sanguine and depressive

Before leaving, Yu Mian raised his hand, pointed at me casually, and towards Wei Chengyu, his tone was the advice of an old friend, the motto of a buddy.

"Be careful, this person likes men, gay." He said, "I used to like his deskmate in junior high school, it's disgusting. Be careful that his next target is you."

His voice was not low, and the surrounding was very quiet. The few students in the front row who were about to go home all turned around.

After leaving that sentence, Yu Mian left.I don't know where the courage came from, I raised my head slightly, and met those strange eyes, among them was the one I was familiar with, which was Li Dan.

Li Dan, please don't look at me like that.

I begged in my heart, and after a few seconds she looked away.

I turned my head slightly and saw that Wei Chengyu was also looking at me.

This was a too acrimonious question. I couldn't answer it and felt ashamed. I had the idea of ​​jumping out of the window, but then I thought it was only the second floor.But the library is on the eighth floor, and there is a window, so it is easy to climb up. The last time I poked my head out, I could see the white stone bricks on the ground floor of the first floor, which was unobstructed.

My soul has left my body and embarked on the road of liberation, but my body is still in place, and even my eyes have been dried and dried there.Through my eyes, I saw that Wei Chengyu was still looking at me.

If I were a comedian, I should yell "surprise!" and laugh out loud.It's a pity that I am not, so I have to fool the audience with my poor acting skills.

I tried my best, and although I was embarrassed, I still showed a very short smile to Wei Chengyu.

Sorry, there are so many wonders in the world, it makes you laugh.

I pretended to be relaxed and turned my eyes back to the book.Strange thing, why suddenly I don't know a single word.I struggled to recognize the first word and the second word, and I couldn't understand the meaning of the string.

The punishment that should come has finally come. When I secretly hid this secret, I should have been prepared to be exposed, but it came too early and too suddenly.

I didn't harm people everywhere, so why would there be people knocking on my door looking for me?

The few people left in the classroom walked quickly after listening to the gossip. After all, they couldn't find a microphone to find a searchlight, put me in my pocket for an interview, and couldn't actually set me on fire or soak my pig cage.what a pity.

In the end, there were only the students on duty and us.

Or run now, I thought, pretending to go to the toilet.It should only take two to three minutes to climb up the eighth floor, and it should only take a few seconds to fall from the eighth floor. My life can come to an abrupt end at the most embarrassing moment.The only thing I'm sorry about is my parents, I'm not promising, I'm introverted and cowardly, my grades are average... I'm worthless.Do you love me?Alas, in fact, it may not be very love.

I carefully closed Wei Chengyu's language documents, arranged them together with other books and put them in his desk.Fortunately, only the name of this book was written, so it wouldn't be too much trouble for him to change it.

The sky is falling apart, but it is actually calm.It's like a dream, but it's so real.

I stood up slowly with my bag on my back and walked out of the front door of the class. Footsteps came from behind, and Wei Chengyu followed.Aren't you going to host? Why follow me.I walked ahead very anxiously, and he followed me closely, so I gave up my escape plan.

The weather is really nice today, the sun is at its peak, and there are still people playing basketball on the playground.The two of us left the school one after the other, and walked together on Xichuan Middle Road, so I had enough time to plan.

I was calmed down by the autumn wind. If I really can’t do it, I should transfer to another school. My father will definitely help me solve it. I can just transfer to Shenzhen to study.Alas, why do people have to read books.

I stopped and turned back.I need to lie again, even though it's not my intention.

"Don't worry...Although I'm gay, I don't mean that to you," the throat was dry, but the eyes were moist, like rainwater going where it shouldn't go, "I never... liked you. But If you mind, I guarantee that within three days... it will disappear before your eyes."

I smiled at him, but the voice betrayed me, it vibrated uncontrollably.I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't hide it on purpose."

In fact, it was intentional, but I am obsessed with wanting many friends occasionally. The most important thing is that I like you very much and want to be by your side. I'm sorry.

Wei Chengyu grabbed my arm: "No, no."

I looked at him, and he seemed to be fed Bibi's strange flavored beans, with a hesitant expression on his face: "You...I..."

I feel embarrassed and embarrassed, like the rain is finally flooding.

"Hey... hey..." He said, and then wiped my tears with the sleeve of his white shirt, "I'm really... I'm stupid, what should I say. Why are you apologizing? If you like boys, you like them." Oh. I really don't know..."

"Don't you feel sick?" I asked.Yu Mianhui pointed at me and said it was disgusting, and I still remember everyone's expressions and demeanor when they saw Yan Baoting's photo, and I even remembered every word Wei Chengyu said clearly.

But now he retorted without thinking: "What's disgusting? You didn't do anything, what's so disgusting?"

"No, I won't be disgusted by what you've done... Don't worry..." He looked extremely anxious, and he was saying very serious things that were not wise, tearing down the east to make up for the west, but unfortunately I can't laugh now .

"I really didn't do anything." I suddenly wanted to defend myself, "Really..."

My words were blown away in the wind, in fact, I did it, I wrote a love letter.I want to say from the beginning to the end, the cause and the result are clearly explained, and it is very urgent to convince Wei Chengyu that I am not a very disgusting person.

But when the words came to his lips, he didn't know how to say them, and he wanted to scratch his head when he wanted to speak.I don't want to talk about that, I don't want to talk about that love letter.Because I like him and don't want to tell him.

I was speechless and my mouth was dry.How can you be willing to believe me.

Why do you hate me, why Bian Liang avoids me like a snake after receiving the love letter, why Brother Mian recites it like a feast on stage, why all the classmates are willing to be his accomplices.

Am I doing something wrong, or is it just because I'm a boy.I also have the answer in my heart.

Wei Chengyu hooked my shoulders and led me to the nearby neighborhood, wiping my tears all the time.I wanted to avoid it, but he insisted on wiping it, the texture of the sleeve was so worn that it hurt my cheek.

I said, "Don't rub it, it hurts so much." He finally responded, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Then he used his fingertips instead, Y. U. X. I.My lower eye socket was rubbed with a fiery mark.

Wei Chengyu took me to the garden where only dog ​​walkers usually go, and let me sit on the swing.I didn't know what he was going to do, I just sat down and looked down at the pebbles on the ground.And he was standing in front of me, and I could see his white sneakers out of the corner of my eye.

My cheeks were suddenly cupped and I was forced to raise my head.But I think it's stupid to cry, I don't want to be seen, I press my chin down hard, trying to escape in embarrassment: "What are you doing?"

"Oh, that... don't cry, okay..." He seemed to be rubbing a ball of wet wool, anxious and flustered, "Can I make a smiling face?"

I was rubbed dizzy and smiled as he wished.So Wei Chengyu got what he wanted, and naturally withdrew his hand.I hung my head, feeling empty.I knew I would stop laughing.

He asked me how I knew Yu Mian, and I said, Yu Mian was my classmate in junior high school.

He couldn't help it: "You were in junior high..."

coming soon.I know what he wants to ask.What the hell did I, Cen Xiao, do in junior high school? Why did Yu Mian righteously point at me and say it was disgusting.

I had to confess my crime: "I wrote a love letter to my deskmate at the time... But that love letter fell into Yu Mian's hands for some reason, he..."

Obviously it happened several years ago, but at this moment, I seem to be brought back to the scene to perform the scene again.I need to personally identify the place where the crime took place, and I also need to identify the butcher. In fact, everyone at the scene is an executioner to me.

I slipped my throat, forcibly suppressed the surge of emotions, and pretended to be calm: "He read the letter in public. Then...under his leadership, no one cares about me anymore."

Wei Chengyu didn't speak for a while, then he said "sloppy" again, and asked, "What did he do, did he bully you?"

Isn't this nonsense. "Of course." I happened to be wearing short sleeves, and I raised my elbow to show him the inconspicuous white scar. I was also really scared, thinking that yesterday would happen again.

In fact, there are many things, such as no one collects my homework, stationery will appear in unexpected corners, in the experimental class, I always have to complete the group experiment alone, and the reagents in the test tube will be emptied by the side if I am not careful. The pool can only start over.

But it would be cumbersome to enumerate one by one, and it would seem that I have a too good memory, care about every detail, and it would seem like I am selling misery and gaining sympathy.

I also remember that after graduation, the girl who invited me to eat Bibi’s strange flavored beans apologized to me on the Internet, saying that she chose to join forces because she did not dare to disobey Yu Mian.She said that I am actually a pretty good person, and it’s okay to like boys.

In the end, she even praised my love letter, saying that it was well written, and wished me the best of luck in finding my true love in the future.

Maybe she sincerely repented, maybe she was just moving herself, I forgave her from the deep understanding of righteousness, even though I was not relieved.

"I don't care..." Wei Chengyu asked, "...where is your teacher? Don't your parents know?"

The teacher may know, but there is no way to verify it.Mom and Dad's careers were in a critical rising period at that time, and they didn't go home during the period when they sprained their feet and recuperated.When they came back, I was already able to open the door briskly, so I simply told my aunt not to say anything.

I reported the above facts truthfully, and Wei Chengyu asked: "You just wrote a love letter, and you didn't forcefully kiss your tablemate..." He said, "... Isn't this an innocent disaster?" He still wants to argue with me about cause and effect Wrong, but in fact, they are all things that have already happened, so there is no need to get entangled.

I said: "That's it, it doesn't matter anymore." As far as I can see, I have a cowardly personality and like boys, and such disasters will always come.

He didn't speak for a long while, and suddenly held on to the iron chain of the swing, half-closed his eyes and frowned.

I was startled: "What's wrong?"

He shook his head twice, as if water had entered it.Finally said: "Oh fuck, I'm dizzy with anger."

I was speechless for a while, so I stood up quickly, trying to give him the position of the swing.

Wei Chengyu didn't sit down, "It can't just be like this." He said, standing in front of me like a shade tree, and then hugged me with respect and restraint, a very short and awkward hug, because we were both carrying a big schoolbag , so silly.

He patted me on the back like a comrade who had just left the battlefield, and said, "I'm sorry... I feel like everything I say is a bit pale... I didn't think about homosexuality carefully before, when I saw Yan Baoting's photo Subconsciously feel that it is not acceptable..."

He smiled awkwardly, and said vaguely: "Yu Mian, Wang Dong and I... When we were in kindergarten, we lived in a military compound. I remember that he liked to cry very much, and he kept losing fights with Wang Dong. When we were in primary school, I It’s much better to move away with Wang Dong, and not study in the same class. When I was in junior high school, I didn’t study in the same school, so I basically didn’t contact him much... Even Wang Dong told me about his current transfer. People will probably change. Bar……"

"That... well." He said, "I told you, you will definitely laugh at me..."

I finally worked up the courage to look up at him.Wei Chengyu showed some embarrassment, and smiled shyly: "I treat you like my younger brother, although I don't have a younger brother... I don't know why, but I think you are very funny, and I really want to take care of you... Anyway, you Don't worry, I'll take care of Yu Mian's matter."

He said: "Hey, do you still remember what I learned from Nong to sing, 'Look up, there will be dawn after the darkness, and there will always be a turning point with optimism...' Everything in junior high school is over, tomorrow is another day, a new semester! ...It's too late today, I'll treat you to some coconut milk tea tomorrow afternoon, okay? Be happy, ah."

I pursed my lips and smiled, then nodded.

Wei Chengyu was very anxious when he left, because Wang Xuebin called him instead of the teacher of the Youth League Committee and asked him where he died.I watched him walk with three steps and three turns, then sat back on the swing, put on the earphones and listened to "Today".Obviously there are so many ambiguous words in the song, but he only picked out two inspirational lines and sang them to me.

Although it is despicable... Usually I subconsciously avoid thinking about it, warning myself not to be so sentimental.

But in fact, I still can't help but secretly think - you are so kind to me, do you like me a little bit?

Turns out it was really just friendship.

Cherish today, look at you every time I love... I took the sentence that Wei Chengyu didn't finish singing in my heart, pretending that he sang it to me.

A wild tabby cat got out of the grass and came over and rubbed against my trouser leg.I have nothing to feed it, so I can only sit still, and I dare not reach out to touch it, for fear that it will have a bad temper and bite me.

The sun slowly sank, and the sunlight was lost to the sky.I was looping through the singles, counting the pebbles on the ground, and suddenly felt that Wei Chengyu was like the sun, he was very popular and good to friends, even people like me could enjoy the sun.

But the sun is for everyone to bask in the sun, so that everyone can keep warm.How can I covet the sun, alas.

"I seem to be able to fly, and your eyes lead me to fly." I sang along to the end of the earphones, and I hummed along. This is a true experience that I can't express.

The author says:

Although no one may care, I still mention it. Cen Xiao mentioned it a long time ago when I went to the library last time, hahaha.

Regarding Yu Mian, when the fireworks were set off during the Chinese New Year, what Wei Chengyu said to Wang Dong was: "Didn't you say that the big fish is coming." This corresponds to the fact that Dong and Yu have not been in touch since junior high school.

As for why the meeting is so hot, because Wei Chengyu is that kind of... people with social nb syndrome are like that [烟烟.jpg]

The last few chapters have caused me a headache. This chapter is relatively long. I will take a day off tomorrow...sorry! !Staying up late made my eyes dim, and I tried to maintain a rhythm of three breaks and one break after the holidays.