he is afraid, he pretends

Wen Siyuan's mood was not high all day today.

During the period from eating at noon to going home at night, he clicked on the chat box of wx on his mobile phone no less than ten times.

Three out of ten times he quit directly, and for the remaining seven times, he read the chat records between him and Wu Luming from beginning to end, over and over again.

Everyone has their own lacking parts, and Wen Siyuan has always known that he is not good at social chatting.

But before he opened the chat history, he really didn't expect that he was not good at it to such an outrageous level.

The relationship between him and Wu Luming was a few days before Wu Luming moved into his house, Wu Luming joined him through Wu Shengjin.

For more than a month after the two became friends, especially after Wu Luming moved into his house, the two basically exchanged several messages every day.

However, most of the initiators of this exchange of news were Wu Luming, and even in the early stage, his replies to Wu Luming were basically concise words within five characters.

In the later stage, it was only under the reminder of Xu Qiqi that there was a slight improvement.

Wen Siyuan has always believed that people with different personalities have different ways of dealing with things. It is good to be good at communication, and there is nothing wrong with being silent.

Today he has a new understanding that there is nothing wrong with being silent, but this should be based on the premise that he has no one who wants to actively communicate.

Once there, silence is deadly.

Because he can only talk business-like, and has no idea how to start a small talk.

Before, Xu Qiqi only told him how to reply in order to keep the chat going.

But replying alone was useless today, because Wu Luming hadn't sent him a single message in the whole day since he moved back to school.

The chat records of the two even stayed a few days ago.

After hearing those words from Cen Xiwen at noon today, Wen Siyuan intermittently recalled some trivial things about living in the cottage in Wu's hometown two years ago.

Walking from the alley to the restaurant, after sitting down in the restaurant, Wen Siyuan suddenly wanted to talk to Wu Luming very urgently.

Face to face is the best. If it doesn’t work, you can also make a phone call. No matter how bad it is, just chat with each other on wx.

But Wu Luming didn't send him a message, and he also found that he didn't know how to take the initiative to send a message to Wu Luming.

He repeatedly flipped through the previous chat records between the two, trying to imitate what Wu Luming opened the chat and sent when he was looking for him before.

But soon he discovered that almost none of those words could be used.

Because Wu Luming mostly asked him if he would go home for dinner, occasionally invited him to go to the supermarket, and once or twice asked him if he wanted to go to the nearby library.

Wu Luming doesn't live in his house now, so these topics are obviously not acceptable.

Before going home at night, Wen Siyuan finally couldn't hold back, and Guan Xu Qiqi asked for a few standard beginnings to open the topic.

He saw Xu Qiqi hesitated to speak all over his face, and finally sent him a lot.

Don't look at your phone while driving.

It's a 10-minute drive home from school.

If you send a message to Wu Luming before going home, Wen Siyuan can't guarantee that if Wu Luming sends him a message on the way back, will he be able to resist not replying.

After carefully considering the traffic conditions and possible stops on the way back, he finally chose to go home and then leave.

But before driving home, he took some time to pick out a sentence that was barely acceptable from the pile of things Xu Qiqi sent.

After 10 minutes, park the car in the underground garage smoothly.

Wen Siyuan didn't get out of the car immediately, but took out his mobile phone first, opened the chat box with Wu Luming, and prepared to send Wu Luming the sentence that kept spinning in his head along the way.

Just after losing and preparing to send, Wen Siyuan accidentally glanced at the time on the upper left corner of the phone, and found that it was already nine o'clock at night.

Nine o'clock is a late time for Wen Siyuan.

Although Wu Luming is still awake at this time in most cases, a few possibilities are not ruled out.

Today was the first day of class after the National Day holiday, and he remembered that Wu Luming's class was still full today.

The lights of University C are turned off at ten o'clock in the evening. If you live in the dormitory, you must wash up before ten o'clock. Wu Luming will definitely be very tired after tossing around all day.

At this time, if he sent a message to Wu Luming, would it disturb Wu Luming's rest?

Wen Siyuan pinched the phone and thought for a long time, and when he came back to his senses, he found that the screen of the phone was black.

However, Wen Siyuan still hasn't decided whether to send the message or not.

He was a little surprised. Do you need to worry about so many things when you take the initiative to send a message to someone?

Is he thinking too much, or does everyone do this?

Before Wu Luming took the initiative to send him a message, would he have thought about it a lot?

Finally, after 5 minutes of serious thinking, Wen Siyuan still did not send the message.

He put away his mobile phone and got out of the car. After 2 minutes, he took the elevator to the door of his house. When he opened the door, he was in a trance for a moment.

The living room was pitch black.

The dark living room was the norm in the past, but after Wu Luming moved in, every time Wen Siyuan came home, Wu Luming was basically in the living room.

Even if there are a few cases where he is not in the living room, Wu Luming will specially leave a small light at the door for him.

Wen Siyuan suddenly remembered the saying that it takes 28 days to form a habit.

For the first time, he realized that this sentence was indeed true.

He was used to facing the dark and empty living room after returning home for nearly nine years, but it took Wu Luming just one month for him to become unaccustomed.

Wen Siyuan didn't stand at the door for too long.

He went into the house to change his shoes, then unloaded his things and went back to the house to wash.

It was almost 09:30 after I showered and dried my hair.

In the past, at this time, he basically went to sleep after simply handling some official duties.

But he wasn't in the mood tonight.

After drying his hair and standing in the room for a while, he walked out of the bedroom. After staying in the guest room where Wu Luming lived for a long time, he finally walked to the living room, took the remote control on the coffee table and turned on the TV.

Wen Siyuan couldn't remember how long he hadn't watched TV.

The last time I saw it, it seemed that I was still with Wu Luming.

He checked the channels and found that almost all the major stations were broadcasting idol dramas at this time.

Wen Siyuan clicked on an emotional talk show, and was about to click on it as usual, when he suddenly saw the topic of this interview on the title—the ideal partner.

The show seems to have just begun, and several guests are talking about their ideal partners.

As Wen Siyuan listened, his thoughts suddenly drifted away.

Wen Siyuan has rarely taken the initiative to think about the word "partner", but it is inevitable that someone around him will ask, so he will think about it occasionally.

Probably because his emotional cells are not well developed, he doesn't have a very clear direction of expectation for his future partner.

When he was a teenager, he remembered that one time between classes, he was reading a favorite foreign travel book.

His tablemate suddenly asked him what type of girl he likes.

Unlike most boys and girls whose hormones are ready to go, Wen Siyuan in his youth has no interest in these things, so he doesn't spend time thinking about them at all.

But it was probably because he was reading his favorite travel notes at that time, and he suddenly thought that it would be great if he could quietly read the same book with him and exchange ideas while reading.

But that was only a rare clear thought when he was young. More often, he thought of the word "partner", which was accompanied by the touch of the word "home".

For a period of time in his junior year, his thoughts were heavy.

Once when he returned to his residence from school, he saw his dark windows downstairs in the community. He suddenly remembered that when he was a child, his father was busy with work and often worked overtime until late at night before returning home.

At that time, my mother would often wait for my father to come home in the living room. Sometimes I couldn't bear it anymore, so I would definitely keep the living room lights on.

For a moment, looking at the bright lights of other houses, he suddenly thought that the lights in his own living room could be turned on.

When Wen Siyuan lived here alone, he actually tried cooking in the kitchen.

After trying for three days, and being complained by both upstairs and downstairs, he finally gave up his mind.

But every time I return to City A from my hometown during Chinese New Year, I still miss the fireworks at home for a while.

Wen Siyuan suddenly remembered that every spring and summer, there would always be some wild cats near the community.

He has never had much interest in small animals, and he didn't pay much attention to them when he saw them when passing by in the past years.

But when he passed by in the past two years, he always stopped for a while.

Throat a little dry for no reason.

Wen Siyuan subconsciously went to get the water glass, and when his hands were empty, he remembered that his usual water glass was accidentally broken yesterday morning.

Seeing this, he got up and went into the kitchen, and opened the kitchen cabinet with the spare water cup.

When he was about to take out a water glass, his eyes touched something in the transparent bag next to the water glass, and his movements suddenly stopped.

This kitchen cabinet is specially used to put utensils such as cups and plates.

Beside the neatly arranged cups, there is a transparent plastic bag. Inside the plastic bag are several transparent plastic cups, which look very similar to the cups in the milk tea shop.

Wen Siyuan was sure that he hadn't put this bag of plastic cups in the kitchen cabinet, but this plastic cup seemed familiar to him somehow.

After a while, he didn't know what he thought of, and suddenly walked to the trash can beside him.

He doesn't usually use the kitchen, let alone throw garbage in the kitchen.

Apparently, Wu Luming was the only one who threw rubbish into the trash can in the kitchen.

There are not many things in the trash can, a little used plastic wrap, and a plastic cup under the plastic wrap.

The cup Wen Siyuan brought back from the coffee shop the day before yesterday, Xu Qiqi gave him a cup of milk tea.

The cup is a very ordinary transparent plastic cup, the only feature is that there is a circle of black printing in the middle of the cup body.

Because at dinner that night, everyone drank the milk tea given by Xu Qiqi, so Wen Siyuan had the impression that everyone's milk tea cups were the same.

Wen Siyuan stared at the cups in the trash can for a while, then walked back to the kitchen cabinet and took out the plastic cups inside.

Exactly the same black print.

Wen Siyuan frowned instantly, and the hand holding the bag tightened unconsciously.

Recalling Xu Qiqi's inexplicable "you will regret it if you don't drink" that night, he suddenly couldn't breathe.

Stiff was unable to respond for a long time before the kitchen cabinet.

Wen Siyuan forgot how old he was, and was said to be sensible and mature.

I vaguely remember when I was very young.

He doesn't think much of what others say.

Because he feels that compared with most of his peers, he is just good at one thing earlier than them - making choices.

He began to realize at a very young age that people need to face various choices every day.

Weighing the pros and cons to make the right choice in the fastest time will make many things much easier.

Therefore, weighing the pros and cons day after day, as he grows older, when many problems arise, he may not need to think through his brain, and his subconscious mind will make decisions for him.

Wen Siyuan heard many people say that he has a bad memory, and he always can't remember people with little contact and trivial things in life.

It’s not wrong for them to say this, but to be more precise, it’s not that he can’t remember, but that his brain will choose to forget some insignificant things or things that will affect his original life trajectory.

Wen Siyuan believes that the memories and things that can be carried in a person's life are limited.

Regularly delete some unnecessary or unnecessary content, just like cleaning the memory of a mobile phone regularly, it will make life easier and simpler.

No one knew that when Wen Siyuan was 24 years old, he made two important decisions.

One is that he decides to stay in City A to continue his Ph.D., and the other is that when he turns 25 next year, he thinks he can try to start a relationship.

25 years old is a very suitable watershed in life.

At this age, he has already determined his life plan for at least the next ten years, and he also owns a car and a house that are very important in the eyes of his elders. He feels that he is capable and responsible for a relationship.

He knows that he is not very good at love, so when he turns 25, he should consciously pay more attention to the people around him, or simply follow the arrangement of his parents and try a few blind dates.

His family is in a small town in the county seat of city A. People in the small town always get married earlier. After returning home in the past two years, his mother has already mentioned to him about the blind date.

If you can really follow the plan and have a lover at the age of 25, then you can talk about a relationship for a year or two, and you can consider getting married according to the wishes of the other party.

All of Wen Siyuan's assumptions about love are based on what he has seen of his parents loving each other, and the fixed trend of life that most elders have mentioned to him.

However, at the moment when 25 years old came, the hour hand went to zero, and the New Year's Eve fireworks illuminated the night sky, there was a boy who was crying softly in his palm.

So he planned to pay more attention to the people around him, make blind dates, and fall in love, but he didn't do it.

Not at 25, not at 26, not at 27 either.

Everyone is a beast trapped in a cage, large or small.

Wu Luming is, and so is Wen Siyuan.

The author has something to say:

Xiaowen’s inner world will take everyone through. The next chapter will meet the two treasures. I guess it will take two or three chapters to fall in love.