Your heart's desire

After returning to the Lin Mansion, Lin Ying became seriously ill. A heavy rain poured through his body in this cold winter weather. He was not in good health at first, but since then, his condition has become worse.

He no longer remembered how he returned to the Lin Mansion. On the edge of the cliff that day, he wailed and felt a sudden darkness in front of him, and he passed out immediately. When he woke up, his surrounding situation had already changed.

Lie in bed like that for three to five days, Lin Ying was deeply depressed, except for three meals a day, he never got up from the bed, and refused to say a word.

The Lin family suddenly lost two masters, Luo Yan told Ding Xiang to dismiss half of the servants and maids, and personally cook medicine and serve meals for Lin Ying, just like Lin Ying served him that day.

And often after the meal was delivered, I had to stand in the room for a while looking for needs, trying to make Lin Ying happy in different ways, and by the way persuaded him to mourn.

But no matter how he tried his best, Lin Ying just lowered his head and silently picked up the rice, completely turning a blind eye to it. After eating, he put the bowls and chopsticks on the side of the bed, and fell asleep.

He usually likes to be quiet, but when he was still in Jiangnan, Chi Pin knew his preference, although he was a bit noisy, he tried to avoid him as much as possible.

Later, the two of them made it to the list, and He Jian moved here. This peaceful day was completely broken.

How can this person be a master of hindsight, he likes to say and do things as he pleases, he has been here for a year, and he has caused a lot of trouble.

Lin Ying usually took the opportunity to talk him up, but then Chipin followed He Jian and started messing around, and it became an irresponsible thing. He didn't say anything, and gradually got used to it. A noisy and lively scene.

Now lying on this couch and listening carefully to the movements in this courtyard, not to mention the quarrel between He Jian and Chi Pin, even the random bickering among the servants on weekdays, and the steward scolding those who did something wrong There was no movement of the girl either.

He closed his eyes, and the scenes of the past kept appearing in front of his eyes. Compared with the silence now, it was so sparse that one just wanted to shed tears.

The towel on the pillow was wet once, and it was faintly damp. After a day, it would be dried by the warmth of the room, but it would be wet again at night.

He often even sleeps whole during the day, and then stays in a daze and babbles all night with his eyes open. His whole body is first haunted by ghosts, which is daunting.

After a few days like this, Luo Yan thought that he was sad, so it would be good to let him stay for a few days. After a while, the sad emotions will be diluted by the days, and it will be fine. .

Who thought that the days of silence would come to an end, but suddenly became crazy again, replaced by getting drunk all day long, pretending to be crazy, and talking nonsense.Drink several altars a day, sleep when you are drunk, drink again when you wake up, and so on.

Luo Yan couldn't stop it several times, so he found a hammer and smashed all the wine jars in the wine cellar.

Lin Ying woke up the next day, stood in the wine cellar smelling of wine, stared at the broken porcelain scattered all over the floor, stood there for a long time, and then was pulled by the collar of Luo Yan to the edge of the corridor to that room.

In the room where the hot water has been put, when the door is opened, the water mist inside seems to have been accumulated for a long time, rushing out frantically, rushing towards the face, making it difficult to distinguish reality from a dream.

Lin Ying didn't have a clear vision, but felt that Luo Yan, who was in front of him, suddenly turned around, put his hands on his shoulders, and pressed his face into the water with all his strength, and then followed With a push from the side of the thigh, the whole person fell into it.

"Lin Weizhi, take a look at your current appearance, and then smell your body, what is the difference between you and a dead person now!"

The voice was vigorous and powerful, and every word was extremely clear.He lifted his face up from the water, only spit out the water that he swallowed half a mouthful just now, his expression was still unusually indifferent, he raised his eyes, and looked at Luo Yan with those misty eyes.

Who is this person in front of me?Is it the person Chipin said that he can ignore everything and just want to be with him?

He opened his eyes and suddenly wanted to see clearly whether the person who was muttering in his ear every day had a face like a fairy or not, he had already forgotten what that face was like.

He moved his head slightly forward, opened his eyelids and finally saw clearly.On that beautiful face, it was like an alluring appearance made by an incomparable painter in the city.Mr. Pianpian is lonely and charming, too beautiful to behold.

It was this face that pounced on him at the moment when all swords were fired, and saved his life.

"You're right. I should be a dead person now. It was you, a living Bodhisattva, who saved me. I, Lin Weizhi, should be grateful to you and give you my life!"

He turned the corner of his mouth to the side, his face was full of contempt, and his head was dizzy for several days, as if everything else had been cleared except for the delay in hiring.

Luo Yan frowned and stood beside the barrel, looking at his disgusting face, he wished he could slap him with rounded arms.

He had forgotten how he had treated him these past few days, and now Lin Ying only had one thing in his mind, and that was the delay in hiring, which was all Luo Yan's fault.

Luo Yan stepped forward, made a sound from the soles of his feet, and said slowly: "Don't you just blame me for not letting you die for Chipin, Lin Weizhi, you can die for him, why don't you want to die for him?" I survived. Just for me, do such a simple thing, can't you do it?"

In a moment of excitement, he bent his body down along the edge of the barrel, and then his forehead easily touched Lin Ying's.

There was only a short distance between the eyes, and after speaking, he looked at Lin Ying in a daze, Lin Ying immediately put away the expression on his face, and swallowed a mouthful of saliva.

"Move your body away!"

He didn't move, just spoke lightly, as if making a threat.

The anger in Luo Yan's eyes grew deeper and deeper, "What are you doing, Luo Qingshan, stop!"

Lin Ying struggled as hard as he could, flailing his hands vigorously in the water, and the water he picked up fell all over the floor, and he could only feel warmth and comfort as he floated up and down.

"I sent people to search for them, but I didn't find the bodies of the two of them at the bottom of the cliff. They, perhaps, didn't die!"

The situation of mutual confrontation intensified, Luo Yan suddenly put his lips close to his ear, and as soon as he made a sound, Lin Ying immediately froze in place, only staring at Luo Yan with a pair of eyes.

"Really?"

While he was no longer struggling, Luo Yan hurriedly struck, revealing his clearly outlined collarbone, and his flat lower abdomen, and he could occasionally feel the warmth that was comparable to the temperature of the water.

"Weizhi, tell me, do you never have me in your heart!"

He threw the soaked and sour-smelling clothes far away with his arms;

After hearing this, Lin Ying seemed to have finally regained some sanity, the other emotions in his eyes were gone, and there was only a faint sense of guilt, letting Luo Yan do what he wanted;

"Qingshan, I was wrong, I was wrong."

Luo Yan's eyes widened suddenly, and under Lin Ying's endless entanglement, he finally responded, and then became more like a madman. Lin Ying freed his hands, and in the wooden barrel that could accommodate two people, The warm water slowly covered the chest, and then overflowed the ground along the edge.

After Lin Ying cleaned his body, the two of them moved out of the bucket. Finally, Luo Yan couldn't bear it any longer. He hugged Lin Ying violently, and pressed him to the only square table in the room. On top of that, he was afraid that his waist would be rubbed with scars, so he picked up his own;

One side of the tears were trembling and hit Lin Ying's slightly red waist.

"Wei Zhi, although it may be useless for me to say this, I still want to tell you that if you can live a good life, even if you have nothing, you still have me!"

When Luo Yan said this, for some reason, he suddenly remembered his father many years ago.

His mother died early, and his father was too strict these years, so he developed his rebellious nature.Once he made a mistake and broke a jade bracelet made by his father and given to his mother.

That night, his father used a hemp rope as thick as his wrist to drop him on the short-necked tree in front of the eaves, and whipped him so young at that time with a leather whip. He didn't even cry. Drop it, because his mother said that if you make a mistake, you have to pay the price.

Over the years, there have been countless assassinations.The emperor seized the clue several times and wanted to put his whole family to death, but no matter how hard and tiring he was, he gritted his teeth and endured it.

Now he suddenly discovered that the few times of weakness in his life seemed to be given to Lin Ying.

Lin Yingben hummed in a low voice, and when his body stopped, he suddenly fell silent. Lying on the table, he suddenly felt his heart tremble, and tears welled up in his eyes.

He asked himself in his heart, if the person who was going to die that day was Luo Yan, would he stand up bravely like that day?

The answer was self-evident, and the corners of his mouth curled up slightly, as if he had suddenly regained the solid armor that allowed him to continue living.

He felt that Luo Yan existed just like Chi Pin, regardless of whether they were superior or inferior.

"Qingshan, as I said, I have you in my heart, you have to believe me. It's just that I put you in the same position as him, and hiring him late is like a younger brother, do you understand?"

Chapter 36.5 Late Hiring Extra Story

When I was very young, my family was a well-known large producer of white porcelain in the south of the Yangtze River.

At that time, white porcelain had already formed a set of unique skills compared to the celadon fired by other kilns.

At the moment, it was just a bold attempt by my father, but he didn't want to be taken back to the palace by the father-in-law in the palace, and then be obsessed by the empress in the palace.

At that time, my parents burned the kiln day and night, and after eight or nine days of work filled the courtyard with all kinds of porcelain, a team of carriages with golden plaques would come and carefully load these porcelains onto the carts. , Then after throwing down a basket of silver, it will walk away.

The people in the neighborhood later saw that my family had made a fortune, and all of them, who were used to rolling their eyes in the past, came to flatter me, with smiles on their faces, and wanted to ask for a good prescription and share the sweetness of my family now.

My father is a sensible person, he knows that the fellow who eats can't lose things, if it spreads, white porcelain is like celadon, everyone can fire it, then there's nothing special about it.

No one cared about this thing, and the new path that was opened up with great difficulty was killed again.

So at that time, although my family was rich, no one wanted to associate with us. In addition, my parents were busy firing kilns and making porcelain every day, which formed my somewhat withdrawn but cynical temperament later on.

In fact, after I grew up, I realized that the source of my spending money like water, and the life of rich clothes and fine food, was all the money thrown down again and again in the basket.

It's just that I was not astute enough, and I still couldn't guess that it was the money in that basket that killed my whole family later.

When I was 14 years old, there was a famine in Jiangbei, a large number of refugees fled from Jiangbei, and the streets in the city were surrounded by people in rags.

But whenever they see a local master, a huge crowd of people will immediately flock to beg.

But in the blink of an eye, if someone is dressed brightly, even the clothes can be stripped off, and he is short of using a knife to commit murder, eating human flesh and drinking human blood.

The world is chaotic. Although there is no war in peacetime, there are too many disadvantages in the country's laws. The treacherous officials in the court are in power, and all of them are so greedy that they want to blow their belly up. It's really a rich family that stinks of wine and meat, and the road is frozen to death reality.

This situation lasted for a few days, and the local county magistrate led several teams to clean up the streets in the city. Those who didn't want to leave, even cut their necks with a knife and died on the spot, and then their bodies were pulled out and thrown away. Feed the wolves on the mountain.

The government forced the people to rebel, and a group of people were forced to go up the mountain, joined the bandit gang and became thieves.In this world, they can no longer receive tolls on the road. In order to make a living, they go down the mountain in small groups several times to look for food.

Later, because of the connection with those neighbors who once wanted to call my father brothers and sisters, the spearhead of the search naturally pointed at us.

One day my father caught a cold and fell ill, my mother took care of him and ordered me to go get medicine from the doctor.

When I came back, the house and the yard were turned upside down, and my parents’ bodies were lying on the ground peacefully, with blood dripping from the corners of their mouths, as if they were about to tear down the entire floor of the house. It's all going to be red.

At the beginning, those relatives all came to the house with hideous faces to beg for money, but my father refused all of them, and now he is unaccompanied.There was only one aunt in her early twenties left. At the last moment of his death, my father told me to join her.

My aunt is currently working as a concubine in the government's house. When my father's business was suffering miserably, she once gave money to help my father build a porcelain kiln. Later, when my family became rich, she came to ask my father to be a matchmaker for her. His family background is the bottom line, and he enters the official family to eat and drink hot food, and he no longer has to worry about making a living.

I hastily buried my parents, and bought the guard of the official house with a tael of silver that my father barely saved, and asked him to pass a letter to my aunt for me.

After waiting for a while, the guard came out with half a bag of silver and threw it to me, without a word of gossip.

At that time I hated her, I hated her for being a person who forgot her old kindness when she got rich. Until later, I was adopted by a gentleman named Jin. Before the winter and summer cycle of life, I could smell my aunt, because at the beginning she secretly The half bag of money that was given to me was beaten to death in the house.

I lived in fear for countless days, always afraid that the official would follow the guards of that day to find me, and take my life along the way.

But then I figured it out, maybe the guard must have seized money from my bag at the beginning, and if I confessed, it was just causing him trouble for nothing.

I have tasted the sinister human heart twice, so I am extremely afraid of strangers in my heart.

In school, I tried my best to keep quiet and not cause trouble, and to protect myself wisely, it went smoothly.

It's just that I have always wondered why all these miserable fates fell on our family.

Until I met Lin Ying.

It was the seventh night of staying in the Jin Family Academy. When Mr. Jin came back from outside, he brought back two ragged little dolls who were about my age.

At that time, I was sitting at the door in a daze, waiting for Mr. Jin to come back and bring some food.But I saw that the male doll was wearing a pair of blue and white women's shoes, the shoes did not fit well, and it was very funny to walk awkwardly.

He seemed to have been frightened a lot, his eyes were wide open, and he curled up slightly beside the doll, as if he was always guarding against any sudden danger around him.

"who are you?"

I tilted my head, it was the first time I spoke to anyone other than Mr. since I called this academy.

"Lin Ying!"

At that time, there was not a single speck of flesh on his small face, and he was as skinny as that girl doll, with a pair of very protruding eyes, blinking up, shining very beautifully, and talking to me cautiously.

Later, I put this doll in my heart.

I have also thought countless times that the reason why I will be so close to Lin Ying in the future seems to be because that night, I finally realized from him that there are many people in this world who are more miserable than me.

It also seems to be because I have never seen such clean eyes as his, so I really can't bear him to be hurt in the slightest.

I don't have any big ambitions, but Lin Ying does.

He wholeheartedly wanted to be an official and climb to a high position. At the beginning, he just used all the power he could to find his parents.

Later, there was another purpose of this wish. He told me that he wanted to give Mr. Jin a better life.

Many years later, when I stand at the end of this life and look forward, I can't help but sigh, it seems that this life is really a script written early in the morning, and the hands that control us decorate us. Yi Fen Dai, and then rushed to the stage one by one.

In the following year, the weather in the south of the Yangtze River changed suddenly, and Mr. Jin also fell ill.In order to change his food, Lin Ying rushed into the frozen lake in the cold winter. When the girl who came with him, that is, the sister of the Lin family, found him, his whole leg was completely frozen.

The doctor said that if it is not treated in time, the legs will no longer be able to walk on the ground for the rest of the life.

In order to collect the medical expenses for him, the sister of the Lin family had a wrong idea and went into the local county magistrate's mansion to steal money, but she didn't want to be caught and beaten half to death, and then sold to another place as a slave to pay off the debt .

Things happened one after another. At the beginning, I could barely avoid it, thinking that they would be the ones who would support me if the sky fell.But at that moment, when all hope was on me alone, I panicked.

I was restless and searched all over the city for a job that could earn money. Finally, in a restaurant, the boss drove me out with a grim expression. I sat on the stone steps in despair and cried, while someone came behind me to help me. Handed a Jinpa.

That person's name is Qin Xiang.

She helped me pay for Lin Ying's medicine in advance, so Lin Ying's leg was not disabled, but after a few days of delay, he was left with the persistent disease of long-haired paralysis.

Because of Lin's sister's incident, Lin Ying also started to study more seriously, day and night, as if she didn't even want her life.

At that time, I asked him: "If one day you found your parents and sister, but found that they were gone, what would you do!"

I admit that I am a little jealous and also afraid. Although his relatives are not around, there is always a chance to return to him.

I was afraid that he worked too hard, and finally found all his relatives, leaving me alone and alone, with no one to love.

But then he really hit the list.

I also never thought that my name and Lin Ying would appear together.It was the girl named Qinxiang who spent money to clear it up for me. She followed me to the capital and found a place called Zuichunlou to continue performing arts for money. She said she wanted me to marry her.

The emperor personally appointed Lin Ying as Shaoqing of Dali Temple, and also appointed me as Zuo Shaoqing.There is another person in this position, that is, You Shaoqing at that time, why not.

The strange thing is that this Hejian also said that he has me in his heart and wants to be with me.

I have lived for many years, but I have only thought of Lin Ying in my heart, but I dare not reveal the slightest thought, for fear that he will have a rift with me because of this, and we will never communicate with each other.

But suddenly two people told me that they wanted to be with me, and I was a little dumbfounded for a while.

Later, I thought of a two-way plan, agreed to be with He Jian, and then used He Jian's money to pay off the money owed to Qin Xiang.

It's just that this strategy has not yet been realized, and one day things changed again.

Qin Xiang killed her.The boss of the gambling house in the city became ill-intentioned towards him, and she refused to do so, and immediately broke his head when she touched the candlestick.

I came by coincidence and helped her dispose of the body, but I was unlucky, I didn't notice He Jian and followed me when I went out.

He Jian is really stupid. After the incident was exposed, he immediately stood up and took the blame for me.

I went to prison to persuade him, telling him that I was only doing it for his money, and he didn't need to do this, but he told me that I was willing to delay the employment.

I didn't realize that I was actually in love with him a long time ago.

After explaining all this to Lin Ying, I went to Shuntian Mansion Yin alone to plead guilty.Claiming that Lin Ying asked me to come here is the last thing I can do for him.

I don't want to think that before I warmed up the prison cell in Shuntian Mansion, he brought someone to rob me early in the morning of the second day.

All my life, I never figured out how I took He Jian's life step by step.

I jumped off the cliff with the arrow in my arms, was stopped by a tree between the cliffs, and then fell into the water and was washed to the territory of the foreign country.