Heartbeat misses Nick Charlie

Aled is right.Nick and I are two big fools.

We talked about each other all day long, discussing life after a long-distance relationship.Talking about this openly and honestly didn't scare me, it just made me more confident that we were going to be okay and that life would go on as usual.

Everything will be fine, and this time I mean it.

Go to fucking college and get us in a lot of trouble.

Nick was going to drive me home, but I told him to drive straight to his house.I messaged Victoria to say I was staying overnight at Nick's and she would explain it to my parents.

As stupid as it sounds, we spent the night chatting, surfing the web together, chatting, laughing, and dozing off.I wondered what it would be like to be like this for the rest of my life, and seriously, it would be awesome.

One moment we were lying together and the next we were kissing, and while it wasn't unusual, this time it felt very different.I don't want to make this too romantic, having a day like this, being able to kiss is enough.But...I don't know, why I've been...more than two years together, why do I still feel such overflowing happiness in his arms?We kissed for a long time, as if we went back to two years ago, we watched a movie together on Nick's couch.His hands gently ruffled my hair, caressed my back, and then slid down my buttocks, my brain shutting down.Then he suddenly undressed me and laughed at me for clumsily unbuttoning his shirt, I asked him if he wanted it, and he said yes before I could finish, and he started unbuttoning my belt , while I reached into his nightstand for condoms.We kissed again, rolled over on the bed, and needless to say what happened next.

I don't know if it's because we're both super emotional today, or if we're just tired, or if the past few weeks have been so miserable - which definitely sounds weird - but I do remember the first time we had sex, and I Both were terrified to death.

The first experience was so bad it was kind of bad enough.Can you understand what I'm talking about?I could see that our reasons for fear were different this time compared to the first time.I can pretend that we're not afraid that this will be our last, that we're not afraid of losing each other, but that's just self-deception.

Nick caresses me, as if he fears that the next moment I'll be gone forever.When we were finally stripped of our clothes, he stopped and stared at me, as if trying to remember the moment.As our bodies mingle, he whispers my name in my ear over and over until I realize how ridiculous it is and tell him to shut up, but he just grins and continues on over and over Whispering in my ear, I was amused by him giggling.I hugged him tightly, as if this would keep him by my side forever.I used to think it was pathetic to think stupid shit, but I don't feel that way anymore.I kept thinking over and over, I want him to be with me, I want him to stay with me.

When it was over, we lay quietly for a while, Nick's head on my chest, our legs crossed.I reached over to his bedside table and turned on the radio, only to find it was 3:[-] in the morning—is it that late?I thought Nick was asleep and closed my eyes, but a few minutes later I heard a click and realized that Nick had actually taken a picture of us laying down with his phone.

"Nick!" I snatched his phone to examine the photo, and he grinned from ear to ear.

"There's nothing better than a candid photo after the fact." I ignored him, just looked at the candid photo - it was very similar to those photos Nick took with a disposable camera, very natural, Nick curled up on me Beside him, smirking toward the camera, my head rests against him, eyes closed, mouth slightly open.

"Don't delete it please," Nick said.

"I didn't." I looked at it for a while, and then returned the phone to him. "Don't post it on Instagram."

"Can I set it as my phone wallpaper?"

"Whoa, are you going to change Henry's picture? Are you finally loving me more than your dog?"

"Well, that doesn't seem to be the case." I rolled onto him. "It's too much." Nick smiled, reaching out and hugging me. "Okay okay. I love you more than my dog."

"can."

"Actually, I love you more than anyone else," he said in a soft voice.I lifted my head from his neck and looked into his eyes.

"Would that be weird?" he continued, laughing again immediately. "I'm only 18 years old."

"I don't know," I said. "Maybe." Of course it's weird, we both know it's weird, and we know we're weird compared to other couples our age.We play together every day, and we can also just be with each other.We wondered every day when this feeling would go away and then the teenage relationship would go away with it, but it never went away and we just got along day by day.

But it's really blissful, oh my god, it's just beautiful.

"I'm weird anyway," I said.It doesn't seem appropriate to say "I love you more than anyone" back to him, although he is indeed the person I love the most in the world.

Nick hugged me a little tighter, "Yeah".Because he already knew this.