Are you wearing long pants?

Zuo Buyan woke up in a burst of fatigue.

Didn't he sleep well on the high-speed train last night?How can you be tired.

He opened his eyes in doubt, and met a pair of clear eyes full of longing.From the eyes to the whole face.

"Student Su Jiang?" It seems that the words he heard in the ward were said by Su Jiang.

Su Jiang must have drugged him again, that's why he was exhausted.I don't know how long he has been missing, Pei Ye must be dying of anxiety, and I don't know if Pei Ye can find him.

"Call me Su Jiang," Su Jiang saw him wake up, his eyes lit up for a moment, and then quickly dimmed, "You only call people close to you by name."

Watching Su Jiang's every move, Zuo Buyan remembered a word his mother once explained, which is called Bingjiao.

Sick and squeamish, paranoid and arrogant.

Zuo Buyan spoke out Zhasu Jiang's heartfelt words in his usual flat tone: "But we are not close."

Su Jiang's ice-like and snowy fingertips slid gently across his face, Zuo Buyan wanted to hide and tilt his head, but he didn't have any strength at all.It's a terrible feeling to be involuntary.

"Why aren't we close? I am the person who knows you best in this world. I know you have a small red mole on the left shoulder blade on your back. You like to write stroke by stroke when you write. You like to drink pure water. When you speak I am used to raising my left hand...as long as it is about you, I know it. Do you know why? Because you are my shadow, you were born for me."

"No, I'm not." There was no strength, but Zuo Buyan said this sentence with absolute certainty.For more than four years, he also thought that he was Su Jiang's shadow hiding in the dark, he would never be able to surpass Su Jiang, and he would always be the object of being brought out to say what a pity.But after meeting Pei Ye, he realized that those were all self-righteous labels imposed on him by others.

He left nothing to say, he never lived for anyone, and he was never someone's shadow, he was his own light.

"No! You are! You are my shadow! You swallowed and contained my pain, and gave me enough strength to fight against this world."

Zuo Buyan doesn't swear, but at this moment he also wants to scold him severely.What kind of crazy idea is this?

"It's not that I swallowed and contained your pain, it's you who tortured me to gain happiness."

Zuo Buyan thought many times why Su Jiang treated him so badly even though he and Su Jiang had nothing to do with each other.Later, he gradually understood that Su Jiang regarded him as a container of pain, and Su Jiang transferred his pain to him.

Su Jiang smiled softly, like a ghost: "Because you are really beautiful when you are in pain. I like to watch you jump between doubting yourself and believing in yourself in pain. I like to see you clearly want to make friends with other people. But I can only walk alone, I like to see your fragile beauty pretending to be strong. It’s really puzzling, a fragile rose can survive in the arid desert.”

"Why?" Zuo Buyan was provoked by his pathological speech, and wanted to ask everything, and wanted to know the reason for his mental torture in the past four years.

"what?"

"Why did you find me as your shadow?"

Su Jiang's fingertips ran around his face, stickier than the poisonous snake Nobuko.

"Because you are the source of my pain. You said that I transferred the pain to you, but it is not true. You are the source of my pain."

"I don't understand." Zuo Buyan really didn't understand, he had very little contact with Su Jiang, how could it bring him pain.

Su Jiang smiled, very similar to his usual elegant and fresh disguise: "You always go to a cram school after school in primary school, and there is a Taekwondo gym next door. Remember?"

Of course Zuo doesn't remember.Has Su Jiang known him since then?

Su Jiang fell into the memory, the memory that he often brought out to savor: "At that time, I was learning boxing in that taekwondo gym, and I thought that my peers were very naive and funny, until I saw you, little person Carrying a schoolbag, I go to the cram school by myself on time every day. I really want to make friends with the children in the Taekwondo gym, but I stand outside the French window and look in every day, but I restrain my desire and memorize it after a few minutes. The schoolbag went away alone without any regrets. At that time, I thought, this child is really different."

"Then I quietly followed you home. Your house lives on the first floor. I can see your room with a telescope in the pavilion. I saw a man who gave you a lot of test papers every day. I saw you sitting there every day. There are test papers one by one in front of a desk. You are like a robot that will not suffer and will not resist. I hate you who have no backbone, but I can't help following you, observing you, watching you The boring life day after day. But there are also differences. Sometimes when you change clothes in the room and the curtains are not closed, I can see the red mole on your shoulder and your waist. Your waist is fine Strange, no abs, thin layer..."

"Later, it seemed that I had become a habit of following you every day. It was so strange. I dreamed of you one night. In the dream, you didn't wear clothes, and you came to hug me and touch me...Since that day From then on, I couldn't help but fell in love with stalking you. Sometimes, when you were doing your homework at home, I would draw pictures in the small pavilion, drawing your appearance in my dreams. I was not so lucky, my pictures were taken by me The family found out."

"My dad was only my son at that time, and he raised me as his heir. He was very angry and sent me to that institution. He said that homosexuality can be cured under the euphemistic name. The doctor there is a pervert, and he said I was a pervert. .Every day I was either electrocuted or hypnotized and drugged. At first I resisted, but then I slowly realized that camouflage is the best way to help me escape there. It took about three months before I succeeded. Trick that doctor and get out of that institution."

"After I came out, they all thought I was fine. In fact, I like to observe you more. I want to lock you up, put you on a beautiful gold chain, and make you the most delicate and beautiful pet. All of you Only I can see the appearance. I have planned everything, just waiting for my wings to be full. I didn't expect..."

Su Jiang sneered: "My dad actually got the second child out, and you transferred to another school without saying a word, and disappeared from the world. I'm going crazy."

"It's a good thing I finally found you."

"Zuo Buyan, you can't escape from my palm."

Zuo Buyan is digesting the past from Su Jiang's perspective, everything is like this.

"I still don't agree with your idea. Although you have encountered bad things, the root of all this is not me, but you, your family, and secular prejudice."

Su Jiang condescendingly leaned over and stroked Zuo Buyan's forehead hair, wishing to tie him up with his own breath.

"It doesn't matter anymore. All I know is that you are mine now. You are the best birthday present I can give myself."

Zuo Buyan couldn't move, he watched Su Jiang undo his collar first, and then his clothes.The down jacket that Pei Ye gave him was stripped off.

With Pei Ye gone, Zuo Buyan was scared.

He really couldn't grasp or imagine what would happen next.

"Su Jiang! Let me go!" Zuo Buyan emboldened himself by shouting Su Jiang's name, and also hoped that his terror would be able to summon Pei Ye.

"Zuo Buyan." Su Jiang slowly called Zuo Buyan's name, sliding his fingertips over his fragile Adam's apple, and brushing over his clear and proud collarbone.

"Let me see that red mole." Su Jiang turned his left side and made him lie on his side.

Zuo Buyan had no strength, he couldn't even close his collar, and blushed in the struggle: "Su Jiang! Let me go! I'm not as numb as you think! I committed suicide too! I'm not resigned I can't figure out why the pain came to me! Why are you doing this to me! If you really dare to do anything to me today, I will commit suicide! Die!"

"What?" Su Jiang turned him back violently, checked around for suspicious places on him, and was crazily suspicious: "No, no, you lied to me... How could you commit suicide? How could you be so capable?" Shinobu... I saw your father beating you, but you didn't make a sound..."

Zuo Buyan sneered, at this time, he was not afraid of angering Su Jiang, so he said something: "Look, you are the source of my pain. You know that I am being beaten, but you just stand by and watch. In the end, you still blame me, blame me In your dream, blame me for making you gay. Su Jiang, you are so unfair."

I don't know which sentence poked Su Jiang's switch, Su Jiang cried.Transparent teardrops hit Zuo Buyan's cheeks and eyelashes all over the place.

"It's not like this, it's not like this...I actually love you and want to protect you...or you can torture me, as long as you are willing to be with me...I'm sorry...I really love you, I I avenged you, I know you wanted to beat your father since you were a child, and I beat you for you..."

It turned out that it was Su Jiang's fault that his father's accident happened this time.

Su Jiang was so crazy that he couldn't express his words and spoke nonsense.

Zuo Buyan was dazzled by his tears, and his eyes were also astringent. For a while, he couldn't tell whether Su Jiang's tears were saltier or his tears were more bitter.He thought to himself, maybe Su Jiang had already forgotten what his earliest thoughts were.Time can make people forget everything, and it can also make people more stubborn and extreme.

Su Jiang has traveled a long way on a radical road, and he has long lost sight of where he came from and where he was going.

Zuo Buyan let Su Jiang lie on him, crying, biting, tearing...

"Bang! Boom!" "Bang!"

With a few loud bangs, the door fell down.

There were clothes all over the floor, Pei Ye didn't care about anything, rushed over and pulled Su Jiang down who was lying on Zuo Buyan, pressed him to the ground and punched him a few times.No matter where it hits, it's just a random smash anyway.

A young man in a suit came over to stop him: "Student Pei, you should take a look at your classmate first. I will take care of it, young master."

Pei Ye threw the bruised and swollen Su Jiang on the floor like a rag doll.

"Take him out! I hope you will do what you say."

"Of course." The young man supported the weak Su Jiang, straightened his head, and completely tore away his sight of looking to the left.

Pei Ye went on a rampage but couldn't find a crack to vent. He covered Zuo Buyan's messy marks with a quilt, and held Zuo Buyan tightly in his arms.

Gently combing Zuo Buyan's messy hair with big hands: "It's okay, Little Swan, it's okay, as long as you live, it's okay, it's okay..."

Pei Ye tossed a few words over and over, his expression was absent-minded, Zuo Buyan probably knew what he was thinking and what he was thinking about.

"Pei Ye," Zuo Buyan said hoarsely, "I'm fine."

"You're fine, of course I know you're fine, my little swan will never have an accident."

"I mean, Su Jiang can't be tough."

Pei Ye:!

"Is he worse than me?"

Zuo Buyan couldn't laugh or cry, Pei Ye seemed a little strange about his position.