The princess is reborn

Xie Yan hugged me very tightly, which also made me very painful. His expression was gloomy and gloomy, with gray eyes that I had never seen before, like a lifeless but rough black sea.

His iron-like arm firmly trapped me in his embrace, and his ten fingers held my arm tightly, as if he was trying his best to hold the passing sand in his hand, and it was also as if he was desperately grasping what belonged to him. Precious treasures that began to disappear into thin air.

I don't understand why he suddenly became like this, but I can feel that he is very insecure at the moment, and desperately needs my promise and comfort, so I try to relax my limbs and let him hold me tightly, and hide me softly In his arms, it was like Mr. Dong Guo who was bewitched by a wolf and knew nothing about the danger.

I was full of doubts about such a strange reaction to Xie Yan, and I really wanted to ask him why he said that, but I subconsciously felt that he would not tell me.

From what I know about Xie Yan, the way he treats me is the same as the way my father treats me. Although there are differences in attitude, they both lead to the same goal in the end.

Xie Yan treats me like an ignorant child more often, supervising my reading, writing and playing chess on weekdays, not allowing me to go to the streets to cause trouble, and not allowing me to talk to others. To show me face.

Speaking of it, I am more like a child raised by him, and he will treat me coldly when I am disobedient. Although he is not my father, he is more severe than my father in monitoring and restraining me.

No matter how difficult things he encountered, he never told me, he just kept it in his heart, his handsome face was cold and frowning all day long.Even if I pressed hard, I would not get a clear answer, as if I was afraid that I would ruin his business.

And I really don't have any solid skills, even if I know the ins and outs of the matter, I guess it will only add to his confusion.So at this time, although I am angry, I have learned to be silent and obedient.

Sometimes I hate myself for being too stupid, incompetent, incapable, and unable to help.But then I thought, maybe my father and Xie Yan don't need my help, they just want me to be obedient and not cause trouble.

So I patted Xie Yan on the back obediently, and said in a very light tone, as if comforting an extremely disturbed dog, "I will believe in you. No matter what happens in the future, even if the sky falls, I will wait for you." You come to me."

"Now that you have become my husband, I naturally want to put you first. Whatever you say is what you say, but I am a little worried about you now."

Although my words sounded so nice, I didn't think so in my heart, I was just saying something nice to coax my thanks.

I don't know why, although my heart is full of passionate love for Xie Yan, but there is no half trust in this heavy love.It can be seen from the question I asked subconsciously from the last time he told me to listen to the story of his puppy.

I don't believe in Xie Yan, or in other words, I don't believe that I can make Xie Yan fall in love with me, and instead choose me in the balance between power and me.

From this period of getting along with each other, I think I have a full understanding of Xie Yan.He is indifferent, clean-spirited, keen on chasing power, and holds an indifferent attitude towards other things.

He must have paid endless hardships, blood and tears to climb from a powerless and powerless son of a singer to the position of today's honorable prince. How can I make him give up everything he has worked so hard for for me over the years.

Even if one day in the future I will become his victim in exchange for supreme power, I am fully prepared psychologically.

If that day really comes, I have no reason to hate him, after all, I am willing to take the initiative to like him.It's not his fault that he doesn't like me, he loves power more.

I can't ask him to repay me equally just because I like him with all my heart.

Like and love are never a transaction.

If I want to use my infatuation to hold Xie Yan's liking and love hostage, so that every penny is weighed and divided so clearly, this love will become insincere and philistine.

I do not like this.

Xie Yan got my promise, and then slowly relaxed the strength in his hands. Although he still tightly circled me, at least it was not the suffocating strength just now.

I breathed a sigh of relief and looked up at him, only to find that his eyes were bloodshot due to excessive emotions, his face was a little pale, and his face was disturbed, and he said to me, "Since we are married, your father's business Always put it after me, I think you care more about me."

He said it tactfully, but I understood what he meant, that he wanted me to choose him between my father and him.

But how can I do it?Not only can I not do it, I can't even lie to him and coax him at this time.

I looked at the hope emerging from Xie Yan's quiet gray pupils, and hurriedly looked away, not daring to meet his gaze, I just shook my head firmly, "I can do everything else, but daddy is always the most important thing , after daddy is you, besides daddy, I like you the most."

I was worried that Xie Yan would be unhappy, so I quickly kissed the corner of his lips to please him, and coaxed, "I like you the most, I can even give you my body, and I will tell you all the secrets, you still don't believe it Am I sincere?"

I cunningly avoided Xie Yan's question and gave him the answer tactfully.My choice has never changed. Between Xie Yan and Daddy, I choose Daddy.

Why can't I have Xie Yan and Daddy at the same time?

From the bottom of my heart, I feel that there is no need to ask Xie Yan's question. I love both of them very much, and we will live together well in the future.Thinking of this, I felt less guilty towards Xie Yan, and slowly unfolded the beautiful blueprint for the future before his eyes.

"Why do you always compare yourself with my dad? We will be together in the future, and my dad will also be your dad in the future. Let's respect him together, okay? Why do you always ask these questions?"

What I said gave the two of us a step up, making it less cruel that I did not choose Xie Yan, and it also made it less embarrassing that Xie Yan was not chosen.

Xie Yan's thin lips were pursed into a straight line at this time, as if he was seriously considering my answer, a trace of loneliness flashed in his cold phoenix eyes, his eyes were as cold as heavy snowflakes in winter.

He pursed his lips and chose to give in. He held my cheek with his cool fingertips, and his deep eyes seemed to be looking into my heart, like a bright lamp illuminating my deliberate dodge at a glance.

Xie Yan has never been easy to fool. My answer, which was both positive and negative, made him lose face, but there was no sullen emotion on his face. Instead, he was gentle and tolerant. His long eyelashes fluttered, and there seemed to be love in his eyes. . Ambiguous feelings flow.

I was so dull that I didn't understand Xie Yan's eyes. I only heard him sigh, as if he had made a difficult choice and told me after a long time.

"Since you have chosen your father, then promise me that no matter what happens in the future, you will trust me. Wait until I come to you, understand?"

I couldn't help being a little embarrassed, Xie Yan saw through the clever cover-up in a blink of an eye, and nodded in embarrassment, "I will believe you, I will like you, and I will wait for you."

"Feng Jiuyue," Xie Yan stared at me steadfastly, as if he wanted to see how sincere I was from my eyes, and wanted to know how serious my words were.

I can only accept his inspection with the most serious and cautious posture. His eyes are like the cold vertical pupils of a poisonous snake. He looks me up and down, which makes me shudder.

He grabbed me by the back of the neck like a pet, and forced me to meet his eyes. There was no impurity in the beautiful eyes, only too serious and stubborn.

His cool fingertips rubbed against the side of my face, his voice was cold and warning, "If you lie to me, I won't let you go."

I know that this is his usual trick of playing hard and soft, and often when he said this, he was still satisfied with my answer, and I was fooling it.

I didn't take his strong and treacherous attitude to heart, I just nodded seriously, then snuggled into his arms again, and reminded me with a blushing face, "When is the bridal chamber?"

After saying this, I blushed from my cheeks to the tips of my ears, secretly hating myself for being so proactive.

But the other party is Xie Yan, he looks so good-looking, and I like him so much, isn't it normal to want to get close to him?

When I thought of this, I felt confident again, and took the initiative to wrap my arms around Xie Yan's neck, and the sleeves fell to the shoulders during the movement, exposing a large area of ​​skin on my hands.

Although I think I'm ugly, my skin is not inferior to Xie Yan's, and even a little fairer than Xie Yan's.Xie Yan's white is the kind of cold white that surpasses frost and snow, while my white is more feminine, with powder from fingertips to knees like a little girl.

Xie Yan's eyes followed my movements and fell on my arm. I don't know when the moonlight came to my hand. He stared at the moonlight in a daze, his eyes became deeper and deeper, staring at my eyes like a wolf. wrist.

When I saw his eyes like this, I felt a little trembling, and I remembered the picture album I read before. Whether it was between men or between men and women, the expression on the bottom side was very painful.I suddenly felt a little scared, it was my first time, what should I do if I fainted from the pain, wouldn't it be embarrassing.

Xie Yan seemed to feel my retreat, he grabbed my hands that were about to run away, and tied my hands behind him.

Because my hands were restrained, in this posture, I unconsciously raised my chest. The current situation is that I am sitting on Xie Yan's lap, and his hands are tied behind him with one hand, as if I am holding myself It's like sending the body to the other party's mouth.

I felt ashamed and angry, but Xie Yan didn't let me hide. His next movement made my breathing unbalanced. Through the thin clothes, he precisely bit my spring clothes.He already had canine teeth, but now the sharp canine teeth are biting at the vital position.My eyes were red, and I begged in a trembling voice, "Xie Yan, open your mouth, let go, let go of me."

Most of the clothes I wear when I sleep are light and thin, as thick as a man's style.The fact that the tulle is the same, and the material is silk, makes all this extremely unbearable.I struggled with my hands, twisting like a disobedient caterpillar, but it was more like wanting to refuse.

Xie Yan didn't let me go, he seemed to enjoy my unconscious struggle, the tip of his tongue was wet and sticky, slowly rolling over his white teeth, like a wolf eating delicious food.He restrained my two wrists with one hand, and idly controlled my waist with the other, forcing me to shake slightly. I was so angry that I was about to cry, with burning anger in my eyes.

But he continued to grab me in a leisurely manner, moving his palm back and forth, his eyebrows slightly raised, and his lips curved slightly.

He suddenly pulled my wrist back, raised my neck high, buried his head down, as if he was tasting some delicious food, and said slowly, "Let go? If you let me let go, why are you throwing yourself at me? hug?"

Obviously!Obviously!He almost snapped my wrist and asked me to pose like that, but the villain complained first.

My eyes were red with anger, and I stared at him fiercely, trying to convey my anger with my eyes.

But Xie Yan was even more excited when he saw my eyes like this, he gnawed and bit at me, how could I have experienced such a thing before, tears fell down in a hurry.

Although Xie Yan has a strange personality, he really hates seeing me cry. Every time I cry, he will make a certain degree of concession to me.

For example, he forces me to write on weekdays, and after I persist for a while, I must go to eat snacks, or go out to play with cats and dogs. He doesn’t allow it every time. He came to kiss my eyelids with extreme irritability, and then he would agree to my request.

I started to shed tears just because he would be soft-hearted to me, but Xie Yan just gave me a deep look, then leaned close to my ear and said to me, "Save for a while and cry."

Xie Yan is really powerful, he guessed my reaction very accurately, I did cry a lot and kept begging for forgiveness, but Xie Yan is a hard-hearted person, who disturbed my whole body, inside and out Even after the breakdown, he didn't want to let me go.

He told me with practical actions that he didn't mind that I was a monster, nor did he mind my deformed and ugly body. Not only did he not hate it, but I even thought he couldn't put it down.

I've never seen Xie Yan like that. He has always been as cold as ice, cold and dignified, unlike ordinary people, and he rarely shows such emotions.Thin sweat dripped from his forehead, dripping on my eyebrows, I looked at his long eyebrows, deep phoenix eyes, sharp nose bridge, cool thin lips, the heartbeat in his chest was frantic, I endured the pain, and it was so fierce Pull yourself up and hug him.

I hugged his broad shoulders tightly, feeling the muscles on his body with twisted beards, Xie Yan put on his robe and looked thin, like a frail scholar, but now, I know the murderer hidden deep under his robe. Beast, with my action like this, it got deeper, and I couldn't help but shed some tears again.

Xie Yan looked at me helplessly, he seemed to be wondering why I was asking for trouble, and kissed my ear with a doting look, he lifted me up and let me lean on his shoulder, with a look like She was blaming me for being overconfident, insisting on suffering, her voice was slightly hoarse, "Hold me tight."

I breathe lightly, wrapping my arms around his neck firmly, my brain is a little lack of oxygen, my eyes are looking at the moon outside the window, it is about to fall to the bottom of the cliff at this moment, why is Xie Yan still so brave? Interest, I don't understand these things, I just feel tired and want to cry.

At the beginning, my wheezing still broke out, Xie Yan could only stop, and patted my back to help me breathe smoothly. There was not much air left in my lungs, so he could only help me breathe out over and over again.

I know it's not good to stop abruptly, let alone when I'm still in the mood, but my health is really too bad, I really can't stand that kind of trial, so I can only stop and rest, I feel uncomfortable, but thank you Yan is very focused.

He kissed me intently, hugged me vigorously, his long and narrow phoenix eyes always paid attention to my movements, even when he saw my monster-like body, he didn't show any dislike in his eyes.

What to do, I really like the words of thanks.

He doesn't dislike me at all, he doesn't dislike me for being weak, and he doesn't dislike me for being a monster. How can there be such a good person?

As I thought about it, my tears couldn't stop, Xie Yan could only stop and kiss my ear, and asked me in a low voice, "Uncomfortable?"

"Or forget it tonight."

He looked at me quietly, although he said it sounded grand, but I didn't see him showing any signs of retreating, so I could only shake my head at him, "No need."

I couldn't help but buried my whole body in his arms, sniffled, endured the discomfort in my body, and said to him, "Xie Yan, I like you so much."

"Well," Xie Yan kissed the top of my hair and repeatedly emphasized to me, "you have to trust me the most."

After a night like this, Xie Yan didn't get up to get dressed until it was dawn. I was so sleepy that I couldn't open my eyes. I only saw the red scratches on his back covered by the brocade clothes, and felt that my nails were long. longer.

Xie Yan was fully dressed and walked to my bedside, pulling me out of the brocade quilt.With the coolness of early autumn, his fingertips landed on my chin, and his tone unconsciously brought a little intimacy, "Do you remember everything you said last night?"

I nodded, my voice was a little hoarse from crying too much, and I said in a low voice, "I remember clearly, I'll wait for you, trust you."

"Yeah." Xie Yan kissed the top of my hair, then rolled to my lips, making my lips red and swollen, I gasped lightly, his beautiful light-colored pupils looked at me deeply and for a long time, He didn't leave the window until I couldn't help urging him.

I can't go to the window to see him off as usual, I feel uncomfortable all over, Xie Yan and I are both doing this for the first time, I don't know how to do it, my whole body feels sore, sticky, greasy, really sleepy If I couldn't go down, I could only ask Xiaoman to fill up the tub with hot water, and ask him to change me into a clean bedding.

Xiao Man looked at the various stains on the quilt, a little confused, "My lord, the top..."

I didn't dare to meet his gaze, so I just turned cold and pretended to be serious, "Just throw it away and replace it with a new one for me."

"Yes, yes, yes." Xiao Man is used to seeing people's faces, so he hurriedly went out, and soon came in with a new bedding.

I told him carefully, "I want to rest today, don't bother me if I have nothing to do."

After Xiao Man went out, I struggled to get out of the bathtub, and returned to the bed with sloppy steps.I used to let Xiaoman wait for me to take a bath, but since Xie Yan found out about it, he got angry with me, so I had no choice but to change this habit.

But today I was really miserable, but I didn't dare to ask Xiaoman for help, because I didn't have a clean place all over my body.Xie Yan is like a dog in human form, gnawing, biting and licking me, if Xiaoman sees those things, my father will probably come here immediately, I dare not take the risk.

When I took a shower, I just washed my body indiscriminately and didn't clean it carefully, so I started to have a high fever after sleeping for a while, and my brain was so hot that I realized that I shouldn't let Xie Yan be so direct, but it was too late. It's too late.

I was so sick that I didn't even have the strength to worry about it. I woke up and fell asleep several times in my dream, just waiting for Xiaoman to come and call me for dinner. He would find out that I was sick and call a doctor for me.

But what I waited for was not a doctor, but many bizarre dreams. I had many dreams all over, some about my father, some about my mother, and some about Xie Yan.

And the dream that frightened me the most was that I dreamed that my father was taken to the execution ground, and the executioner's knife swung towards his neck.I wanted to rush up to stop it, but someone behind me grabbed me tightly and prevented me from going forward, so in pain and despair, I watched my father's head roll to my feet.

I burst into tears and hugged my father's body tremblingly. When I looked back, it turned out that the person behind me who had been blocking me was Xie Yan.

He looked at me coldly, completely missing the kindness and indulgence of last night, as if he was looking at a dead thing.

"No, Daddy, wake up, don't leave Xiaoqiu." Holding the bloody head in my arms, I cried so loudly that even my breathing was choked.

I opened my eyes in such a terrified situation, but saw the afternoon sun was shining brightly, and the dazzling light hit my face, which was warm. I gradually calmed down, but saw the crying girl on the bedside. Xiaoman.

Xiaoman grew up with me. He has a stable temperament and rarely cries like this. I quickly asked, "Xiaoman, what happened? Why are you crying all of a sudden?"

"Young Master! Young Master!" Xiao Man threw himself into my arms almost immediately, with snot and tears all over his face.

"Today, His Royal Highness the Crown Prince brought officers and soldiers over, saying that the master and Master Lin Ruilin formed a party for personal gain, and found a lot of evidence from the master's study, so the master was taken away."

"I just went to see the imperial list, and the master will be beheaded at noon tomorrow, son, what do you think should be done?"

"Thank you?" I bit my lower lip, only biting the tip of my tongue, and then asked, "You said, His Royal Highness the Crown Prince took my father away? Is it because of the crime of forming a party with Lord Lin Rui?"

"Yes, I heard it clearly today. The crown prince also said that this crime is not as serious as his family members, so you are not being held accountable, son."

"Hehe." Tears fell from my eyes in an instant, and fell straight to the wound on my lips. I kept repeating Xie Yan's name, "Xie Yan, Xie Yan, Xie Yan..."

The tenderness last night turned out to be nothing more than a deception by you. Now I understand why you suddenly became interested when you heard about Lord Lin Rui.

I suddenly laughed, and the way I cried and laughed was really funny.

Xiaoman was taken aback by me, and asked me in horror, "My lord, what's wrong with you, lord? You are the one I can't let go of the most, you can't let anything happen to you."

"Can I go out?" I endured the soreness in my body and the high fever on my forehead and wanted to get up from the bed. "My father should have other old departments. I want to find a solution with them."

"It can't be done, my lord," Xiao Man shook his head, "there are His Royal Highness's personal soldiers outside, you won't be able to leave the prime minister's mansion today."

"I don't believe it, I'm going to have a look."

I struggled to get up from the bed, but fell to the ground. Xiaoman quickly came to help me, and he led me to the door.

As soon as I opened the door, I saw soldiers in armor. When they saw me, they all showed surprise on their faces, then turned their eyes away in fear, and said to me, "Mr. Feng, please go back to the room to rest."

Xiaoman helped me back to the bed, and I looked at the bed curtain above my head in a daze, Xiaoman opened his mouth, trying to say something to me, but I waved my hand, "Go out."

"My lord, then call me if you have anything to do." Xiaoman looked back at every step very worriedly, but I ignored it.

The absurd smell of last night still lingered in the room, Xiaoman was covered by sadness and didn't notice it, but I could smell it clearly.

I thought of everything that happened last night, my throat was sticky, and I was so angry that I vomited out a mouthful of blood. My breathing seemed to be deprived by death, and there was no more air in my chest cavity.

I didn't go to get the medicine for my asthma. I just lay peacefully on the bed and waited for the suffocation to swallow me up. My consciousness gradually blurred. I even thought I would die in my sleep.

but I do not have.

I woke up in the evening and staggered to the mirror. The person in the mirror was pale, his lips were as dry as a ghost, and his neck, wrists, feet, and ankles were covered with bruises.

Thank you!He lied to me!He lied to me!He lied to me!

He had been lying to me all along!

I pushed the bronze mirror to the ground, and stepped on the naked fragments with bare feet, only to see scarlet blood dripping from my feet, "Xie Yan, why did you lie to me! I would rather you kill me!"

Why do you want to kill my father?Why didn't you come after me?Do you think I will be grateful to you if you spare my life?

I believe you?

Is this what happens when I believe you?

Oh no, Xie Yan was not the murderer who killed my father, it was me, the monster, who killed my father.

If I hadn't told Xie Yan about Uncle Lin, he wouldn't have gotten hold of it.

I hated Xie Yan so much, if he stood in front of me right now, I would stab him bloody with a knife, but I hated myself even more, why did I drink, why did I talk to Xie Yan when I was drunk.

Damn it's not my father, it's obviously me!

Why do you want to kill my father?

I'm the most damned person.

"Ah, son, your feet are bleeding."

When Xiaoman heard the sound of pushing the door and came in, he saw me stepping on the debris with bare feet, my face was still unconscious.

I let him carefully bandage me up, watched him put away all the pieces of the bronze mirror, and suddenly said, "Xiao Man, come here."

"Xiao Man, there is a brocade box under the son's bed, and there are many bank notes and silver taels in it. If you want to leave the house later, take them all away."

"There is also a lot of waste paper in the brocade box, you just burn them all."

"My lord, I don't want these. Don't scare Xiao Man. Xiao Man is cowardly. She can't stand any other scares."

Xiaoman shook his head desperately at me, as if he was afraid that I would continue to say these ominous words, so he hurriedly ran out again.

The brocade box actually contained some love letters I wrote to Xie Yan. Xiaoman can't count on it, but I still have myself.

I took out those letters and put them on the desk without opening them, as if I couldn't face that ridiculous past.

My high fever still persisted, and I lay limp on the bed. My tears never stopped, and my eyes were swollen like two walnuts.I thought I would not be able to fall asleep, but my body was tossed and tossed by that person all night, and I was so tired that I felt heavy sleepiness.

"Heh, you are so cheap, Feng Jiuyue." I said quietly to myself.

What were you thinking when Xie Yan touched me?Are you laughing at me, like those people laughed at me for recommending myself as a pillow, or are you trying to put on a show while suppressing the nausea in your belly?So this person really can do anything for a bright future.

My previous suspicions have become reality, I am not even better than the dog he raised, at least Xie Yan still has some sincerity towards it.

I cried and laughed and fell asleep.

I had a dream, dreaming of my mother, she was indeed very similar to me, but she was more charming and outstanding than me.

She was wearing a beautiful wisteria dress, with a slender figure, but her face was full of hatred. She strangled my neck tightly, and her eyes were full of hatred.

"You bastard, it's fine if you kill me. You still want to kill my husband. What did I do wrong to give birth to you, a terrible monster?"

"Go to hell, go to hell, go to hell!"

I didn't struggle, even with a peaceful smile on my lips, I tried to hug her, "Mother, I'm sorry, mother, I miss you so much."

She didn't let go, and I felt my breath getting weaker, but it was just a dream.

It turned out that I had another attack of asthma. When I recovered, I realized that it was almost noon.

I took out a clean white robe from the closet and changed into it. My father once said that I look good in this suit, so I will see him wearing this and make amends to him. He should forgive me sooner.

I combed my hair neatly, and I can be regarded as well-dressed. After a little satisfaction, I took off the belt, threw it on the beam, and stepped on the stool.

In my hand were the letters I took out of the brocade box, and I tore them all to pieces, watching them wither like petals and fall to the ground, just like my sincere heart that had been trampled on.

I stood on a low stool and looked at the distant mountains outside the window leisurely.I especially remember that when I was young, my father was not as busy with his official duties as he is now. He often took me to climb mountains. I was young and weak, and he asked him to carry me halfway through the climb.

My father would never reject me. He insisted on carrying me up and down such a towering mountain. His back was wet with sweat, but I slept soundly.

This is my father, who was killed by me, my father.

The noon bell rang heavily and quickly, like a sharp sword piercing my heart, I decisively kicked down the stool under my feet, and threw my head into the white circle.

Thank you, I hate it so much!

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My name is Feng Jiuyue, and my name is Muqiu.

I died the day after I turned 19.

I was a monster in love with a bad guy, I killed my mother when I was born, and then my father.

I once thought that death would bring me relief, but when I opened my eyes from the long-lasting chaos, I saw the world again.

Seeing me open my eyes, the attendant in front of me immediately revealed a look of surprise, and said to me, "My lord, you finally woke up!"

His calling reminded me of my attendant Xiaoman, he was simple-minded, and he also followed up and called me "Young Master", but the person in front of him was not Xiaoman.

There was a sharp pain on my forehead, I looked around, and found that the scenery here was indeed Jiang Guo's unique arrangement, I asked the man, "What year is it now?"

"My lord, didn't you fall stupid?" The attendant stared at me with wide eyes, and wanted to touch my forehead with concern, but I dodged it, and said awkwardly, "It's the first year of Jiang."

The first year of Dajiang, the third year after my death.