One Hundred Days on an Uninhabited Island
Chapter 122 Island Day 65 Scared
wow -- wow --
The waves beat on the rocks, and the moonlight reflected the shadows in the surging waves.
Jiang Xinran stood at the limit of the tide's reach, staring at the back that was half-submerged by the tide.
Wen Siqi was washing her hands again. After relocating the corpse, she kept staring at her hands and went down to wash her hands after a while.
At noon, they moved people into the cave first, which was the shady place at that time. At night, they moved people back to the rest place on the beach. At this time, the beach is windy and the temperature is not high. Maggots born overnight.
The corpse no longer has to worry about the problem of maggots, but Wen Siqi's problem is getting worse.
Fifteen minutes have passed since Wen Siqi entered the water. During the 15 minutes, Wen Siqi was either washing her hands or staring at her hands. The situation was already worse than that of a person who suffers from hemophobia.
Can't let her wash anymore.
Jiang Xinran put down her bow and arrow, and was about to swim over, when the figure in the darkness suddenly turned around and walked towards the shore.
"What's the matter, why are you looking at me like this?"
As soon as she walked ashore, Wen Siqi saw Jiang Xinran's unwavering gaze.
The moonlight is just bright, clearly illuminating the eyes seen from this distance, how should I say it?It seems to be relieved.
Putting aside the unspeakable worries in her heart, Jiang Xinran expressed her thoughts calmly, "I thought you would calm yourself down as before."
Wen Siqi likes to soak herself in the water to calm down not once or twice. In her current state, Jiang Xinran didn't find it strange to jump into the water to calm down. too big.
After hearing Jiang Xinran's frank thoughts, Wen Siqi was silent for a moment, then smiled again, "Thank you, Miss Jiang, for your concern, but don't worry too much. I know when it's appropriate to calm down and when I feel uncomfortable. I won't make fun of my own life."
"Your sanity is scary no matter how many times you look at it."
It's too scary. It's clear that there are psychological problems, but I can still maintain my sanity and not make harmful and crazy behaviors.
Except that time.
Jiang Xinran stared into her eyes, saw the lifeless stillness floating in those eyes, saw her raising the arrow numbly, and saw the falling blood...
!
Jiang Xinran suddenly came back to her senses with a jolt, and Wen Siqi's smile became even brighter, under which was a clear disgust.
"I don't like this rationality either, but it is me, and it is the most important part of becoming the Wen Siqi you know."
"Since it is the most important part of you, why did you blindly like him at that time? With your rationality, you shouldn't be played with by him."
Judging from Wen Siqi's words and deeds and her information, she is a textbook-style rational in every word and deed, so rational that she looks like a fair and ruthless official in history books.
But such a person is blind for love. When the news of her pregnancy was spread, many people who knew her were incredulous.
Can love really make a rational person lose his mind?
Jiang Xinran never felt how rational she was, so she couldn't understand Wen Siqi's blindness.
"Miss Jiang, remember what I said, it's best to stop being curious about a person, and don't go too deep into it?"
Wen Siqi answered irrelevant questions, she was very resistant to Jiang Xinran's understanding of her, as if she was sure that she would like herself because of it.
This certainty made Jiang Xinran uncomfortable. Whether she would like it or not, Jiang Xinran couldn't say for sure now, but Wen Siqi was sure that she would when she didn't have this possibility.
If you know someone too much, you will fall in love with that person, so will she not be able to understand anyone in the future?Knowing one and liking another, Wen Siqi would have considered her feelings too cheap.
"Miss Wen, why do you always think that I will fall in love with you? Don't you think you are too self-righteous about yourself?"
why?
Wen Siqi was taken aback.
Yes, why are you so sure that Jiang Xinran will fall in love with her because she knows her well?Can't it be other feelings?Or simply want to satisfy gossip?
Also curious, why didn't he have such concerns about Han Tang?
Why……
Of course it was because of fear!
Wen Siqi smiled, and Jiang Xinran's questioning made her face up to what she was resisting in her heart.
It wasn't that she was afraid that Jiang Xinran would fall in love with her, but that she was afraid that after Jiang Xinran fully understood herself, some caring actions out of sympathy or other psychology would make her fall in love with Jiang Xinran.
A person who knows enough about herself, knows what she needs, cares about herself, and is not a blood relative. How many people like this can resist the emotional transformation brought about by her care?
This relationship may turn into a deep friendship, maybe into a brotherhood, but more of it turns into love, and Wen Siqi is sure that her relationship will become the third category.
Because of her, changed.
Jiang Xinran is a sunny, beautiful, and desirable type of person. This type of person is the most irresistible to Wen Siqi now.
Because I can't resist, and I'm afraid of becoming hopeless, so I dare not approach, but I can't control the approach and change.
This cowardly struggle made Wen Siqi feel familiar. A long time ago, she told someone that there was a coward who was afraid of touching happiness, and now she has become the coward who was once funny!
Don't even dare to pursue the love you yearn for the most, what is it if you're not a coward?
The smile was full of self-deprecation, mixed with excitement as if she was going to cry in the next second, Jiang Xinran hesitated to speak.
In the next second, Wen Siqi calmed down again, so fast that Jiang Xinran didn't know whether to breathe a sigh of relief or feel distressed.
"Miss Jiang, I apologize for the malicious speculation I made against you before, and I am very sorry for causing you trouble. I assure you that similar situations will not happen again in the future."
The solemn apology pulled the identities away for a while, making Jiang Xinran feel that their relationship has returned to the time when they were killed.
"you--"
Dissatisfaction couldn't help rushing up, but it disappeared in Wen Siqi's eyes that seemed to have lost their luster.
Spitting out her anger fiercely, Jiang Xinran said, "Then, can I understand what you said as that I can continue my curiosity now?"
Wen Siqi opened her mouth, and the words she wanted to blurt out stuck in her throat.
She wanted to say: yes.
but.
"No."
"Why? You don't have to worry about me falling in love with you anymore, do you?"
Looking at each other, seeing the dissatisfaction in Jiang Xinran's eyes because of her rejection, Wen Siqi smiled, "No reason, but I don't want to talk about it."
"You have the right to be curious, and I have the right to refuse your curiosity."
The sea wind blows the waves and makes noise in my ears, as if it is the ridicule of others, it is very ear-piercing.
Wen Siqi wanted to leave here quickly, away from this person who made her unable to calm down even more.
She thought, she took action, took a step and missed Jiang Xinran, said: "It's very late." Then she hurried away with her head down.
Looking at the back of her hastily leaving, Jiang Xinran frowned slightly.
Wen Siqi's mood was very wrong, far less calm than she showed.
What's up with her?
The backtracking thoughts can't help being active and clear.
Surprised, stunned, panicked, self-deprecating... The emotional changes seen in the memories are simply wonderful facial makeup changes on the stage, and in this wonderful change, Jiang Xinran vaguely understands why Wen Siqi is not right.
She was afraid, and also... self-loathing.
Wen Siqi was loathing herself, and this loathing existed for a long time, even before meeting her.
What is she loathing about herself?And what is she afraid of?
The more she thought about it, Jiang Xinran found that the problems became more and more complicated. She didn't understand this one, but that problem came again, and she didn't know how to solve it for a while.
The waves kept beating, and the noisy waves interrupted his thoughts over and over again. Once again, he regained his senses from the complicated problems. The wind blew up randomly, and the chill of night calmed down his mind. Jiang Xinran suddenly felt something was wrong.
Why are you so devoted to Wen Siqi's matter?
Looking at the two bright moons in the distance, Jiang Xinran lowered her eyelids, bent over to pick up the bow and arrow and went back to the cave.
Tonight is the first half of the night when Wen Siqi keeps watch, and now she is sitting quietly by the fire, her sideburns casting shadows on her side face, hiding Wen Siqi's expression.
Jiang Xinran glanced at her, put away the ladder and lay down on the familiar seat.
This day, both the mind and the body were stretched to the limit. As soon as she lay down, she felt exhausted, but her active thoughts pulled her drooping eyelids, and the conflict between her body and her thoughts made her thoughts disturbed. Jiang Xinran tossed and turned and couldn't fall asleep.
Turning over again, Jiang Xinran raised her hand to check the time. After nine thirty, she turned over for a full hour and a half, but in the end she couldn't figure out anything, didn't solve anything, and felt even more irritable.
Covering her face, rubbing her fingers vigorously between her foreheads, her mind was cleared for a moment, and Jiang Xinran took the opportunity to try to fall asleep.
As soon as he closed his eyes, he fell into a dark field of vision and then fell into a maze of confusion, his brows were furrowed for a while.
"Lao Tzu said in the Jing Jing Sutra: My wife is very clear, but her heart is disturbed; her heart is so quiet, but she wants to hold her. Let go of desires and attachments, and the mind will be pure."
The voice of whispering is like playing a flute, although it is clear and pleasant, it is quiet and graceful, just like her.
Jiang Xinran climbed up on the ground, leaning against the rock wall, and glanced at the calm face flickering with light.
Flame is ruthless, it burns everything, but its burning light brings light, and also brings illusory halo, which depicts the romantic haze of what you see.
"Miss Jiang, don't be fooled by the false appearance."
It's a pity that some people are not romantic at all, and Wen Siqi is like a mirror, mercilessly finding out her true heart.
This kind of ruthlessness is very hurtful and repulsive. If she is still the naive self who loves fantasy when they first met, Wen Siqi will definitely not be able to please her.
But people are always changing, Jiang Xinran is unmoved by Wen Siqi's ruthlessness, she just looks at that face slightly distracted.
How long ago, she trembled because of the smile on this face, but now she is calm about it.
I don't know what's wrong, just looking at that face through the light like this, my restless mind quietly calmed down, only caring about that face.
Moving her lower back to make herself lean more comfortably, Jiang Xinran said, "You told me to let go of my desires and attachments, so why don't you let me let go."
"Can't let go."
Wen Siqi didn't think about it, she didn't think carefully before every sentence she usually said.
"Do unto others, do not impose on others."
"So, just a suggestion."
He looked carefully, trying to see what she was obsessed with from the face filled with a faint smile.
Unfortunately, she couldn't see it, but unexpectedly she saw something other than persistence.
Wen Siqi was laughing at herself, and she was also struggling, not the struggle of drowning, she had the ability to come and go freely in the water, but she was struggling whether to leave the water or drown in the water.
And this struggle has existed for a long time, Jiang Xinran thought, the struggle should have appeared when she was abandoned, Wen Siqi wanted to completely drown in the water and get rid of the pain on the water surface, but there was something persistent on the water surface that made her reluctant to let go, just like this, ups and downs... ...ups and downs...still ups and downs.
[I will take her to leave this island safely, and I will also watch her become an adult and find someone worthy of entrustment before leaving]
A sentence suddenly came to mind, when Wen Siqi insisted on looking for the water that flowed into the swamp, she answered her own words.
Suddenly she had a guess that Wen Siqi would struggle until now, and Wen Suiyun was part of the reason, and also the most important reason, once this reason was no longer important, Wen Siqi would probably drown in the water.
A chill suddenly rose up the spine and rushed to the head, freezing his thoughts.
Jiang Xinran shivered and came back from thinking.Turning around, his attention looked over the fire, and immediately fell on Wen Siqi who was opposite.
The flames sway with the flowing wind, shadows and light intertwine on the calm face, light and smile go hand in hand, shadows and weeping go hand in hand.
Her heartstrings trembled suddenly, and Jiang Xinran subconsciously sat up straight.
"What's wrong?"
The soft words are like whispers in the ear, quietly soothing the panicked mind.
Jiang Xinran put away her thoughts, looked away, and wrote lightly: "It's nothing, I've been relying on it for a long time, and my back feels a little uncomfortable."
Like another illusion, Wen Siqi's face was normal, neither smiling nor crying under the firelight and shadow.
It's all just speculation...
No, it's not!
The waves beat on the rocks, and the moonlight reflected the shadows in the surging waves.
Jiang Xinran stood at the limit of the tide's reach, staring at the back that was half-submerged by the tide.
Wen Siqi was washing her hands again. After relocating the corpse, she kept staring at her hands and went down to wash her hands after a while.
At noon, they moved people into the cave first, which was the shady place at that time. At night, they moved people back to the rest place on the beach. At this time, the beach is windy and the temperature is not high. Maggots born overnight.
The corpse no longer has to worry about the problem of maggots, but Wen Siqi's problem is getting worse.
Fifteen minutes have passed since Wen Siqi entered the water. During the 15 minutes, Wen Siqi was either washing her hands or staring at her hands. The situation was already worse than that of a person who suffers from hemophobia.
Can't let her wash anymore.
Jiang Xinran put down her bow and arrow, and was about to swim over, when the figure in the darkness suddenly turned around and walked towards the shore.
"What's the matter, why are you looking at me like this?"
As soon as she walked ashore, Wen Siqi saw Jiang Xinran's unwavering gaze.
The moonlight is just bright, clearly illuminating the eyes seen from this distance, how should I say it?It seems to be relieved.
Putting aside the unspeakable worries in her heart, Jiang Xinran expressed her thoughts calmly, "I thought you would calm yourself down as before."
Wen Siqi likes to soak herself in the water to calm down not once or twice. In her current state, Jiang Xinran didn't find it strange to jump into the water to calm down. too big.
After hearing Jiang Xinran's frank thoughts, Wen Siqi was silent for a moment, then smiled again, "Thank you, Miss Jiang, for your concern, but don't worry too much. I know when it's appropriate to calm down and when I feel uncomfortable. I won't make fun of my own life."
"Your sanity is scary no matter how many times you look at it."
It's too scary. It's clear that there are psychological problems, but I can still maintain my sanity and not make harmful and crazy behaviors.
Except that time.
Jiang Xinran stared into her eyes, saw the lifeless stillness floating in those eyes, saw her raising the arrow numbly, and saw the falling blood...
!
Jiang Xinran suddenly came back to her senses with a jolt, and Wen Siqi's smile became even brighter, under which was a clear disgust.
"I don't like this rationality either, but it is me, and it is the most important part of becoming the Wen Siqi you know."
"Since it is the most important part of you, why did you blindly like him at that time? With your rationality, you shouldn't be played with by him."
Judging from Wen Siqi's words and deeds and her information, she is a textbook-style rational in every word and deed, so rational that she looks like a fair and ruthless official in history books.
But such a person is blind for love. When the news of her pregnancy was spread, many people who knew her were incredulous.
Can love really make a rational person lose his mind?
Jiang Xinran never felt how rational she was, so she couldn't understand Wen Siqi's blindness.
"Miss Jiang, remember what I said, it's best to stop being curious about a person, and don't go too deep into it?"
Wen Siqi answered irrelevant questions, she was very resistant to Jiang Xinran's understanding of her, as if she was sure that she would like herself because of it.
This certainty made Jiang Xinran uncomfortable. Whether she would like it or not, Jiang Xinran couldn't say for sure now, but Wen Siqi was sure that she would when she didn't have this possibility.
If you know someone too much, you will fall in love with that person, so will she not be able to understand anyone in the future?Knowing one and liking another, Wen Siqi would have considered her feelings too cheap.
"Miss Wen, why do you always think that I will fall in love with you? Don't you think you are too self-righteous about yourself?"
why?
Wen Siqi was taken aback.
Yes, why are you so sure that Jiang Xinran will fall in love with her because she knows her well?Can't it be other feelings?Or simply want to satisfy gossip?
Also curious, why didn't he have such concerns about Han Tang?
Why……
Of course it was because of fear!
Wen Siqi smiled, and Jiang Xinran's questioning made her face up to what she was resisting in her heart.
It wasn't that she was afraid that Jiang Xinran would fall in love with her, but that she was afraid that after Jiang Xinran fully understood herself, some caring actions out of sympathy or other psychology would make her fall in love with Jiang Xinran.
A person who knows enough about herself, knows what she needs, cares about herself, and is not a blood relative. How many people like this can resist the emotional transformation brought about by her care?
This relationship may turn into a deep friendship, maybe into a brotherhood, but more of it turns into love, and Wen Siqi is sure that her relationship will become the third category.
Because of her, changed.
Jiang Xinran is a sunny, beautiful, and desirable type of person. This type of person is the most irresistible to Wen Siqi now.
Because I can't resist, and I'm afraid of becoming hopeless, so I dare not approach, but I can't control the approach and change.
This cowardly struggle made Wen Siqi feel familiar. A long time ago, she told someone that there was a coward who was afraid of touching happiness, and now she has become the coward who was once funny!
Don't even dare to pursue the love you yearn for the most, what is it if you're not a coward?
The smile was full of self-deprecation, mixed with excitement as if she was going to cry in the next second, Jiang Xinran hesitated to speak.
In the next second, Wen Siqi calmed down again, so fast that Jiang Xinran didn't know whether to breathe a sigh of relief or feel distressed.
"Miss Jiang, I apologize for the malicious speculation I made against you before, and I am very sorry for causing you trouble. I assure you that similar situations will not happen again in the future."
The solemn apology pulled the identities away for a while, making Jiang Xinran feel that their relationship has returned to the time when they were killed.
"you--"
Dissatisfaction couldn't help rushing up, but it disappeared in Wen Siqi's eyes that seemed to have lost their luster.
Spitting out her anger fiercely, Jiang Xinran said, "Then, can I understand what you said as that I can continue my curiosity now?"
Wen Siqi opened her mouth, and the words she wanted to blurt out stuck in her throat.
She wanted to say: yes.
but.
"No."
"Why? You don't have to worry about me falling in love with you anymore, do you?"
Looking at each other, seeing the dissatisfaction in Jiang Xinran's eyes because of her rejection, Wen Siqi smiled, "No reason, but I don't want to talk about it."
"You have the right to be curious, and I have the right to refuse your curiosity."
The sea wind blows the waves and makes noise in my ears, as if it is the ridicule of others, it is very ear-piercing.
Wen Siqi wanted to leave here quickly, away from this person who made her unable to calm down even more.
She thought, she took action, took a step and missed Jiang Xinran, said: "It's very late." Then she hurried away with her head down.
Looking at the back of her hastily leaving, Jiang Xinran frowned slightly.
Wen Siqi's mood was very wrong, far less calm than she showed.
What's up with her?
The backtracking thoughts can't help being active and clear.
Surprised, stunned, panicked, self-deprecating... The emotional changes seen in the memories are simply wonderful facial makeup changes on the stage, and in this wonderful change, Jiang Xinran vaguely understands why Wen Siqi is not right.
She was afraid, and also... self-loathing.
Wen Siqi was loathing herself, and this loathing existed for a long time, even before meeting her.
What is she loathing about herself?And what is she afraid of?
The more she thought about it, Jiang Xinran found that the problems became more and more complicated. She didn't understand this one, but that problem came again, and she didn't know how to solve it for a while.
The waves kept beating, and the noisy waves interrupted his thoughts over and over again. Once again, he regained his senses from the complicated problems. The wind blew up randomly, and the chill of night calmed down his mind. Jiang Xinran suddenly felt something was wrong.
Why are you so devoted to Wen Siqi's matter?
Looking at the two bright moons in the distance, Jiang Xinran lowered her eyelids, bent over to pick up the bow and arrow and went back to the cave.
Tonight is the first half of the night when Wen Siqi keeps watch, and now she is sitting quietly by the fire, her sideburns casting shadows on her side face, hiding Wen Siqi's expression.
Jiang Xinran glanced at her, put away the ladder and lay down on the familiar seat.
This day, both the mind and the body were stretched to the limit. As soon as she lay down, she felt exhausted, but her active thoughts pulled her drooping eyelids, and the conflict between her body and her thoughts made her thoughts disturbed. Jiang Xinran tossed and turned and couldn't fall asleep.
Turning over again, Jiang Xinran raised her hand to check the time. After nine thirty, she turned over for a full hour and a half, but in the end she couldn't figure out anything, didn't solve anything, and felt even more irritable.
Covering her face, rubbing her fingers vigorously between her foreheads, her mind was cleared for a moment, and Jiang Xinran took the opportunity to try to fall asleep.
As soon as he closed his eyes, he fell into a dark field of vision and then fell into a maze of confusion, his brows were furrowed for a while.
"Lao Tzu said in the Jing Jing Sutra: My wife is very clear, but her heart is disturbed; her heart is so quiet, but she wants to hold her. Let go of desires and attachments, and the mind will be pure."
The voice of whispering is like playing a flute, although it is clear and pleasant, it is quiet and graceful, just like her.
Jiang Xinran climbed up on the ground, leaning against the rock wall, and glanced at the calm face flickering with light.
Flame is ruthless, it burns everything, but its burning light brings light, and also brings illusory halo, which depicts the romantic haze of what you see.
"Miss Jiang, don't be fooled by the false appearance."
It's a pity that some people are not romantic at all, and Wen Siqi is like a mirror, mercilessly finding out her true heart.
This kind of ruthlessness is very hurtful and repulsive. If she is still the naive self who loves fantasy when they first met, Wen Siqi will definitely not be able to please her.
But people are always changing, Jiang Xinran is unmoved by Wen Siqi's ruthlessness, she just looks at that face slightly distracted.
How long ago, she trembled because of the smile on this face, but now she is calm about it.
I don't know what's wrong, just looking at that face through the light like this, my restless mind quietly calmed down, only caring about that face.
Moving her lower back to make herself lean more comfortably, Jiang Xinran said, "You told me to let go of my desires and attachments, so why don't you let me let go."
"Can't let go."
Wen Siqi didn't think about it, she didn't think carefully before every sentence she usually said.
"Do unto others, do not impose on others."
"So, just a suggestion."
He looked carefully, trying to see what she was obsessed with from the face filled with a faint smile.
Unfortunately, she couldn't see it, but unexpectedly she saw something other than persistence.
Wen Siqi was laughing at herself, and she was also struggling, not the struggle of drowning, she had the ability to come and go freely in the water, but she was struggling whether to leave the water or drown in the water.
And this struggle has existed for a long time, Jiang Xinran thought, the struggle should have appeared when she was abandoned, Wen Siqi wanted to completely drown in the water and get rid of the pain on the water surface, but there was something persistent on the water surface that made her reluctant to let go, just like this, ups and downs... ...ups and downs...still ups and downs.
[I will take her to leave this island safely, and I will also watch her become an adult and find someone worthy of entrustment before leaving]
A sentence suddenly came to mind, when Wen Siqi insisted on looking for the water that flowed into the swamp, she answered her own words.
Suddenly she had a guess that Wen Siqi would struggle until now, and Wen Suiyun was part of the reason, and also the most important reason, once this reason was no longer important, Wen Siqi would probably drown in the water.
A chill suddenly rose up the spine and rushed to the head, freezing his thoughts.
Jiang Xinran shivered and came back from thinking.Turning around, his attention looked over the fire, and immediately fell on Wen Siqi who was opposite.
The flames sway with the flowing wind, shadows and light intertwine on the calm face, light and smile go hand in hand, shadows and weeping go hand in hand.
Her heartstrings trembled suddenly, and Jiang Xinran subconsciously sat up straight.
"What's wrong?"
The soft words are like whispers in the ear, quietly soothing the panicked mind.
Jiang Xinran put away her thoughts, looked away, and wrote lightly: "It's nothing, I've been relying on it for a long time, and my back feels a little uncomfortable."
Like another illusion, Wen Siqi's face was normal, neither smiling nor crying under the firelight and shadow.
It's all just speculation...
No, it's not!
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