Did the Demon King hug the hero's thigh today?
Chapter 1 1 Write as a devil, read as a vegetable chicken
It is strongly recommended that everyone who is desperate for life, come to G City before committing suicide, and squeeze the subway line 3 during the morning rush hour.
Yu Guo, who was floating in the air, said with true emotion——
Look at this car, the chin is on the top of the head, the elbow is on the back of the head, and the golden rooster can stand alone with one hand without forgetting to play the vibrato; The magical skill of shrinking bones is superb, 1 meters before getting on the car, and 7 meters after getting on the car... Every move and every move is to let the sky know that I will not admit defeat.
As long as you are an individual, you have to sigh after getting out of the car: It's great to be alive!
Yu Guo sighed halfway and suddenly shut up, almost forgetting that he is not alone now.He died just a few minutes ago, and to round it up was squeezed to death.
Seeing his body being carried out of the car, and after floating in the air for a few minutes, Yu Guo suddenly saw darkness.
"It's a pity that I managed to save up 20 game accounts that I haven't had time to draw yet..."
This is Yu Guo's last rant before she cools down.
*————
Yu Guo woke up with a howl from an excited voice.
The voice was sharp and loud, and the speed was super fast. Although he couldn't hear a word of what he said, it still made his ears buzz.
Yu Guo opened his eyes angrily, but instead of finding the person who spoke, he saw a piece of parchment.
On the crumpled parchment, it was written in beautiful cursive script:
[to do today:
1. Please confirm whether the princess continues to be locked up and hungry
2. Please confirm whether to respond to the ignorant provocation of the human race
3. Please issue a certificate of honor for the Dark Cooking King champion]
The moment he finished reading the last line, a row of small characters appeared on the parchment [No reply yet].
At that moment, the former social animal recalled the fear of being dominated by Dingding.Yu Guo picked up the quill pen and wrote "Received, follow up!" without even thinking about it. Then he threw the pen away and let out a long sigh of relief...
Wait, the plot doesn't seem right.
If I remember correctly, he is already a dead man, right?Dead people still have to-dos? ?Is it possible that you have to check in and sign in to do a task for reincarnation? ? ?
Before he could figure it out, an enthusiastic mechanical voice suddenly sounded in his mind.
[kiss!Hello!Looking forward to the stars and looking forward to the moon can be regarded as looking forward to death for you!I am your exclusive system number 12306!It's a pleasure to bond with you!As the first bundled benefits, you have been presented with one-click cremation and posthumous photo finishing services, and you are now buried in peace! 】
...Yu Guo had already said "greetings to the whole family" in her throat, when she suddenly felt a slight scratch on her left shoulder.
【Kiss, I'm here, I'm here! 】
As soon as he turned his head, he greeted a palm-sized skeleton villain who was enthusiastically writhing 206 bones in his body.
The moment their eyes met, the little guy smiled at him with his alveolar bones open.
Yu Guo: [Shock my mom.jpg]
The little skeleton man opened his mouth, and a mechanical voice full of vitality sounded in Yu Guo's mind again, 【Dear, welcome to the fantasy world of sword and magic! 】
As a former game developer and serious game geek, the words "Sword and Magic" seem to have pressed a certain switch.Yu Guo quickly accepted the fact that he was squeezed into time travel, recalled the web articles he had read, and asked familiarly: "What is my mission?"
[Your task is very simple - just stay alive! 】
Why?Yu Guo was taken aback.
Let me ask, in a different world of swords and magic, a mysterious traveler who came to Huaxia Kingdom, the task is not to kill the dragon to rescue the princess, not to defeat the devil to liberate the world, nor to end the war and spread love and peace, but to live? ?
What a world this must be!
The sixth sense of the experienced player told Yu Guo that "living" must not be as simple as he thought!
"How do I survive? Is it to fight monsters and upgrade skills? Or to collect equipment to gain favor?"
[No need!Kiss, you are at the full level now, and you are still the strongest in the world! 】
Full level at the beginning, the strongest in the world!Yu Guo swelled up. Unexpectedly, he had a black face all his life, and after his death, he finally managed to smuggle out of Africa and enter Europe, and even got an Aotian script!
He asked excitedly, "Who am I?"
[Oh, I forgot to tell you, you are the devil king!It is the most powerful master of darkness in the legend, absolute fear, invincible king, Hugo Wangzaiski, referred to as the devil Hugo. 】
Yu Guo suddenly felt a little cold on his back.Holding the last sliver of luck, he asked, "Could I have transmigrated into the game world?"
【Completely correct!Kiss you know so soon?As expected of the man chosen as the Demon Lord! 】
Yu Guo covered her face in despair.
He knows it!Lord of Darkness·Absolute Fear·Invincible King·Hugo·Wangzaiski, he wouldn't believe that this name was a coincidence even if it was a cobbled together name.Not only does he know that this is a game world, he also knows that the game is called "Frenzy Brave"!
"Frenzy Brave", with fatal bugs everywhere, ppt-like fighting experience, and a plot so broken that even 502 glue can't stick it together, once it was launched, it topped the list of game complaints and ghost animal areas on a certain website, and it likes to mention "the one in the garbage" Fighter" title.
To be fair, a game so bad that it didn’t sink silently among a bunch of brave and devil games, but stood out and attracted a lot of players to shake their hands, scolding and kryptonizing money. Behind this is the distortion of human nature. Or moral decay?
The real reason is so simple that it is outrageous, all because of the protagonist of the game——
The brave who is supposed to represent light and justice has a very irritable personality, and he can do it without beeping; in addition, there is no fetters of bloody plots that forcefully spread love and peace. , in the face of monsters, he made a sharp attack and made up the knife in time...
In short, compared to the devil who honestly stayed in the devil's city waiting to be hanged and beaten, and the brave man who destroyed the city and demolished houses and flattened half the continent, he was more like a big villain. This kind of sour setting was realized at the time. It is a clear stream in the world of braves.
However, because there were too many flaws, and the producer was too cheeky and unintentionally shameless charging model, "Rage Brave" finally ended unfinished amidst a lot of curses, and the whole team disbanded .
The main programmer of the game was deeply hit by the overwhelming "write bugs with your heart, write the game with your feet" and "buy bugs and get the game free". He once saw the code compilation interface and felt sick. He switched careers and became a food anchor, completely ending his game development career.
Don't ask why Yu Guo knows so well, just ask - he is the unlucky main programmer of the game!
It's not good to travel anywhere, but I chose to travel to an unfinished game that I personally wrote a lot of bugs;
The devil king was trampled on the ground repeatedly by that perverted brave man, and he was beaten and tortured in various ways... At the beginning, he made 12 versions of the devil king's death method alone! !
As if to prove that everything in front of him was not an illusion, a low magnetic male voice suddenly came from next to his ear.
"Master Demon King, have you confirmed today's to-do list?"
The man who looked like a butler bowed to him, then slowly raised his head, revealing blue and yellow pupils.
Ahhh!Yu Guo expressionlessly let out a groundhog scream from the bottom of his heart.
He recognized those eyes!
The person in front of him is none other than Sebastian, the number one demon king of the Demon King's Castle and the head chief!As a little boss whose combat power is second only to the Demon King, his demonized form is a soft little black cat! !When he debugged the second form code of the small boss for the first time, he thought he had used the wrong cut picture!
"My lord, is the princess still locked up and hungry today?" Seeing that Yu Guo didn't answer, Sebastian repeated it again.
"Princess?" Yu Guo was taken aback for a moment.
"It's the one that the evil dragon Nimeng Hogg snatched back from the Sevin Eleven Empire."
giao!Yu Guo silently rolled her eyes!
He knew that there must be something tricky for Fei Chief to get Long Aotian's script!It turned out to be waiting for him here!
In all the stories about the brave and the devil, the devil's death starts with stealing a beautiful princess!
And the brave man who loves the princess, in order to get back his sweetheart, drew the sword of the brave and embarked on a journey to defeat the devil.He went through many hardships and kept fighting monsters and upgrading, and finally, relying on the powerful aura of the protagonist, he raised the sword of the brave and gave the demon king to KO! ! !
"Rage Brave" is of course no exception!
The dangerous idea of robbing the princess should be strangled in the cradle, okay? !
Is it still too late for this princess to refuse to accept and return the product?
"How long has the princess been here?"
"Two days."
Yu Guo immediately breathed a sigh of relief. Fortunately, there are only two days. It seems that the story line has just begun!
Eh, at this point in time, the brave should still be playing in the mud in Novice Village, right?
Yu Guo was holding the parchment in his hand, and the corners of his mouth suddenly raised wildly uncontrollably.
In this case, why not go directly to Xinshou Village and destroy the brave man once and for all!hey hey~
I saw the demon king jumping up against the case and angrily scolded: "Humans dare to come here to provoke, they must pay the price! Anyone who offends my demon clan will be punished no matter how far away!... (500 words omitted here)"
"As expected of a ruthless Lord Demon King," Sebas's eyes lit up, "This subordinate will sort out the speech just now, and ask the demons in the city to recite it and write it silently!"
Yu Guo nodded in satisfaction, he just had a delicious meal, and now his mouth was so thirsty, he grabbed the cup that Sebastian had just put on the table, and drank it down in one gulp.
In an instant, the whole world was quiet.
Q: When Fengyoujing meets Piyanping, what kind of sparks will they collide with?
Answer: Thank you for your invitation.It will produce an unprecedented taste experience - like a sweat-soaked straw mat, salty with sourness, sourness with fishy sweetness, as if the stomach has done a set of Thomas twists and turns for three and a half weeks...
The above answer comes from Yu Guo, the demon king who vomited his soul out of his body in the corner.
【Ahhh#¥%*#! *&! ! ] The extremely sharp mechanical voice of No. 12306 sounded again in his mind because he was speaking too fast and couldn't understand what he was saying.
"Hey, little system, calm down, you will only make me dizzy and tinnitus... I can't understand what you are saying."
There was a dead silence in my mind.
After a while, the number 12306 went online again.
[Dear, I have something to tell you, I suggest you hold the handrails and be mentally prepared. 】
"Say~ I'm much calmer than you." Yu Guo propped up her body that was swollen from vomiting and comforted her.
【Kiss, you just vomited all the magic power of the devil after taking the food "milk tea". Because you vomited too hard, you also vomited out the magic core of the devil's full level. The magic core cannot be recycled after being separated from the body. Therefore, your level has fluctuated greatly at present...]
"(⊙o⊙)?"
[So, dear, your current level is Lv.0. 】
"w(?Д?)w!!!"
[Kiss, it has been detected that your san value is dropping rapidly!Please remain emotionally stable. 】
"Stable P! There are bugs in your world! I want to complain!!" Yu Guo was furious.
[Dear, I'm sorry that I can't accept your complaint for the time being.You see that other people also drank milk tea, not only did not have the same symptoms as you, but their experience points were +1. 】
As if to confirm what 12306 said, Sebastian rushed over and held Yu Guo's hand, "Master Demon King! What's the matter with you? Is it a milk tea problem?!" down.
"You", Yu Guo stared at the person in front of him for a long time, and couldn't help asking, "Don't you feel uncomfortable?"
"No." Sebastian smacked his lips seriously, "It tastes good, sweet and sour."
"==!!!"
[Dear, I searched the database, and there was a similar complaint before, and the official reply from the game was: "The player did not operate properly, not a system bug"! ] In order to prove that he is an honest and reliable internship system, No. 12306 added another sentence [that user's game ID is: Laozi will uninstall today].
The moment Yu Guo heard the ID, Yu Guo remembered it.
There is indeed such a bug: using prop milk tea can increase the experience value by 1, but when the character is at the full level, the experience has reached the maximum value, and continuing to increase the experience will cause data overflow-the experience level will return to zero.
He still clearly remembered his reply: the trigger probability of this bug is low, and he explained it to the outside world as the player's improper operation, and he will change it later when he has time.
Who would have imagined that the game would be cold before the bug was fixed.
If time can be turned back, Yu Guo will definitely fix this bug with her hands!Can this kind of thing wait? !It's going to die, okay? !
It's a pity no.
Lord Demon King's mood at the moment is regret, very regret! !
"Master Demon King," Sebastian looked at Yu Guo worriedly, "Why don't you take a break first, and we'll discuss punishing ignorant humans later?"
Yu Guo rubbed his forehead, he really wanted to read a file right now, and go back and shut his fragrant mouth!
Up to now, there is only one road left in front of him!
Lord Demon King took a deep breath, slowly raised his head, and asked, "Where is the princess locked up? I'll send her back personally!"
Yu Guo, who was floating in the air, said with true emotion——
Look at this car, the chin is on the top of the head, the elbow is on the back of the head, and the golden rooster can stand alone with one hand without forgetting to play the vibrato; The magical skill of shrinking bones is superb, 1 meters before getting on the car, and 7 meters after getting on the car... Every move and every move is to let the sky know that I will not admit defeat.
As long as you are an individual, you have to sigh after getting out of the car: It's great to be alive!
Yu Guo sighed halfway and suddenly shut up, almost forgetting that he is not alone now.He died just a few minutes ago, and to round it up was squeezed to death.
Seeing his body being carried out of the car, and after floating in the air for a few minutes, Yu Guo suddenly saw darkness.
"It's a pity that I managed to save up 20 game accounts that I haven't had time to draw yet..."
This is Yu Guo's last rant before she cools down.
*————
Yu Guo woke up with a howl from an excited voice.
The voice was sharp and loud, and the speed was super fast. Although he couldn't hear a word of what he said, it still made his ears buzz.
Yu Guo opened his eyes angrily, but instead of finding the person who spoke, he saw a piece of parchment.
On the crumpled parchment, it was written in beautiful cursive script:
[to do today:
1. Please confirm whether the princess continues to be locked up and hungry
2. Please confirm whether to respond to the ignorant provocation of the human race
3. Please issue a certificate of honor for the Dark Cooking King champion]
The moment he finished reading the last line, a row of small characters appeared on the parchment [No reply yet].
At that moment, the former social animal recalled the fear of being dominated by Dingding.Yu Guo picked up the quill pen and wrote "Received, follow up!" without even thinking about it. Then he threw the pen away and let out a long sigh of relief...
Wait, the plot doesn't seem right.
If I remember correctly, he is already a dead man, right?Dead people still have to-dos? ?Is it possible that you have to check in and sign in to do a task for reincarnation? ? ?
Before he could figure it out, an enthusiastic mechanical voice suddenly sounded in his mind.
[kiss!Hello!Looking forward to the stars and looking forward to the moon can be regarded as looking forward to death for you!I am your exclusive system number 12306!It's a pleasure to bond with you!As the first bundled benefits, you have been presented with one-click cremation and posthumous photo finishing services, and you are now buried in peace! 】
...Yu Guo had already said "greetings to the whole family" in her throat, when she suddenly felt a slight scratch on her left shoulder.
【Kiss, I'm here, I'm here! 】
As soon as he turned his head, he greeted a palm-sized skeleton villain who was enthusiastically writhing 206 bones in his body.
The moment their eyes met, the little guy smiled at him with his alveolar bones open.
Yu Guo: [Shock my mom.jpg]
The little skeleton man opened his mouth, and a mechanical voice full of vitality sounded in Yu Guo's mind again, 【Dear, welcome to the fantasy world of sword and magic! 】
As a former game developer and serious game geek, the words "Sword and Magic" seem to have pressed a certain switch.Yu Guo quickly accepted the fact that he was squeezed into time travel, recalled the web articles he had read, and asked familiarly: "What is my mission?"
[Your task is very simple - just stay alive! 】
Why?Yu Guo was taken aback.
Let me ask, in a different world of swords and magic, a mysterious traveler who came to Huaxia Kingdom, the task is not to kill the dragon to rescue the princess, not to defeat the devil to liberate the world, nor to end the war and spread love and peace, but to live? ?
What a world this must be!
The sixth sense of the experienced player told Yu Guo that "living" must not be as simple as he thought!
"How do I survive? Is it to fight monsters and upgrade skills? Or to collect equipment to gain favor?"
[No need!Kiss, you are at the full level now, and you are still the strongest in the world! 】
Full level at the beginning, the strongest in the world!Yu Guo swelled up. Unexpectedly, he had a black face all his life, and after his death, he finally managed to smuggle out of Africa and enter Europe, and even got an Aotian script!
He asked excitedly, "Who am I?"
[Oh, I forgot to tell you, you are the devil king!It is the most powerful master of darkness in the legend, absolute fear, invincible king, Hugo Wangzaiski, referred to as the devil Hugo. 】
Yu Guo suddenly felt a little cold on his back.Holding the last sliver of luck, he asked, "Could I have transmigrated into the game world?"
【Completely correct!Kiss you know so soon?As expected of the man chosen as the Demon Lord! 】
Yu Guo covered her face in despair.
He knows it!Lord of Darkness·Absolute Fear·Invincible King·Hugo·Wangzaiski, he wouldn't believe that this name was a coincidence even if it was a cobbled together name.Not only does he know that this is a game world, he also knows that the game is called "Frenzy Brave"!
"Frenzy Brave", with fatal bugs everywhere, ppt-like fighting experience, and a plot so broken that even 502 glue can't stick it together, once it was launched, it topped the list of game complaints and ghost animal areas on a certain website, and it likes to mention "the one in the garbage" Fighter" title.
To be fair, a game so bad that it didn’t sink silently among a bunch of brave and devil games, but stood out and attracted a lot of players to shake their hands, scolding and kryptonizing money. Behind this is the distortion of human nature. Or moral decay?
The real reason is so simple that it is outrageous, all because of the protagonist of the game——
The brave who is supposed to represent light and justice has a very irritable personality, and he can do it without beeping; in addition, there is no fetters of bloody plots that forcefully spread love and peace. , in the face of monsters, he made a sharp attack and made up the knife in time...
In short, compared to the devil who honestly stayed in the devil's city waiting to be hanged and beaten, and the brave man who destroyed the city and demolished houses and flattened half the continent, he was more like a big villain. This kind of sour setting was realized at the time. It is a clear stream in the world of braves.
However, because there were too many flaws, and the producer was too cheeky and unintentionally shameless charging model, "Rage Brave" finally ended unfinished amidst a lot of curses, and the whole team disbanded .
The main programmer of the game was deeply hit by the overwhelming "write bugs with your heart, write the game with your feet" and "buy bugs and get the game free". He once saw the code compilation interface and felt sick. He switched careers and became a food anchor, completely ending his game development career.
Don't ask why Yu Guo knows so well, just ask - he is the unlucky main programmer of the game!
It's not good to travel anywhere, but I chose to travel to an unfinished game that I personally wrote a lot of bugs;
The devil king was trampled on the ground repeatedly by that perverted brave man, and he was beaten and tortured in various ways... At the beginning, he made 12 versions of the devil king's death method alone! !
As if to prove that everything in front of him was not an illusion, a low magnetic male voice suddenly came from next to his ear.
"Master Demon King, have you confirmed today's to-do list?"
The man who looked like a butler bowed to him, then slowly raised his head, revealing blue and yellow pupils.
Ahhh!Yu Guo expressionlessly let out a groundhog scream from the bottom of his heart.
He recognized those eyes!
The person in front of him is none other than Sebastian, the number one demon king of the Demon King's Castle and the head chief!As a little boss whose combat power is second only to the Demon King, his demonized form is a soft little black cat! !When he debugged the second form code of the small boss for the first time, he thought he had used the wrong cut picture!
"My lord, is the princess still locked up and hungry today?" Seeing that Yu Guo didn't answer, Sebastian repeated it again.
"Princess?" Yu Guo was taken aback for a moment.
"It's the one that the evil dragon Nimeng Hogg snatched back from the Sevin Eleven Empire."
giao!Yu Guo silently rolled her eyes!
He knew that there must be something tricky for Fei Chief to get Long Aotian's script!It turned out to be waiting for him here!
In all the stories about the brave and the devil, the devil's death starts with stealing a beautiful princess!
And the brave man who loves the princess, in order to get back his sweetheart, drew the sword of the brave and embarked on a journey to defeat the devil.He went through many hardships and kept fighting monsters and upgrading, and finally, relying on the powerful aura of the protagonist, he raised the sword of the brave and gave the demon king to KO! ! !
"Rage Brave" is of course no exception!
The dangerous idea of robbing the princess should be strangled in the cradle, okay? !
Is it still too late for this princess to refuse to accept and return the product?
"How long has the princess been here?"
"Two days."
Yu Guo immediately breathed a sigh of relief. Fortunately, there are only two days. It seems that the story line has just begun!
Eh, at this point in time, the brave should still be playing in the mud in Novice Village, right?
Yu Guo was holding the parchment in his hand, and the corners of his mouth suddenly raised wildly uncontrollably.
In this case, why not go directly to Xinshou Village and destroy the brave man once and for all!hey hey~
I saw the demon king jumping up against the case and angrily scolded: "Humans dare to come here to provoke, they must pay the price! Anyone who offends my demon clan will be punished no matter how far away!... (500 words omitted here)"
"As expected of a ruthless Lord Demon King," Sebas's eyes lit up, "This subordinate will sort out the speech just now, and ask the demons in the city to recite it and write it silently!"
Yu Guo nodded in satisfaction, he just had a delicious meal, and now his mouth was so thirsty, he grabbed the cup that Sebastian had just put on the table, and drank it down in one gulp.
In an instant, the whole world was quiet.
Q: When Fengyoujing meets Piyanping, what kind of sparks will they collide with?
Answer: Thank you for your invitation.It will produce an unprecedented taste experience - like a sweat-soaked straw mat, salty with sourness, sourness with fishy sweetness, as if the stomach has done a set of Thomas twists and turns for three and a half weeks...
The above answer comes from Yu Guo, the demon king who vomited his soul out of his body in the corner.
【Ahhh#¥%*#! *&! ! ] The extremely sharp mechanical voice of No. 12306 sounded again in his mind because he was speaking too fast and couldn't understand what he was saying.
"Hey, little system, calm down, you will only make me dizzy and tinnitus... I can't understand what you are saying."
There was a dead silence in my mind.
After a while, the number 12306 went online again.
[Dear, I have something to tell you, I suggest you hold the handrails and be mentally prepared. 】
"Say~ I'm much calmer than you." Yu Guo propped up her body that was swollen from vomiting and comforted her.
【Kiss, you just vomited all the magic power of the devil after taking the food "milk tea". Because you vomited too hard, you also vomited out the magic core of the devil's full level. The magic core cannot be recycled after being separated from the body. Therefore, your level has fluctuated greatly at present...]
"(⊙o⊙)?"
[So, dear, your current level is Lv.0. 】
"w(?Д?)w!!!"
[Kiss, it has been detected that your san value is dropping rapidly!Please remain emotionally stable. 】
"Stable P! There are bugs in your world! I want to complain!!" Yu Guo was furious.
[Dear, I'm sorry that I can't accept your complaint for the time being.You see that other people also drank milk tea, not only did not have the same symptoms as you, but their experience points were +1. 】
As if to confirm what 12306 said, Sebastian rushed over and held Yu Guo's hand, "Master Demon King! What's the matter with you? Is it a milk tea problem?!" down.
"You", Yu Guo stared at the person in front of him for a long time, and couldn't help asking, "Don't you feel uncomfortable?"
"No." Sebastian smacked his lips seriously, "It tastes good, sweet and sour."
"==!!!"
[Dear, I searched the database, and there was a similar complaint before, and the official reply from the game was: "The player did not operate properly, not a system bug"! ] In order to prove that he is an honest and reliable internship system, No. 12306 added another sentence [that user's game ID is: Laozi will uninstall today].
The moment Yu Guo heard the ID, Yu Guo remembered it.
There is indeed such a bug: using prop milk tea can increase the experience value by 1, but when the character is at the full level, the experience has reached the maximum value, and continuing to increase the experience will cause data overflow-the experience level will return to zero.
He still clearly remembered his reply: the trigger probability of this bug is low, and he explained it to the outside world as the player's improper operation, and he will change it later when he has time.
Who would have imagined that the game would be cold before the bug was fixed.
If time can be turned back, Yu Guo will definitely fix this bug with her hands!Can this kind of thing wait? !It's going to die, okay? !
It's a pity no.
Lord Demon King's mood at the moment is regret, very regret! !
"Master Demon King," Sebastian looked at Yu Guo worriedly, "Why don't you take a break first, and we'll discuss punishing ignorant humans later?"
Yu Guo rubbed his forehead, he really wanted to read a file right now, and go back and shut his fragrant mouth!
Up to now, there is only one road left in front of him!
Lord Demon King took a deep breath, slowly raised his head, and asked, "Where is the princess locked up? I'll send her back personally!"
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