[HP] Illusion

Wanting to leave is actually a very easy but not easy thing, as long as you dare to completely abandon your responsibilities, then leaving will become easier.

The same can be seen for resignation.

To be honest, Harry had thought about resigning a long time ago.

Before entering that world, this word has never appeared in his life dictionary. Entering Hogwarts can be said to be for the Pensieve, or it can be said to find his sustenance.Such sustenance can make his life fuller instead of only skinny.

Hogwarts is such a place, where you can see the seedlings growing up under your care, you can see youth and vitality, you can see the future of the wizarding world, and you can see hope...

Harry has deep feelings for this place. Since he entered Hogwarts to study at the age of 11, he has regarded it as his home. In such a place, it is very reluctant to leave.

He was reluctant to part with his colleagues here, and also his own students.He has worked here for more than four years and lived here for more than ten years. It is impossible to say that he has no feelings.

When he calmed down and thought about whether he really needed to resign, he even found that he was reluctant to part with anything.

But when he stayed in that world longer and longer, and after he couldn't find a way to get in and out at will, the balance in his heart tilted again and again.

He already knew that he was crazy. He didn't quite understand what he was thinking, but he couldn't control it.

——Maybe I really don’t want to control it.

In this world, there is always such a thing that makes you willing to continue to do it even if it hurts like a thousand arrows, even if it hurts your head, no matter what the purpose is.

For Harry, the people here are living a good life, obviously happy, they can support each other, they can overcome difficulties hand in hand, and they will live a happier life in the future.

And he couldn't.In fact, what he knew was that he cut off such an opportunity himself.He could feel their concern, but that was far from enough, the wound in his heart was still there, even the surface hadn't healed, let alone the inside was full of wounds.The black hole-like crack was getting bigger and bigger, and it would swallow him whole at some point.

—He knows all of this.

That night Harry came to the tower that he had not seen for a long time, sitting on the spiral staircase extending to the top of the tower, feeling the cool night wind on his face, looking up at the bright stars in the deep and quiet night sky.But in fact, like many times before, he didn't know what he was looking at.

These days, he kept asking himself whether that place was a real world.

——In fact, he has not thought about this question for a long time.

People in that world will bleed and cry, their bodies are warm, they can be touched, they can be hugged, and they look real no matter how they look.

But no matter how much effort he made, history has not changed because of it.

Because that was Snape's memory, something that had already happened.So no matter what he does, nothing will change.

Even if history has turned a corner, it is the same goal by different routes.He is a bloody witness of this result.

But he still couldn't help it, he always hoped that he could change even a little bit of their fate, then his parents would not die, and Snape would not feel guilty for the rest of his life, just like him now, trapping himself to death in a certain place point.

But even if nothing changed, Harry thought, he would still want to go to that world.

— Even if you give up everything here.

He will miss this world, and he will also care about the people in this world, but in this world, he really has nothing to do.

Of course, he didn't completely give up on this world, after all, he would still come back, because he didn't stay in that world forever, and if he decided to focus on that world, it would mean that he had given up here.

He also asked himself if it was worth it.

Yes, he thought a lot.

Maybe it's just a world he made up, maybe his mind went crazy, those are all dreams he made up.

Perhaps, everything is just his illusion.

——He has thought about all these.

Actually nothing worth it or not.Dumbledore said "greater interests", such things are actually very empty, they can't grasp or touch them.

In this world, Voldemort is dead. He doesn't need to die with the world's most evil dark wizard, nor does he need to protect anyone. He won't kill people around him because of an inexplicable prophecy. This is a peace. In a world of peace and prosperity, this world will get better and better. If he is not wrong, this will be the best era.

Resigning and leaving, focusing on that world, being able to get in touch with little Snape before exhausting his life, was perhaps the most selfish thing he did.But he still wanted to do it, even though he knew it was wrong.

He didn't care if it was his hallucination, or whether it was a self-deception or a deception.

Of course, he has felt that that world is very real for a long time, probably because that world has been consuming his life, and because he frequently enters and exits that world, his physical condition is also deteriorating, and all physiological functions are constantly changing. Fading, if it weren't for the huge energy required to enter and exit the two worlds, his body would not be as bad as it is now.

In his view, resignation is certain, and the key point is when is the most suitable and practical time.

"Why are you here?" A very familiar, light-sounding voice suddenly sounded next to Harry's ear, "Long time no see."

Harry really couldn't react right away, but he sat up almost reflexively when he heard the sound.

Helena waved her hand in front of Harry, noticing that he was still maintaining a supercilious expression, and finally couldn't help pulling the bloody Barrow back and forth towards Harry.

Harry shivered violently, the feeling of being penetrated by the ghost was like a huge ice cube was stuffed into his body, completely freezing him.

But because of this, he woke up completely.

Helena still wanted to pass through, but Harry quickly built an air wall in front of him. This magic is not very useful to ghosts, but when he did this, Helena also stopped her half-prank actions .

"Am I occupying this place...to disturb the two of you?" Harry looked at the hands held by the two, and asked rather subtly.

In fact, he wanted to ask Helena more about what he had offended her.

As if aware of Harry's gaze, Helena quickly shook off the bloody Baron's hand, "What are you talking about?" the Ravenclaw ghost pretended to be stupid, "We just happened to pass by here."

"Shall we make an appointment to jump from here together?" This is a pastime that the two ghosts are particularly fond of recently. Harry swears that on the occasional nights when he doesn't fall asleep, he can always see the two of them jumping and playing from the tower, following the wind. Swaying, there is a stormy weather, and the two ghosts are even blown by the wind to the other side of the dark black lake.

"We've already died once." Different from the previous sensitivity, Helena has been very open-minded about this after talking about it, and she can even say it in a joking tone. "What were you doing just now? You weren't thinking about jumping off here, were you?"

"Is this your black humor?" Harry twitched his lips, "Of course I don't."

After taking a serious look at the young man's expression, Helena gave him a particularly ugly smirk, "Not now, I must have thought about it before."

Harry didn't feel the slightest embarrassment of being exposed, but turned his head to look at the bloody Barrow very naturally: "So is that game fun?"

He is really interested to know, can ghosts also experience the feeling of weightlessness?

"It's fun." Bloody Baron replied in his cold metallic voice.

Harry didn't think he sounded amused at all.

"But you don't even want to play with us." Helena raised her face, and seemed to have regained her reserve.

Harry suddenly took out his wand and said into the air, "Firebolts are coming."

Not long after, his Firebolt flew into his hand with a "rumble", "I don't want to jump and play, so it's okay..."

It is not difficult to have fun together in mid-air,

"Harry?!" The female ghost only shouted, and Harry had already accelerated to a great distance with a "swoosh". For a broomstick like the Firebolt, which can accelerate to 150 kilometers in ten seconds, even if the two ghosts want to It is not easy to catch up.

"What on earth is he doing?"

The bloody Barrow didn't speak. Helena pursed her lips and looked at Harry who was galloping in the air, always feeling that the next second, Harry would give up his broomstick and fall towards the ground.

Then she heard Barrow say, "Follow."

"He doesn't seem to have anything to worry about," Helena said softly, "Although his condition doesn't look very good, I kind of believe what he said."

The two floated in the air for a long time before the bloody Baro said, "Don't believe what he said too much."

"I always use Ravenclaw's keenness and intelligence to judge and analyze his behavior and language." Helena raised her head proudly, looking at the black spot that was scurrying around and about to disappear in the distance.

"Some people can't be completely controlled by analysis alone." Barrow took Helena and flew towards Harry's direction.

The man has never been better.Since the war.

Barrow could only see a small part of Harry, the part of guilt he knew all too well how it felt.

Because there was never any way to make it up, he added a bloody shackle to atone for his sin.This is something anyone can see.Harry had it too - except for himself, no one could see the shackles.

Maybe he couldn't understand many things, but he knew one thing, without Harry, there would always be an unresolved knot between him and Helena.He really hoped that he could help this person, even though he didn't know exactly what he could help.

This night Harry was not like usual, he almost fell asleep at a certain point, and had to rely on Kreacher to wake him up in the morning, he hadn't been flying like this for a long time.

Even if he had class early the next morning, he appeared on the podium in good spirits without drinking the refreshing potion, and the flying for most of the night didn't seem to have any impact on him at all.

It was already Wednesday, and he had another day of class tomorrow, during which time his spirit was in a state of excitement.

But after finishing class on Thursday afternoon, the sequelae came out. Almost as soon as he returned to the office and went into the bathroom to take a shower, his mental state was a little bit overwhelmed, and he almost went to the office again. He fell asleep in the bathtub, but fortunately Kreacher knew how to take care of him, so he was not directly submerged in the water.And he might have been overdrawn before, so no matter what Kreacher called him that night, Harry couldn't wake up.But miraculously, at eight o'clock the next day, Harry woke up by himself.

He slept for more than twelve hours, and Kreacher had prepared everything for him. After Harry had breakfast, he took Kreacher and left.

When he arrived at the Burrow, everyone was already making the final preparations. As soon as Harry entered, he was dragged to work. Since it was the last day, he hardly had time to catch his breath.

As for the last night bachelor party that Bill proposed to hold, they were too tired to do it anymore, but no one poured a glass of champagne and clinked glasses, and muddled this so-called bachelor party in a very shabby way.

At night, Harry and Ron still slept in the same room.

They only kept a small night light for themselves, and the hazy yellow soft light was obviously more suitable for sleeping.

In fact, Ron and Hermione's house had already been prepared, but since they were going to get married tomorrow with Hermione, of course they had to stay at the Burrow that night, and get up the next morning to pick up the bride at Hermione's house.

Unlike the shell cottage on the coast that Bill and Fleur chose, the location they chose was quite close to the Ministry of Magic. Harry had visited it before, and it was a small apartment with two bedrooms and one living room that wasn't too big. Although small and well-equipped, the surrounding environment is also quite good.

If the two are ready to enjoy the two-person world and don’t plan to have a child so soon, the size of this house is the most suitable. It takes 15 minutes for the two of them to walk to the workplace every morning, which is just right for exercising .

Harry actually fell asleep as soon as he touched the pillow. To be honest, the young man is not nervous-it has nothing to do with whether he is the groom or not, but his body can't stand it, but obviously the groom-to-be has nothing to do with his brain waves Synchronize.

"Harry..." When Harry's eyes were about to close, he suddenly heard Ron's whispering voice, so Harry had to gather his energy to deal with him.

"Do you want to ask me for the dreamless potion?" Harry fumbled for a space pocket next to his pillow, then dug and dug inside for a long time, and took out a small bottle of black potion, "enough You sleep until tomorrow morning."

Ron looked at him suspiciously. At this moment, Harry's eyes were almost narrowed. "Don't worry, I'll drink some first, and you drink the rest. We'll fall asleep soon."

Looking at someone who has basically closed his eyes, Ron who almost didn't snore: "..."

"Dude, since you have this, you can talk to me." Ron stretched his hand to Harry's bed through the gap between the two single beds, "I believe you must have refreshing medicine."

Harry yawned, "Don't you want to have your wedding in the best shape? Or I'll let Bill and Charlie come over now..."

"Don't—" Ron hurriedly stopped, "They're here, should I go to bed?"

Harry couldn't even roll his eyes at this time, "You know it too. No, I really need to go to sleep. I corrected the homework of the students last night, and I did it all day again today. You don't want your best man to be sluggish tomorrow, do you?" He could Refreshers, but the groom is better off, right?

Ron sighed, "Oh, I didn't expect that I would get married tomorrow."

"...you've been preparing for almost a year, don't tell me you're not ready." Many times, Harry would indeed be awakened by one or two points of conversation, for example, now, he could see that Ron was really He was up and down, as if he didn't say something, even if he drank the dreamless potion, the effect might not be much better.

"Of course not," Ron said in a very cold voice, "I didn't expect Hermione to marry me tomorrow!!!"

——Is there any difference in meaning between your sentence and the sentence just now?

"You were meant to be together," Harry muttered. "You've all been together for so many years that you should have gotten married long ago."

"Dude, do you think I'm really going to get married tomorrow?" Ron obviously began to speak incoherently when he said this.

Harry: "..."

He began to doubt whether what he thought before was correct. This person only expressed one meaning over and over again: Am I really, really, really going to get married tomorrow?

——It's better to just pour him the dreamless potion, does it matter?

"Do you remember when we first met Hermione?"

Harry nodded, how unhappy they were with each other for the first time, and then the conflict began to escalate.

"It's a good thing that the troll appeared at that time, and it's a good thing you insisted on saving her," Ron sighed infinitely, "otherwise she wouldn't have played with us."

At this time, thinking about what he said back then, Harry felt that he really didn't want to sleep.

On the other hand, the God of Sleep began to call with a big move, and Harry took a deep breath: "Our friendship was very pure back then."

"It's the same now," Ron said nonsensically. "In terms of friendship alone, the Gryffindor trio is unbreakable."

Sometimes, you have to admit that what Ron said made sense.

"Yeah, unbreakable," Harry whispered.

"Do you want to sleep?"

—He wanted to sleep for a long time.

"Do you remember the chessboard in the first grade? I was knocked out, you and Hermione continued to move forward, and in the end you moved forward alone, and Hermione came back to save me. I think I may have fallen in love with her at that time ..."

Harry: "..."

"What's your expression?" Ron yelled—although Harry was extremely sleepy, the corners of his mouth twitched strangely several times.

"We... obviously saw her differently at the fourth-grade Warriors Ball." Harry couldn't help but expose him, "That's when you realized she was beautiful. If it wasn't for Krum, you would Jealous?" Before that, Ron had never been jealous of Hermione, had he?

"...Brother, to be honest, you actually like her very much, right?" Ron immediately changed the subject.

"I like her, and I like you too," Harry Ming knew that Ron would not be really jealous anymore, but he couldn't help but said, "She is a very good girl, who doesn't like her."

"Anyway, you can't rob me anymore." Ron said triumphantly.

"I never thought of robbing you." He was always insensitive to feelings. When Ginny was with him, she said similar words to him more than once. "You must treat him well in the future."

"You should tell her that."

"We've been through so many things together." Harry sat up suddenly, startling Ron, "It also seems that your happiness is hard-won."

"It's really too much. These ten years may already be worth several lifetimes of others." Ron glanced at Harry with emotion, "Do you still remember that Hermione accidentally drank the compound soup with cat hair in it? Is it the fact that the agent is covered with cat hair? Who can encounter normal people?"

"Then do you remember when you drank mead at Slughorn's and got poisoned when you were in sixth grade? It really doesn't happen to normal people."

Ron: "...Don't you think the most abnormal thing you have encountered? There was a soul fragment on your head before..."

……

So now is the "not normal person" competition, right?

"Let's go to bed. You really have to get up early tomorrow. I even prepared the dreamless potion for you. I'll go to bed first. If you can't sleep for a while, take a sip by yourself."

"Harry? Harry?!" In the dim light, Ron yelled towards Harry's bed twice, but then he heard the voice of his friend shouting shallowly.

"So fast? I haven't finished yet..." Ron said regretfully, he was indeed tossing and turning and couldn't fall asleep.

Someone ended up taking the dreamless potion Harry had given him, and, as Harry said, slept until early in the morning.

When Ron woke up, Harry woke up too, but both looked sleepy.

"Get up soon!" Suddenly, Molly knocked on the door, and a voice came from outside the door, "Harry, Ron? We're about to start getting ready."

It was not yet full light at this time, and Harry drank the refreshing potion in advance to make sure he was refreshed.

The author has something to say: It’s really a coincidence. After writing this part, I suddenly heard the song "You Are Not Really Happy", and suddenly felt that this chapter is very suitable...

In fact, when Mayday released the album "Poems After Adolescence", I still liked "Suddenly Miss You" among the two songs, but tonight I suddenly felt that the song "Happy" seemed to poke my heart more/(ㄒoㄒ )/~~ Listen to it after finishing writing, I almost cried. . .

So the title of this chapter is that you are not really happy

Silently paste the lyrics of this song, you must abuse together, you can't just abuse me...

The crowd is crying you just want to be a transparent color

You'll never have dreams or pain or heartbeats again

you've decided you've decided

You quietly hold back yesterday tightly in your fist

And the sweeter the memory, the more hurtful it is

The more dense and shallow knife cuts are left on the palm of the hand

you're not real happy your smile is just the protective colors you wear

You decide not to hate and you decide not to love Lock your soul in a shell locked forever

The world laughed so you laughed together when survival was the rule not your choice

So you staggered and walked with tears in your eyes

you are not really happy

……

Your wounds never fully heal

Done... this chapter is 6000, finally added

The latest update has been a real pain! ! ! !I just finished writing at 10 o'clock and it will take almost 11 o'clock to update...

By the way, there is another chapter ahead...don't miss it omg, for the sake of my efforts to update, remember to sprinkle flowers on the last chapter too