cat writing love poems

Lu Ziyan returned to the team base on the second night, and was packing his things in the afternoon.

He didn't have many things, and he didn't come back from the Spring Festival holiday for a long time. He brought back very little luggage, and there was only one small suitcase when he packed it up.

Luo Jia wanted to see him off before he left, because her winter vacation was still very long, and she would not be able to return to Jiangcheng for more than 20 days, and it would be a long, long time before we meet again.

Because the parents didn't say anything when they went out the first few times, Luo Jia gradually became more courageous.

But this time, it was probably because she ran out every three days that caught her mother's attention. When she was changing her shoes, her mother asked, "You often run out these days, where do you go?"

The timidity that had been gradually relaxed, the moment he heard these words, the panic that was almost carved into his bones since he was a child surged up.

She was instinctively nervous, like being asked countless times why her grade was one lower than last time, why she made two more mistakes in homework today, and why she came home 5 minutes later than usual.

Her hands were tying her shoes stiffly, and she dared not speak a word.

"With high school classmates?"

Seeing that she was silent, mother continued to ask.

"……Um."

"Don't lie to mom."

With just four short words, Luo Jia felt his blood being pumped into cold air, and his whole body became extremely tense because of instinct.

The shoes were already tied, but she didn't dare to go out, she just stood at the entrance like this, as if waiting for the judgment hanging above her head.

Seeing that she was silent, her mother said further: "Mom knows you well. You didn't have any friends in high school. Where did you find a friend now, and you play with them every two days?"

...have no friends.

Hearing this, Luo Jia felt a certain thorn in his heart trembling, and the pain in his heart became more and more dense, and he couldn't ignore it.

"You don't like to talk, you are introverted, and you are afraid of doing anything. There are only a few classmates who can talk to you. Are you hanging out with them?"

"..."

After a long time, Luo Jia numbly let go of her palm from the dense pain.

The palm of the hand has been pinched with a few crescent marks by his nails.

Her tone was still calm, as if nothing had happened, and she was obedient as always: "I really don't have any friends, but I could have friends in the first place. I didn't have friends before... It doesn't mean I don't have them now."

After a pause, she didn't know whether she wanted to convince her mother or comfort herself, she added stubbornly, "I have friends now."

She stood at the door and didn't go out.

Dad came out of the back room with tea, and when he heard the conversation between the two, he turned to persuade his mother, "Jiajia is an adult now, so leave her alone."

It's good that Dad didn't talk, but when he spoke, Mom suddenly lost her temper: "I also want to leave her alone, if she is a little girl who doesn't know people well, and makes some dubious friends, she won't hurt herself! "

"...Mom, I've known him for a long time, and he's not a man of ambiguity." She seldom disobeyed, and she seldom even gave such explanations, because once she explained, her mother would be even more angry. Over time, she learned silence.

In my mother's view, explaining is a kind of sophistry, equal to disobedience.

Sure enough, after hearing her explanation, my mother immediately became more anxious: "Aren't there so many acquaintances committing crimes in the news? Relatives may harm you. Do you know what kind of person the other party is? Do you know what the other party is doing in private?" ."

Seeing her mother's tone getting more and more anxious, Dad quickly interjected to persuade him: "Jiajia has to get in touch with herself to know whether she will suffer or not. We just need to pay attention. We can't let Jiajia live in a greenhouse for the rest of his life. Can’t grow up, didn’t we agree that when Jiajia becomes an adult, she will face it by herself, don’t worry about it too much, come, I’ll cut an orange for you.”

After finishing speaking, he quickly gave Luo Jia a wink, signaling her to go out and play without worry: "Jia Jia, you should go to play, you still have to come back to eat at night, it gets dark early in winter, and it's still not safe to go outside at night. Call Dad when it happens."

"Yeah." Luo Jia glanced at her mother who remained silent after being persuaded by her father, and said meekly, "I'll be back before dinner."

Luo Jia closed the door, and in the quiet corridor, it was as if a person who was about to suffocate was breathing heavily after escaping.

She took out her mobile phone and looked at Lu Ziyan on WeChat.

The nerves that had been tense just now gradually relaxed, and the dense pain in the chest seemed to have not dissipated, and the original mood was washed away.

After the Spring Festival, the climate is already warming up.

Walking on the road is not as cold and windy as before. Today is a rare sunny day. The old alley is full of gold, bright like a bright future, but she doesn't pay attention to it.

When we arrived at the Internet cafe, Lu Fang was at the door as usual.

Seeing Luo Jia coming in, he greeted out of habit: "Yo, sister-in-law came just in time, I happened to be cutting fruit here."

Luo Jia shook her head, her voice was very low, "No, thank you."

She shook her head and walked directly towards the stairs.

Lu Fang wondered alone, the tone was wrong.

Although Luo Jia used to speak in a soft voice, she could still enunciate clearly, and she was very comfortable listening to being polite and polite, but today it sounded like she was weak.

Remembering that Lu Ziyan was not in the room at the moment, he quickly called Lu Ziyan.

When the phone was connected, Lu Ziyan asked directly, "Is she here?"

"We're here, we're all upstairs. I didn't say it, brother. I don't think she sounds very happy. You can ask later."

Luo Jia knocked on the door, but no one opened.

After waiting for a while, she knocked again, but still no answer.

At this moment, she suddenly became dazed, not knowing what to do, like walking in the desert with a heavy load, her steps were filled with gravel, looking for an oasis for a long time, but only saw a dry stream.

She didn't call Lu Ziyan either, and sat down on the stairs.

It was very quiet in the stairs, and the heavy curtains covered most of the bustle in the Internet cafe, leaving only the vague hilarity of another world.

I don't know how long I sat like this.

It seems that it didn't take long.

A corner of the door curtain under the steps was lifted by someone, and the hustle and bustle outside flooded in for a moment, and then as the door curtain was lowered, it returned to the vague silence.

Then someone slowly walked towards him, and when he reached in front of him, his footsteps stopped.

Lu Ziyan squatted down slowly in front of her, one step lower, just at eye level with her.

He lowered his head slightly to look at her depressed eyes with his head down.

The four eyes met, and his dark eyes were a little gentle, "You can tell me."

Luo Jia raised her head slightly, and saw his close eyelashes, like beautiful crow feathers.

The eyes are silent black, like a universe that cannot be seen through at a glance.

But the meaning of the existence of the universe is that there is a place for everything in the world. It is a tree hole where you don't have to worry about being ridiculed by anyone. All the secrets can be hidden in it.

"..."

She avoided his eyes and lowered her head sullenly.

Lu Ziyan was quietly in front of her, only waiting gently.

After a long time, she finally said in a low voice, "Actually, it's not that I don't have friends... I used to have good friends."

"I used to be... less introverted."

"When I was in kindergarten, my classmates liked me very much. I was very popular in the class. When I graduated, everyone rushed to take pictures with me. In elementary school, I was not shy and timid. I got good grades and represented the grade as an outstanding student. I spoke at the freshman meeting. I also won the painting competition award, was selected by the teacher to represent the school in the calligraphy competition held in the city, and my homework was selected as an excellent homework.”

"I used to be in school, no matter where I went, people knew me, gave me snacks, brought me fruits from home, bought beautiful erasers, because I praised them, I insisted on giving them away Give me."

"I also have a good friend who invited me to her home to do homework on weekends, and her mother took us to the playground on weekends."

"The school organized a trip and signed up voluntarily. The teacher led the team to the next city for three days."

"However, when I told my mother that I won the award, my mother would only say that this is what I should do. There was no pride or joy. It was so plain that I didn't know whether I should share it with her next time."

"I happily said that the snacks someone gave me at school today were delicious. My mother warned me not to pick up other people's snacks in the future. Those things are not healthy."

"I couldn't go to my classmate's house to play, because that classmate's grades were not good, and my mother told me not to associate with people with poor grades."

"I have never participated in the activities organized by the school. She feels unsafe and prone to accidents."

"I used to feel very troubled. I told my aunt who loved me very much all the time. I thought my mother was too strict with me. I wanted to go out with my friends, but my mother didn't allow it."

"My aunt said, I am a white-eyed wolf. That was the first time I saw my aunt angry. She accused me angrily. My mother didn't cheat on me, didn't abuse me, and she was strict with me for my own good. She wanted to harm me, but I actually felt dissatisfied, raising a white-eyed wolf like me is a lifetime of misfortune for my mother."

Luo Jia will always remember that day.

Because my aunt is always smiling, and she is called Jiajia very affectionately every time. My mother has never smiled at her, nor said words of encouragement to her. Her excellence and achievements will only be won by her mother. made.

But my aunt is different. My aunt will praise her for her good handwriting and her improvement in grades. When she fails in the exam, she will encourage her to improve next time.

Apart from her mother, her favorite is her aunt.

Therefore, when I have troubles, I want to talk to my aunt.

Because she has no friends, her father has never disobeyed her mother. At most, she will take her to buy snacks when she is scolded and crying. There is no one to talk to about all her confusion and troubles since she was a child.

But that day was the first time she plucked up the courage to talk about her troubles and confusion, but it made her aunt furious.

The words she said pierced Luo Jia's heart like knives one after another, so in the ten years of her life since that day, she has been reflecting every day whether she shouldn't have those troubles.

That sentence was like a burning brand, lingering in her heart all the time, she couldn't complain to her mother, otherwise she would be a white-eyed wolf.

Luo Jia buried her head even lower, like a failed ostrich, not wanting anyone in the world to see her cowardice and embarrassment.

Including... Lu Ziyan.

When she spoke again, she heard her voice choked up, "But I don't think I am. I love my mother very much, because I love her very much, so, so I don't want to see her disappointed at all, she won't let me be with her. I listen to my classmates with poor grades. She keeps my grades in the top ten of the grade, and I also listen to her. I don’t dare to distract myself for a moment. angry."

Her crying became more and more dull, and she covered her face, "But no matter how well I do, my mother never praises me, and she seldom has patience with me, and never listens to me seriously. I feel like I'm cranky and asking for trouble. I really, really just want her to be a little more gentle to me. I really don't blame her. I'm really just too lonely. I don't want to be like this, and Introverted and cowardly, I am not afraid to do anything, I...but no one listens to me, and I want friends."

She spoke incoherently, and in the end she only thought about the incoherent white-eyed wolf.

Those three words are like tattoos, as long as she sees her mother angry, there will be countless voices in her heart telling her, you are a white-eyed wolf, your mother made you eat and drink and grow up safely, and you are still alive. There is nothing to complain about, you are a white-eyed wolf.

In the hell where these three words are stacked, she is like a bound zombie, every step she moves is a chain.She didn't dare to cry, and she didn't dare to speak loudly. Any disobedience that would make her mother frown would nail her to the pillar of shame.

"Jiajia."

Lu Ziyan softly called her name.

Looking at her trembling shoulders, she is actually very thin. Even wearing a heavy winter padded jacket, she still looks very thin.

He put his palm on the top of her head and rubbed her head lightly, "I understand. You are not a white-eyed wolf. Your mother loves you very much, and you love her very much, but she didn't understand you."

Luo Jia calmed down a little because of his affirmation, but still kept silent and didn't look up.

"Find time to have a good talk with your mother, just like what you just said to me, and tell her all these words." His tone was gentle and encouraging.

Luo Jia subconsciously shook her head, "Mom won't listen."

She explained, "I tried to talk to her many times before, but she always interrupted me, saying that I was thinking nonsense and being ignorant."

"You were a child before, but now you are an adult."

What he said made Luo Jia startled for a moment.

Lu Ziyan continued: "Now you are an adult who can take responsibility just like your mother. Let's have a good communication with your mother as an adult."

"..."

This time she didn't refute.

But he didn't agree.

Her palms were clenched weakly, her eyes were still wet and swollen, and she couldn't find a fulcrum.

Then, she felt her hand being gently pulled over.

She raised her head slightly in a daze, and saw Lu Ziyan spread out her tightly clenched palms little by little. Sensing her gaze, Lu Ziyan raised his eyelashes and gave her a gentle smile, and then gently held the hand she had just loosened. hand.

"Don't be afraid."

The hand holding her squeezed her stiff fingertips very lightly. The temperature from his palm was dry and warm. He looked into her eyes and gently encouraged her again, "Don't be afraid, try Be an adult."

Seeing that her tears had stopped and her emotions had calmed down, Lu Ziyan smiled slightly and said, "You have to learn to take care of yourself, you can't ask your mother if you can buy some snacks when your child wants to eat snacks in the future. "

He suddenly teased, Luo Jia said slowly: "I don't even have a boyfriend now, where can I get a child?"

"do not have it."

"Ah."

"Then, does Jiajia want to fall in love?"

She was crying chaotically just now, and now she is still dull, slowly reflecting what Lu Ziyan said.

She shrank her hands nervously subconsciously, but found that her fingertips were still held by him, warm and reassuring.

He squatted halfway in front of her, so tall and at eye level with her, he could see his eyes very close, they were silent black.

But he looked at him with gentle eyes, still the same as before, with soft eyebrows and cold eyes.

Looking at each other so closely, she saw her own reflection in his eyes.

Luo Jia answered in confusion: "Is this something I can talk about if I want to?"

Hearing this, he lowered his eyelashes and smiled, and then asked: "So, does Jiajia have someone she likes?"

"Don't talk nonsense."

The question just now was still hesitating and nervous, and when she asked this question, she subconsciously refuted it.

Then subconsciously wanted to withdraw his hand, but was greedy for his palm, paused, and did not withdraw his hand.

He took a look: "Really?"

Feeling guilty, Luo Jia slightly avoided his eyes.

It was very soft, so weak that it couldn't hide his violent heartbeat, "...Yes, right."