As your white moonlight, I don't want to fall off the horse

Recently, Xia Mushu's spirit has not been very good. Although Gui Luan seems a little strange at the moment, he has not experienced opening his mouth to ask anything.

However, the relationship between the two, from before to now, has never belonged to the category of heart-to-heart communication, and it's nothing if you don't ask.

Although Mei Yingze also felt a little strange, but in his capacity, it was not easy to ask anything, so he could only lower his head silently and did not speak.

Gui Luan didn't say anything else, just smiled and turned to leave.

Mei Yingze looked down at Xia Mushu, and was about to say something when she frowned slightly.

"What's wrong?" Xia Mushu asked.

"I always feel that the topic just now has not been finished, and Gui Luan has diverted it elsewhere." Mei Yingze said.

Xia Mushu smiled slightly: "Not bad, anyway, he still went around, if he didn't even know how to say it."

After a while, Gui Luan entered the room again, but Mei Yingze was stunned. He had been here in Yunxiu for a long time, and he had never seen Xia Mushu's bloodletting, so he thought it might be a small bowl every time.

"This..." Mei Yingze asked in surprise, "Full?"

"No, he doesn't have so much blood on his body now." Gui Luan said casually, "Although I really want to fill it up."

Xia Mushu frowned slightly: "Brother Yingze, can you go out?"

"No, I'll stay with you, I won't talk, and I won't feel bad, okay?" Mei Yingze said.

Mei Yingze knew that if he didn't say that, Xia Mushu would definitely not let him stay. He just didn't have the energy to reject him too much now, otherwise it wouldn't be strange to throw himself out.

Xia Mushuben wanted to say something more, but seeing that Gui Luan had already lowered his head to wash, he didn't say anything more.

The wrist was cut open, and the blood now is not like it could stay in the past, it can only drip down drop by drop, getting slower and slower.

Mei Yingze didn't even dare to breathe harder, for fear that Xia Mushu would hear her and drive herself out again, but the pain in her heart became heavier and heavier.

After so many times of bleeding, and so much more every time, the body will become colder and colder after losing the blood, and how can the younger brother Mu Shu, who is already afraid of the cold, bear it?

But the hand holding Xia Mushu didn't dare to use any force at all, for fear of hurting him, so he could only carefully hold him in his arms.

Gradually, Xia Mushu's consciousness became blurred, and his head slowly tilted down. Mei Yingze carefully supported him with her hands, trying to make him as comfortable as possible.

The blood dripped very slowly, and every time you could hear the crisp sound of water droplets, every time it hit Mei Yingze hard on the heart.

Feeling powerless, I can't do anything, I can only drag him like this and give him some warmth.

At this time, Gui Luan looked up at Mei Yingze, and said slowly: "Actually, you still don't know him well enough. You know a lot about many things, and he is very good at persuasion."

Mei Yingze frowned slightly: "I think I know him quite well."

"Not enough. If you really understand, you can persuade him to agree to plant Gu. Instead of being stuck like you are now." Gui Luan shook his head and said.

"Think about him more than yourself, or substitute yourself for him, after all, you are not him."

Mei Yingze didn't speak, just looked down at the person in her arms, and then looked up at Gui Luan: "Please enlighten me, senior."

"Think about his experience. His family was ruined and he was homeless for more than three months. For such a young child, what was he most lacking at that time?"

Mei Yingze wanted to talk about money, but knew it would not be such a superficial thing: "Love?"

"No, it's a sense of security." Gui Luan smiled, and continued: "Although I saved him later, I never gave him this thing.

So he can only live strong, and these strengths are imposed on himself by himself, do you understand? "

Mei Yingze seemed to understand somewhat, but not particularly, so she shook her head slightly.

"That is, he relies on himself for everything, suffers all hardships by himself, fears to swallow all by himself, and all unwillingness and humiliation can only be overcome by himself.

He is independent enough, but also lonely. "

Upon hearing this, Mei Yingze lowered her head and kissed Xia Mushu's forehead: "Well, he suffered a lot."

"And do you know what such a person likes to do most? He likes to push people who treat him well." Gui Luan said looking at the dripping blood.

"Why?" Mei Yingze was a little puzzled: "Be nice to him, isn't it good?"

"Because he doesn't know how to face you, and he doesn't even know how to treat you well. I haven't taught him these things, after all, I don't understand them very well.

How to love someone, how to treat others well, how to communicate with others, even if he knows some of these, the Xia family taught him, but at that time he was just a child, and what he felt and learned was definitely not enough.

So now he should still be a child deep in his heart, but he has grown up, so when he faces these things, he will panic even more than when he was a child. "

"He is deeply afraid that if he wants too much, you will think he is not sensible; if he gives less, you will think that he is not good enough for you; he is deeply afraid that he will drag you down, and one day you will regret it. It's all wrong; I'm afraid that one day you don't want him anymore, how can he get back what he gave out; I'm afraid that I owe you, there is nothing to repay, and I'm afraid that I'm not worthy of you, so that you will bear stains and be unable to raise your head .

He was too scared! "

Gui Luan sighed deeply, "These years, he has been living carefully, no matter how much he suffers with me, it is not too much to break his teeth and swallow it into his stomach. He is actually not afraid of these things, because all of them It is controllable, as long as he perseveres.

But when these hardships are for others to suffer, especially you, brother Yingze who he cares most about, he doesn’t know how to deal with it, he doesn’t know your willingness, or in other words, even if he knows, he still wants to make up for it You, do not want to owe you.

These are all his panics, why didn't you choose to live when you said he was going to die with him? "

Mei Yingze shook her head, but she didn't really understand it. Even though she had suffered a little, in the end it was to survive.

"Because, even if you die, you are still walking behind him, not letting him watch you die. He thinks that when he closes his eyes, he doesn't know anything. Whether you die or not, he doesn't care. Hurt." Gui Luan shook his head and said with a smile.

"Sometimes, this person is also unfeeling."

Mei Yingze didn't speak, because he didn't know what to say at the moment, what Gui Luan said was actually correct, and he didn't completely understand it, but the way of thinking about the problem seemed to be wrong.

I thought it would be enough to stuff myself into Mu Shu's life, but I didn't know that his life couldn't be squeezed in easily by myself. Can't squeeze in.

"Then what should we do?" Mei Yingze asked helplessly.

"If you ask me, I will say, let him become more confident, but how to make him more confident, I don't know, after all, I never thought of making him confident.

But it's not right, after all, he is also very confident in some aspects, but when it comes to you, all these seem to disintegrate, and I don't know why. "

Mei Yingze remembered that Xia Mushu had asked herself before, what if she didn't want him anymore?At that time, I felt a little ridiculous, how could I not want him.

But after hearing Gui Luan's words today, Mei Yingze felt that she was wrong. This was the deepest fear in Mu Shu's younger brother's heart, but at that time, she didn't try to fill up this fear.

It's useless to believe in yourself, but brother Mu Shu also needs to believe in himself.

So the self who can make him ask that sentence is actually not doing well enough, not doing enough.

"However, in fact, I think there is no difference between dying together or living together?" Gui Luan said again.

"No, it's different. Although it is said that there will be life after life, who can guarantee that there will be? If you don't grasp it in this life and place your hope in the next life, you may actually miss it forever." Mei Yingze looked at Xia Mushu's said the face.

"Even if people really have souls after they die, don't they still have to go to the underworld and drink Meng Po soup? What if I drink it and forget my younger brother Mu Shu? Or my younger brother Mu Shu forgets me, what should I do?"

"Actually, I don't want much. It's good for two people to be together for one more day. When we talk together, he smiles at me, or lies in my arms, so that I can hug him well." , and then touch his face and let me kiss him, I think it's worth it."

Every time Mei Yingze said a word, she lowered her head and made a movement, her eyes were full of tenderness and affection.

Seeing this scene, Gui Luan narrowed his eyes slightly, and actually felt a little envy in his heart: "Ask what love is in the world, and teach life and death. It's actually quite good for you to do this."

Upon hearing this, Mei Yingze asked, "You have been saving your junior brother, did you also..."

"No." Gui Luan said firmly: "There is not only love in this world, it is love."

Gui Luan glanced at the wrist that was still dripping blood, then looked up at Mei Yingze: "The impermanence of the world is like this, there are too many things in this world that cannot be controlled, just like me, when I went out of the mountain, I found I'm really good, but so what, am I still unable to keep my junior brother?"

"Alas..." Gui Luan sighed deeply: "I've been with you a lot recently, and I don't want to come by myself."

"How could I be so sentimental in the past. But because of this, I thought, if I open it again, will I let Xia Mushu practice the double body of medicine and poison?

I might raise him well, every time I see him, I will think of my junior brother, although I am about the same age, but my junior brother is raised by me, just like Mu Shu. "

Gui Luan seemed to remember something suddenly, and suddenly stopped talking, just staring blankly at Xuepen.