he is afraid, he pretends

Wen Siyuan stood at the door of Wu Luming's room and knocked lightly on the door a few times.

No one answered the first two times, but when he knocked for the third time, he increased his strength a little.

Still no answer.

Wen Siyuan lowered his eyes, and his eyes fell on the doorknob. After thinking for a moment, he raised his hand to hit it.

The door was unlocked and opened easily.

Wen Siyuan didn't push the door directly to go in, he just stood at the door and gently pushed the door open a small crack.

Wu Luming's room was dark, but not completely dark, because the curtains were not drawn.

The moonlight is thick tonight, and there are no clouds in the sky. The moonlight outside the window is enough to give a rough outline of most of the objects in the room.

The gap in the door, which is as wide as an adult's arm, is just enough to allow the person at the door to see the scene near the bed by the window.

I saw that the quilt in the middle of the bed was bulging, and it was not difficult to see that the people under the quilt were curled up.

Wen Siyuan stood quietly at the door for a while, seeing that the room was quiet all the time, and there was no movement on the ball on the bed, so he felt relieved and planned to leave.

However, as soon as his hand was put back on the doorknob to pull it, suddenly a sobbing sound that was so soft that it was almost hard to catch leaked from the room.

Wen Siyuan paused.

The voice seemed to be clenching the teeth, but it was really patient to the limit, and then a soft snort leaked out.

After the sound, there was another long silence, but Wen Siyuan gradually dispelled the thought of leaving directly.

Because he vaguely seemed to see that the raised quilt trembled slightly.

Standing at the door for a long time, Wen Siyuan finally pushed the door open again and walked into Wu Luming's room.

The structure of Wu Luming's room is not much different from that of his room, but the orientation is different, so the arrangement of the two rooms is almost in the opposite direction.

Floor mats were also laid between the big bed and the windows.

Wen Siyuan stepped on it, and when he was about to walk to the head of the bed, he saw Wu Luming's small face exposed outside the quilt.

The person curled up in the quilt was holding the quilt with one hand, half of his face was pressed against the bed, and the remaining half of his face exposed to the air was wet and covered with tears.

Not just tears, under the moonlight, the whole face of the person curled up on the bed was wrinkled, and the pain was obviously suppressed and endured.

Wen Siyuan frowned slightly, went to the bed and squatted down, and called Wu Luming's name.

At such a close distance, the person on the bed still didn't respond, and it didn't look like he didn't reply on purpose, but he really didn't hear it.

The mark between Wen Siyuan's eyebrows deepened by two points.

Seeing that Wu Luming hadn't responded, he raised his hand and put the back of his hand on Wu Luming's forehead.

The temperature under his hands was still very high, and Wen Siyuan even faintly felt that it was hotter than a few hours ago.

Probably because the feeling of putting his hand on his forehead was more intuitive, Wu Luming, who had not responded all this time, slowly opened his eyes after Wen Siyuan withdrew his hand on his forehead.

With the only light in the room, Wen Siyuan could clearly see the redness of Wu Luming's eyes after he opened them and the tears that were clenched in his eyes and slowly flowing out.

Looking at Wu Luming's appearance, he frowned even tighter for a moment, as if there was breath stuck in his throat, unable to get out or in.

Therefore, when he spoke, he tried to keep his voice as quiet as possible, for fear of disturbing the person in front of him: "Is it still uncomfortable?"

The person on the bed just looked at him with his eyes open and didn't respond aloud.

After a moment of silence in the room, Wen Siyuan spoke again: "Your forehead is still very hot. It has been nearly three hours since you finished taking the medicine. If you still feel uncomfortable, we must go to the hospital."

An ordinary sentence is not too long, but Wen Siyuan took some time to say it word by word as gently as possible, in order for Wu Luming to hear clearly, and also hoped to minimize Wu Luming's rejection of the hospital.

However, Wu Luming still just looked at him without any response, like a lifeless puppet.

After two rounds of talking, it is impossible for Wen Siyuan not to discover Wu Luming's abnormality again.

Although Wu Luming looked at him with his eyes open, the fundus of his eyes was hollow, and his eyes were also very loose. It didn't look like he was awake and conscious.

Wen Siyuan subconsciously lowered his body by another two points, and after looking at Wu Luming at the same level, he said again: "Can you recognize who I am?"

When he asked this question, what he thought was that if Wu Luming still didn't respond, then he would take Wu Luming to the hospital directly.

Unexpectedly, after he said these words, after a short while, Wu Luming, who had not responded, blinked his eyes slowly, and uttered two incoherent words in a hoarse voice: "Brother Yuan."

Wen Siyuan was taken aback, staring at Wu Luming who was close at hand for a long time before recovering.

Wu Luming's voice was very soft, probably because his face was pressed against the bed, his voice was muffled, two words came out of his mouth that didn't open or close obviously, with a slight sound when lips collided, in the dark In the silent night, a simple address is wrapped with indescribable intimacy.

There seems to be a little trust and dependence in the intimacy.

Wen Siyuan slowly recovered from the strange feeling, and glanced at the person in front of him who had recovered and was still looking at him.

He took a slow breath and agreed, "Well, it's me."

Under Wu Luming's continuous gaze, he tried to ask the question he asked the first time again: "Do you feel uncomfortable now?"

It may be that the response about his identity made Wu Luming recover from his confusion. Although he responded slowly, he answered Wen Siyuan's question this time.

"Uncomfortable." The hoarse voice was crying, and tears rolled out along with the words when he spoke.

People are always more vulnerable when they have a fever and are sick. Wen Siyuan is very clear about this, because every time his two children get sick, they will lose their usual mischievous appearance and cry on him.

Wen Siyuan thought about how to deal with the child at home when he had a fever, and when he spoke to Wu Luming, he subconsciously adopted the tone of talking to a child.

"Where is the pain?" he asked.

During the questioning, he just wanted Wu Luming to tell the specific illness, so that he could take the next sentence and abduct him to the hospital.

Unexpectedly, after the words fell, Wu Luming slightly closed his eyelids, his hand holding the quilt trembled slightly, and his words trembled: "I seem to be... going to... die."

The completely unexpected reply made Wen Siyuan stunned for a while. It was useless to say a word in his heart, and finally he just instinctively said: "Why?"

The boy's eyelashes wet with tears could not stop trembling under the moonlight.

"I can't see myself."

He pulled the quilt and retracted his face halfway under the quilt, and then a muffled voice came out from under the quilt.

"I can't find it, I... I can't find it... I can't find it, I'm going to disappear soon."

Wen Siyuan fell into a brief silence when he heard Wu Luming's seemingly illogical words suddenly uttered.

It wasn't until he saw Wu Luming buried his face deeper and deeper in the quilt that he stretched out his hand and gently pulled down the quilt that covered Wu Luming's face, lifted the boy's face out, and said in a serious tone, "I can see you."

When Wen Siyuan said it, he was actually not sure whether such a reply was correct or not.

But he vaguely felt that the person curled up in front of him at this moment seemed to be floating in the air, and would immediately float away as soon as the wind blows lightly, so he had to say something first to grab the person.

A long time after his words fell, Wu Luming's hand that was holding the quilt slowly moved away.

Wu Luming slowly moved his hand to Wen Siyuan's hand holding his face. He seemed to want to grab something, curled his fingers slightly, and pressed on the back of Wen Siyuan's hand.

"What is it like?" After grabbing Wen Siyuan firmly, he suddenly asked.

Wen Siyuan reacted for a while, and then understood the meaning of Wu Luming's question.

He looked into Wu Luming's eyes, and he didn't answer Wu Luming's question in a perfunctory manner, but after serious thinking for a long time, he answered rigorously.

He remembered the night when he and Wu Luming met for a long time for the first time, Wu Luming solved one complicated math problem after another without thinking too much.

So he said, "Smart."

He also remembered that before returning to the room every night, if Wu Luming went back to the second floor first, then when he returned to the second floor, there would be a small light at the corner of the second floor.

"meticulous."

I also remembered that once when I came home from school, I ran into Wu Luming who was feeding stray cats near his home.

When Wu Luming fed the cats, it was not much different from usual, with the same expressionless face, he squatted among a bunch of stray cats, and put the food on the ground bit by bit.

On the way to feed, if a cat rubs against his lap, he will not reach out to touch it, but he will not deliberately avoid the intimacy of the kitten. After all the feeding is done in a formal manner, he will clap his hands and get up to leave.

On the way to work, Wen Siyuan saw the temporary nest of the group of wild cats a few times.

They are a group of little guys who are very afraid of people. Many people will be vigilantly avoided by them when they go to feed them.

Not only did they not avoid Wu Luming, they even took the initiative to get close to him.

"Kind."

Just as Wen Siyuan finished speaking the third adjective, Wu Luming, whose face was leaning against his hand, suddenly shook his head lightly, his eyes were full of confusion and emptiness.

"No," he said softly, "I'm not like that."

Wen Siyuan didn't speak out to refute Wu Luming's words, he stared at Wu Luming's expression, and asked aloud: "What do you think you are?"

Wu Luming didn't answer right away.

After blinking his eyes slowly twice, he suddenly raised his head slightly and looked out the window.

Outside the window is the shadow of trees and snow-capped mountains.

He looked at the swaying black tree shadow on the window for a long time before he said, "I hit someone."

His voice suddenly became very calm, calmer than at any moment: "I beat him covered in blood, I saw his blood stained on my hands, dripping from my hands Fall back on him."

When he said this, he paused for a moment, retracted his gaze from the window, and looked at Wen Siyuan again.

Still a calm tone.

"Seeing so much blood for the first time, a normal person should feel scared, but I felt excited, an unprecedented excitement. I seemed to see a wild beast, which broke free from the cage with its bloody claws."

Wen Siyuan didn't notice when Wu Luming stopped crying.

Those beautiful eyes were empty without tears.

Wen Siyuan frowned slightly, and asked aloud, "Before you hit that person, did that person do anything?"

Wen Siyuan's answer caused a flash of surprise in Wu Luming's eyes, as if he didn't expect that Wen Siyuan's first reaction was to ask him instead of telling him that beating someone was wrong.

Wen Siyuan didn't get a response immediately, and Wen Siyuan asked again: "Or, what kind of person is he, is he a good person or a bad person?"

Wu Luming was silent for a moment, then suddenly buried his face slightly in Wen Siyuan's hands.

Then a muffled voice sounded: "I can't tell the difference. If he is a bad person, then can I be considered a good person? If he is a good person, then what am I?"

He finished speaking in a calm tone, touched his slightly dry lips, and suddenly said: "I may really be a monster."

Like a death row prisoner who no longer had any expectations, he calmly sentenced himself to death.

Hearing Wu Luming's words, Wen Siyuan frowned more and more.

The touch in the palm of his hand was still hot, but the feeling of the person in front of him gradually became cold.

After a long period of silence, he felt that the person whose face was pressed into his palm seemed to be about to back away.

Before Wu Luming could move, he said again: "Are you willing to believe my words?"

Under the moonlight, the boy's tear-wet eyelashes trembled slightly, and the emptiness in his eyes was slightly replaced by doubt when he looked at him.

Doubt was slowly replaced by concentration.

Under Wen Siyuan's gaze, Wu Luming nodded slowly.

"Okay." Wen Siyuan said, and said to Wu Luming in a chatty tone, "The question I just asked has its own problems."

"When I was in college, I participated in a debate. The topic of that debate was simple but not simple. The topic was 'good and evil'." Wen Siyuan said slowly in a soft voice.

"The center of that debate was a college student who had received many years of good education. He abided by most of the social rules, would give up his seat to the elderly on the bus, and thank others warmly after receiving help. He didn't swear, No smoking, no drinking, no spitting anywhere, and he will help others when they need it, but when a gangster puts a knife on the neck of a young child in front of him, his choice is to shrink to The crowd fell silent."

"The other is a social person who hasn't listened carefully to nine years of compulsory education. He smokes, drinks, fights, and curses. But when someone weaker than him is hurt in front of him, his first reaction is to fight the gangster. .”

"With two people like this, who do you say is good and who is evil?"

"Everyone knows that burning, killing, and looting is wrong, and respecting the old and loving the young is worth advocating, but not everything in this world can be easily distinguished from good and evil like burning, killing, and looting or respecting the old and loving the young. The thing is, people are more."

After Wen Siyuan finished speaking, he paused for a moment, looked at Wu Luming, and said seriously: "You may not be completely smart, not completely meticulous, and not completely kind, but you will definitely not be a monster."

A long time after the words fell, under Wu Luming's dazed expression, Wen Siyuan said affirmatively again: "Trust my ability to discern, you are not."

Before Wu Luming gave a response, a bright light suddenly appeared outside the window.

The sound of fireworks and firecrackers sounded in patches, surrounding the ears of the two of them.

The gorgeous flames illuminated Wu Luming's face.

He stared at Wen Siyuan with wide eyes, tears slipped from the corners of his eyes without warning.

The cheers of children came from downstairs, accompanied by the laughter of adults.

Wu Luming buried his face in Wen Siyuan's palm amidst the noise.

The palms became moist again, amidst the sound of fireworks and laughter, Wen Siyuan heard a very soft cry, but he was no longer suppressed.

The author has something to say:

I'm here friends, I'm here with a flag, in the next few days until the end of the National Day holiday, I want daily updates!

Of course, if I don't do it, you guys will treat me as a fart (hehehehehehe