hospital bed shouted hoarsely - I love him, I love him so much, I want him to die with me!

If that is called love, then love should be entanglement, how could it be escape?

When it was over, it seemed to be raining outside.

Maybe it was hailstones, crackling on the window panes, like the prelude to the end of the world.

Xi Yufeng was lying flat on the bed, Jiang Ruo was lying on his side, the two of them were covered with a quilt, and for the first time they felt bitingly cold.

When the sound of the rain subsided, Jiang Ruo said in a hoarse voice, "My biological father died when I was seven years old.

"That year when I was just in primary school, the first grade, I thought I knew everything, but in fact I didn't know anything. When I got on the hearse with my father's photo, I saw my classmates waving to me, and I greeted him with a smile. , Said to bring my dad back and go to play with him. Later, when I went to the place and saw the whole room crying, I realized that my dad would never go home with me again.

"My mother has always disapproved of me learning to dance. She thinks that boys should not wear leggings, twist their waists and sway their hips. Most people around me think the same way. Children of the same age have no opinions. They believe what adults say. , I became what they called a sissy, the second chair. As I grew up, the rumors became more and more outrageous. Later, it was spread that I learned to dance to seduce men, saying that I was A little vixen born of a big vixen.

"I've heard this so much that even my mother believes it."

Jiang Ruo noticed that the people around him moved.He knew that Xi Yufeng was not curious about his past, and he didn't want to listen, but he had to say it.

Thoughts were messed up, Jiang Ruo thought of what to say: "It's not all my mother's fault. She's a woman, and it's not easy to take me with her. Later, she remarried. I didn't expect that man to look decent, but he was actually a... pervert."

Even though Jiang Ruo intentionally briefed and briefed this horrific experience, Xi Yufeng, as the audience, still felt a palpitation-like chill.

He couldn't imagine how a child who was in elementary school and had no strength to restrain his hands would refuse a hand extended to him by an adult man with evil intentions.

Speaking of this, Jiang Ruo took a deep breath and breathed it out after a long time, as if to give himself courage.

When he spoke again, his voice was less trembling, but still low and hoarse: "He tempted me with candy, tuition fees, and my mother's tears, and forced me to go to his room. Fortunately, fortunately, he was timid and afraid of making things worse, so he didn't Dare to make it to the end, at most... let me hold him between my legs, look at my face full of tears, and get all those dirty things on me."

Feeling a body sticking to his back, Jiang Ruo was hugged in his arms, but he didn't feel warm.

Xi Yufeng pressed against Jiang Ruo's neck, telling him to stop talking.

Jiang Ruo didn't intend to stop, and laughed, "Where are we going?"

Then, he talked about what happened next.

He was admitted to Fengcheng Dance Academy with No. 1 score, thinking that he could finally get rid of the shackles and fly freely.He worked hard at school and was always the first to the studio and the last to leave.He was also admitted by the dance troupe directly under Fengcheng Theater, and became a pillar in less than half a year. Every time he starred in a play, it was always hard to get a ticket.

He thought that he had finally come out of the nightmare, that everything was going in a good direction.

"Maybe fate should be like this." Regarding this, Jiang Ruo, like countless underappreciated people, played tricks on fate to downplay the gloomy past, "Peng Weibin, do you remember this person? He should have come out by now."

"He is the son of the old head of the dance troupe. He took good care of me when I first joined the dance troupe. In addition, he is a senior from the dance academy. I got to know him very quickly. Maybe it was because I lacked love. After a while I almost thought that he was kind to me... because he meant that to me."

The arms around his waist suddenly tightened, as if he had a premonition that the next development of the story was not something he could bear.

"Facts have proved that I was being self-indulgent." Jiang Ruo paused for a while before continuing, "Later, he began to introduce me to the so-called opportunities frequently, such as having dinner with the president today, having a drink with the dean tomorrow, every day. They are different big people, and the only thing that remains the same is the entertainment show, which will always be the "No Name" that I edited myself."

"I didn't want to dance, so he begged me with the rise and fall of the dance troupe, and analyzed the pros and cons for me. My heart softened, and if I softened again and again, he got worse. Once...he put unclean drugs in the wine I drank. , It may be similar to the one your brother gave you. When I regained consciousness, I was already lying on the bed in the hotel, and someone was taking a shower in the bathroom. I don’t know which association’s president it is, or the owner of the dance troupe who intends to invest. ..."

"Stop talking." Xi Yufeng said again, "Jiang Ruo, stop talking."

Jiang Ruo still smiled, even though the smile was pale as paper: "I escaped by chance that time, and the price I paid was to be expelled from the dance troupe. You probably know what happened afterwards. Peng Weibin, the villain, first sued and spread everywhere that I climbed the bed for the sake of superiority In order to force me to submit, he put drugs under the pillow in my dormitory... When the police took me away, I was already ruined at school. I don’t even want to answer the phone.”

"The next thing is the black material video. I earn my living expenses by myself. Without the stage, it means that I have no source of income. After finally finding a job in the film and television city, Peng Weibin even came to make trouble, telling the people around me who I am. A bitch who crawls on every bed, trying to repeat the same tricks to ruin my reputation... I was too afraid of losing my job, so I beat him in a fit of anger. As a result, he went to the hospital, and I was criminally detained. The dismissal notice is completely gone."

The sound of the rain outside gradually subsided, Jiang Ruo opened his eyes, looked at the water droplets remaining on the glass, and then looked through them at the sporadic lights in the distance.

"Later, I met you."

If Jiang Ruo could hear Xi Yufeng's slightly heavy breathing, he could also feel how hard the arms were encircling him.

"Every minute and every second with you is like a dream. You hug me, kiss me, say you miss me, care about even the slightest injury I suffer, give me gifts, and let me sleep on a soft bed ...give me a place that feels like home."

Having said that, Jiang Ruo choked up, his vision became blurred again, and he couldn't see anything clearly.

It's so strange, the wound was torn open layer by layer just now, it hurt so much, he couldn't hold back his tears.

He heard Xi Yufeng say: "This is your home."

Jiang Ruo shook her head: "No, this is not my home, it's another cage, where you kept me in captivity."

"From the beginning to the end, you put yourself in the position of the patron and treated me as a plaything... It's not wrong to do so. You pay me to sleep with you, and each takes the relationship you need. So it's my fault, the fault I was sincerely moved by you, but my fault was that I was overconfident and had the despicable thought of wanting to monopolize you."

"no……"

Jiang Ruo didn't give Xi Yufeng a chance, and insisted on finishing the sentence: "You always ask me what I want, but I want it, but you can't give it. What's the difference between you treating me like that and those people who trampled on me at will? The difference? I finally got rid of those gossips, and you want to pull me back to continue to bear it, what is the difference between you and them?"

Sucking his nose, the tears became more turbulent.

A hand came around behind him, the originally dry palm was pressed against Jiang Ruo's eyelids, and the wet eyelashes poked in the palm, it was already hard to tell who was trembling.

In the end, Jiang Ruo still raised his hand, grabbed Xi Yufeng's wrist, and tried to pull to separate the last point of connection.

"Now, it's time to wake up from the dream." He called his name for the last time, "Xi Yufeng, let go."

"Don't make me hate you."

When it was almost dawn, Xi Yufeng lying on the bed closed his eyes and heard some voices.

Someone got off the bed, without shoes, and stepped on the floor with bare feet, light as a dance step.

Then there was the sound of rustling clothes, and there was a soft click in the middle, and the sound of some kind of metal chain being unbuckled and falling to the ground.

Let Xi Yufeng close his eyes even more tightly, afraid of seeing something, but also unable to control himself, wanting to change his mind.

As the heavy double doors closed behind him, Jiang Ruo took a breath of outside air and pressed the elevator to go downstairs.

There was a whole mirror in the elevator car. Jiang Ruo looked at himself in the mirror who looked like a fugitive, with broken lips, wounds on his neck, and glaring red marks on his wrists.

But they will disappear eventually, just like the chain once worn on his ankle, the moment it hits the ground, it is the end of delusion and the beginning of freedom.

On a sunny morning after the rain, Jiang Ruo stood on the side of the road full of traffic and looked up at the sky.

An ordinary day, no different from yesterday, although the sky seems not as blue as yesterday, but there is the sun.

I can stand upright under the sun——Jiang Ruo told himself that with his eyes wide open.

Even if the ankle is empty and unaccustomed, the heart seems to be empty, and something important has been lost.