absolutely attracted

He dragged his suitcase and walked for a while on the road, but he didn't know where to go. There seemed to be no place in this huge city B that could accommodate him.After standing blankly on the side of the road for a long time, he finally had to take a taxi to Song Qingyang's house.

Song Qingyang called on the way, "Bai Wei, where are you when I'm done working, let's have dinner together later."

When Song Qingyang's voice sounded, Xia Bai felt a little warm.

"Qingyang, can you take me in for a few nights?" Xia Baiwei paused while holding the phone, and then said, "I just came out of Gu Jinxing's house, and I'm on my way to your house."

"You, what do you take in? Isn't my home your home? See you later, and I'll go back now."

After hanging up Song Qingyang's phone call, Xia Baiwei leaned against the car window and for some reason remembered that five years ago, he had nowhere to go, but he was even worse at that time, and there was no one like Song Qingyang who could take him in. friend.

four years ago.It is April day in the world, and the classroom outside the school classroom window is full of spring.The few flowers next to the teaching building that I don't know what they are called are very delicate and beautiful. When the wind blows gently, the fragile petals fall all over the ground.

"Xia Baiwei, what's going on?" When Yu Ze and Song Tuo dragged her out of the class, Xia Baiwei was still in a foggy state.

"It's like this, someone reported you and Gu Jinxing's puppy love yesterday, and it has already gone to the Academic Affairs Office." Song Tuo explained from the side to stop Yu Ze's bluffing.

Xia Baiwei was hospitalized a few days ago because of acute gastroenteritis, and he just returned to school today.When I entered the classroom in the morning, I didn't know why I received the attention of the whole class. Xia Baiwei didn't memorize a single word, and he felt restless.Looking around the classroom, there was no sign of Gu Jinxing.

All in all, Gu Jinxing sent him a message on the first day of his leave, but then it seemed like he lost contact, and he didn't reply to the message.

"Isn't Gu Jinxing competing for the recommended places recently? We wondered if this could be malicious competition." Song Tuo looked at Xia Baiwei and continued, "The person who reported it is said to have taken photos, but there are also photos. Probably P's... right."

As if afraid of offending Xia Baiwei, Song Tuo added cautiously.

Xia Baiwei was flustered for a while, this matter was too unexpected, but after hesitating for a while, he decided to speak out, "I don't know the photo, but I am indeed talking with Gu Jinxing in love."

"Damn it, it's impossible, brother Gu is not gay at all, he likes Su Jiahe." Yu Ze immediately had a face of disbelief, his mouth opened wide in surprise, and Song Ta covered it again.

"I'm sorry, Gu Jinxing didn't tell us, so we don't know, you two are... falling in love." Song Tuo was also a little at a loss, and this matter was indeed a bit beyond the knowledge of the two of them.

Song Tuo and Yu Ze are the same age as Gu Jinxing, and they grew up in the same community. The three of them have a very good friendship.But Gu Jinxing skipped grades when he was a child and was one grade higher than the two of them.Song Tuo said that they didn't know that he and Gu Jinxing were in a relationship, Xia Baiwei felt normal, because he and Gu Jinxing were very careful to protect this secret.But Yu Ze said that Gu Jinxing likes Su Jiahe, what does that mean?

After Yu Ze and Song Tuo went back, Xia Baiwei was called to the teaching office again, and the teaching director babbled a lot at him, but he didn't listen to a word.I just couldn't help thinking about what Yu Ze said, does Gu Jinxing like Su Jiahe?How can it be?

"Do you know how big of a scandal this is for our Middle School?"

"You are two male classmates! Can you bear the negative impact on the school?"

The dean's saliva almost sprayed on Xia Baiwei's face, and Xia Baiwei wiped his face a few times in disgust.It's not because puppy love is a scandal, but because he and Gu Jinxing are boys, so it's a scandal.Xia Bai slightly understood the meaning of the dean's words, and lowered his head, not wanting to refute anything.

His hands were hidden in his sleeves and clenched slightly. He bowed his head not because he was ashamed of being one of the protagonists of the "scandal" in which two men fell in love, but because he took a lot of courage to face himself, but was caught Humans are considered different.

When the dean left the office, he asked Xia Baiwei not to come to the school for the time being, so as not to have a bad influence on the school, and then said, "I have already contacted your father, let him take you back later."

About an hour later, Xia Zhiyu came in from the door in a hurry, and before he even had time to close the door, he came straight over and slapped Xia Baiwei, "Xia Baiwei, why did you become like this?"

There was burning pain on the right side of his face. Facing the double pain both psychologically and physically, Xia Baiwei's eyes turned red, and he raised his head stubbornly to look at Xia Zhiyu, "What have I become? I haven't changed anything, it's you changed."

Xia Zhiyu's face became even more gloomy in an instant, "Since your mother left, you have been lawless, haven't you, and now you have made such a shameful thing, and you are still talking back to me here!"

Seeing that Xia Zhiyu wanted to make a move again, he was quickly stopped by the head teacher who suddenly pushed the door open, "Hey, Mr. Xia, you need to communicate with your child well, don't make a move."

The homeroom teacher comforted Xia Zhiyu to sit down, and said to Xia Baiwei, "Xia Baiwei, go to the classroom to pack your things first, and go home to rest for a few days."

Xia Bai covered the slap marks on his face and was about to walk out of the office when he heard the head teacher add from behind, "Don't slacken your studies at home, remember to come back and take the college entrance examination."

Xia Bai gave a slight "um", but for some reason, he suddenly had the urge to cry.

On the way back to the classroom to get the books, the people around looked at Xia Baiwei, some were curious, some were probing, some were even more contemptuous and fearful.The books from childhood told them that reproduction in nature is continued by the union of men and women, so they looked at Xia Baiwei and thought he was a monster, which was abnormal.

In the third year of high school, the table became a single row. When Xia Baiwei came in, he saw his former deskmate Xiang Yue wiping something on his desk with an eraser. The two large pencil words that were too late to finish erasing should be written. It's "pervert," with the words "disgusting" and "gay" scrawled in red ink next to it.

Picking up the schoolbag by herself, Xiang Yue raised her head to see him coming back, and anxiously covered the graffiti-covered surface with a book, "Xia Baiwei, leave them alone..."

Not very good at responding to other people's kindness, Xia Bai picked up his schoolbag and walked outside, leaving only two dry words, "Thank you."

The moment he stepped out of the classroom, the originally silent classroom exploded in an instant.

There are gossips and discussions, the young man has a straight back and can survive the hidden arrows of the people, let alone the worldly spears.

The ugly words were left behind, and when the eyes stretched forward, they couldn't see the person they wanted to see.The person who was supposed to be with him was not by his side.

After packing his things and carrying his schoolbag to the school gate, Xia Zhiyu had long since disappeared, leaving only the driver behind to take him home.Seeing Xu Yueying and a large group of people doing nothing in Bai Junhua's studio when returning home, Xia Bai rushed over slightly, "What are you doing in my mother's studio?"

"Hey, you're back. You made your dad so angry today. He said, he really wishes he didn't have your son." After Xu Yueying mocked Xia Baiwei, she turned to the servant behind her and said, "Take these paintings They all moved to the attic, this room needs to be vacated.”

"Don't touch these paintings." Xia Bai rushed over to stop the servant, and put the removed paintings back to their original positions.

"By the way, Bai Wei." Xu Yueying seemed to be amused by Xia Baiwei's actions, and then touched her stomach and said, "You're going to have a younger brother."

"Your father said that this room will be transformed into a baby room in order to welcome the birth of the baby."

Xia Baiwei gradually put down the hand holding the painting, and looked at Xu Yueying in disbelief.

"I think it's incredible, do you have more incredible things to tell you?"

"Your father has always regretted breaking up with the family because of your mother."

"During your mother's hospitalization, your father was with me every day."

"I also have every gift your father gave your mother, including that custom-made necklace."

As if in hell, the demon whispered to Xia Bai.He covered his ears and ran back to his room, closed the door and curled up on the ground, tears streaming down his face.Xia Baiwei only found out today that her mother has been living under the illusion of a happy life, but the truth is so cruel and absurd.

After being beaten by Xia Zhiyu, I heard the truth from Xu Yueying.Xia Baiwei couldn't stay at home any longer, so he found a short-term rental house outside after he ran away from home.

On the second day after leaving school, that is, the day he ran away from home, Xia Baiwei lay on the bed in the hotel, took out his mobile phone and opened the chat records with Gu Jinxing, the message records stayed on the night of his first day in the hospital, Gu Jinxing Xing asked him how he was doing.

Typing repeatedly in the chat box, and deleting one by one.Why didn't you come to school?Why didn't you contact me?What does Yu Ze mean?

At night, Xia Baiwei received another call. When the truth was revealed, it was simple and cruel.

"I don't know my son yet, he's just looking for something fresh for a while."

"You are all too young to understand any feelings at all."

"Let's break up, Gu Jinxing confessed to me, he was just playing around."

I don't know how long this phone call took, Xia Baiwei felt like he was having a nightmare, a complete nightmare.It was clearly a middle-aged man's voice that was calm and majestic, but Xia Baiwei felt it was a bit harsh. After he insisted on listening, he could only respond calmly, "Let Gu Jinxing talk to me by himself."

For the next few days, Xia Baiwei thought a lot by himself, at first he could deceive himself, Gu Jinxing must have liked him too.

However, the dialog box that has not received a response for a long time, and the words of Gu Jinxing and Yu Ze who never appeared, made him continue to doubt, and then he could only believe.

Gu Jinxing was just playing around, he really never liked himself.

On the day he figured it out, he deleted all contact information with Gu Jinxing on social software, and finally only sent two text messages.

There is always someone who wants to stand up and make a settlement, so let him come.

——Break up, Gu Jinxing.

——Maybe at that time, no matter who it is, I will nod and agree. You are just playing for fun, and I am just too lonely.

The strange self-esteem allowed him to say cruel words against his heart, but on the day of departure, Xia Baiwei sat on the flight to England and prayed for Gu Jinxing all the time.

Those words that he left behind as he stepped out of the classroom:

"No wonder I was so indifferent to everyone before, it turns out I'm gay."

"God, this is the first time I've seen this when I grow up."

"It's a little disgusting, uh, why do boys like boys?"

"My mother said it's not normal, it's a disease, and I need to see a psychiatrist."

He hoped that Gu Jinxing would not hear.He hopes that the boy he really likes can walk proudly among the flowers and blessings all the way, not to be discriminated against by the world, not to be derogated by the ignorant.