are you a clown

Lin Chensan was unaware of this kind of discussion among the people in the same group, but maybe even if she knew, she would probably laugh it off and say nothing.

Just like now.

This time, Ma Tiantian and Zhao Lingmeng were here for dinner in the cafeteria. Just listening to the interesting stories Zhao Lingmeng met in the hospital was enough to pass the time.

……

"I was lying in the hospital, and now the doctor asks me every day if I have been out of the province, have I been in contact with people in high-risk areas, have I had a cold, fever, cough, and diarrhea. I said, I have been asked three times in the three days since I entered the hospital. Why is my throat sore? Yan still needs to do double resistance?"

Ma Tiantian propped up her chin: "The dual-antibody should be for accuracy, but can this situation be laughed at? Is it not too serious?"

"To make you laugh, I don't mean to make you laugh at others." Zhao Lingmeng twisted his neck, kicked his legs and said, "Speaking of which, have you all decided not to go back during the Chinese New Year? My main reason is that the round-trip fare is too expensive. This job is also newly found, and I don’t have much savings, so it’s okay if I don’t go back for a year, what’s your reason?”

"I don't have a good relationship with my family, and I don't plan to go back until I can reconcile." Ma Tiantian said, "Otherwise, if I go back in this situation, basically there won't be a good day, and the family will be in trouble all day long. It's going to be like a chicken flying dog jumping."

"The relationship with the family is not good, is it because of work?"

"Well, my previous job was introduced by my family. After I resigned, my parents felt that I owed them favors. The main reason was that I shouldn't do that. I can't bear the birdishness of that kind of birdman. "

"Going to work through a relationship, either it is very cheap, and I only drink tea and read the newspaper every day, and I am very free, or I am from a serf background, and the boss who washes socks has to care whether it is head or tail. When I am about to graduate, my parents also Introduced it to me, but I was afraid of falling into the pit, so I didn't go there."

... The topic got farther and farther away, until Ma Tiantian found out that Lin Chensan had been silent all this time, so she couldn't favor one another, so she looked at Lin Chensan: "What about you? Why don't you go home during the Chinese New Year?"

Lin Chensan thought that he would avoid talking about it this time like the last time he faced Lin Jianwu, but this time, he was not so conflicted emotionally. After the depression in his heart dissipated, he could speak well: "There are a total of seven days off during the Chinese New Year. It's almost two days before and after the car ride. I still get motion sickness. It's very troublesome to go back."

"Good guy, are you sick of the train or the high-speed rail?" Zhao Lingmeng was a little bluffing.

"It's the kind of minibus that faints in the countryside. No matter which way you go home, there must be a minibus ride of four to ten minutes. According to my current physical fitness, it will definitely kill people, absolutely."

"If you get motion sickness, just take a car more." Ma Tiantian said.

"I think we should eat more meat. Zero times three, you eat too much vegetarian food." Zhao Lingmeng retorted Ma Tiantian's words.

"Probably." Lin Chensan replied somewhat vaguely.

Ma Tiantian asked again: "Then don't you plan to go back? If you keep getting carsick, you won't go back?"

"It's hard to say, maybe I won't go back forever." Lin Chensan was not sure about the future, so he could only express his most sincere thoughts.

"Isn't this too coquettish?" Although Zhao Lingmeng said so, his tone was very normal, and he probably just used such an Internet buzzword to suit the situation, "But why? Zero times three, you don't want home, you don't want Dad Damn it?"

"Think?" Lin Chensan thought for a while, the soft part of her heart was trembling, but she had long been used to such changes, she paused for a moment, then shook her head, "I don't want to go home, and I don't want them."

"If it's possible, I don't want to see them in my life." Lin Chensan's eyes are bright, and she completely gathers the expressions of the two people in front of her, but she is not afraid of how much such words will affect the other party's mind The image of herself in the book, what kind of person she is, then what kind of person she is.

Zhao Lingmeng didn't believe it at all: "You're lying. How can there be children who don't want to go home or their parents? You're just a dead duck. When you've had enough of wandering outside, don't you have to run home crying? Home is the only harbor. Only parents in this world will love you unconditionally..."

And Ma Tiantian bumped into Zhao Lingmeng: "Stop talking, Zhao Lingmeng."

"Why can't you say it? Although it's zero times three, since I've said such a thing, as her friend, it's my duty to give her a friendship blow, right?" Zhao Lingmeng glared at Ma Tiantian, "She really Do you know what you're talking about right now?"

Ma Tiantian's expression also became serious: "I think she knows better than you who are not involved."

"Are you teaching me a lesson?"

"I'm not telling you. I'm just telling the truth."

"You are teaching me, Ma Tiantian, how dare you teach me."

Ma Tiantian glanced at Lin Chensan, and then said: "If you think I'm teaching you a lesson, then I'm teaching you a lesson. Why, Friendship Breaking Face Fist, are you going to punch me in the face?"

Zhao Lingmeng was angry, she was really angry, and she was so angry that she couldn't be coaxed well, super angry, she got up, took the plate, turned around and left angrily, the walking posture, I don't know I thought I was practicing goose step.

On New Year's Eve, there were very few people in the cafeteria.

Only now did Lin Chensan speak: "Aren't you going to catch up?"

"I thought you would thank me for helping you out." Ma Tiantian moved a dozen small egg tarts that Zhao Lingmeng forgot to take away, and took a bite into her mouth. All right?"

"It's not something that can't be said." Although Lin Chensan said so, before today, she would have classified it as one of the options that could not be said. But for now, she Nodding: "Well, no problem."

"If there's nothing wrong, I can't hold back my curiosity. I've always been curious." Ma Tiantian wiped her mouth with toilet paper after eating an egg tart. She put on an expression of a curious baby, "What kind of family can raise a child like you, so precocious."

"Children? Sister Tiantian, you are not much older than me."

"I don't know how such an impression came about. Although your understanding of society and people is a lot that I don't know, and many insights are very unique, but it's just a feeling." Ma Tiantian smiled After a while, he said, "Maybe Lin Chensan, you have never grown up."

Another person who treats her like a child.

Fortunately, Lin Chensan is not surprised anymore, she replied directly: "Actually, it's quite simple, just leave it alone. If a child is smart, it is said to be inherited from him, and his genes are good; if the child is stupid , I just said that I didn’t study hard, and it must have nothing to do with me. I put on a face that I love my child, but in fact I don’t even know what grade the child is in. The only time I called the class teacher in three years of high school, It's not about studying, but about when the holiday will be, because the old mother will celebrate her [-]th birthday, and I hope the child can go home to toast the old mother at that time, but in fact it doesn't make any difference whether he comes back or not. The old mother has six children, and there are so many grandchildren. As for me, when I was young, I was not liked by my grandparents because of patriarchal things. I have to take the car back to school by myself before eating half of it... If I usually ask for leave because of illness, they may agree, but every time before agreeing, they will doubt whether I don’t want to go to school. , They seem to have achieved some major phased victory, and the tone of that really makes me never want to say a word to them again."

"This is roughly the situation. If you are interested, I can say more." Lin Chensan felt that he should praise his frankness. Zhao Lingmeng's egg tarts could not be eaten by Ma Tiantian alone. , she took one too, not feeling ashamed at all for her behavior.

Lin Chensan's behavior made Ma Tiantian feel that the former's mental state is not bad, and she was very happy about it: "It sounds like you are very dissatisfied with your parents."

"Unsatisfied? It's okay. They are also parents for the first time. When they were still children, most of the parents were in charge of birth and care, and then when they became parents, they were in charge of care." Regardless of parenting, in some respects they have come a long way. Compared with other parents, they still know that men and women are treated equally. When I dropped out in high school, they refused to agree. My father considers himself an intellectual, and he would never hit anyone when he gets angry. Although my mother always said that my brother and I would have divorced and run away long ago, she is responsible for a considerable part of my brother’s life and tuition fees. As ordinary parents, they may still be above the passing line."

"But your family has no education for children at all."

"Economic constraints, all education issues are economic issues. Although I think that even if they are rich and free, they may not be able to settle down and care about what their children are thinking. I am in front of my father. I got the right to speak after I was in college, and he thinks that I am an intellectual, and I have enough ability to talk to him... As usual, he would not bother to listen to my words." Lin Chensan finished eating an egg tart , and I don’t plan to eat more, “I don’t ask them how much they love me, as long as they are in good health and spirit before I am 30 years old, I will be thankful.”

"What about after 30?"

"Let's talk about it after the age of 30. If I'm still a waste at that time, I probably can't help it."

"You don't have any sense of family responsibility."

Lin Chensan just shook his head: "I just know that just like they can't raise their children, it's also difficult for me to do a good job of supporting them."