Even the murderous little Raven

When taking a shower that night, Xiao Shou couldn't bear to look directly at the person in the mirror.

The midlife crisis is truly terrifying!

The seven-year itch might really exist!

Especially for this 35-year-old middle-aged man with sagging skin, wrinkled eyes, not thin calves, fat thighs, big butt butts, thick but not firm arms, and rumored abs.

Xiao Shou squeezed the swimming ring on his body, how much will the meat be sold for?What a waste to grow on me!

"Crack!" Xiao Shou clutched his butt, it was really not flexible, and it didn't feel good enough.

The little shou touched his ass, wondering what happened to the chrysanthemum?Xiao Shou opened both sides of the butt and looked at the little chrysanthemum in the mirror, then poked it with his finger.

so tight!Must not be used often!

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Xiao Shou suddenly felt that the seven-year curse of the married woman Xiao Zhou on him might become a reality, and he would definitely be abandoned if it went on like this.

Well, are there any tears? !

In order to change his fate of being abandoned soon, Xiao Shou decided to continue practicing buttocks from tonight! ! !

Butt skills are indeed the lifelong career of every high-quality teen, and you must not give up, otherwise you will become a middle-aged wretched uncle, not cute at all!

Xiao Shou secretly hid in the bathroom to practice his buttocks, and hated himself even more deeply. Why is he so fat?Why is there so much flesh on his body?

He was going to practice for half an hour, but was out of breath within 10 minutes.

In fact, the practice of buttocks should be done step by step, and you should not rush it, so I will stop here today, anyway, I will continue tomorrow.

The above is what every girl who decides to lose weight must say, Xiaoshou copied it.

So he lay on the bed motionless like a dead dog with peace of mind.

"It's cold, put the quilt on quickly." Xiao Gong was lying on the bed with a notebook on his lap, typing quickly on the keyboard with his fingers.

Xiaoshou moved and moved, retracting little by little into the quilt, wrapping his feet around Xiaogong.

Xiao Gong smiled and clamped his feet between his calves to keep him warm, "Aren't you going to type today?"

Xiao Shou shook his head.

Xiao Gong turned off the bedside lamp, leaving only the light on the computer screen, "Go to sleep!"

Xiao Shou retracted his head into the quilt, trying to stealthily lift off Xiao Gong's pajamas.

"Don't make trouble."

"People just want to count your abs!"

Xiao Gong smiled, continued with the work at hand and ignored him.

Huh!Is this the default?hey-hey……

Xiao Shou hid under the blanket and unbuttoned Xiao Gong's clothes even more vigorously, poked his hand in and touched it again and again, so envious, so jealous, God is really unfair!

One, two, three, four... blah blah, and then there are six dollars.

Xiao Gong looked at the quilt that suddenly swelled up on his chest with a funny face, Xiao Shou's round head was moving around under the quilt, and his hands were dishonest.

"Hey, hey, don't move around." Is this guy trying to seduce me tonight?

Xiao Gong patted Xiao Shou's hand, "Don't take off my pants."

"No." Xiao Shou said dully, he just wanted to take a look!

The slightly cold hand touched Xiao Gong's abdomen recklessly, and there was a downward trend, not to mention that Xiao Shou's breath was still hitting Xiao Gong's abdomen and chest, making it itchy.

Xiao Gong put the book aside, lifted Xiao Shou out from under the quilt and pressed it on the pillow, "Where did you read about seducing Dafa on a forum? Or was it another idea from your readers?"

Xiao Shou blinked innocently, this is a supernatural situation, if I knew I didn't count my abs, it would be shocking to say.

Xiao Shou squeezed her fleshy belly, "Why do you still have six pack abs and I only have this big one now?"

"Since when have you had one?"

"Oh, I don't want you to hit people like this."

Xiao Gong kissed Xiao Shou, "Hey, don't make trouble with me today, I've been very tired these two days, can't I save it for the weekend?"

For your sister, don't make it sound like she's very horny, she really just wants to count your abs, well, there seems to be some kind of seduction by the way.

"Well, people know, then you should go to bed earlier tonight."

Where can you find such a sensible and considerate shou!Hurry up and pounce on me xxoo!

However, Xiao Shou concealed it too well, Xiao Gong obviously didn't understand Xiao Shou's desire to be xxooed at the moment, so he let Xiao Shou go to the bathroom to wash up.

Xiao Shou bit the quilt and watched Xiao Gong leave, woo woo woo, don't even send it to your door, is it really because you are too tired from work?

Or, have I really become a product that no one wants?

Oh, the cruel reality!It's all made up by Lord Anonymous!

Tonight was hit again, failed to seduce and was rejected for dedication, Xiao Shou deeply felt that tonight was destined to be a sleepless night.

So, he!sleep!Go!up!

When Xiao Gong finished washing and came out, he found that Xiao Shou had fallen asleep lying on the pillow, with a puddle of saliva still left.

Xiao Gong took out the spare pillowcase and changed it, wiped his mouth with a wet towel, and kissed him.

Really, such a grown-up person is still like a child, and he never grows up.Xiao Gong turned off the light with a smile, and hugged Xiao Shou in his arms.

When Xiao Shou woke up in the morning, it was already past nine o'clock in the morning, and the sun rarely came out.

"It looks like the weather is fine outside." Xiao Shou stretched his waist before getting up slowly.

Xiao Gong had already gone to work, but he bought him breakfast before leaving.

Xiao Shou drank soy milk and ate deep-fried dough sticks and exclaimed that the days without going to work are so beautiful, Shenlu Company is going to close down!

I don't know if his former manager is still working as a nun, and most importantly, if he is lucky enough to have a look at her bald head, otherwise he will really regret it for the rest of his life!

With a deep-fried dough stick in his mouth and a glass of water in his hand, he started surfing the Internet. QQ is a fetish. Human communication technology has become so diversified, but QQ has not been eliminated.

It’s still the same penguin as it was seven years ago, and it’s still the same operation interface as it was seven years ago. It’s really not easy for this strong little body to withstand the double oppression of modern science and technology and the inferiority of human beings who love the new and hate the old. Yes, it hasn’t changed much in seven years. Xiaoshou guessed that the ultimate goal of QQ may not be to have no tooth decay, but to make older and 90s people know how to operate even if they are demented.

With such a great goal, Xiao Shou easily mastered how to use QQ seven years later, and said that there is no pressure at all.

Xiaoshou went to QQ, eager to chat with her ex-manager about her bitter history after becoming a monk, but...

Why is her profile picture a wedding photo?

Which bastard helped her PS deceive all netizens?It's too much!

He ran to Xiao Zhou, a married woman, and said, "Did the QQ of our former manager of Shenlu be stolen? Why did I see a woman's wedding photo? The PS technology is terrible, how could that woman look better the longer she grows?" ? And not even a bald head!"

Xiao Zhou, a married woman, once again spanked his ass and despised him, "You have some common sense, okay?"

"Why do I have no common sense?"

"She met the abbot of Beichan Temple two months ago, so the two got married and got married, even the news was reported."

"It's too scary!" Xiao Shou was shocked.

"When will she become a monk again?" I haven't seen her bald head yet!

"Not for the time being. I heard that she plans to continue harming the city's Internet companies and is looking for a next home."

"She was bald when she became a monk, right? Didn't she practice with her hair for seven years?"

"No, I heard that the head is shaved. When taking wedding photos, the two bald heads of the bride and groom make it very difficult for the photographer, because they always reflect light."

Xiao Shou once again carefully looked at the profile picture of the former manager. Your sister's PS actually showed her hair for P, and she still has beautiful wavy hair. This is unscientific! ! !

However, what is even more unscientific is that Xiao Zhou, a married woman, sent him a photo of her former manager without makeup. Be virtuous and virtuous.

The photographer is truly a genius! PS is really a miracle!

Xiao Shou sent a text message to Xiao Gong, "Darling, let's take a photo shoot this week! If you want a restricted rating, they can reluctantly agree!" There was also a shy expression.

"Why do you suddenly want to take a photo?"

"If we don't shoot, we will grow old."

"We won't get younger if we take pictures."

"But you can deceive yourself and others and confuse everyone!"

"Didn't we take wedding photos back then?"

"Nani!!! The wedding photo!!! Where is it? Where is it? Quickly find it and show it to me." Does the wedding photo make you feel happy when you hear it?

Xiao Gong can imagine that Xiao Shou has jumped up from the chair at this time, and every time he mentions the wedding photo to him, he will get excited, "You can't do it, why don't you even forget where the wedding photo is? It was still you I deliberately hid it in the safe, saying that I was afraid of being stolen."

"Nonsense, how could I do such a stupid thing!" Xiaoshou asked for the password of the safe. There were only two thick wedding photos in the huge safe, and there was no cash of a dime!

If a thief comes to their house, they must cry to death.

But, as soon as Xiaoshou opened the photos, he felt that it was necessary to buy a safe and hide the wedding photos, okay? ! !

Because her husband is really handsome, handsome, handsome.

Xiao Shou is holding the wedding photo and smiling on the ground. Of course, the person next to the handsome husband is also pretty and pleasant. At first glance, it is a high-quality Xiao Shou. The literary and artistic temperament and gentle and shy image are very perfect!Very good match!

When Xiao Gong heard Xiao Shou laughing out loud, he really couldn't laugh or cry.

So for the next whole day, Xiao Shou was in a very happy and complete state, beautiful and didn't want to go out, do not want to do hygiene, didn't want to cook, and didn't want to move.

Xiao Shou heated up the leftovers from the day before yesterday and hastily settled his three meals a day.

He swipes through Weibo, plays WeChat, reads meaty articles, opens GV... all kinds of leisure, depravity, and wretchedness!

At eight o'clock in the evening, Xiao Gong called to ask Xiao Shou what he wanted to eat, so all kinds of snacks, drinks and barbecues were served on the table.

Woohoo, I finally know where the fat all over my body came from?They are all raised by my family!

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