nib boy

This year's winter seems to have come very early, and the tail of autumn smoldering disappeared without a trace in just a few days.

The leaves of the old locust tree on the playground have already fallen a lot, and only a few dead leaves hang on the remaining branches, as if the cold wind can be easily attracted by it.

Bai Yuze sat on the window seat and concentrated on answering the math papers. Occasionally, when his thoughts were interrupted, he turned his head and looked outside at the hazy sky.Lead gray clouds covered the entire city, but the oppressive atmosphere did not affect the boy's hopeful mood at this time.

Exams are indeed a tormenting thing. Because of this, Bai Yuze once seriously considered asking Bai Laden to be his teacher, and a second-year-old patient once clamored to destroy the world and so on.But after his master was dismissed, Bai Yuze shrank his neck and went to do his homework honestly.

The reason why it is so painful, in the final analysis, is that I have no bottom in my heart.If he can really break and fall like Yao Lu and Ning Ziyue, that's all right. In fact, the key is to be entangled in his heart and still unwilling.Although Bai Yuze would never admit it, he was secretly competing with the other self that existed in his body.

He is naturally not reconciled.Because no matter what he does, he can't surpass that past self.Since he couldn't surpass it, then he would go against it, at least pretending to be numb would make him feel better.

But now it's different.

The one who was willing to give him courage and support appeared.

The person who silently believed in him and didn't want to see him degenerate appeared.

...the person he likes appears.

"I will show you how good I am. At that time, even if you still want to push me away, I will tell you personally... I want to stay by your side."

The night before the midterm exam, Bai Yuze wrote so solemnly in his diary.

The two-day exam was about to come to an end. At noon on the second day, Bai Yuze walked out of the exam room with a relaxed face and prepared to go to the cafeteria with Xie Zhe and the others. Hum a song.

The corridor was full of students who had just poured out of the classroom as if they were being amnesty. Bai Yuze struggled to squeeze towards the stairs, but on the way he crashed into a car with a person who was going against the flow of the large group.

"Ah, I'm sorry..." Bai Yuze subconsciously apologized, but when he looked up, he was speechless.

Fir Shan only glanced at him lightly, and was about to lift his legs to leave.

"That...wait a minute!" He seemed to have a string of words on his lips, but he couldn't squeeze out a word at this moment.In the end, the person who stopped quietly and looked back at him through the bustling torrent shouted hastily: "After the exam, I will treat you to dinner!"

I want to thank you personally, for letting me muster up the courage to embark on the road that I have abandoned for a long time.

"..."

There are just too many people around.After hearing his words, Leng Shan wanted to tug at the corner of his mouth, but in the end probably couldn't bear the noisy voices and the unceremonious pushing and pushing, so she just replied in a flat tone, "Let's talk about the results after the results are out" before turning and walking away.

Bai Yuze stared stupidly at the spot for a long time before he remembered that Xie Zhe was still waiting for him at the top of the stairs, so he hurriedly leaned sideways and walked forward, this time stepping on several people without bothering to apologize.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When the bell rang for the end of the last subject in the afternoon, Bai Yuze was relieved and at the same time very nervous.But it's useless to think too much now, we can only wait for the results.

When he walked out of the examination room, Xie Zhe was already waiting outside with a smile on his face. When he saw Bai Yuze coming out, he stepped forward and hooked his shoulder. "How does it feel after the half-month auxiliary assault of the first grade?"

"That's it." Bai Yuze shrugged indifferently, rolled up his shoulder bag and walked out with him. "Do you have any carnival plans tonight? I can see the excitement on your face."

"As expected of my beloved concubine, I will love you well tonight."

"...Go away. Shut up if you don't say anything."

As a result, after returning to the dormitory, Bai Yuze found that the beds of the four of them were in a mess, the quilts were randomly rolled up on the floor and put together together, and a bunch of snacks were spread out in a mess.The desks and chairs were all pushed aside, Yao Lu was lying leisurely in the middle of the comfortable floor flipping through magazines, when he heard the movement, he said lazily without even raising his eyelids: "I'm back."

Bai Yuze suddenly went crazy: "What's going on? Are you going to have the rhythm of [-] rounds of mixed battles at night?! Do you know how dirty the floor is ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!"

"Well, calm down... At worst, turn over and go back to sleep." Xie Zhe comforted him without sincerity, and sat down next to Yao Lu to tear off the potato chip packaging bag, and took the half-can of beer from Yao Lu I took two sips. "Xiaobai, don't stand still, come here quickly. What a rare opportunity to indulge in lust."

However, Bai Yuze still stood at the door with a resentful and gloomy black face, until Ning Ziyue came out with a mop and pushed open the bathroom door, looked up at him who was stiff all over, and said calmly, "The floor has already been mopped. Three times."

"Lao Ning!!" Bai Yuze's eyes immediately burst into crystal clear tears, and he rushed forward to hug his thigh without hesitation.

Yao Lu snorted disapprovingly, and turned over a page of the magazine. "Just kidding. With me, a serious clean freak, how could I not have considered the hygienic environment... So Xie Er took off your shoes for me before you come up!"

Xie Zhe, who was kicked out, took off his shoes obediently, but when he was about to step back to the mattress, he was sent downstairs to pick up takeaway by Yao Lu, so he had to put on his shoes again and slam the door away cursing.

It's a rare relaxation, but in fact they didn't do much that night, they just drank beer and had a meal together, and played a pseudo-literary French movie on Yao Lu's iPad... Of course, they didn't watch half of it. It has become a crude film, and the source of the film is kindly sponsored by classmate Xie Zhe.

This was the first time that four people watched this kind of thing together. Bai Yuze felt a little awkward, and from time to time peeked at the reactions of the other three on the way.Xie Zhe's expression was the same as last time without any emotional ups and downs, and Ning Ziyue was similar to him, even calmer.Yao Lu said with a disgusted face that this was the first time he saw this thing, and he would never touch it again, disgusting.

Surprised by the peculiar physical structure of the young men around, but Bai Yuze himself is not hard at all, so he didn't say much.

It was gradually getting dark, and Yao Lu ordered Xie Zhe to go to the door to turn on the light. Xie Zhe was too full to move at the moment, so Moji had a whim for a long time and said that he could just turn off the light and play the truth Take a big risk.

"Boring, how old are you, a second-year middle school student?" Bai Yuze expressed contempt for him.

"Forgive him, his brain development can only stay at that stage." Yao Lu sympathetically changed her position and lay on her side, propping her head on one hand. "It's time to exercise with him physically and mentally."

"Then two votes for and one vote against—" Xie Zhe turned to Ning Ziyue with a smile, "Yuan Fang, what do you think?"

"I have no opinion."

"Yoxi-"

Bai Yuze sighed and lay down too, with a tired voice: "Okay, okay, whatever you want."

Ning Ziyue went to the bedside and took out the flashlight, turned it on and placed it in the middle of the circle surrounded by several people, immediately everyone had a strange look on their faces.The atmosphere rendering is ready, and the first round of boxing guessing begins.

Xie Zhe lost in the first round, Yao Lu raised her eyes and smiled charmingly: "What do you choose, dear?"

He couldn't help shivering, he didn't dare to take a big risk with such a ruthless character being beaten to death, so he cleared his throat and said cautiously: "The truth."

"Then—" Yao Lu deliberately drew the tone, with a malicious expression on his face. "Please tell me the shortest interval between ejaculation [ummm]."

"Pfft!" Bai Yuze and Ning Ziyue sprayed beer at the same time, splashing everywhere, and Yao Lu almost got mad at them.

It was rare for Xie Zhe to blush, and he held back for a long time before embarrassingly speaking with the same voice as a mosquito: "...Five or five minutes."

"Amazing..." Everyone sighed in unison, even Ning Ziyue couldn't help showing a look of surprise.

"Thank you, thank you, I've accepted." With a few perfunctory words of "humility", Xie Zhe urged to hurry up to the next round.

This time it was Ning Ziyue who lost, and without changing his face, he chose the truth, and Bai Yuze asked the question.Bai Yuze was quite kind, and asked a conservative question: "Please briefly describe your first love."

Ning Ziyue fell silent, and it was a kind of depressing silence that was different from usual, obviously hesitating and didn't want to say anything.This really scared the other three people, because they thought that Ning Ziyue probably hadn't dated yet.But then he finally spoke up.

"He is thin, with straight hair that hangs just past his chest...he smiles very quietly." He spoke slowly, as if he had fallen into a long memory alone. "Kind, gentle personality...understanding. I've probably never been angry with anyone... In short, he is a very simple person."

The three of them stared at him together in a daze.

"Is she... pretty?" After a while, Bai Yuze tentatively expressed his curiosity.

Ning Ziyue nodded and said nothing.

"What a blessing." Xie Zhe resolutely began to envy and hate again.

Yao Lu sighed, "Following such a paralyzed person is really blind."

The game continued quickly, probably because Xie Zhe's revenge moved the heavens, and after a few rounds, it finally came to Yao Lu's trial.

"Hmm." Xie Zhe pretended to clear his throat, sat upright and said with a sly smile, "Please tell me the object of your fantasy when you masturbated last time."

Yao Lu blinked innocently, with a pure expression on her face: "Huh? But I've never masturbated before."

"What?!"

The room was boiling again, and Xie Zhe grabbed his collar excitedly, his eyes were tearing apart: "Ci'ao!! Are you serious?!"

"Of course." Yao Lu said solemnly, "How can I hand it over to Mr. Right Hand so frivolously for the first time, I have to save it for that destined lover—"

Bai Yuze seemed to be stimulated, and kept pouring himself alcohol while murmuring indistinctly: "It's probably useless..."

"Then do you always ejaculate directly?" Ning Ziyue raised the scale of the question with a calm face.

"To be honest, I seldom want to ejaculate, although I know very well that I am not frigid." Yao Lu said frankly.

"It's a blockbuster. Tell me, do you want to be so innocent in some aspects? Hey! It's not your style at all!" Xie Zhe still couldn't believe it.

"Fuck off, how can you see that I am not innocent." Yao Lu gave him a warning look, then shrank into the quilt complaining and changed the subject: "Hey, Xiaobai, why haven't you lost after such a long time? It’s all about exposing important privacy, okay? No, you have to say something tonight, and then go to bed after talking.”

"Ah? Are you being too blunt? I'm not lucky." Bai Yuze was depressed, and thought about it under the quilt. "It's okay to say, but you and Xie Zhe are too hurt. If Lao Ning has a question, I will answer it."

"Go Ning Ziyue. If the question is not to my liking, the consequences will be serious." Yao Lu yawned after speaking, so that the threat didn't even have half the force.

Without thinking too much, Ning Ziyue said slowly: "Please tell me the name of the person you like now."

Yao Lu and Xie Zhe were immediately dissatisfied and shouted that they were not explosive, they were too moral, but Bai Yuze's heart skipped a beat, and he would rather the question be more open.

He smiled wryly and tried to evade, "...is it fine to drink?"

"No! It's a big deal and I'm keeping it secret. Answer quickly, or I'll kill you right away."

However, Bai Yuze insisted on life and death and refused to say anything. In the end, he was soft and hard, and finally got two cans of amnesty and fined wine.

At the end of that night, he was the only one who was drunk. In a daze, someone undressed him, someone covered him with a quilt, and someone whispered good night in his ear.

Before falling into a deep dream, Bai Yuze suddenly had the courage to open his mouth and murmured "Fir Shan", probably because he wanted to give a belated answer to that question.

But at that time, the other three people beside him had already fallen asleep before him.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When it was almost late at night, the sky that had been cloudy all day finally began to fall with numerous snowflakes.

"...It's the first snow this winter." Before Fir Shan stepped out of the bar, Gu Mingye was quietly gazing through the glass door at the street gradually covered in white, whispering to himself.

Knowing what is the source of his current distraught, Leng Shan just pushed open the door and walked into the snowstorm without saying a word.

...Because I'm already too busy to take care of myself.

The temperature dropped rapidly at night, and the fir tree was already wearing thin clothes. Now the wheels were rolling on the snow and slipping easily. In the end, he had no choice but to get off his bicycle and push it all the way home.

Fortunately, the bar is only ten minutes away from his residence, and it is only a short walk away.

After locking the bicycle in front of the Tongzilou, Fir Shan rubbed her cold and numb hands slightly after stepping into the corridor, and gently brushed off the crushed snow on the top of her head and shoulders.

The room he rented was on the second floor, and it was not difficult to climb up.On the contrary, there are a lot of sundries in the corridor, coupled with the dim light, every time you pass through a corner, you will feel more and more desolate.

There was a stale damp smell in the air, like something moldy.However, he hates being messy and messy, so with the current economic situation, he can only live here temporarily.

Sighing very lightly, Fir Shan raised his head, stopped slowly, and fumbled for a string of cool metal from his pocket.

The key has been inserted [ummm] in, but it has not been turned.

Looking at the rusted iron gate in front of me, the long-lost fear came back—fear of going home, fear of opening the door.

There is a dormant giant beast living in the house, and sometimes Leng Shan even feels that the home is the gaping mouth of the giant beast, waiting for him to step into it, and there will be no redemption.

The beast named Lonely.

It may sound ridiculous.Obviously I chose to be alone, so are you still afraid of being alone?

Some things... are really hard to explain.

When did it start? ...this kind of day.

I have to go back seriously, but I feel that my initial life was like this, and it has continued from the past to the present.

One person memorizes words.Listen to music alone.Do laundry alone.Walking alone on a long street.

A person lights up the lights at home, calls out to the emptiness that I am back, and then hears the echo to greet him.

One person listens to the couple quarrel upstairs, the child cries, and wants to change places with any of them.

Cook alone.Eat alone.

This kind of loneliness has a long history, filled with an ancient taste.

Until they met Bai Yuze, they were like moss afraid of light, retreating all the way to the darkest place in his heart.

But the person who brought him the light, now doesn't remember anything.

There is no past, and now even the most noisy and purest part of my life has been discarded.

So, what is left? ...

Fir Shan held his palm slightly, but only the cold nothingness slipped away from it.

Probably--

After entering the room, he leaned his back against the cold door panel, waiting for his eyes to slowly adapt to the darkness of the room.

--Yes.

——Just like the thick darkness around it... There is nothing, nothing left.

Silently hooking his lips, Leng Shan finally moved his legs to the direction of the wardrobe in his memory, but suddenly a pair of arms stretched out behind him to wrap around his waist, and he couldn't move any more.

"...Why did you come back so late?"

here we go again.That lingering, leisurely voice that sounds annoying.

Leng Shan squeezed her lips tightly, Ren Jinke bit her earlobe wantonly, licked her neck, and said indifferently after a long time: "...let go."

"What if I say no?" The person behind him with a half-smile, hooked the zipper of his coat with one hand while lowering his voice pretending to be mysterious: "Otherwise, I'd better change my taste... I went to the docile and innocent girl How about your little one?"

Without even thinking about it, Leng Shan suddenly turned around and punched the opponent in the face, but Jin Ke didn't even shake his figure.

Turning his face back and raising his hand to wipe away the blood oozing from the corner of his mouth, he smiled nonchalantly: "Hey...you are really cruel, Xiaoshan." Before the young man in front of him who was in a rage spoke again, he slightly She lowered her head and roughly grabbed his lips.

After another fierce fight, Jin Ke finally restrained his movements temporarily, panting slightly short of breath, but his voice was exceptionally calm.

"...Listen, Fir.

"You should hate me, but I hope you understand a little bit. I may even give up my life for you, but if someone wants to snatch you away... I will definitely take his life without hesitation.

"……you are mine."

The snow that was flying outside the window was getting bigger and bigger.And who knows the despair that is roaring in the corner of the city.

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