substitute actor

There was silence in the carriage, and a needle could be heard. Yan Ge remained silent, tilting his head silently, staring at the passing scenery outside the window, his wrist trembling, and his fingertips piercing his palm, causing a dull pain.

He understood why Jin Siyan was angry.

Jin Siyan had mentioned it to him so many times and offered to help him, but Yan Ge refused with such grandiose reasons.Until that night, Jin Siyan heard from him that he didn't want to disappoint his kindness, so he never forced him to do anything.

Yan Ge knew from the bottom of his heart that Jin Siyan was really good enough to him. Whether it was out of concern for his former classmates, or as Jin Siyan said, it was very relaxing to be with him, Yan Ge really felt it. Jin Siyan treats him differently from others.

In front of him, Jin Siyan let go of his pretentious airs. He was not Ansheng's young president, nor was he an untouchable person, but his friend.

Yan Ge has never expected more, and he is very satisfied if he can stop here.

But what happened today screwed everything up.

From Jin Siyan's point of view, he was afraid that he would get into someone else's bed as soon as he rejected his proposal.

Yan Ge doesn't mind how dirty and despicable he is in other people's mouths. It's not like he hasn't heard more exaggerated and less pleasant rumors.

But Yan Ge still felt very sad when Jin Siyan uttered such ironic words that implied pity from above.

There was no sound in the carriage, and Yan Ge's ears were humming intermittently, and there was a faint cramping in his heart, which made him unable to breathe.

After a long time, Yan Ge said softly, "I'm sorry."

Jin Siyan sneered, mercilessly, "I'm tired of listening."

I'm sorry these three words, Yan Ge has told him countless times, it seems that if something happens, this man knows how to bow his head and apologize, just like coaxing a child, he can be coaxed by just giving a candy lightly.

Jin Siyan didn't like Yan Ge's always resigned look, flat and indifferent, as if nothing could make him stir up trouble.I tried my best to show a little bit of kindness, but I couldn't cover up this indifferent and reserved man at all.

In the past, he liked Yan Ge the most, who didn't fight or grab, and when he listened to him, he was quiet and gentle. He didn't respond, but he knew that this man had been listening.

But now, hearing the man's apology again, Jin Siyan only felt annoyed.

He's a little bored.

I'm a little tired of Yan Ge's weak temper, and I don't even understand why I wanted to make friends with him in the first place.

Hearing what he said, Yan Ge was somewhat expected, but he didn't know what to say to make it up. After a long while, he could only choke out dry words, "I didn't mean to hurt your kindness..."

"I'm not angry." Jin Siyan interrupted him, his voice was calm, but there was obvious sullenness, he said he wasn't angry, but he didn't even look at him, "I just think that you play yin and yang very well."

Yan Ge didn't speak, and could only silently let him vent his inner resentment with sharp and harsh words.

He owed Jin Siyan a lot.

"Really, Yan Ge, your acting skills are really good. It's a pity not to win the next Best Actor." Jin Siyan became angrier as he spoke, and suddenly laughed, as if he had thought of something absurd.

"Yang Ge, do you know? You told me on the phone that you didn't want to disappoint my goodwill, and I really believed it. Really."

"I heard your voice, although I can't see the expression, but I can imagine it," Jin Siyan tilted his head while waiting for the red light, finally glanced at him, shook his head with a chuckle, "You must have acted better that day than now. "

"I still blamed myself a little at the time. I blamed myself for being too selfish. How could I keep forcing you to make choices and accept my suggestions." Jin Siyan paused for a long time, as if he was sorting out his emotions. When he spoke again, his voice returned to indifference "Now think about it, I used that time to buy a rib to feed the dog, and the dog knew to wag its tail at me."

Yan Ge twitched the corners of his mouth bitterly, he didn't even have the strength to pretend to smile, and his voice was weak, "I didn't know that was the reason they asked me to go, I just..."

"You really don't know?" Jin Siyan smiled, "Do you dare to say that you don't feel anything at all? Or are you a 15-year-old kid who doesn't understand anything?"

"I……"

"Yan Ge, what exactly do you want? Can't I help you? Do you have to go into this muddy water and sell your body?"

Yan Ge's pupils trembled, his chest was a little congested, and the feeling of retching surged in his stomach, "...Do you think I have the right to refuse if I want to?"

The anger in his heart suddenly rose, and Jin Siyan yelled directly, "If you can't refuse, you can fucking find me! Do you think I will let you be bullied for nothing?!"

"But these things are not up to you to decide, are you?!" Yan Ge's mind became hot, and he blurted out.

The voice was not loud, with a panting cry, Yan Ge didn't look up, afraid that he would see the mist in his eyes, and the hand hidden by his side was clenched tightly, shaking unbearably.

Suddenly, the carriage suddenly fell silent.

Jin Siyan was stunned for a moment, then slowly opened his eyes wide, his voice seemed to come out from between his teeth, "What did you say?"

"I met Mr. Jin today, and he told me about it." Yan Ge closed his eyes, and his heart sank, "I don't want you to beg for help for me."

He is well aware of how tense the relationship between Jin Siyan and Jin Zhian is, and he also knows that Jin Siyan's life in Ansheng is not satisfactory. If so, this man is always thinking about him, thinking about how to pull him out quagmire.

When Jin Zhian told him this, Yan Ge didn't understand it at all, he just wanted Yan Ge to give Jin Siyan a pillow, let Jin Siyan go beg him, and satisfy Jin Zhian's twisted and disgusting vanity.

Yan Ge couldn't, didn't dare, let alone let Jin Siyan do such humble things for him. He had experienced this feeling before, and he didn't want Jin Siyan to experience it too.

Saying that sentence with a bit of selfishness, Yan Ge's heart rate soared, but tears poured down because of the overly agitated emotions, and he couldn't stop it no matter what.

No one spoke for a while.

After a while, the car slowly stopped on the side of the road, and with a click, the safety lock was unlocked.

Jin Siyan's voice was full of exhaustion and suppressed impatience, and he said faintly, "Go down. This is not far from your hotel."

Yan Ge raised his head slowly, pursed his lips, looked at his livid face, and panicked for a moment, "You..."

"Get down quickly." Jin Siyan closed his eyes, and the hand holding the steering wheel was so hard that the veins were visible, as if he was suppressing some violent emotion, "Otherwise I will really fight with you."

Yan Ge didn't know where he said something wrong, but he felt that Jin Siyan was extremely furious now.

There was no cynicism or quarrel just now, it was quiet and silent, just like the turbulent waves brewing under the calm sea, which made Yan Ge feel flustered.

Get out of the car according to his intention, Yan Ge lowered his head and stood by the side of the road.

Jin Siyan didn't leave immediately, but stayed there for a while, and then laughed sarcastically.

"Yes, I am nothing. I can't decide anything in Ansheng. That idiot Jin Zhian has been whispering in my ears for 20 years." He raised his head, looked at the person standing outside the window, his tone did not fluctuate , but the voice was full of disappointment, "I'm just a waste, a rich second generation with no education and skills, is it okay?"

Yan Ge suddenly raised his head and looked at him in astonishment.

"Yan Ge." Jin Siyan called him with a cold voice, "It's just that I didn't expect that even you would say that." After a pause, "I'm really sad."

"I'm not……"

Before Yan Ge had time to speak, the window of the car went up involuntarily, and then, the car drove out quickly, leaving a cloud of dust.

Dazed for a few seconds with red eyes, the traces of tears dried up on his face, Yan Ge shuddered, suddenly reacted, fumbled for his phone in a panic, and called Jin Siyan with shaking hands.

Everything is off.

He didn't know if it was Jin Siyan who really turned off the phone or blocked him, he only knew that Jin Siyan was completely complete now and didn't want to talk to him anymore.

Standing on the side of the road, with the night wind blowing on his body, it was bitingly cold, Yan Ge looked at the traffic coming and going in the neon lights, his whole body was weak, helpless and desolate from inside to outside, as if life was changing bit by bit, Swallowed from the heart.

Walking along the street to the hotel, Yan Ge didn't give up and kept calling him.

Worried that Jin Siyan would drive fast when he was stuck in his heart, his heart was anxious and aching, his mind was full of gaps in the car windows, Jin Siyan had a lonely and disappointed face, and his heart was so congested that it hurt.

Dozens of phone calls, no reply, Yan Ge sighed and sent him a message.

Good thing he didn't delete him.

Yan Ge: [I didn't mean that, I never thought you were nothing. 】

The pale explanation made Yan Ge himself not believe it.

[You can send me a message when you arrive at the hotel, okay? 】

No echo.

Looking at the empty chat interface, Yan Ge took a deep breath and gritted his teeth.

【Sorry, I'm really worried about you. 】

[I just want to know if you are okay. 】

[Can I get back a message? 】

[Let's talk, shall we? 】

……

When the message was sent out, everything disappeared without a sound.

That night, Yan Ge provisionally booked a ticket for the next morning. Before dawn, he carried his suitcase and went to the station alone.

Without calling the assistant, I left the car to him and let him have fun here for a few days.

Before getting in the car, Yan Ge glanced at his phone, but there was still no reply.

During the one-hour drive, Yan Ge slept all the way. When he woke up, it was snowing in Qitang.

Thin, tiny fluff, falling on the ground, leaves, and shoulders.

Yan Ge had no time to appreciate it, so he lifted the suitcase and walked slowly to the side of the road.Stopping at the intersection and waiting for the red light, the cell phone that had been dead all the time suddenly vibrated, Yan Ge paused, his drooping eyelids suddenly opened, and hurriedly took out the cell phone.

Jin Siyan replied with a message, only a few words.

Jin Siyan: 【I don't think now is a good time for talking. 】

Staring blankly at the screen, after a while, another message came from the other side:

[I don't want to see you. 】

The wind in the depths of winter seemed to be particularly steep, and once it blew, my face felt a sharp pain.

Looking at those cold words, Yan Ge couldn't recover for a moment, and when he reacted, he hurriedly wiped his face, and felt the wetness in his palm, only to realize that he was crying uncontrollably again.

Yan Ge knew that he had completely messed up their relationship this time.