Dad's Romance

Wearing a white robe, Yu Ziqi stood on the stage and first performed a vulgar repertoire with an innocent tone and expression: The world was born in chaos, and I was born pure.

The monologue is a bit like the voice of the 90s announcer just now.

When the top light on the stage was changed to scarlet, a huge English word - "Lust" slowly fell from the rear projection.

The light was then shot on the "reformed" "Zeus and Io" and "The Abduction of Ganymede".

Lin Yuxian whispered to Zheng Nanshan: "These two paintings have a strong sexual/suggestion, do you understand what Lust is, it is..."

Zheng Nanshan suppressed his forehead and "hush" back with a strong sense of revenge, and continued to take photos.

Audiences with small hearts left early one after another.

I want to live a few more years.

Yu Ziqi was almost insane, he tore his robe from his chest, took it off, and threw it to the crowd like a sacrifice, turning into a beautiful skeleton with only red underpants left, wrapped in a perfect skin that made people feel flustered.

Lin Yuxian squinted his eyes, and listened to the monologue with the theme of "Indulging Desires and Fighting the World" accompanied by long sighs and short sighs from the audience.

Schopenhauer, Shakespeare, and even old Hesse were invited out.

Holding "Spirit and Eros" in his hands, Yu Ziqi chanted a mantra to hypnotize the few audiences who were not scared away.

In the second unit, another English word - "Revenge" was dropped from the rear projection, and the position was moved by following the light, aiming at other oil paintings.

Lin Yuxian hooked his neck back to Zheng Nanshan, and said with a playful smile: "This "Jael and Sisera" with nails on the neck..."

"You shut up."

The top light changed from scarlet to moss green, and then a well-designed humanoid robot stepped on a small wheel and slid to Yu Ziqi's side, and the plot became more and more weird.

The robot stretched out its cast-iron hand, but because it lacked the joints it should have, it could only move straight towards the auditorium, and then slapped Yu Ziqi's side vigorously in a circular motion.

once, twice...

Yu Ziqi's face first appeared with a pink palm print, and then was captured and occupied by the superimposed marks.

The audience in the audience, especially the audience with their own fans, felt like sitting on pins and needles, disregarding the theater discipline, stood up and shouted "Don't, Ziqi" and "Don't you want your face?"

The voice is high-pitched and the language is severe.

The fans only felt that it hurt more than being hit in the face, and they cried "嘿嘤" that Yu Ziqi didn't take to heart at all.

His performance wasn't over yet.

Then there were several units of "Justice", "Killer" and "Fight". Lin Yuxian saw the end, his consciousness was a little blurred, and with a pair of phoenix eyes, he said to himself: "I really underestimated you, disrespect and disrespect, I can live to see the whole scene , can I go to the backstage to get a big red envelope in a while!"

Later, Yu Ziqi held a long flax scroll and sang the adapted "Light White", with an ancient tune, gloomy and wild, and his thin figure was vague and resentful.

On the foggy, green-lighted stage, it looks like a lonely ghost wandering in hell.

There are only a few spectators left in twos and twos.

The rest is definitely true love.

Also shed tears.

The fans are almost gone.

Yu Ziqi looked melancholy, his flirtatious face under the top light had only dark shadows.

He took the white shirt and dark trousers brought by his assistant, and dressed temporarily on the stage without any scruples.

To the few audience in the audience, he said: "I have been reluctant to wash that football sock that you accidentally took off a few years ago, and it was just lying in the closet of my new home. If this is called love, I probably have missed it." for many years."

Yu Ziqi burst into tears and said: "Are you here today? How are you? Do you still remember me? I went to the seafood restaurant where you often eat, and I accidentally saw you on the first floor of the shopping mall... like I was laughed at like a fool, but I dare not say it to you: I was wrong."

Tears appeared in Jiang Wei's eyes at some point, and he left the table abruptly. Before he left, he didn't forget to beat Lin Yuxian, "You wait for me!"

A few seconds later, Jiang Wei vomited like a howling wolf from the exit of the venue.

Zheng Nanshan: "What's wrong with him? I'll go and see him."

Lin Yuxian pressed him down: "No need, probably because he finds it disgusting to hear that Yu Ziqi hasn't washed his socks for several years."

Yu Ziqi sighed a long time on the stage, "The feeling of stepping on the world is better than stepping on the clouds. It's so empty, so empty that if I stretch out a rebellious foot, I will definitely fall from the clouds. Fell into a puddle of mud." He showed his thoughts clearly, "Come back and hug me, please."

There was a curse from the seats on the first floor, "What kind of f*cking drama is this, if it wasn't for my girlfriend, who the hell would waste time watching this rubbish!" He didn't seem to be satisfied, and continued to say loudly: "Get off fans! Off powder!"

Yu Ziqi smiled calmly, directly broke the fourth wall of the theater stage, and yelled at him: "Do I care, get out."

"Get out!" The man stood up from his seat, clenched his fists and left the seat angrily. The long-haired girl next to him looked at her boyfriend, then at the lunatic in the stands, and got up to chase her boyfriend, "Forget it, Yu Ziqi waits." Make up your mind and I will come back to follow you!"

Lin Yuxian rested his chin with one hand, and said with an irresistible smile, "It's really funny!"

Zheng Nanshan was sending WeChat messages, when Lin Yuxian poked his elbow and said confusedly: "Oh, it's beautiful, wonderful, great artist, not bad."

Lin Yuxian: "..."

Yu Ziqi bowed down three times to thank you before the end of the show, as if to show off that he was good at arithmetic, and said: "24 hours a day, 1440 minutes, 86400 seconds, it takes 7 seconds to think about you once a day. If we think about you 12342 times a day, we can We will meet again when the spring blossoms."

Lin Yuxian's mind suddenly buzzed, wait.

Didn't the one in the rehearsal ground rub it recently? "Meet again"?Are there other white moonlights? !

There is also a gold master father...

Wait!Is the person in the rehearsal field the legendary benefactor? !

Not only is Yu Ziqi crazy, but his private life is also too dishonest.

Lin Yuxian had a headache for a long time, watching Yu Ziqi step off the stage, there were only a few sighs left in the theater.

In the last row of seats on the second floor, in the corner, the yellow Yuancun Wu Weiping propped his arms on the back of the front seat, wrapped in a layer of cold and desolate aura, and said with a clear understanding of the world: "Few idiots."

Zheng Nanshan stretched out his foot, kicked Lin Yuxian, who was shaking his head, and asked straightforwardly: "Why put his oil painting on the TV screen?"

"His body is wandering around the world, but his soul is contained in those iron boxes." Lin Yuxian kicked back, pretending to be profound.

Zheng Nanshan grabbed Lin Yuxian up, gritted his teeth and said, "You understand quite well, let me tell you again, Yu Ziqi must stay far away."

"Wait! I'll go to the backstage to see if I can get a big red envelope! Am I not far enough away? So far, I've only communicated with him on WeChat, and I've never seen him in real life! I'll come back as soon as I go."

Before Zheng Nanshan could react, Lin Yuxian had already disappeared from the side platform.

Zheng Nanshan hardened his fist.

In less than 2 minutes, Lin Yuxian turned back, unhappy, with an obviously strange expression, and he didn't even feel the fake hand that Zheng Nanshan had slashed on his head.

He said: "I heard a man in the background slapping his hands, saying 'Who gave you the courage to tell the world that you have the moonlight'."

Zheng Nanshan cast an unfathomable look, as if to say "I told you a long time ago".

He said: "Even a proto-single-celled animal like Paramecium knows to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages, but you are not as good as Paramecium."

Lin Yuxian: "Paramecium? What? Is it delicious? Can it be dipped in millet and spicy food?"

"..."

The sky is broad and the wind is light, and the stars and the moon seem to be spinning overhead.

Lin Yuxian and Zheng Nanshan came to the steps at the entrance of the Drama Center and waited for the driver to drive over.A few young girls who were waiting for an online car-hailing car after the show stood beside them, talking quietly.

"Yu Ziqi is indeed on the trending list again."

"Let me guess, isn't the tag #余子直又疯狂#?"

"No, it's #余子相真疯狂#, and #余子直的白月光留住#, you can see that it's outrageous, and there are too many little female stars who are raving about it. Yu Ziqi's fans scolded them to death?"

"Hey, there's another tag, just below Yu Ziqi, #天百集装设计师生气奇怪#, click in and click in!"

"The set designer of "Wandering the World"? Isn't it tonight... My God! Miemen! Is it real or fake? Lin Yuxian was born in Kunzhou in 1998. When he was 13 years old, he was lucky enough to escape because he went out to buy peppers. There was a disaster, and when I got home, I found that... all the family members were dead?"

"It's a tragedy in the world, but to be honest, although I don't understand it, I can still tell that this Lin Yuxian has two brushes. Oh, it's really pitiful."

The sound of "Lin Yuxian" slipped into the deity's ears like a draft, and he tilted his head and asked Zheng Nanshan in a daze, "You called me? Why did the voice suddenly become thinner?"

Zheng Nanshan put on a meaningful smile, held up the phone in front of him, and said, "I'm giving you this hot search."

Lin Yuxian took the phone in doubt, and opened #余子相真疾了#without concentrating, laughing until his shoulders trembled uncontrollably.

"Idiot, let you read the next one."

Impatiently, Lin Yuxian entered #天百集装设计师生气奇怪#, dragging non-stop in the square in a daze, and then his face became darker and darker.

How come this person... looks like me.

A nuclear bomb suddenly exploded in Lin Yuxian's chest, and he made a blasting sound: "Zheng Nanshan! You must be sick! Who asked you to buy hot search for me! Is this massacre related to me?! You want my parents Do you hate me any more?!"

Lin Yuxian threw the phone on Zheng Nanshan's face, took a big step forward, turned around suddenly, pointed at the air with his slender fingers and said: "Zheng Nanshan! You can do it! After this time, I can see you through. What career guidance, what little angels, it's all bullshit! You are just... just..."

Lin Yuxian was overwhelmed by anger, he would be at a loss for words for a while, he sternly passed the driver's Maybach, and walked towards the road outside the drama center.

Octopus-shaped clouds buried the moon, and the darkness on the road stretched endlessly.

"Opportunistic!"

Lin Yuxian finally thought of words, turned around and said violently.

Zheng Nanshan took out the gold-rimmed glasses from his pocket and put them on, staring at Lin Yuxian's back, lightly curled one corner of his mouth, and said, "Let this innocent disaster that happened to others be of benefit to your career." Let’s help. It’s okay, make the best use of everything.”

He called Jiang Wei, who had vomited half of his soul, into the car, glanced coldly at the gate of the drama center, and said softly to the driver, "Let's go."

The author has something to say:

small theater:

2038 years.

Halfway through the talk, Lin Yuxian lost his attention a little and started sending messages to Han Ke.

Lin Xiaoye: I will tell my daughter a story!The silly boy was taken aback when he heard that.

Han Ke: Sick.

Lin Xiaoye: Do you think she can tell which is real and which is fake?

Han Ke: Are you reading my... that?

Master Lin: That's not right!The daughter is so stupid!

Han Ke: Do whatever you want, don't stay tuned all day long.

Lin Xiaoye: Me, me, I miss you.

Han Ke: Which one do you want?

Master Lin: Except for the fourth child.

Master Lin: No!I want the one in three years the most.

Master Lin: I want to listen to music!That's it!

One minute later, Han Ke sent a long voice message:

"Maybe there is another me in this world. He is dreaming a dream that I have never had...I will accompany me whatever I say or do. Please hold me tight, please don't leave me casually. At any moment, I need a ray of light for me Flickering. Myshadow, myshadow..." ["Light·White"]

The voice is thick and pleasant.

Just when Lin Yuxian wanted to roll on Han Ke's voice.

"Ding~"

Han Ke: Get lost.

Lin Zhi suddenly yelled: Dad!I remembered!I want to eliminate Zheng Nanshan first!He doesn't have a left hand, my little dad does!

Lin Yuxian put down the phone and said with a smile: "Silly girl, real hands can be transplanted in 2023, you don't know. Oh right."

He paused, and said cunningly: "His bodyguard may be short of the 500 million."

Lin Zhi: "..."

Lin Yuxian continued to send Han Ke: My daughter is stupid again haha.

The structure of this paper is

"wedge"

"Come, Dad will tell you a story" - the real absurdity

"Little Daddy's Story" - The Absurd Truth

"Lovers in the Sky" - a play within a play, Gu Cheng'an will make a cameo appearance

The third part focuses on the angle of view; the fourth part only has a little bit.

Thank you for watching, bow, and continue to slide and kneel.